The Biker in Lace

Chapter 10.

*_ the history_*

There was another side to the hazel eyed, dark haired Josh Michaels then the one his friends and family knew later in life. As a young boy he was given everything and he never seemed to have done a thing wrong. He was selfish and self-centred as money could and did get him out of anything he was responsible for. As years past Joshua learned to be kind, loving and understanding to those he loved, but an unforgiving, cruel and calculating way stayed behind for those that wronged him. He was still self-righteous and never let anyone explain their side of what happened. He became heartless at times when crossed and as trustworthy and honest he was to his friends and family, he was as unreliable and shifty to the ones he hated.

Amelia had alluring emerald green eyes and blond hair. She was as beautiful and energetic as she was full of life and free spirited. She was open and had an inviting personality. She was caring and selfless. They were the exact opposites in personality, but fit together as one. She was a beacon of hope that someone like Joshua can find love and he learned from her to be to be the man that Lacy, Bradley and Josh knew and loved. She calmed him since the first moment he laid eyes on her at the wedding of his friend, Ethan.

Joshua was only truly happy when he was near Amelia when they first met. She was the only one that could compose him when he was furious or made him see reason when he was blinded by his self-righteousness. The one downfall in their love was his jealousy towards other men, especially their friend Ethan Cole. Amelia tried her best to keep the peace, but how do you avoid one of your best friends’ husband. He would curse at her and call her a liar when she tried to explain that she was only friendly to Ethan for her friend’s sake. Joshua once again did not listen to reason.

Amelia fell pregnant with Clive when they were only dating for a few months. Never did Joshua propose or even hinted in the direction of marriage. The reason why Joshua never proposed was a mystery to everyone, they seemed so happy and perfect for each other, but Joshua never took the responsibility towards Amelia. Amelia new about Joshua’s jealousy towards other men and thought it would change when Clive was born. Instead of the jealousy easing up, Joshua became jealous of his own son and the attention Amelia gave to him. He would ignore Clive and spend less and less time with them. Joshua changed into the old selfish and egotistical man he was before.

Five years went by and still Amelia stayed by Joshua’s side and with time Joshua accepted the fact that he was wrong. Amelia got pregnant again and this time Joshua was there every step of the way. He accompanied her to every doctor’s visit and even went along for the entire baby shopping spree. They were happy again and Amelia thought she finally got her happy ending. It was even the time that Joshua finally changed into the man Josh knew as his father. The kind, loving and trustworthy one took over from the unhappy, wicked and selfish one. Joshua started to spent more time with Clive and learnt to love him and accepted the shared attention, but it all changed again like the flip of a switch the day Josh was born.

Josh was born on the twenty second of June at 08:32 am. Joshua was there through the whole twelve hour delivery and even cut the umbilical cord. He was ecstatic and vowed to be the best father he could be to his two sons. He gave Josh his first bath and changed his first diaper. He was loving, caring and kind to Amelia and wanted her to rest as much as possible, but it all changed the moment he returned from the florist with a bouquet of her favourite flowers.

The sun was shining brightly through the big windows of the hospital room where Amelia was sitting looking as beautiful as ever. Her blond hair was glowing in the yellow hue the sun reflected into the snow white room. Blue balloons floating in air, announcing the arrival of the baby boy conceived out of love and received with joy. She was the perfect picture of happiness and pride. The small smile on her lips captured Joshua in a trance where he stood outside the room looking through the glass window at his beloved. The ring in his pocket a token of his everlasting love, He could not wait to give it to her.

