Breaking

Chapter 5

Vivian’s POV

It had been a whirlwind of a night. So many emotions in such a short amount of time. The pure craziness alone was enough to make Vivian nauseous but at the moment she felt so calm.

Her eyes were closed but she could feel Peter’s arms around her, his hand resting on her stomach. She could feel the rise and fall of his chest with her back and shoulders.

She could feel his warm breath hitting the top of her head. Vivian knew this was wrong, but she didn’t care.

She was just happy to be feeling safe and secure. With that realization she pressed further into Peter’s chest and slipped one leg back in between his own. With that last movement she felt something twitch near her backside, but she was already falling asleep in the safety of Peter’s embrace. Vivian took a deep breath and drifted comfortably into the best sleep she’d had in months.

The sun came up too soon. Vivian could feel it hitting her face but she didn’t want to open her eyes. She was so warm and so comfortable, she just wanted to lay there forever.

Vivian slowly turned to her other side to get her face out of the sun. As she did so, Peter, who was still asleep, pulled her closer. Vivian’s face was now nestled and resting on his chest. She could hear his heartbeat and it was so comforting.

She placed her free arm on his stomach and placed her open palm on his chest. The rhythmic beating of his heart and steady breathing lulled her back to sleep almost instantly.

After a little while longer Vivian began to stir again. She realized Peter was trying to move but she didn’t want him to. With her eyes still closed she clung to his shirt and pulled herself closer.

“Umm, Vi?” Peter quietly said. “Huh?” Vivian sleepily mumbled. “I uh, need to get to work.” Peter said hesitantly.

Memories of the previous night began flooding her mind. How she had been terrified, how she called Peter to come save her, how she recklessly had asked him to stay the night.

She bolted upright and scooted away ever so slightly. Guilt rushed into every fiber of her being. How could she have cuddled so carelessly in her marital bed, and with Peter? Rob’s best friend!

She felt as though she had betrayed Robert’s trust and she couldn’t stand it. “I’m so sorry Peter!” She stammered rushing to get out of the bed and cover herself up with a bathrobe.

Peter could sense the awkwardness building in the room and he too rushed to get out of the bed. They both stood there in awkward silence, stealing occasional glances at each other.

“Well,” Peter cleared his throat. “I’m glad you’re safe, Vivian.” Peter paused. Vivian felt a rush of pain at hearing him say her name so formally.

Peter never called her Vivian, at least not directly to her face. It was so formal and it didn’t sit well with her.

“Yes, umm, thank you for coming over and making sure I was okay.” Vivian stammered, feelings of shame, guilt, and sadness washed over her all at once.

“It really was no problem.” Peter said dutifully. “I do need to head home now so I can get ready for work though.”

“Right! Of course!” Vivian responded. “I should probably get ready for work myself.” She said, even though she knew full well that she didn’t work today.

“Right. Well, have a good day then.” Peter said clumsily and with that he grabbed his things and left the room.

Vivian stood in shocked speechlessness while she listen to Peter practically run down the stairs and out the front door.

She heard his Jeep’s engine rev and then she heard him speed away. It was silent. She could feel her heart pounding in an array of emotions as she decided to go downstairs and clean up the mess.

Peter had said something last night about a cat getting in and cussing the ruckus. She put her hands to her head. Vivian felt so embarrassed that she had caused all this drama because of a silly cat and an open window.

She slowly began picking up the pieces of broken glass. As she picked up shard after shard she began speaking aloud to Robert.

“I’m sorry Rob.” She said quietly. “I don’t know what happened. I swear I have never though of Peter in that way before and I just let my fear and loneliness overpower my rational thoughts.” She waited for a moment before continuing.

“I mean, I’ve always known Peter was attractive, but I promise I never even thought about doing anything with him, I would never hurt you in that way.” Vivian grabbed a few paper towels and began to mop up the dirt and muddy paw prints.

She wiped away more than half of the mess when she stopped and sunk down to the ground.

“Rob, you’re not here anymore.” She said painfully. “Am I supposed to be alone for the rest of my life?”

She knew that Robert would want her to be happy. He used to tease her all the time that she would remarry once he died and she would always retort that 80 year olds remarried all the time just for the s*x.

They would both chuckle at each other, never really expecting this sort of thing to happen anytime soon. Vivian sat and ponder for a few moments.

“Is it really the worst thing if I move forward with my life? Is it so terrible if that future includes Peter?” She didn’t have all the answers, or any for that matter, but at least she felt a semblance of peace.

She knew deep in her heart that Robert would be okay with her finding happiness and love again, the big question that remained was would he be okay if he knew that that person was Peter.