The Biker in Lace

Chapter 12.

Lacy’s head felt like it was going to explode by the time they found Clive. When Bradley left she told Josh and Amy that she did not want to hear anything. She wanted to figure it out by herself before she could give answers to their questions. She did not know how to react to what happened so she pretended that it did not happen, but only if her brain got the memo she would have been fine.

Clive sits at the bar waiting for Ethan to instruct him of his duties at the rally today. As a member of the Beastly’s it’s his duty to help with some of the tasks like bartending or hosting some of the games. With everything that happened the previous night and not knowing how Josh would react he isn’t really in a good mood this morning and to pretend to be friendly is just not something he wants to do.

“Clive?” Amy calls as they enter the bar, immediately concern enters her voice as she assume Clive is drinking again and so early in the morning.

“Don’t worry Amy. It’s clean water.” He says knowing exactly what she was thinking. Even though he would have preferred a beer, he promised Ethan that he would not drink while on duty. He too is looking more civilized this morning. His hair is clean and neatly tied with three ties. His torn, rugged jeans are clean and black t-shirt is covered with his jean colours. The lines of a very drunken sleepless night are the only flaw on his handsome face, his eyes a deep moss green. “Josh, Lacy.” He greets, his eyes only lingering a few seconds on Lacy, before he turns back to Amy.

“Josh wanted to speak to you.” She says encouragingly, she knows how hard this is on them both. She really hopes that they can get to know each other. Amelia deserves happiness and Clive had a rough time growing up without a father and not knowing what happened to his baby brother he only got to see once.

“Yes, I want to meet my mother.” Josh says straight to the point. He does not see the need for unnecessary chit chat, he is eager to meet the woman he feels so drawn to after reading her letters. He did not yet know how he feels towards Clive or how their relationship will turn out, but he did know that it will all be sorted out in time.

“So, you believe me then?” Clive asks relieved that Josh does not doubt him. A part of him was afraid that Josh will send his mother away just like Joshua did.

“I went to Mr. Cavanagh last night and since I know they will never lead me astray I have no doubt that you are my brother and can take me to my mother.” Josh says honestly. Unsure as to how to react he stands with his arms crossed and feet apart, his eyes never leaving Clive.

“I’ll take you to her, but I first need to speak to Ethan.” Clive says with a small smile. Seeing the frown on Josh’s face he realises that Josh might think Ethan is still hiding something so he quickly explains: “He has some duties for me to do at the games, but I’m sure he will give me some time to take you to mom.” Excitement seeps through his voice as his mood starts to lighten up a bit. His mother will finally get back her second born.

“You can go.” Ethan’s voice startles them as he steps into view. He heard everything, but did not let the group of people see him as he first wanted to hear what Josh had decided. “I’ll look after it.” He felt happiness in his heart that his friend will finally be able to meet her son.

“Thanks, boss.” Clive says jumping up from his chair, excited to make his mother’s day.

*_*

Nervously Josh sits on his bike, his arms supported on his helmet in front of him on the petrol tank of his bike. Silently he just sits there staring at the house in front of them. ‘My mother is inside this house.’ He thinks over and over. Silently the rest of the group sit and wait for Josh to make the first move. Lacy and Bradley is avoiding each other again, but they both sit on each side of Josh giving him the moral support he needs. Clive and Amy steps out of the SUV, Clive used the previous day when they went to the mall. The sound of the door closing breaks through the atmosphere, pulling Josh from his thoughts. “Are you coming?” Clive asks as he approaches the garden gate, smiling brightly at his nervous brother. He has not made eye contact with Lacy yet this morning or spoken to her at all, it was safe to say he was avoiding her too.

Lacy pretends to not be bothered by any of them as she was here for Josh like she reminds herself frequently and that is all that matters to her. Josh gives a nervous sigh as he climbs from his bike. “This is harder than I thought.” He says quietly so his friends are the only ones to hear, his heart racing inside his chest.

“We are here for you, bud.” Bradley says also swinging his leg over his bike to follow Clive and Amy.

