In War, There Is Love

Not a Single Doubt

Maya stood there as she watched her husband leave, in the middle of the ballroom, with every pair of eyes upon her, eyes that made her want to crawl under her skin and disappear.

She had stopped caring about what people thought of her long ago.

Or at least she thought she did. Now she could almost see them mocking her, telling her without words she would never really be their Queen.

Yet she couldn’t really blame Demetrius after what she had said to him. Perhaps for the first and last time, he had tried to be decent. To pretend he didn’t want to kill her. To pretend they were actually that kind of couple that complimented each other.

He had told her she was flawless.

Flawless! Her. If only he knew...

That was him pretending, of course.

So why had it felt like more?

Alarm bells had rang inside Maya’s head and she had done what she knew best: pushed him away.

“Maya.” Anthony took her hand in his and led her to her throne. “It’s okay.” He must have seen the look in her face because he suddenly looked worried. “I’m here.”

But Maya’s gaze wasn’t on him, however. It was on Queen Alina, who had followed Maya’s husband outside just a few minutes after, so the guests wouldn’t realize where she was going.

So, they were together? It was strange because at the dinner, she looked like she was in love with King Julian.

Alina wasn’t a woman that showed her feelings easily, just like Maya, but Maya had seen it in her eyes. The way she looked at Julian...

So why was she following Demetrius?

Either way, Maya didn’t care. At all. Not one bit. Not one teeny-tiny bit.

The feeling eating out inside her stomach? The dryness in her mouth? Nothing to do with who her husband sneaked out with to make love to.

“What happened?” Anthony brought her back to reality.

“Nothing,” Maya answered, giving nothing away. Because what was there to give away? Her husband was being strange tonight, she reminded him their enmity, he left her in the middle of them dancing.

And then his ally, a married woman, followed him outside.

To calm him down after his fight with his darling wife.

Screw him.

Maya didn’t give a damn either way.

“I really don’t understand either of you,” Anthony sighed, mostly whispering to himself. “Is it the s****l tension? You’re married, for God’s sake. Just tear each other’s clothes off already...” Maya tuned him out.

There was one good thing about sitting on a throne. She meant another, besides actually ruling your subjects. You could see everything going on in front of you.

And for some reason, Maya couldn’t stop looking at Lilith. Because there was something strange about her behaviour, but Maya just couldn’t put her finger on it.

She was dancing with one of the young Lords in Demetrius’ Council. Nothing strange about that. But it was the way Lilith’s eyes never found the Lord’s. Instead, she kept looking away, to the corner of the ballroom...

...Where the guards were.

No, not simply the guards. Her bodyguard.

Maya had seen him once or twice, following Lilith, not leaving her out of his sight.

Because that was his job. Or at least so did everybody think. But his jaw was tightened, his brows furrowed, his hands turned into fists. the world could disappear around him, all he would be able to see was the Princess.

He was jealous.

And Lilith knew.

“Are you listening to me?” Anthony demanded.

“What? Yes, of course I am.” She wasn’t. But she wasn’t going to tell him what she had just noticed either. Maya could be closer to Anthony, but she would never tell another woman’s secret.

Although it was strange that even Anthony didn’t know something was going on, considering their twin bond.

“I need to get something to drink.” She had to, if she didn’t want to keep imagining what was going on just outside the walls of this castle.

Anthony smiled. “You know you can order one of the maids, right? You’re the Queen.”

Maya furrowed her brows. He was right, of course. She just wasn’t used to it yet. Even back in her palace, she used to do everything alone.

“I know. I just want to walk.”

She took one cup of alcohol from the serving trays, and thought of joining Princess Evelyn and Queen Estelle. Just so she could grasp if they knew what was going on or not. But instead, one hand on her forearm stopped her. “Your Grace.”

Maya blinked. Queen Alina was inside already?

“Your Grace.” Maya forced a smile on her face. Instantly, she started searching through the people for her husband. And she found him easily. He was looking at them with something in his eyes she didn’t understand.

“I think we should leave the formalities, right? You can call me Alina.”

“Alright then, Alina.” Maya didn’t let her smile slip once. “Did my husband calm down? I’m sure you were of great help.”

Alina’s expression showed confusion. Like she didn’t know what Maya meant by her words. And then realization slowly slipped into her features. “You mean—oh.” And then to Maya’s surprise, she started laughing. “Trust me, I prefer them blond and wolfish. Especially when they’re my mate.” Her eyes looked behind Maya’s back, where King Julian was standing, with a cup in his hand, tall and pretty, with a golden crown on his head that matched his hair. His green eyes met Alina’s as if he could feel from miles away when she was looking at him.

A kind of connection Maya would never have with someone.

“He really is delusional, isn’t he?” Alina mumbled to herself, before placing the palm of her hand on Maya’s chest.

“What are you doing?” Maya was on the defense instantly, but Alina smiled at her, a kind of lovely smile that left Maya even more confused.

