Arizonian Pride

Arizonian Pride Chapter 2

Randy took a sip of coffee from his mug as he swept dried leaves and dust off his porch. The normally simple, mindless activity for him was suddenly interrupted when he spotted a large green jeep approaching his ranch.

He put his broom down and squinted his eyes. He could make out around a handful of people riding in the jeep.

The jeep drove past his gates, causing the free-range animals on his ranch — cows, pigs, goats, unsaddled horses, chickens and some wild birds — to scatter as it drove right through their flocks or herds. It slowed down to a stop right in front of Randy's gate. A middle-aged man and woman stepped out.

"Hello, sir!" the man said. "You must be Randy McClarence. I'm guessing you must have received our email reply. So… er, as we've agreed, we'll be staying at your ranch for just a month. Just one month only! It'll past quickly, you'll see." The man smiled and put both fists on his hips.

Randy guardedly eyed the man. The woman nudged the man with her elbow.

"Oh, right! Sorry. Er, I am William Whitercoll and this is my wife, Susan. Darn, I always forget to introduce myself first when meeting new people!"

"And these are our children: Malachi, Raymond, Chelsea and Serafina," Susan gestured to her jeep, where the children still sat tightly and snugly. "Gosh, what's taking them so long?"

She walked over and peered into one of the jeep's open windows. "Kids, why aren't you coming out?"

"I can't right now, mom!" Malachi, the eldest child, complained. Randy noticed he was dressed in all-white traditional Muslim prayer clothes and has a long greyish beard. "There are pigs all over this farm!"

"This ain't a farm!" Randy grumbled.

"I hope he doesn't mean me as one of them..." William cringed as he self-consciously patted his bulging belly.

"So we've decided to sit in this jeep with him until he's not scared anymore," Serafina, the youngest child, quipped. Randy noticed she was wearing a One Direction concert t-shirt and was listening to music on her iPod.

The other two children, Raymond and Chelsea, merely put their shades on and nodded.

"I'm not scared of pigs!" Malachi denied.

"Then why won't you come out of the jeep, brother?" Serafina asked.

"Because.. well..." Malachi sighs. "I'm not scared of pigs, sis. It's just unholy in my religion to be around or near them! I can't go close to them - I don't want to," he explained to his non-Muslim family members.

"Then you and your family can turn around and leave this very moment if you like." It was Randy's turn to mutter under his breath.

"Alright, I get it," Susan nodded, understanding. "William, ask Mr. McClarence if we can park our jeep INSIDE the gates instead, away from the animals."

"Ok, honey." He turned to Randy. "Sorry, my kids - "

Randy interrupted him with a grunt and unlocked the main gate. The Whitercolls drove into a shaded spot next to Randy's vegetable garden and parked there.

One by one, all seven members, Randy counted, of his guests stepped out of the jeep, including a man around Randy's age that he hadn't noticed before. Randy guessed that he must be the grandfather of the family.

"Alright, everyone," William announced as he stretched his limbs. "Let the holiday begin!"

***

Chelsea ran down the stairs in the ranch house excitedly, her stylish leather boots thumping heavily on the wooden floor. Her blonde braided hair ruffled under her hat as she ran past the living room, where her two brothers were snoozing soundly by the fireplace.

The tomboyish cowgirl braked. She exhaled, stepped over, and began pulling one of her brothers off the couch by the arms.

"Wake up, wakeupwakeupwakeupwakeup!" she cried. "C'mon, Raymond, or you'll miss the campfire cookout and sing-along tonight!"

"Ugh! Hey!" Raymond, groaned as he fell off the couch. He got up and dusted his hands. "The cookout's fine with me, Chels. But the sing-along sounds so childish, man!" He flopped back onto the couch.

"Yeah, like, what are we, in a Western movie where everyone wearing a ten-gallon hat and shiny cowboy boots has to sing along to old Wild West songs? Sheesh! Get real, Chelsea!" Malachi backed up.