Silently Lacy follows suite. Amy is walking behind the boys, waiting for Lacy to catch up. “Are you okay?” she asks when they are out of earshot from the boys.

Lacy just nods distracted as she suddenly comes to a halt. The double story house in front of her is breath-taking with its luscious garden and an enormous terrace facing the garden gate. The green leaves of the bougainvillea tree creeping up the side of the house, is a vivid contrast to the bright white wall. The railing of the terrace is overgrown with tendrils of blood red roses. Balconies in front of big glass doors indicate the bedrooms on the top floor. A beautiful blond woman sits at the table on the terrace drinking her morning tea, while reading a book. The birds chirping in the big oak tree gives the tranquil feel to the atmosphere. “It’s amazing.” Lacy gasps. The big hedges they walked through seconds ago obscures the view of this wanderlust garden, enclosing this piece of heaven away from the hustle and bustle of the streets outside.

“You should see the back yard. Amelia has a real green thumb.” Amy says with a loving smile as she looks at the woman sitting at the table. Amelia is the only mother she ever knew as her own died when she was very young.

“You are very close to her, aren’t you?” Lacy asks when she sees the way Amy looks at Amelia. Reminding her of how Josh looks at her own mother.

“She is the only mother I ever knew.” Amy says as she starts to walk again. “Come on, I want to see her reaction when she sees him.” Amy leaves Lacy with a new question, making her look at Amy in a questioning way before she starts to follow her. Where is Amy’s mother?

Just as the three young men takes the first step of the terrace, the sound of glass shuttering breaks through the tranquil chirping of the nearby birds. “Josh.” Amelia gasps immediately recognising her son. He has the same green eyes that she has and a mix of her blond and his father’s dark brown hair. He looks just like his father did when he was younger except for those two things. She always wondered how he would grow up to look like and here he is standing on her terrace. Never did she imagine that she would recognise her son instantly or that he would resemble his father so much.

Silent tears started to wet her cheeks as she stares at Josh without another word, both of them too afraid to breathe and unsure of what to do next. How does one react meeting your mother for the first time? The scraping of Amelia’s chair is the only sound that could be heard over the chirping of the birds. With trembling limbs Amelia takes small unsure steps towards Josh. Josh in return stands frozen on the spot, his heart beating a million beats per second. With eyes roaming over his mother’s face Josh takes in every detail, seeing a few familiar trades from the photo’s he saw the night before as he watches her approach. The four bystanders keep their distance as they realise the importance of this moment between the two people in front of them. “I have your eyes.” Josh declares when Amelia comes to a halt in front of him, her emerald green eyes pinning his.

“Oh, my son. How I longed for this day.” Amelia says her voice trembling with nervousness and emotion, stretching out her hands towards Josh. “May I?” Unsure how he would react she hesitates for a second, but just enough for Josh to notice before he nods his approval. His throat feels too tight to talk. Trying to set her at ease he takes a step closer to her, he knows how nervous she should be as he feels the exact same way. Taking her hands in his he pulls her closer giving her a tight hug. For minutes they stand embracing each other while Amelia cries tears of joy and gratefulness. There was no dry eye in sight as mother and son stands holding each other close. Even Bradley had to blink away a few tears, but he was too late as Lacy saw them glistening in his eyes.

After a little while of mother and son hugging, the six of them sit down around the big table where Amelia sat when they first arrived. Josh took his mother’s hand in his and refused to let it go. The instant he took her hands in his he felt a connection to her like he never had before. He felt like someone coming home after a long time. Amelia kept thanking Clive and Amy for bringing her son back to her, to which the two could only respond with even bigger smiles then the once they already had.

“You must have so many questions.” Amelia says while tenderly looking at her son. She knew Joshua well enough to know that he would have never spoke about her or where she was. Joshua had a mean and stubborn streak to him when he felt he was wronged.

