MATE BY CHANCE

~NOT MATES~

~June~

It felt like I was waddling through the mud with every step I took toward Alpha Michael’s main parlor where he hosted his guest. By this time the scent was so strong I was practically eating it. Leenah on the other hand was still scratching at the surface, begging to be set free so that she could be with her mate, her actions resulted in my fangs and claws manifesting just as I crossed the threshold to the parlor. With labored breaths as I tried to calm Leenah down, my eyes narrowed to the beautiful woman from who I was dead sure the tropical scent was emanating. It took me some time to register the beautiful young woman was glued to the side of another man, a Beta if I wasn't wrong, given by the pheromones I was getting from him.

By some miracle or confusion, whatever it was, Leenah had calmed down just enough for me to decipher what was going on before me. The scent had now gotten stronger, clearly, my mate was in the room but wasn't she – he doing anything? Why was I the only one affected? I took a step closer to the duo, totally ignoring the fact that many eyes were on me. I managed to retract my fangs and claws just as the man stood and approached me and that was when the scent intensified. It was crystal clear that this man was my mate, but why did the other woman also reek of him? What was going on? My head was beginning to throb as Leenah receded further into my subconscious with a painful howl.

No … it cant be.

The rest of the pack. Or most of them had already arrived at the parlor, their presence was making me uneasy. It was like I was surrounded by shadows and thick air making it hard for me to breathe well but I steeled my stance as I prepared my heart for what I knew was inevitable.

“I am Beta Pete Rainwood, of the Crawford pack. And this is my true mate, Freya Rainwood. I am officially rejecting you as my Mate. Juniper Hazel. ” the man I thought was my mate said without batting an eye. The words had literally cut through my heart as I felt Leenah whimper in pain that only I could explain. Like magic, the dull pain in my chest morphed into unbearable pain and it took all my strength, and mostly pride to stand upright as I too had to officially ‘accept ’ the rejection. I could hear the pack mates murmuring in the background but I paid them no attention as I braced my already shattered heart to say the words I knew would only turn the pain in my heart a few notches higher but above all, I hoped it would also reflect in this man's heart if he had one. How could he be so merciless, to reject me in front of my pack and Alpha? What did I do to deserve such pain? Was I really a wilting flower? Maybe I was no longer just wilting but crushed.

Clearing my throat which for some reason felt as dry as the Sahara, I said the words, looking at this man, Pete in his dark lifeless eyes, hoping to transfer some of my pain to him as well.

“I, Juniper Hazel also reject you as my mate. ” I hoarsely rasped out the words, knowing they weren’t exactly what I was supposed to say, and turned to leave the complex, needing some space to breathe air that wasn’t polluted with the scent of a wolf that would never be mine.

I ignored the looks and sneers I got from the members I passed by the door as I went down the same steps I had taken only minutes ago, with the hopes of meeting our mate. I rushed to a nearby tree and dry heaved as my whole body felt like it was being ripped apart. So this is what a breaking bond feels like? The pain coursed through all my bones, making me sweat as I curled my body into a ball, hoping to lessen the effects of whatever was going on in my body. I tried calling on to Leenah in hopes of turning and escaping this horrible human world but all I got was silence. Was she also going through this pain? I silently thanked Celeste as the pain soon morphed into the darkness that I hurriedly and gladly embraced. Anything was better than this unbearable pain, anything at all.

I woke with a startle as cold water was splashed on my face, damn there went my moment of bliss as I coughed up the water that managed to go through my nose. Once I could use all my senses, I looked around and noticed that I was in my front yard with the Luna and the Beta’s mate looking down on me like the mutt I was to them. I looked further around, scenting the air in case the bane of my existence was still in the pack grounds and he was. The mere thought of Pete had my chest pulsing with pain. When would this torture end? I asked myself while, I slowly picked myself up from my lying position so I could at least stand and face my Luna respectfully but, my knees had other things planned as I collapsed back onto the ground.

“Aww, the poor mutt can't even stand, where is the strength you always paraded around. ” the Beta’s mate sneered while deliberately pushing me back to the ground. I literally had no strength in me to defend myself and if they were here to attack me then now would be the worst time.

“Now that you officially have no mate, we are tasked with finding you a second mate, perhaps one of the older wolves whose mates died. That way you won't disgrace our pack more than you already have. ” Luna said with so much disdain I almost cried. I did not want to be mated to some old wolf, I did not want to be mated at all, I just wanted to slowly disappear into the stars and join Celeste in her heavenly palace, far away from this nightmare that was my life.