"Alright, alright," the cowgirl sighed. "You two DON'T have to join the sing-along if you don't want to. But if you don't watch out, you'll be sleeping right through the yummy, juicy, tender grills and roasts they'll serving in the cookout!" Chelsea licked and smacked her lips as she pictured herself sinking her teeth into her favourite marinated meats.

"You mean those fattening things with who-knows-how-many-calories that'll ruin my beautiful lean figure? Please, I need this to woo the girls, man!" Raymond chuckled, feeling his figure. Malachi guffawed. Chelsea rolled her eyes.

"Oh, and, they won't be serving pork or lard, would they? Otherwise, count me out," Malachi reminded her.

Chelsea folded her arms. "No pork, no lard. Promise."

"How would YOU know if you're not the one cooking, Chelsea?"

"I saw the cook, I mean, Mr. McClarence cooking! He shoved everything... what's the word? Ah! He shoved everything non-halal aside in his kitchen cupboards before he started preparing the stuff! I think he does know what you can and can't eat."

"Yeah, but it's not just non-halal stuff, though. I'm on a sugar diet, too. Nothing too sweet or creamy - this one's not about my religion, but my personal health. So - "

"He also put most of the sugar aside, too. I saw him haul two large sacks of sugar out of the kitchen and into his pantry, just next to the stables."

"Why does Mr. McClarence have a pantry OUTSIDE his house?" Raymond enquired, raising an eyebrow.

"I dunno, bruh. Pretty small house this is, anyway."

Malachi nodded as he learned this information. "Mr. McClarence really DOES care about my food intake, after all! He's a pretty ok host, even though he's, like, the only guy living out here in the plain, hot desert."

After a long pause and a quick cautious glance at a busy Randy in the kitchen, Chelsea spoke up in a soft voice. "Does he ever get lonely?"

Randy, unbeknownst to the three siblings, is not hard of hearing. He caught every word of their conversation, but chose to play dumb anyway.

Raymond suddenly sat up with a thoughtful look. "Dunno, guys," he whispered. "But to me it takes someone with a total heart of STONE to be living all alone, miles from decent human contact and civilization. How can ANYONE survive this kind of ordeal? How is it even possible to go without talking, or at least saying hi, to at least one person?" He glanced over at Randy and gestured at him. "What kind of person do you think he is?"

Malachi and Chelsea couldn't give an answer. But they, too, wondered.

Raymond looked around the living room. It was beautifully decorated with a complementary combo of Western and tribal Navajo elements. A handmade woven rug laid beneath his feet in front of the fireplace. Some pictures were hung up on the walls. Looking closer, Raymond could see Randy and his old colleagues of similar age, posing with various digging machines, tools and equipment. One elderly Native American man, who seemed to tower over the rest with his height, stood out to Raymond. Most of Randy's pictures showed himself smiling and being all jolly with this bronze-skinned person.

"I wonder who this man is?" Raymond thought to himself. But, knowing his vacation host's tendency to remain tight-lipped and dodgy of personal questions, he realised he's not going to get a direct answer.

"OH SHOOT!" Malachi suddenly cried out loud, interrupting his brother's thoughts. "I forgot to flush the toilet after using it this morning!" He jumped off the couch and raced upstairs.

Randy sighed.

***

Malachi took a deep breath as settled down into the brown leather saddle on top of his horse. It was his first ride, and he was determined to make some good memories from this trip.

His host, whom was also the head wrangler of the ranch, had not spoken a single word to him as he helped the inexperienced rider to saddle up and mount his horse. He only grunted, sighed, and mumbled some unintelligible things to himself as he made the preparations.

Once on his horse, Malachi watched as Randy opened the gates and lead his horse into the corral. Malachi had requested to ride within corral first until he's confident enough to ride outside of it.

One last check to make sure his guest will be safe throughout the activity, and Randy left him in peace. But before leaving the stables, he turned back around.

"Hey, laddie."

"Yeah?" Malachi turned back too, surprised to hear Randy speak directly to him for the first time.

"Ya gonna be ok ridin' alone n' all that?"

