Shattered Illusions

CHAPTER 3

Prisca stood at the mirror in her bedroom, applying makeup with a shivering hand. She had been having imaginations of Jimmy and Hannah cuddling for the last several nights, and she had not slept at all. It was best for her to forget about it tonight.

"Where are you going?" She flinched at Zack's voice in the doorway.

Prisca spun around and tried a grin. "Going For a while. I need to shake things off"

Zack entered the room with a scowl. "Where? You seem as if you're heading to a club."

Prisca said abruptly, "Maybe I am," and grabbed her bag. "Zach, I need some leisure. I need something to happen to me.

Zack's concerned eyes widened. "Prisca, taking alcohol won't solve any issues. You are aware of that.”

"Maybe not," she said to herself as she passed him. "But it might help me forget for a while."

The club was dark and noisy, the bass hammering in Prisca's chest as she moved through the crowd. She took a seat at the bar, placed her drink order, and gulped it down. Her throat ached from the drink, but she liked the numbness it gave.

She gave the bartender back the empty glass and said, "Another."

The person sitting next to her moved closer to her seat while she waited for her drink. He was tall and well-dressed, with acute features and piercing blue eyes. With a quizzical grin on his face, he turned to face her.

A voice reached from her back "Rough night?"

Prisca looked at him for a while and shrugged. "You could say that."

“My name is Barry," he added, extending his hand.

She replied, "Prisca," and shook his hand briefly.

Barry gave a wider smile. It's good to meet you, Prisca. Do you want to have another drink?

Prisca paused, then nodded. "Sure, why not."

Barry gestured to the bartender and she was quickly given another drink. Prisca could feel the effects of the alcohol set in after taking a drink. She saw that Barry was observing her closely, and his assurance drew her in.

"So, what brings you here tonight?" Barry leaned to ask a question.

Prisca laughed bitterly. "Trying to forget someone."

"Ah, love troubles," Barry smiled ironically. "I've been there."

"Yeah?" Prisca gave an ear and arch. "And how do you deal with it?"

Barry's eyes glimmered mischievously. by not allowing it to rule me. Too little time to linger on the past.

Prisca took another sip of her drink and considered what he had said. "Maybe you're right."

Barry chuckles, "Obviously, I am." "Come on, let's dance."

Barry grabbed her hand and ushered her onto the dance floor before she could object. The lights were flashing in time with the beat of the loud music. Prisca allowed the beat to enthrall her, the alcohol numbing her grief. Barry was a fantastic dancer; when they danced together, he held her waist firmly in his hands.

For a moment, Prisca forgot about everything—her father, Jimmy, and the weight of her responsibilities. She was just a young woman dancing with a dashing stranger at a pub.

A few hours later, Prisca was laughing at one of Barry's jokes in a poorly lit section of the club. She was becoming lightheaded from the alcohol, and Barry's attraction was too much to ignore.

"You know, Prisca, you're unique," Barry said, brushing a strand of hair out of her face.

Glancing down at her drink, she flushed. "I don't think so."

Barry said, "Believe me," in a calm, honest voice. "I've met a lot of people, and you... you're special."

When he said that, Prisca's heart skipped a beat. She drew nearer until her lips nearly met his. "Thank you, Barry."

Before she could even give herself a second thought, Barry closed the distance and kissed her. Prisca quickly responded by cupping her hand over his face. The deep, passionate kiss served as a welcome distraction from her pain.

When they finally pulled apart, Barry's eyes were dark with need. All he said was, "Come with me."

Prisca hesitated a while before nodding. "Okay."

As they stumbled inside Barry's apartment, they shared a kiss and giggled. Prisca's head was swimming, everything appearing weird from the alcohol and the excitement of the night.

"Nice place," she managed to remark as Barry closed the door behind them.

Barry leaned in to give her another kiss and said, "I'm grateful." "Make yourself at home."

Prisca laughed and followed him to the couch. Their hands were probing each other's bodies as they tumbled over it. It was the first time Prisca had felt needed and wanted in a long time.

But as Barry's hands veered, a doubt flashed through her thoughts. Was this truly what she wanted? Or was she only attempting to occupy the area that Jimmy had previously occupied?

Observing her hesitation, Barry stepped back a bit and met her eyes. "Hey, you alright?"

Prisca produced a flimsy grin, nevertheless. I am OK."

Barry's face became less focused. "Prisca, I don't want to bother you in any way. If you would like, we can just talk."

Prisca was grateful for his sensitivity, but nothing was quite as scary as talking about her emotions. "No, let's just sleep instead, I feel so weak."

Barry nodded and drew her into a comforting embrace. “ok then, if that is what you want”

The next morning, Prisca awoke with a searing headache. She frowned against the sunlight coming through the curtains as Barry slept on the other side of her.

Carefully not to wake him, she eased herself out of bed and quickly set for her bag. As she turned to go, Barry moved.

He said, wiping his tears, "Prisca?"

She gritted her teeth and said, "Hey," softly. "I need to get home."

Barry was worried when he awoke. "Are you sure? You can stay for breakfast."

Prisca shook her head. "I appreciate it, but I have to leave. My father requires my presence.

Barry nodded despite his disappointment. "All right. But please be careful. If you ever need to talk or to hang out, you know where to find me."

Prisca nodded and gave him a short peck on the cheek. "Thank you, Barry. For everything."

Zack noticed Prisca's fearful expression as soon as she opened the door when she got home.

"Where the hell have you been?" Zack inquired, looking both relieved and furious.

Prisca passed him with a frown. "Outside."

"Out where?" Zack followed her into the kitchen. You did not make it home last night. I was sick and nervous."

Exhausted, Prisca raised her gaze to his. "All right, I visited a club. I just needed to let some anger out."

Zack winked at her. "And are you fine now? Or did you just make things worse?"

Prisca lost her temper. "Zack, you're not understanding. You don't know what it's like to feel trapped or like you are being drowned."

Zack's anger subsided, replaced with a shrewd glance. “As it is, I don't. However, I know that drinking and going out won't solve the problem. It won't make the pain go away."

Prisca's shoulders slumped and she relinquished the effort. "I know. However, at this time, it's the only thing that makes me feel alive."

Zack leaned forward and put his hand on her shoulder. "Prisca, you need to become more adept at healthy coping techniques. For the benefit of you and Dad alike."

Prisca nodded, tears welling up in her eyes. "I just don't know how Zack. I'm lost."

Zack drew her into an embrace and spoke quietly. "Okay, let's resolve this together. You are not alone in this.

Despite Zack's support, Prisca kept sinking further and deeper into hopelessness. Her nights were even more lonely as she spent them at bars and engaging in inebriated conversations. She was with Barry a lot, looking to him for comfort, but it was just temporary comfort that could not mend her broken heart.

One particularly trying evening, Prisca stumbled home. She saw her father sitting in his favorite chair, looking frailer than ever. The sight of him sent a wave of regret through her.

She knelt beside him and said, "Dad," "I'm sorry."

Her father offered her a meek smile and patted her hair. "Hold on, Prisca. You're undoubtedly giving your all.

Prisca shook her head, tears streaming down her cheeks. "No, I'm not. I'm going crazy and I don't know how to stop."

Her father reached over and clasped her hand in an incredibly tight grip. Prisca, you have to be strong. For us both. You have my trust.

Prisca nodded, thinking that power would come from his words. "I'll do everything I can, Dad. I promise."

The next day, Prisca decided to begin the process of reclaiming her life. She became a member of a support group for people dealing with family illnesses in an attempt to get guidance and inspiration from others. Though she was anxious about the first meeting, she was determined to go through with it.