After the picture was edged into his mind for safe keeping he pulled himself together and took the step towards his future. The squeak of the door silencing the person talking in a hushed voice near the crib of the baby, his finger stilled on the baby’s cheek. The joy on Amelia’s face stilled as she watched Joshua halt in the doorway, her once peaceful, joyous look replaced with fear. Joshua’s face was edged in anger and rage as he wordlessly stepped inside the room, the flowers he held in his hand fell silently to the ground, his steps dedicated and steady as he walks to the baby inside the crib. Wordlessly he gently took the baby and rested him on his chest, before he spoke with conviction and utter rage. “You will never see him again. Your bastard child and you are dead to me from this day on. My son will never know you or that child of yours. If you try to contact us I will ruin you and you know I can.” His words were directed to Amelia, his voice cruel and cold. Amelia cried out to him as he walked out of the room leaving her and Ethan behind ignoring the sobs jerking through Amelia’s body.

With a paralysing shock she watched as the man she loved stormed out of the room. At first Amelia did everything she could to find Joshua, but Joshua disappeared that night without a word to anyone not even his friends or family knew where he went. When Josh was three days old Joshua sent Amelia papers to render all parental rights to him, she refused, but Joshua blackmailed her with unknown leverage and she gave in, her secret too big to reveal. Never again did he spoke about Clive or Amelia to anyone and he never told Josh more than necessary about his mother. Joshua never did listen to reason from anyone or any explanations as to why Ethan was at the hospital that day. He made his own assumptions and the dormant jealousy won over all reason. Joshua convinced himself that he was blinded by her beauty and that she deceived him into falling for her using the excuse that she was pregnant with his child.

For years Amelia pinned over her stolen son and became a mere shadow of the woman she was. The liveliness in her eyes faded into a dull shadow turning the once emerald green eyes into a moss like dullness. She did not return to the person she once was as she became an empty shell and ghostlike shadow of a human being. Even though it got better with time Amelia never forgot her son she would always celebrate his birthdays and some nights she cried herself to sleep even though years passed. She hated Joshua for what he did and vowed to one day see her son again. She made Ethan promise to bring her son to her someday as he and his wife was the only place she had left to go. The night when Joshua was presumed murdered, he finally decided to listen to what happened the day at the hospital.

Ethan sat beside his wife’s hospital bed like numerous times before, praying that the chemotherapy would work this time when news of Josh’s birth came. His wife was excited to see the new born baby and begged for Ethan to take her to see her friend. She was weak and Ethan wanted her to rest, but she was adamant about seeing her friend that day. When Joshua returned he did not see Sam sitting in the wheelchair next to Amelia’s bed. He could only see Ethan with his son. A look of glee and affection spread across Ethan’s face when he looked in Amelia’s direction and saw the joy in his ailing wife’s eyes. Joshua only saw him look in her direction and not the person his eyes were locked with. That night before Joshua disappeared with the promise to bring Josh to Amelia, Joshua had to learn that he was the only one standing in his own way of love. He deprived himself from the love of his life, another son and the son he loved the most, from his mother, all because he acted out of jealousy. Joshua made a decision that night that forever would break the bond he had with his son and once again he disappeared for no one to find.

Joshua spread lies about Ethan and the Beastly’s so he could feel better about his actions and make it seem plausible for the friendship they once had to be demolished. He never had any deal with Ethan, but made arrangements for certain things to fall into place so it would seem like the truth. He asked for money from Amelia to see Josh as he never had the intention to let Josh know about his mother’s existence. He did not fore see Ethan giving her the money. That night he made it look like he was going to see Ethan about the deal he wanted to refuse and then when Ethan gave him the money he asked for, he paid some people to help him disappear and make it look suspicious and frame Ethan for his murder. Shame caused him to do this as he felt that he could not look his son in the eyes after all the lies and the ignorant way he acted years ago. To Joshua this was all about himself again and how he felt and what he wanted and just like when he was younger he tried to sweep his mistake under a rug and hope no one was the wiser.

*_*

*_ back to present_*

Josh sits silently as Mr. Cavanagh tells him about his mother and brother and the memories he had of them. He described how his father loved his mother with all his being and what joy she gave him in the beginning. He then described the way her personality was and how she was loved by everyone that knew her. After that he came to the sad part where Amelia was never seen again a few days after Josh was born and how Joshua told them that Amelia will not be mentioned again in his presence or to Josh when he was older. He wanted nothing to do with her again and never explained himself, he only asked that his friends would respect his wishes and sadly they did even when it was the hardest thing to do.

