Touch of a Rose

Staying behind

   "Mel, hold my place I'll be right back"

    "Rose seriously, where are you trying to go now!?" her sun kissed skin shined as she turned to face me. Why is she always so dazzling?

    "Just give me a minute, I'll be right back, have I ever caused trouble before." A bubbling laugh rose from her lips.

    "Well yea, you're worse than a child sometimes. You know, I still can't believe you're already 19 years old."

    "Whatever Obaasan, I'll be right back."

    "What? Obaasan? I'm obviously too young to be a grandma" As she posed showing off her curves, we both burst with laughter. Yea this is how it should be, just like this, if only we could stay just like this. "Haiyaku imouto" as I left the line, I couldn't help but to turn and look at the back of my older sister. Had it not been for my unreasonable request she might have already been engaged to Eric by now. Instead of taking a year to study abroad with me. I guess in some sense I was glad my mother said she had to got too. I guess didn't want to be left behind.

[Obaasan: Grandmother]

[Haiyaku imouto: Hurry up little sister]

    Now where did that man go? I didn't mention the fact that I was going to find the man from earlier in order to switch tickets with him. Mel would have flipped if she found out what I was planning to do. Even still, if only by a single day, I want to push back going home as long as possible.

    Finally I spotted him not too far away sitting to the side, I bent down tapping his shoulder, "Sir, Excuse me sir!?" Startled he jumped up, scaring me in the process. 

    "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry." He kept apologizing as he picked up my dropped passport and ticket.

    "No worries I did kinda sneak up on you there." after an awkward laugh and silence he seemed to go off into his own world again. Clearing my throat I spoke, "I don't mean to pry but I overheard your conversation earlier." Slumping further into his seat he just stared forward blankly. The dark circles under his eyes and the worried wrinkles across his face made my heart go out to him. "Sir, are you OK?" Maybe this wasn't such a good idea, comforting people is not my forte.

    "I shouldn't have left," he whispered

     "Huh?"

    "I knew she was having a hard time with this pregnancy, but still I went ahead with this damn business trip. I just couldn't take it; watching her like that, just getting sicker and sicker and weaker everyday. I even told her we should just abort it and try again when she was stronger; we ended up arguing the whole night. I thought I just needed some time away, some time to clear my head, but because of my own cowardice I'm going to lose both her and the baby, and I can't even remember the last time I told her I loved her." Sitting down next to him I didn't know what to say, I had originally only come over to switch tickets for my own personal reasons, which now in the light of this man's problems seemed so trivial. After thinking for a while, I hesitatingly placed my hand on his shoulder,

    "I can't tell you everything's going to be OK" pausing I took my ticket out and placed it in his hands. "But what I can do is give you this, so that you can at least be by your wife and child's side." The gentleman's head slowly began to rise at my words; bewilderment was plastered across his face as the words I spoke began to register. Grasping my hands he shook uncontrollably.

    "Thank you, Thank you so much, you're truly heaven sent, I won't forget this, I don't know how I'll ever repay you." Smiling, I massaged my hands after his vice like grip nearly broke my slim fingers, for a second there I saw the ending of my piano studies flash before my eyes. Making our way back to the line where Mel stood, I could already imagine how she wouldn't be the slightest amused at what I was planning to do. 

    "You want to what!?" Yeah that was the reaction I thought I'd get. As I continued to try and explain the situation, she just shook her head the whole time. "Where are you going to stay, Mom will never pay for it and I certainly won't either. How are you going to get back to the airport tomorrow? Have you even thought about how inconvenienced Dad will be worrying about you?" I continued to explain how I would be staying in the man's room and that he had already called to inform them of the change. The room would remain in his name but I was going to check in for the night and leave on the flight the next day. Turning to the man Mel spoke,

     "Sir?"

     "Just call me Paul." Eyeing him disapprovingly she continued her rant,

    "Well Paul, I'm sorry my sister promised you something that I'm afraid I just can't let her do."

    "Mel!?" raising her hand she stopped me.

    "Rose I don't want to hear it, what kind of sister would I be if I just left you her in some man's hotel room all by yourself? How would I explain this to mom and dad? What would people see me as and I'm sure Eric would blame me too, if anything happened to you."

    "Mel I'm not a little kid anymore, I'm an adult!" Why was she naming all these selfish reasons?

    "Then act like one! So typical Roselyn, always trying to be the moral compass of us all. It's a good thing you want to do Rose but not this way!" As I looked at her I realized nothing I said would change her mind. My chest tightened as my eyes began to sting with the threat of tears. "I'm sorry Paul, but we just can't help you." Paul began to get a little frantic.

    "If you're worried about your sisters safety I can assure you the Resort I'm staying at is a very reputable one."

    "That's all and well but..."

    "You don't understand I need to be on this flight, I can ensure you that nothing will happen during your sister's stay, or her flight tomorrow evening."

    "I'm sorry Mr. but there's just no changing my mind, Rose lets go." Grabbing my hand she began to pull me away.

    "I won't" I could feel my throat constrict as the words quietly escaped from my lips.

    "Rose, come on we're going home."

    "I won't go" escaping her grip I stood with more courage than I actually had. By now the tears had already burst from the stronghold of my heart.

    "Rose?"

    "I can't go home with you Mel!"

    "Rose, what's the matter why can't you come home? Rose tell me what's wrong." As people began to stare, Mel's voice became soft as she held my hands in hers.

    "I can't" I can't go back to where Eric waits only for you, I just can't face him yet.

    "Oh Rose, is this about the piano school you wanted to go to?" I had all but forgotten about that failure. Unable to tell her what was truly on my heart I just shook my head yes, and cried all the more. I had failed to make it into, Cordell University of Fine arts. At the time I had become very depressed and everyone thought it was because I couldn't make it into my choice school, which was true, but that wasn't the whole truth. In fact, at around the same time Mel had been accepted into HER first choice of Medical school, John Hopkins University. Despite that, she still gave it up to take a year off and go study abroad with me like it was nothing. While I worked so hard to achieve even the smallest of goals, she would barely try and succeed in them all. Eric and Piano had been my only saving grace, my oasis in a unforgivable desert. Together they had shined light into this room of darkness I had shut myself in and thought it would stay so, how stupid of me. It wasn't until they were both taken away that I realized it wasn't a dark room but rather Mel's shadow, I truly was "Mel's little shadow". A shadow I loved and hated, despised and envied.

"Rose don't cry, there will be other opportunity's, you have great talent, you just have to show them what I have known all along, that you are an amazing young woman." Gently patting my back, Mel continued to comfort me,. Resting on her shoulder the guilt of my feelings seemed to overcome me, just how low must you cause me to sink?