For a moment, Malachi wasn't sure if he had heard the question correctly. "What?"

"Ah said, are ya gonna be ok ridin' alone n' all that?" Randy repeated himself.

"Uh, oh-oh. Yeah, right. I'll be fine, Mr. McClarence. Really."

Randy nodded. "Call me Randy."

"Ok." And Malachi ushered his horse to move. It seemed a fairly manageable activity, going at a pace and speed comfortable to him. Half the time Randy's simple question just now repeated in his mind over and over again; a question that those around him seemed to have forgotten how to ask all these days......

***

"Alright, honey. Let's roll."

"Coming!"

The Whitercolls parents hopped into their rumbling jeep. Susan turned to her children.

"You kids be good, yeah? We'll be back around tea time."

"Okay," Serafina answered back.

"Sure," Chelsea nodded.

"We'll be alright here," Raymond grinned.

"And we'll wait for you," Malachi smiled.

Randy lifted up one lazy hand and waved goodbye. He watched from his porch as his two guests head out for their long leisurely drive.

With the parents out of the way, now would be the time to put those children to good use...

"Alright, listen up 'ere, you young whippersnappers! Gather 'round!"

Randy tightened his belt buckle and rolled up his sleeves. He stomped towards the children, making deep, heavy footprints in the sand with his brown leather boots. The four children gathered in front of him.

"If y'all wanna stay at mah ranch, for a month, a week, a day, or even just for an hour, y'all gotta prove me useful."

"What does that mean?" Raymond asked.

"That means... that ah've got some chores around here that need doin'. Now, other than followin' me rules I sent to yer parents in that email, ah'm also needin' a few extra hands around me ranch here to keep things going smoothly. Got it?"

"Er, sure," Chelsea replied, roughly getting the idea.

"Then you can start with the vegetables over there, in my patches." He pointed to three grown bushes lined with beautiful Harrison's Yellow blooms. "All them vegetables have been labeled. Pick only the ripe ones and leave the others alone."

"But Randy, we don't know what ripe vegetables look like," Serafina objected.

"Well, aren't you kids livin' in a digital age now? Aren't y'all supposed to be more techno-savvy than Old-Man-Randy here? Why, everything and anything's on the internet these days - all the world's information at yer fingertips, and in yer very pockets, too!"

The children nodded, knowing what they can do.

"Ah may be a lone man livin' out here all by himself, but," Randy pointed to the antennae on his roof, "does that look like ah'm completely cut off from modern civilization to you?"

"N-no, I guess," Raymond shook his head.

"Good. So you can use me internet at yer disposal to help with yer chores. But to help with me chores only! No Facebookin', textin', Tweetin', Youtubin', Tumblr-in' or anything else while doing yer chores. 'Cause if I catch ya, it won't be pretty."

" *Gulp!* "

"Understood?"

Silent nods.

"Good." Randy turned and walked away. "Then after yer vegetables, ya can collects eggs from me chicken coop over there. Just be careful. Some plucky hens don't like seeing their eggs gettin' picked. Oh, and then you can help feed me horses with the right amount of grain and wheat and stuff. I have their formulas in me stable-office. Give the right formula to the right horse or it could be fatal - not just for the horse, but for you, too, of course......!"

***

"Why does he make us do this?" Serafina huffed while picking (only ripe) vegetables and putting them into a woven basket. "What's wrong with him?"

"I dunno, sis. But he hasn't exactly been friendly to us since the moment we arrived," Raymond answered quietly.

"I know he isn't a friendly guy, guys," Chelsea reasoned, "but I understand that he needs some helping hands with these chores. I mean, we can't be eating dead leaves and dried twigs for breakfast every day!"

"I know, Chelsea," Serafina replied, "but I just wish he would be friendlier when talking to us or asking us to do things."

Malachi said nothing. His mind still circled around the brief conversation Randy had had with him before his very first horseback ride......

The four siblings went on with their chores and errands until they're all checked off their mental list. By the time they were done, it was late in the afternoon and the honk of their parents' jeep could be heard in the distance.

