Rocky Road: Sequel Book Three

Chapter 7

Mike

“Are you frikken psycho?!” Paul reprimands me as he lets me pass the threshold of his hotel room door.

Removing my hood, I tell him, “Yeah, Paul, I am.”

His brows rise. “Wow. You’re not even gonna deny it.” He pushes the door closed behind me with a single push of his hand. “Does Malone know you’re here?”

I discard my hoodie and gloves to place them on the dresser next to the television. “She doesn’t need to know every move I make.”

“Won’t she start being suspicious if you don’t report to her every night?” My brother seems concerned; he shouldn’t be. Everything is mapped out.

“I’ve given her solid information – enough to satisfy her for a few days. Jace and Damien have it covered for now.” I lean back in the chair adjacent to the bed, exhausted from the attempts to stay hidden on the plane, in the airport, and around Rachel’s house.

The urge of making sure she’s safe – alone wears me out. But I made a promise to look after her. I ain’t breakin’ it.

“Are you getting any closer to shutting this thing down?” Paul takes a seat at the foot of the bed and rests his elbows on his knees to face me.

I sigh. “I sure hope so.”

Silence fills the small outdated, run-down hotel. The carpet is a seaweed color and the drapes match. The bedding is white, but the lampshades are a cream color; faded wooden nightstands and dressers give it even more of a rustic-abandoned look. I doubt the television has more than ten channels.

“So, why’d you follow her up here? Do you not trust me?” Paul breaks the otherwise quiet room.

Taking a moment, I ponder that. Should I tell him how I really feel?

I wave a hand at him. “Nah, I trust you. I just can’t be too far from her.” Leaning forward, I let it all out. “She’s the air in my lungs, Paul. She’s the blood in my veins. When I’m not near her, it’s like I can’t breathe, as though death is dragging me under. Then, when she’s close – my chest opens again and I’m more alive than ever. Without her around, the days are dark, malice. Then, when I see her face… the sun comes out to brighten my world. It’s hard to explain.” Internally, I smack myself. I sound like a chick – what the hell happened to me?

A blond bombshell exploded in your life – that’s what happened.

She came into your life, turned it upside down, and gave you a reason to become a better person; gifted you with having moments of pure love that you deserve…

Did I deserve it, though?

“I get it.” Paul’s words suddenly stop any other thought.

I’m not alone.

“You do?”

“Hell, yeah. Rachel’s it for me. I’d put a ring on it, but she wants to wait until after college.” Paul rolls his eyes.

Curiosity strikes me. “Does her family know how serious y'all are?”

“Oh, yeah. Her dad is cool with it…”

My brows pull together. “What about the rest of them?”

He waves a hand in the air then straightens his posture. “I still need to win over her ma, but I’m confident. Her brothers are cool.”

“Why isn’t her mom good with it?”

“She doesn’t trust me with her daughter,” he chuckles. “I get it. I mean we are constantly touching. It’s like we gravitate towards each other. It’s cute and foreign at the same time, but I don’t hate it one bit. Her mom is old school. She doesn’t want her daughter sleeping with me before she’s married. She’s scared that with her being alone with me all the time – her daughter and I might… Even though she ain’t a virgin – but she doesn’t know that.”

I squint my sights at him then point with two fingers. “You two…”

“No. not yet. Want to – desperately, but it wasn’t with me. Some asshat from her high school a couple of years ago. Treated her bad. I’m gonna beat him if I ever meet him.”

“Don’t blame you.” I’d do the same thing. Anyone who treats a woman in a negative way deserves their ass kicked.

Like you? My conscience points out. I didn’t treat her bad –

Well… It was complicated. Never meant to hurt her.

You still hurt her, Mike

Over. And over. And –

I shake my head and run my frustrated hands down my face. When will I stop arguing with myself?

“Speaking of… what about you?” The nearly twenty-year-old asks with squinted eyes with my sudden behavior change.

Good man not to ask what it was all about.

I run a nervous hand through my hair, not sure where he’s going with this. “What do you mean?”

