Chapter 32
742 Words
32
Spending a fourth evening in a row with Xav had taught Wendy two things. Firstly, she was probably right to ask him to move in with her. But it also meant she’d somehow managed to find the police officer’s holy grail: the work-life balance.
She couldn’t remember the last time she had four relaxing evenings in a row, and certainly not in the middle of a major investigation. Right now, though, she was starting to feel as though there were other things that should come first in her life.
That wasn’t to take anything away from the victims and their families, of course. When she was in work, they came first. But she had come to terms with the fact that her working hours were just that — for working. In her own time, she had to put her happiness first.
Wendy had decided against cooking, and instead had ordered in a couple of pizzas. It was a brave move: one of their first genuine arguments had been over whether or not it was right to put pineapple on a pizza. Wendy was very much of the opinion that it was — ham and pineapple was her favourite combination. Xav, however, seemed genuinely aggrieved that anyone would even consider it. The argument had ended in laughter on both sides after Xav tried to explain his aversion to pineapple on pizzas by suggesting it might have been something to do with his European heritage. Wendy had been unable to keep herself from laughing as she pointed out that Spain and Italy weren’t exactly next-door neighbours.
She’d managed to demolish three slices — with pineapple — before she felt compelled to address the topic of Xav moving in with her.
‘I was thinking again about what we spoke about the other day,’ she said. ‘About taking things to the next stage.’
‘Yeah?’
‘Yeah. It seems a bit silly running around like teenagers, staying over at each other’s houses and nipping out in the morning. It makes sense to move things on somehow.’
Xav seemed to be considering this. ‘How do you mean?’
‘I mean… How would you like to move in with me?’
He looked at her for a moment. ‘Here?’
‘Well, yeah. This is where I live.’
‘And what would I do with my place?’
Wendy shrugged her shoulders. ‘That’s up to you. You could sell it. Rent it out. I dunno.’
‘But it’s my house, Wendy. I worked hard for it. I don’t just want to give it up.’
Wendy didn’t quite know how to respond to this. It wasn’t something she’d ever imagined Xav saying. But, as she thought about it, she realised she would probably say the same thing if the shoe was on the other foot.
‘Renting it out isn’t giving it up,’ she said.
‘No, but I don’t want to let a load of people I don’t know live in my house either. I don’t want it getting trashed. I don’t want to rent it out.’
Wendy sat for a moment before speaking.
‘I was under the impression you wanted to move things on to the next step. I’m sorry. I clearly misunderstood.’
Xav got up and went to sit next to Wendy on the sofa.
‘I do. But I just… I dunno. Selling my house or renting it out? Why does it have to be me doing that? You’ve got a house you can sell too. It’s not something I’ve ever thought about before. I just thought maybe… Well, I dunno what I thought.’
‘I get it. You’re a man and you don’t want to commit to anything.’
Xav sighed. ‘It’s not about commitment, Wendy. Why is it always me doing the running around? When we both have a free evening I come down to yours. When you want to move things to the next step it’s me selling my house and coming to live with you. It just seems a bit… one-sided.’
Wendy didn’t know what to say back to that. She could see he was right, but it wasn’t something she’d ever thought about. Was she selfish? She didn’t think so. But he had a point. Was it a sign that she didn’t actually want to commit herself? She now felt bad about making comments to him about not wanting to commit, when actually perhaps it was her who didn’t want to make the effort after all.
‘I’m just not sure how long we can keep on running around like school kids, Xav. Yeah it’s easy and convenient, but at some point we have to bite the bullet and decide which direction we’re going in. Don’t you think?’
‘Yeah, I do. But is there any rush? I mean, we need to talk about it. You’re right. But we don’t need to make any decisions now, do we? Let’s just take our time and see what happens.’
Wendy looked at him for a moment, then grudgingly nodded.
- Writer
