Porn Prince

12. Hour Long Road Trip

Ivy sat in silence for a moment and I at first thought she didn't hear me. But I knew better. I knew that she heard me and she was just afraid to say anything. 

"Since you don't want to start. I will, why did you call me. Huh? Out of everyone. Why me?" It kills me that I can't look at her to see her face but I had to keep my eyes on the road. We didn't need two wrecks in her life at the moment, or three if you counted this spiral she's been on herself.

"Cause I knew you would do it and I missed you." She says and my eyes widen. Did I hear her right? I glance at her for verification and she is looking up at me but she quickly looks back down. I look back at the road and I feel sick, nervous, and anxious all at once. My mouth waters and my toes curl as I clear throat and compose my thoughts.

"Really, what's made you change your mind?" I ask as casual as possible. I adjust and fidget in my seat as my voice cracks. "You. I just miss you..." she mumbles and I feel a bit disheartened at this. But at least it was something. "Do you miss us?" I ask and I notice the air got thicker around us. So thick that it almost felt like I was choking. I couldn't breathe. Oh god. No.

"Look Wyatt-" I shake my head and cut her off. "No. You don't have to answer. I shouldn't have put that on you. Just know that you have all the time in the world. I-"

"Yes,  I do." She says interrupting me and I am caught off guard and don't say anything. I am leaping for joy on the inside. I was on cloud nine. I had to focus though, this was serious. "Then do you care to answer some questions for me." I ask and she sighs loudly, clearly annoyed. "You're not going to give it up even if I said no, so give me your worst." She says in clear grief and I just know she's rolling her eyes at me right now. "Why are you doing drugs?" I ask, glancing at her before making my exit. "To help with weight loss." she says in a bored flat tone and I snort at this. "You have to be f*****g kidding me Ivy. Are you actually serious?" I ask in a louder tone than I wanted and she turns, putting the bad in her lap behind her in the backseat. "I look f*****g hot don't I? So it must be working for something. Justin was right, and I feel better than ever." She says running a hand over her body and I grimace at her.

 "Stop now, you actually look sick Ivy. You're always hot to me but you look like a trainwreck. This isn't how you should be losing weight and Justin doesn't know what he's f*****g talking about." I say with a tone of disgust and she scoffs at me. "You're f*****g blind Wyatt, do you know how many people are wanting to f**k me now that I've gotten slimmer. I've f****d 27 people since we happened baby. You're just an insecure f**k head who likes to f**k fatties for some reason. You know there really must be something wrong with you in the head." She says in the bitchiest tone I think I could have ever heard. 

" Do you know why I like to f**k 'fatties' Ivy? It's because I don't look at a person's shape and size in order to determine how they would make me feel or how 'hot' society thinks they are. I look at their s*x appeal as a person. I like to please people and make people feel appreciated in every way. You may have f****d 27 people after me but please remember I wanted you before you started doing f*****g drugs and over sexualizing yourself for attention. I wanted you for you. Not this empty void of pent up emotions of bitching and whining." 

She becomes silent after I raise my voice and says, "Next question." She simply says and I adjust my grip on the steering wheel after I notice my fingers were growing white. "Why are you f*****g with a sadist?" I say with gritted teeth and scoffs at this. "I've seen the porn you do Wyatt, you know exactly why I'm doing it. It feels good. He feels good." She says and I curse as I miss a turn and continue to drive. 

"Ivy, let me make something very clear. There is a difference in teasing people for the s****l thrill and literally beating them for it. Those were gashes on your ass Ivy, not little scratches. You have bruising too, and not small ones. I saw your face when he was hitting you with that flogger, and I know what you look like when you're turned on. That wasn't lust, that was fear on your face." I say and she laughs. "As if you know what I look like in pleasure." She says and I burst out laughing. "Oh, that's rich baby, I know what makes your body tick like the back of my hand. Don't even try to say you faked anything." 

I look over at her and she crosses her arms with a devilish smirk on her face. "Oh yeah, and what if I said I did?" She says in a proud and cocky tone and I bite my bottom lip and grip the steering wheel hard with my left hand as I take my right and place it on her thigh. I start at her knee, moving from her knee up to between her thighs. I hear her breath catch in her throat and I feel her heat radiate onto my hand. I give one last grip before I let go, and I watch her squeeze her thighs together and adjust herself in her seat. "I know that it's a damn lie because your p***y always tells the truth."

She grows very silents and I knew this was the reaction I would get out of her. "Now that I have your attention, I care about you. So much, I want to earn your trust and pull you off this path you're currently on. I want you better. I want you happy. I want you in my arms. I want you in every bit of my life. I know you think I cheated but I promise I didn't, but I seriously can not tell you why I was at her house that day. I haven't thought of anyone else since the day I met you. There something about you that I fell in love with and I refuse to let it go." I say and I glance at the GPS as it says we are about twenty minutes out. I didn't expect her to say anything but God do I wish she would. 

"How dare you?" She says quietly and I glance over at her and she looks at me with glassy eyes. "How dare you lie to my face like this. What is so bad that you can't tell why you were over at Tami's HUH? Tell me, tell me, oh you can't its because there is no excuse. You f****d your forty-something old neighbor that looks like a burnt-out trophy wife on crack after you poured your heart out to me in a letter. You can say whatever you want to me, but you can not sit there and tell me you didn't cheat on me." With every sentence, her voice grows louder and louder. She had tears streaming down her face and feel my heart sink. I couldn't think. I had to tell her, no matter what she had to know. She didn't deserve this pain she was going through. She doesn't deserve to feel as though she isn't good enough.

"I didn't cheat on you." I say quietly and she scoffs and hits my arm. "Then what did you do? Huh? What can't you tell me?" She says loudly and I feel my grip on the wheel tightening in order to keep me grounded as I let everything fly.

" I killed someone Ivy." I say and I feel my heart tighten. There it was, it was big and ugly. I couldn't take it back. "I'm sorry... what?" Ivy says in a soft voice and I sigh and rub my temple. "Ivy, there is too much to tell you right now, but I promise I'll tell you tonight. Okay?" I say in as calm of a voice as possible but I felt my voice crack under my words. "Wyatt, what the hell... I-" 

"Please don't, I promise I will tell you everything, but we are 5 minutes from the hospital and I want you to be in as sound of a mind as possible when you see your father okay?" I say and grab her hand, brushing my thumb over the top of her hand. She simply nods and grows silent, looking out the window. I knew she was thinking but what gave me a small bit of hope was that she didn't pull away from my hand. She kept it undermine.