A rollercoaster of emotions grips Josh’s insides as he processes each word, but still the true reason for his father’s actions was not revealed. He only knew that he did have a brother and that his mother was Mrs. Cavanagh friend and so were Ethan’s wife and Ethan was a friend of his father before he was born. He also knows that after his birth his father never mentioned Ethan in a friendly way again and that he was never seen near him again till the night he was presumed murdered. Josh sits quietly as Mr. Cavanagh stands from his chair and walks to his side.

“You know son, we may never know why your father did what he did, but we can always choose what we want to do about it. I know Mrs. Cavanagh still keeps in touch with your mother if you want to talk to her.” Mr. Cavanagh pats Josh on his shoulder as to show his support. He knows that it could not be easy for the young man to find out that he was deceived by the one person he trusted with everything.

Mr. Cavanagh recalls all the times he begged Joshua to listen to reason and let Amelia back into her son’s life, but Joshua never gave in or wanted to listen. He was really stubborn and pig-headed at times. Mr. Cavanagh had no idea of what his friend did after he spoke with Ethan and Amelia the night he disappeared, until the morning Judge Jones phoned about the marriage between Lacy and Bradley. He only knew that Joshua’s bike was found at the bottom of a cliff, his body now where to be seen and that all suspicion of foul play was leading back to Ethan. He wished his friend would have listened to reason and talked to his son before all this happened. He did not know about his will and testament or that he faked his own death and now he had to tell this boy in front of him about that as well. This was already a lot to take in and one can only take this much before the straw breaks. He can only pray that Josh will be strong enough for the news he had to tell him next.

“Son, there is something else I have to tell you.” Mr. Cavanagh begins and Josh can tell that what he will hear next will probably be worst then what he had to hear already. “Your father had a clause in his will and testament that we had to honour. Bradley’s father tried to get it scraped from the will, but since his father gave the permission it was legal. The will stated that Bradley has to marry Amy Cole if he is not married by the time the will is read which will be the end of next week. That is why we married Lacy to Bradley this morning.” Mr. Cavanagh takes a deep breath before he looks down at Josh to see if he has processed the information he was just given. “The second part to this is that there is a possibility that your father was not murdered.”

“What?” Josh asks baffled as he shoots up from his chair.

“We cannot proof it yet, but we received information that your father faked his death and is now in hiding. That is all I know, but I feel that you have the right to know this.” Mr. Cavanagh tries to explain this complicated situation to an already overwhelmed Josh. “Until we find your father or the truth to what happened to him, we have to have the reading of his will and testament and everything in it needs to be adhered to.”

“But why?” Josh asks as his face tells the story of the confusion that runs through his brain. “Clive said that my mother wanted us to meet the night that my father died and that there was no deal about drugs. Do you think he told the truth and that that is why my father would do this?” Josh paces the floor deep in thought.

“The night he died he called me and rambled about how he was childish and impulsive the day he send your mother away. He said he felt sorry for what he did and ashamed of the way he acted and if he did fake his own death, I would think that it may have something to do with that. He did not elaborate and I did not ask him what happened as he said he will see me the following day. As I said we do not know if your father is still alive or not, but I do hope that you will find it in yourself to forgive your father and us for honouring his wishes. I hope that when you speak to my wife she can tell you more of your mother and hopefully you can meet her soon.” Mr. Cavanagh leaves the room as Josh nods his head as to indicate that he would want to speak to Mrs. Cavanagh. Silence fills the air as Josh takes a seat and ponders on the information he just received. Everything Mr. Cavanagh told him was basically what Clive said and Mr. Cavanagh will not lie to him. He never did and although he kept his father’s demand he cannot find it in himself to be angry at any of them. He does not know how to feel towards his father at this moment or if he is still alive or not. All he knows is that he feels lost.