He pinpoints me in the hotseat. “You don’t plan on ever coming back from the dead, so… what do you plan on doing when Elena dates again? You know that day will come.”

“I know.” My fingers fiddle with the loose fabric of the armrest.

“I’m just asking, cause you seem to have a difficult time letting her go,” he states slowly - cautiously.

He’s right. “When the time comes, I’ll back off. But only when I know that the guy she’s with is nothing like me. It needs to be someone good. I’ll get a background check on him and… try not to kill him.” I c***k my knuckle at the thought of another man holding her. Caressing her, loving her. Treating her in all the ways that I can’t.

Paul laughs at me. “We could just make it seem as though you went missing. You can get back into her life.”

I shake my head. “Too complicated. My ma will kill me herself; she’ll bring me back to life just to do it again and maybe give Elena a turn.” Shaking my head once more, I say firmly. “No. This is for the best. I’ve done nothing but give those I care about, grief.”

“What if she catches you? She’s already thinking she has a secret admirer out there with all those gifts you've given her. You held her at her freakin' prom!” I’m a bit taken aback with his tone and the fact that he knows.

“You know about all that?”

“Yeah. Her and Rachel talk – guess what? Rachel talks to me, too. What were you thinking?”

“I wasn’t. She never saw me. She never will; I’ve got this. You don’t need to worry.” I assure him with a firm hand.

He nods his head, knowing I won’t change my mind then says, “Can I ask you something?”

“Is it about Elena?” I can’t take any more questions about her.

“No.”

I kick my legs out to relax. “Alright. What’s up?”

“Why didn’t you let me in on what you and Jace were up to? That day at the precinct... You could have told me what was going on. What? You didn’t trust me?” Paul is hurt – those sad brown saucers tell me so. I don’t blame him.

“I trusted you as I trust you now. I just couldn’t risk anything happening to anyone if the word got out that the new president of the club and the outcast were collaborating to take down Randall. The fewer people who knew, the better. I couldn’t risk it.” I pause to let that sink in before continuing, “Randall destroyed the evidence that would have tied me to the murder of Elijah.”

“Shit.” He runs a hand over his face.

“Yeah. I owed him one. That’s why I went to Mexico and tried to be the son he always wanted but couldn’t get from Isaac or Darren. Then… hell broke loose, now here I am.” Switching my sights to the green carpet, I say, “I wanted to tell you, I wanted all the brothers to know, but it was risky.”

“Like it’s risky now with all of us knowing?” Paul scoffs.

Kicking my head back, I groan at the turn of the conversation. I’d rather talk about the future I won’t have with Elena. Bringing my head back up, I make eye contact with him. “I didn’t like that, but in the end, I think Jace, Derek, and I will need all the help we can get – FBI included. It scares me to death if one of the brothers slips and tells someone I’m alive and informing on the Marcus organization. Do you know what would happen? Malone can’t know either. She’d ruin us all.”

His face grows grim in the dull gold light of the lamps by the bed. “There would be a lot of blood to find you. Probably a pretty penny for your head, too.”

My voice drops. “Not to mention, Elena’s life could be in danger all over again -”

He strikes out his hand to stop me from saying anything more. “We can keep a secret. You should have known that from the beginning. We were able to keep everything from Elena.”

I can’t help the way my voice rises as my orbs burn into his. “Elena never held a pistol to your head, either, or dangle a loved one in front of you. We had to make him believe that I had nothing left. That Jace was in charge of the club, to let the club become more corrupt under Randall and Jace’s power and for Randall to think he owned them. It had to be that way. Everything that has happened, happened because it was supposed to.” I tear my sights from Paul and the wheels that are turning under his mop of disheveled, thick brown hair to study my hands. The blood isn’t visibly there, but I have that thick crimson dripping from them. “Everything that happened in Mexico shouldn’t have happened the way it did. Now I’m living with the consequences.”

“What happened in Mexico? You haven’t told me the whole story.”

Glancing at the clock, I note the time. It’s too late in the night and I would need a stiff drink. Perhaps four. “Maybe another time.”