“I have a few, but I read your letters and Lacy’s parents told me most of it last night. I got some of the answers in them and if it wasn’t for Mr. and Mrs. Cavanagh, I would not have been here today.” Josh confesses. “I’m sorry, I never knew about you…” Josh’s voice brakes, but he disguises is as a cough. No matter how hard this is or how emotional he feels he will not give into his emotions.

“Oh, my dear. It was never your fault. I should have never let Joshua blackmailed me in giving you up.” Amelia immediately saw the blame that Josh took to himself and felt the need to ensure him that it was not his fault. If anyone is to blame it would be Joshua for his selfish and inconsiderable act. “For so long I felt that I deserved what happened, but Joshua was the one in the wrong here. It took me a long time to realise it and since the day I finally accepted it, I started to try and convince Joshua to let me see you, but he ignored my every try.” She confesses with pain edged on her face. “Clive was the one that kept me strong and encouraged me to keep trying.” The small smile on her face burns a bright picture in Josh’s mind as he saves it as the way he would always remember her.

“Mom, why did Joshua take Josh away?” Clive asks the one question that is on everyone’s mind.

“That is one of the answers I would like to know.” Josh confesses, looking at his mother for answers. Seeing that the answer was hard for Amelia to give, he slightly squeezes her hand as a means of encouragement. Clive sits on the other side of his mother, taking her hand he smiled at her. He wanted to feel at ease when she was ready to answer them. Silence fell around them as everyone waited on the edge of their seats until Amelia was ready to speak again.

“You both deserve the whole truth and I am the only one that can tell it to you.” She starts taking a deep breath. “Joshua was a very jealous man and for years he thought that Ethan and I had an affair, which was not the truth. Joshua even accused me of trying to trick him into marriage by getting pregnant with Clive, but as you know we never got married. Joshua accused me of lying and that Ethan is the father of Clive, who he wasn’t and we proofed with DNA tests. Joshua was jealous of the attention I had to give Clive and he never had the bond towards him as a father. He ignored Clive for the most part and after a few years it started to get better. Our relationship had return to what it was before Clive was born and Joshua started to accept Clive as his son.” Amelia took a deep breath as she tries to calm her nerves before she continues. “Although he still did not trust me around Ethan. He never believed me when I tried to explain that Sam was my best friend and that I hardly ever had anything to do with Ethan. Sam was like a sister to me and I chose Joshua over our friendship. I believed that Joshua loved me and wanted the best for me. I distanced myself from Sam and believed it was for the best.” A lone tear rolls down her face as she thinks back to the guilt she felt for choosing a man over her friend. If only she knew that Joshua’s love was never strong enough to outlast a friendship.

“The day of Clive’s birth Sam sneaked into the hospital to come and meet my new born son. She was so excited and elated when she held him in her arms. She could not wait to have a child of her own. Joshua never knew that Sam came that day. Two years before I got pregnant with Josh, Sam came to the hospital where I worked for a check-up.” The tears now run freely from Amelia’s eyes as she remembers her once best friend. Amy too had tears in her eyes as she listened to Amelia, even though she never really knew her mother she felt close to her thanks to Amelia keeping her memory alive. “That day my heart broke as my best friend received the unexpected news that she would never be able to have children. I could not comfort her or cry with her, it was unprofessional and I was just the assisting nurse at that moment. After my shift I went to her room again, I wanted her to know that she was still my best friend and I would do anything to help her get through this. So I stayed the night holding my friend in my arms so she could cry away the sorrow she felt.” Amelia could feel her two son’s eye’s still holding her captive as she takes a few deep breaths. “Joshua was away for business for a few months and Lacy’s mother convinced me to stay with Sam as she would keep Clive with them until I returned.”