As a few questions did get answered a few new ones made their way into his brain. Why did the friendship between Ethan and his father turn sour? Why did his father feel so strongly about him never meeting his mother and why did he not take Clive as well? Why would his father demand money from Ethan? What will his mother expect from him when she meets him? Does he want to meet her? What happened the day his father send his mother away? Why did Clive only find him now after a year of his father’s passing? Why would his father hate Ethan so much that he would frame him for his murder? The questions keeps running around in Josh’s head, making him feel dizzy. His emotions are a mess and vary from one to the other in a flash. He feels cheated and at times he feels broken like a lost child not knowing where he belongs. He does not know what to think of his father anymore as it feels like he never knew him at this point.

Mrs. Cavanagh could not give Josh the answer that he wanted the most: Why did his mother not come back for him? She could however tell him more about her. She told him how much she loved him from the day she found out she was pregnant with him and how she could not wait to hold him in her arms. She showed him a picture from when Amelia was heavily pregnant with Josh while a small Clive stood at her legs smiling brightly at the camera. She showed him a few more of his mother and her as well as some where it was just Amelia. Some of them had her helping out at the soup kitchen and some were taken secretly, but something that stood out in all of them was her ever present smile. Mrs. Cavanagh told him how nothing could ever bring her down and how she always found a way to smile no matter what.

She told him about how he actually met his mother once when he was eight and she took him with her and the twins to a park near their home. She recalled how Amelia had tears glistening in her eyes as she looked at her son with love and adoration while she handed him the ball he kicked in her way. That was the last time Amelia and Mrs. Cavanagh met up at the park as Amelia felt that she could not be just a stranger to her own flesh and blood anymore as it was getting harder not to tell him who she really is.

She told him that since his first birthday Amelia send Josh birthday gifts, which Mrs. Cavanagh gave him and pretended that it was from her as she knew Joshua would stop all contact she had with Amelia if he found out. On his sixteenth birthday Amelia send the last present with a special request. She went to the safe and got the gift from it as she held it out to him his hands shook while he lifted them to take the precious gift.

“She asked me to keep this for you until I was able to tell you about her.” Mrs. Cavanagh’s soft voice flowed over Josh as the tenderness nestled in his heart. Josh takes the gift wordlessly as he does not know what to say. He is afraid that the words that is milling around in his mind would ruin the peaceful and loving atmosphere that surrounds them. His fingers are still trembling as he stares at the medium sized box in his hand. “I can give you some privacy if you need it.”

“I don’t know if I should open it.” His voice came out a little hoarse as his eyes stayed on the present.

“That is for you to decide, my dear. I know that this should be hard to for you, but I also know that it was just as hard for her. She never told me why she let Joshua take you and she never returned, but whatever happened had to be significant.” Mrs. Cavanagh folds her hand around Josh’s trembling hand as he picks at the tape that holds the paper together. “I believe you met your brother?” She changes the topic.

“Yeah, I have. I left after he told me though.” Josh says sadly as he lifts his eyes to Mrs. Cavanagh’s. “He said he will take me to my mother.”

“That will be wonderful.” She smiles encouragingly, but something tells her that Josh is still a bit reluctant to meet his mother. “She is the only one that will be able to answer your questions.”

“I know.” He huffs as he rakes his free hand through his hair. “I just don’t know what to do and where to go from here. Everything I knew feels like a lie.”

“I can understand that. Whatever you feel comfortable with will be the best and only you can decide what you want to do. This was a horrible thing your father did, Josh, but I don’t think he meant to hurt you. I think he wanted to protect you from whatever he used against your mother.” Mrs. Cavanagh tries to encourage him although she feels helpless herself.

“I should go back to the rally.” Josh says flatly even though he feels drained he knows his friends would be worried if he did not return.