“Clean yourself up and complete your tasks, No one has ever died from a broken heart, or whatever. Your mate's pack, oops, the Crawford Pack is very distinguished and we do not want to have a bad reputation. Just pretend like all this never happened, its not like you knew or loved each other. ” Luna finally said.

“Here, use this oil. It will block your mate's scent, so you do not embarrass us further. ” Caitlyn, the Betas mate said, throwing a small vail next to me. In my years living in this pack, I had never known why those two were so mean towards me. They had no remorse, still treating me like nothing, like I did not just get my heart, literally broken. I wanted to lash out at them but I chose to remain silent as I neither had the strength or will to deal with them, not while I couldn’t reach Leenah from within me. I dragged myself from the ground, picking up the vail as I almost crawled to my front door, wanting the comfort of my bed more than anything. Once I was within my four walls, I let my feelings pour out in tears as I mourned the loss of a mate I never knew I had. I cried out my frustrations as I remembered how unbothered Pete was when he blatantly rejected me. How could he have been so unfazed while I was barely able to compose myself?

I cried in relief as well, finally realizing that I could finally leave the pack that never made me feel wanted or welcomed, it was as if I was a wrong piece of a puzzle, not fitting anywhere. I cried out to Leenah as well who had decided to stay deeper in hiding. Once I had depleted all my tears, went to my bathroom and looked at my sorry state in the mirror, I was glad when the word ‘rejected’ wasn't plastered on my forehead, it's not like I needed it anyway, my face said it all. I reached for the scissors in my drawer and started to cut my hair short. I slowly cut my hair as I tried to remember how my father always did it for me. Maybe if my parents were alive, the pain would have been less or non-existing. When I was satisfied with my new hair length, I washed out the dye in my hair hoping to get it back to its original red color that somehow I had been made to hate.

The mini-makeover seemed to have brought Leenah back from hiding as I heard her whimper in my head.

“How do I look?” I weakly asked my wolf who just huffed in response. I sighed knowing I still had duties to perform as long as I was a part of this pack.

‘Why don’t we just leave?’ I was startled by Leenah’s voice in my head.

I wasn't totally against the idea of fleeing the pack, the only disadvantage that would have against me was that I would automatically be labeled as a rogue wolf. Generally, wolves were not supposed to live without a pack, as they have never before. I always felt like this was just a ploy to make sure a pack had members to fight for it. I did not want to test that theory no matter how compelling it felt compared to being paired up with a widowed wolf.

The crying and mini makeover had somehow managed to calm my racing heart, the pain having reduced to something more bearable, it's not like I had not been living with a constant ache in my heart since I turned sixteen. I went t my small closet and decided to look for an attire that would replace the normal ‘docile’ look I always went for whenever I was with my pack mates. Whatever made me believe that I could attract my mate if I dressed like a fairytale princess, see where that delusion led me. I finally settled for all-black attire, not to match my supposed state of heart but rather to let my hair be the main center of attraction.

My father always told me to wear my hair as a crown, I never understood what he meant but today, I hoped that my looks would divert people's attention from my situation and possibly make my ex-mate regret his choice. Maybe that was the real reason I chose to look as menacing as I could. Lastly, I discarded the oil I was given, not trusting Caitlin one bit. There was no way she wanted to help me and so I dug out a perfume my father said was my mother's actual scent. I had never used it before since I wanted to preserve her memory for as long as I could.

I opened the perfume bottle ready to spray, the moment I caught a whiff of it, I was instantly reminded of the familiar scent my father always had on him, only this time it was intense and had a calming effect on me. It was like I was in some sort of bubble where all I could breathe in was the comforting scent of wild forest flowers. I generously sprayed the perfume on all my scent nerves and looked at myself once more in the mirror, seeing the reflection of my wolf’s eyes looking back at me. I did not bother trying to smile or change my eyes back to their normal human ones, they were just going to have to deal with it. I was tired of being a version they could deal with, tonight, they would be meeting the real me.

I was finally ready to face the man that rejected me, needing to know why and when he decided I wasn't a good fit for him and his pack.

I needed closure before I left this wretched pack ... I would take my chance and be a rogue wolf if that was what it took to be free.