“Just confirming something.” She removed her hand then, turned her gaze at Demetrius, and nodded at him once. Just once. And Demetrius closed his eyes in defeat.

What the hell was going on?

“Alina—”

“Enjoy the rest of the night, Your Grace.”

“But—”

Alina turned to her once more. “Look under the surface, Maya. Sometimes people aren’t what they want the world to believe they are.”

Just like that, she went to her husband. Letting him wrap his arm around her waist and resting her head on his shoulder like there was nowhere in the world she would rather be.

Something clenched inside Maya’s chest.

She wasn’t a romantic. The idea of being weak, being vulnerable, showing your lowest to someone and still expecting him to love you terrified her.

But, oh, to have what they had. To know that, no matter what, you’d always have someone that’d always put you first, it was... it was...

Maya walked outside from the backdoor without throwing another glance at her husband. What would be the point?

What was even worse? If he was, or if he was not her mate?

She walked and walked through gardens and alleys until she didn’t know where she was going. It’s not like anyone would care enough to wonder where she was. Certainly, her husband would not.

Maybe Anthony?

“Maya.” The voice was so low she thought she had imagined it. “Maya.” That voice was familiar... so familiar... But he was nowhere to be seen. “Maya!”

Suddenly, he appeared in front of her.

“Nolan?!”

“Shhh.” He grabbed both her arms and dragged her behind a few trees. “You’re alive. Thank God you’re alive.”

Maya couldn’t get over her shock. She looked at him like he was a ghost that had appeared in front of her out of nowhere. “What—What the hell are you doing here, Nolan?” she whisper-yelled at him.

He took her to his body for a hug, and Maya was so shocked she couldn’t move at first.

Then she struggled to get out of his arms with everything inside her. For some reason, he repulsed her. Everyone who tried to hold her repulsed her.

Everyone but her husband, it seemed, because Demetrius had held her to his body as they had danced, possessive hands on her hips—not her waist—her hips, and she hadn’t wanted to push him away like she did to Nolan.

Her ex-lover who had apparently come here for her. Like some sort of self-proclaimed hero that was here to save the lady in distress from her evil husband.

God, how much males disappointed her.

“Stop trying to hug me!” She struggled again, finally being free from his arms. Finally being able to breathe. “I asked you a question!”

“What do you mean what the hell I am doing here? I’m here for you. I’ll get you out of here.”

Maya looked at him like he had grown another head.

“Did you think I’d leave you here with that monster?” Nolan continued, teeth gritted in anger as he rubbed her shoulders as if he could comfort her. “Has he done something to you? Has he touched you?”

“You stop touching me.” Maya snapped his arms away, looking at the confusion in his face. “What the hell were you thinking, Nolan? That we could just fly away? Just like that?”

“Yes.”

It was funny how convinced he looked. “And then what? War? Faeries dying?”

“But...” he whispered.

“Besides, did you really think I needed you to fly away from here? I am not a prisoner.” Maya couldn’t believe they were doing this. She couldn’t believe that he was really here in front of her. If any other female faerie were in her place, they would have been ecstatic. Their ex-lover risking their lives to save them.

Only that she didn’t want to be saved.

But maybe she was being too harsh on him, like she always was. “Look... thank you.” She looked him in the eye as she spoke, praying he could understand and leave before anyone could see them together. “I don’t know how you managed to sneak inside of here, but you’re risking your life for me, so thank you. But you’ve got it all wrong. I came here in free will. I’m not planning on escaping anytime soon.”

It was his turn to look at her dumbfounded. “You are surrounded by enemies. They’ll hurt you.”

“I know,” she sighed. “But it’s not your job to come here and save me. We were over before I even got married.”

Nolan ran bother his hands on his blond hair, now looking mad. “You don’t mean that.”

“I do. I told you from the very beginning. We weren’t serious. I wasn’t in love with you. I could't be.”

The look on his face was pained. “I’m f.ucking risking my life for you!”

“And I didn’t ask you to!” she snapped. “I cannot believe you know me so little to think I’d run away from my responsibilities. I’m a married woman, Nolan.” On paper, at least. But anything to get him off her back.

“I cannot believe you’re choosing him over me.”

What had she seen in him to take him as her lover? “This is pointless. I’m not coming with you, so you have to go.”

“Maya.” Now he grabbed her wrist. “You’re making a mistake. He’ll kill you.”

“Yes.” She nodded vigorously. “He will if he finds me here with you.”

“He will either way.”

For some strange reason, Maya didn’t believe that anymore.

“Probably. But I don’t want to die tonight, Nolan. So go, please.”

“Maya...” But she was walking away from him.

“For your sake and mine, Nolan, fly away before anyone finds out you are here. Save yourself.”

Just like that, she left him there, hoping that he would do as she said. And only after a few minutes after she had walked towards the castle, she stopped abruptly and thought everything through.

And you know what scared her most out of everything?

That there hadn’t been a single doubt in her mind that she would stay.