“No, you are staying right here and I do not want any excuses. There is no way you will go back tonight.” Mrs. Cavanagh strongly disagrees. “Lacy and Bradley knows you are here so they know you will be fine. Go take a shower and have some sleep and then tomorrow you would be able to think about this more clearly.” She smiled at him again as her eyes lingered on him lovingly. Josh was like her son and she felt deeply for him and the situation Joshua left him in. She wishes she could take all this away from him and make this easier for him, but she knew she couldn’t.

Josh nods his head as what she said made sense. He does feel too tired to ride his motorcycle and his brain feels too groggy from all the information he tries to process. “Thank you.” He whispers barely audible as Mrs. Cavanagh stands to leave.

“We love you son.” She says before exiting the room and leaving Josh to his own thoughts. She went in search for Mary when she walks into Mr. Cavanagh.

“Is he okay?” Mr. Cavanagh asks his wife as he looks at her lovingly.

“He will be fine. He is a strong man.” She sighs as she walks into her husband’s arms for a tight hug. “What was Joshua thinking?” She murmurs softly into his chest.

“I wish I knew.” Mr. Cavanagh sighs as he rests his head on top of his wife’s. “There is something else I need to tell you.”

Mr. Cavanagh took his wife to their room and sat her down on their bed before he told her about the clause in Joshua’s will and testament. Mrs. Cavanagh felt sick in the pit of her stomach as she listened to her husband’s words. For the second time in her life she hated Joshua Michaels and this time she did not know if she would be able to forgive him. Mr. Cavanagh left out the part about Joshua probably faking his death as he knew his wife had to live through a lot today.

*_*

“Hey.” Mary says as she enters the study. “My dad said you are staying tonight.” She stated as she self-consciously pushes a strand of her dark hair behind her ear, her bright blue eyes cautiously on Josh as he sits in the chair where Mrs. Cavanagh left him.

“Yeah, your mom does not want me to ride back to the rally tonight.” His voice sounds weak as his fingers still pick at the tape on the gift.

“Are you okay?” She moves closer to the barely recognisable Josh. She recognised his bike earlier rather than him when he arrived and even more so now with his shoulders hunched over and his face emotionless.

“Surprisingly I am.” He says as he stands from the chair, coming to a standstill in front of her the present tightly held between his hands.

“You look so different.” Mary observes as she takes a piece of the oily hair between her fingers and letting it drop again as she folds her arms around herself.

“Yeah, someone told me you would like it.” He teases as he thinks back to Lacy’s words earlier that day. It is hard to think that in less than twenty four hours his life changed tremendously. He now has a brother he did not know of for twenty six years and a mother her may or may not meet in the future. His friends were forced into a marriage because of his dad and he honestly does not know if his father is still alive or not. Everything was now one big mess and his father sat in the centre of it all.

“Well, I do have a soft spot for bad boys.” She teases as she looks up into his eyes. ”But, I like the old you better.” Her voice is soft and husky as if she struggled to speak.

“You like me?” The old Josh was starting to show again as he takes a strand of Mary’s hair and pushes it behind her ear then his hand softly falls on her cheek as he searches her eyes for any indication that this might make her feel uncomfortable.

“Smooth, Josh, real smooth.” She laughs as she slaps his chest lightly and she shyly drops her eyes to the space between them. She feels an instant coldness fill the space where his hand was as Josh drops his hand from her cheek and steps back until could lean against the desk. Placing the gift next to him he folds his hands over his chest as he crosses his ankles.

“I wanted to ask you something.” He starts as he looks at her with a frown. “I know you like Bradley for…”

“Liked.” She interjected as she takes a step closer to Josh as her eyes search his. Seeing his frown deepens she continues. “I liked Bradley as in not anymore.”

Josh nods as he stands from the desk and takes a few steps towards Mary. “So, can I kiss you then?” He asks as he stands a step away from her. She nods slightly as they both close the distance. His hands find the nape of her neck, pulling her closer until their lips connects in a slow, but searing kiss.