"Mom! Dad! They're back!" Serafina cried with joy. She dropped her (empty) bucket of horse feed and excitedly dashed to the ranch entrance.

William and Susan stepped out of their jeep to be greeted with the warm, happy hugs of their children.

"Awww, hello, hello, kids," William cooed. "Yeah, we're back."

"Where's Randy? We gotta see him."

The children, exhausted, but happily lead their parents to their host inside the ranch. Then they went upstairs to wash up and prepare for dinner.

"Hi, Randy," William sat him down. "Well, as you can see, Susan and I are back from our short joy-ride."

"Great. And you've come to pick up and take yer children and yer old man home with ya, too, ah hope!"

By now, William and Susan have learned to let Randy's sarcasm and cynicism just roll off their backs.

"Haha, that's a good one!" William laughed and pointed at Randy. " I don't know how you guessed that - you must be a mind-reader or something - but you're right. That's what I'll be doing in two weeks' time. We got a call from the government during on our ride this afternoon. They want to buy this property and the surrounding area from you, Randy. So it looks like you've gotta leave this place, too."

Susan looked alarmingly at her husband, surprised at his direct approach. They both expected Randy to instantly burst into flames and throw their whole family out of his house, but the contrary happened.

"They won't get an inch of me land if ah refuse to hand it over to 'em. No siree," Randy remarked cooly. "Don't ya folks worry 'bout me."

It took the couple about a minute to get over Randy's unexpectedly calm reply. William then raised a finger. "Uhhhhh…… aren't you gonna at least ask us when and where exactly did we get that call from? Who is it really from and what our business here really is?"

Susan gave her husband a sharp jab to the ankle, jolting him out of his trance-like shock. "OW!" William looked at Susan, then back at Randy, then at Susan, then back at Randy again.

"Er, sorry, sorry, sorry," William blushed. "I, er, was so surprised at that call, too, that for the moment I, er... I dunno. I dunno. I DON'T KNOW, OKAY? Sorry."

Randy met eyes with both his guests behaving strangely. Secretly, he DID wanted to know all about this mysterious call, but he was never one to express his curiosity openly. Secretly, also, half of him was glad that his guests can leave him in his comfortable solitude again sooner than later.

"I don't care what yer business is here. Ya already stated it in yer email - for a family vacation. But it looks like you've decided to cut it short for some reason," he spoke in a low tone.

"Alright, alright," William nodded. "S-So you get the idea. So, yeah, we're gonna have to leave this place in two weeks' time 'cause the government is coming to inspect this whole place and whatnot. And we'll have to cut our vacation short to three weeks instead of four. So we'll leave next week instead of two weeks later."

"The only problem now is how we're going to tell our kids and their grandpa," Susan sighed. A thought suddenly appeared in her mind. "Randy, have those kids been good to you and your property while we were out?"

"Oh yes. Oh yes. Very good kids, indeed, Mrs. Whitercoll," Randy replied, thinking of the good job the kids have done with the chores he gave them. "Not a window broken, not a tool damaged or missing, not a building came burning down to the ground, not a vehicle torn apart or coughing out black smoke, not a penny stolen, not a plantation wasted, not an animal killed, eaten or starved to death," he grinned. "Unless they're already cooked, of course. Very, very good children indeed."

"Uhhh... okay. That's...good." Susan didn't know whether to be proud of her children or to wince at her vacation host's attitude towards her children.

"It's too bad they have to leave so early because of the stinkin' government, no?" Randy smirked.

"Yeah, so sad," William agreed, oblivious to the obvious sarcasm this round (or was he merely playing along due to the lack of ideas on how to respond to the aforementioned sarcasm?).

"Well, then, ah guess ah won't be seeing you again, huh?" Randy asked his guests.

"Oh, I don't know, Randy. But I doubt I might be seeing this ranch in the same condition it is now in the near future."

Randy laughed, mocking his guest's doubt. "Oh, don't you worry about that, Mr. Whitercoll. I'll see to these government peeps."