“Sam had cervical cancer and had to have her hysterectomy. I knew that my relationship with Joshua was nearing its end. I planned to end it when Joshua returned and made a decision to help my friends in the only way I knew was possible. I offered to become a surrogate mother so my friend could have the one thing she wanted the most in life. I kept it secret from Joshua as I knew he would once again accuse me of an affair with Ethan. Sam had eggs frozen before the operation and I was willing to carry her baby for her. I went on hormone treatments and did everything they asked me to. The first treatment got cancelled when Sam got really sick from the chemo therapy she had. Joshua returned and was a different person. He treated me with respect and finally started to accept Clive as his own. He asked for my forgiveness and I decided to give our relationship one last try. Then I learned that I was pregnant with Josh. Sam was so happy for me and the day Josh was born she wanted to meet him even though she just had another strong dose of chemo.” A sad smile made its way to her lips as she remembers the look on Sam’s face when she looked at Josh and Ethan.

“She begged Ethan to take her to see me and when they came to my room Joshua just left to go to the cafeteria. He was so happy and loving towards me and Clive and could not wait for the day that Josh was to be born. He watched Josh with an eagle eye and he confessed to me that he felt remorse for the way he treated Clive all those years in the beginning. Ethan stood at Josh’s crib when Joshua returned and I could see the love and adoration he had for Sam when he looked at her while he held Josh’s little hand. I could see the longing in my friend’s eyes to have a child of her own as she looked at Ethan. Josh did not see Sam at the other side of my bed as the door to my room hid her from view and I presume he thought that Ethan was there to see me once again and the jealousy took a hold of him once again. Joshua did not wait for explanations and as he stormed over to the crib he refused to look my way. Ethan tried to stop him, but he was stopped in his tracks as Sam fainted in her wheelchair next to me. She had to be rushed back to her room and I was still numb from the spinal injection they gave me. They kept me in hospital for a few days and Ethan ensured me that he would do everything to find you. The day Joshua’s lawyer came with the papers I knew he meant every word. I did not want to sign the papers, but Joshua sent me a letter in case I refused.” Silently Amelia stands from her chair. “I’ll be right back.” She says before disappearing into the house. The five young people looks to each other confused, while silently awaiting her return. No one wants to break the silence so they just keep their thoughts to themselves. Minutes later Amelia takes her seat between her sons again. An old yellowish envelope crumpled in her hands.

“He sent me this.” Amelia breaks the silence again giving the letter to Josh, letting him open it to read the contents himself. She wanted him to know she had no choice and that if she did she would never have let any of this happen. A horrified look spread across Josh’s face as he read the letter. He never thought his father could be so cruel and mean to another person especially someone he claimed to love. With trembling hands he closes the letter and gave it back to Amelia. The rage he feels towards his father at this moment prominently displayed on his face.

“How could he?” Josh hisses as he stands from his chair. His hands resting on his head he starts to pace the terrace. Lacy’s hand shoots out from beside her grabbing a hold of Clive’s arm, when she notices Clive opening his mouth to say something. Shaking her head in a negative way she indicates that this would not be a good time for him to say something. Looking from her to Bradley who also shakes his head negatively, he closes his mouth and sits back in his chair. His mother silently squeezes his hand as she gives him a reassuring smile, while handing him the letter.

‘If you refuse to sign the papers I will make sure that you will lose not only one son, but both.

I know about the fertility centre and the efforts you’ve put in to bare Ethan’s child.

I will make sure that everyone knows about your affair with a married man while I was away and his wife is dying. I will make sure Judge Jones Snr. would declare you an unfit mother.

You know I don’t make idle threats.’

Sighing Clive drops the letter on the table. He feels sorry for his mother for what she had to go through. “I wish I knew what to say.” He says quietly so only she could hear. Giving him a sad smile, she squeezes his arm again before focussing on a still pacing Josh. Clive cannot help but to feel grateful that his mother did not decide to fight Joshua, because he could never imagine a life without her.

“I thought I knew my own father and now I learn that I did not know him at all.” Josh says as he comes to a halt in front of the table. “I am sorry for what he did, mother.” The word feels odd on his lips as he speaks, but realisation hits harder when he sees the happy gleam in Amelia’s eyes when she hears the one word she always wanted to hear from her lost son. How could one do this to the people he proclaim to love?