Art of Serendipity

45

Enough painful words for this day. I just had enough for the words at kung hindi pa ako umalis doon ay baka ano pang magawa ko kaya iiwas na lang ako, hindi ba? I did not belong there. Si Cristine pa ang gusto ng Mommy ni Levi kaysa sa akin na girlfriend. I am not important to her.

I just feel... disgraced and humiliated. Bakit kailangan pang ipamukha sa akin iyon? The truth that his mom doesn't like me is already a pain for me but showing me who she really likes for his son and I even found out that Cristine is Levi's ex, that's a different level of pain. Ang liit-liit ko sa paningin nila. Hindi man lang ako iginalang ng mom ni Levi bilang girlfriend ng anak niya. Why? Because I'm a shame? Because I'm not going to be a doctor? Ganoon ba iyon?

And what did that Cristine just said? They can get back together? Levi is still in love with her? Wow. Wow lang. F*cking in front of me, really?

I really had enough for this day. Nasira na nga ang mood ko dahil kay Tita Donna tapos dadagdag pa 'yong mommy ni Levi and why do I think that Levi's Mom's words pained me more than my brat stepmother?

I sighed heavily as I got to my hotel room. Wala na akong masyadong gamit dito pero may naiwan pa rin akong naiwan na pares ng pantulog kaya noong dumating ako ay agad akong naligo at nagbihis.

Mga mabibigat na buntong-hinga na lamang ay nailalabas ko habang nakahilata sa kama at nakatulala lang sa ceiling. I'm not crying because I don't feel like to. I just don't want to cry because once I did, baka hindi na matigil pa.

Napatayo ako nang maisip ko bigla si Levi. He might looking for me! Ano ba naman kasing pumasok sa maliit kong utak at hindi ko naalalang baka hanapin niya ako?

I reached for my phone and turned it on, na-lowbat kasi kanina. I was about to dial his number but the doorbell rang. I still dialed his number while opening the door though. Baka hotel service lang naman ito pero pagbukas ng pinto ay narinig ko rin ang pagtunog ng phone ni Levi. My phone is still on my ear and my eyes is rapidly blinking while staring at Levi. Awang ang labi ko at hindi makapaniwalang narito siya sa harap ko gayong iniisip ko pa lang siyang tawagan.

"W-what are you doing here?" I asked, still can't believe that he is here in front of my d*mn room.

Nauubos ang pasensiyang tumitig siya sa akin. He looks pissed like I did or said something horrible. Well, true enough because I really did something that he might not like. Nilayasan ko ang boyfriend ko sa party ko!

"Bakit ka pumunta rito nang hindi man lang nagsasabi sa akin? Hindi ka nagpaalam" he said in monotone.

I pursed my lips and pulled him inside the room. Medyo hinihingal pa siya dahil siguro nagmadali siyang pumunta rito. Ngayon naman, I feel so guilty.

"I'm sorry, Lev. Inantok na kasi ako along the party so I did not have a chance to tell you because you're too busy entertaining your visitors, ayaw ko sanang makaistorbo," paliwanag ko sa maliit na boses. This is still a lie. How could I tell the truth to him?

"But at least, tell me. You make me drop-dead worried, Ayannah! You're making me crazy, do you know that? I went to our Condo to check you there pero wala ka. I tried to call your phone but it's fr*aking off. What the hell are you thinking?" He said frustratedly, his eyes were bloodshot. Hindi ko inaasahan na mag-aalala siya ng ganito kalala.

"I-I'm really sorry. Na-lowbat din kasi 'yong phone ko kaya ngayon ko lang din sana naisipang tawagan ka... but it's too late because you are now here. I'm sorry for making you worry, Love..." nakatungo ko ani. "Nagmadali ka bang hanapin ako?"

"Of course..." he mumbled with great amount of restraint.

Napasinghap ako. "Did you drive fast? Pa'no kung ikaw naman 'yong napahamak, huh? You shouldn't worry about me that much, really. Baka pa ano mangyari sa 'yo," pag-aalala ko rin.

"But, Love..." lumapit siya akin at hinawakan ang baywang ko. Marahan ang boses niya ngayon ngunit rinig ang tumatakas na galit "You can't just ask me to not worry about you because this is not you. Hindi ka nag-message para sunduin kita rito so I really doubt that you would do the same in the second time so I know... I really know that you're lying. What's wrong? This isn't you. Tell me..."

This man knows how he changed me. Mas kilala niya pa ata ako kaysa sa sarili ko… na ngayon ay labis kong ikinatatakot.

"I love you..." I just said. Feeling ko iyon na lang ang kaya kong sabihin sa kaniya ngayon. I just feel so tired from everything.

Napakunot ang noo niya. "I know. I love you. Do we have a problem?"

Umiling ako at isinandal na lang ang ulo sa dibdib niya kung saan rinig ko ang t***k ng puso niya. Hindi ko alam kung dahil ba nagmamadali siya o nag-aalala siya kaya mabilis ang t***k ng puso niya... or baka dahil sa akin? You love me that much, huh, Velez?

We spent the night together in my hotel room. Umuwi lang kami nang dumating ang kinabukasan dahil may usapan kami na magdi-date ngayong araw. Simple lang naman ang date namin ngayong araw. We are just going to the University of the Philippines to stroll around. Well, U.P. is not just good for students, pwede rin kahit sino pumunta rito.

Nagdala kami ng bike papunta rito kaya nag-bike lang kami habang paikot at namamasyal sa U.P. Iniwan lang namin ang sasakyan sa parking sa may bungad.

We went to the U.P. Church first to have some prayers and then we also tried the street foods sa Maginhawa. Nag-enjoy naman si Levi ng sobra dahil bumisita kami sa Vargas Museum dito sa loob ng U.P. We also went to Cine Adarna to watch some films. Mabuti at kahit simpleng lugar lang ay nakaka-enjoy pumunta rito sa U.P. Nakapunta na rin naman ako rito noon pero matagal na iyon. This time is very memorable and happy because I'm with Levi.

Nang magdapit-hapon ay doon naman kami sa Sunflowers tumambay. It's really amusing that they plant so many sunflowers here. Naging isa na rin tuloy ito sa trademarks nila. All places here are photo worth, especially these sunflowers.

"Hay.." paghinga ko ng malalim. Inilabas ko ang phone ko para mag-picture. We took pictures together, as well.

"Picture-an kita!" I insisted. Agad namang pumwesto ang loko sa tabi ng mga sunflowers pero hindi naman siya ngumiti. Nag-fierce pa ang Velez na 'to. Pinagtitinginan tuloy siya ng mga tao, especially, the girls! Levi and his manly figure really fits for being a model too. Magkapatid talaga sila ni Laia!

Itinutok ko na ang camera ng phone ko sa kaniya at pinicturan siya. Nang matapos ay tumitig muna ako sa kaniya dahil nakahawak na siya sa mga sunflowers. I suddenly remembered the sunflower painting, my first owned painting that made by him. Sayang at nasa kwarto ko nga lang iyon sa mansyon at hindi ko ipinapakuha. Well, may plano pa naman akong bumali, sa mansyon kahit papaano, mawala lang talaga si Tita donna roon.

Lumingon siya sa akin at ngumiti. I really like his image right there. Levi, looking so adorable beside the sunflowers. Tumingala pa kami pareho nang may dumaan na eroplano. Natatawa akong lumapit sa kaniya.

Why do I feel like I want to paint him? Kaso hindi naman ako marunong kaya baka hindi ko siya ma-paint ng maayos but I want to try at least. Just this once... hindi ko na lang siguro ibibigay sa kaniya. Remembrance, maybe? For myself.

It'll be just my secret.

~~~