Secrets and Scandals

Chapter Five

The fall leaves fell beautifully and swirled around us as I stood facing James wearing a flowing white dress. A dress that Amy had insisted was perfect for me.

James wore an expressionless look on his gorgeous face and I also felt nothing inside of me.

I had reminded myself over and over again earlier that morning about my reasons for going ahead with such a life-changing decision.

I anticipated the empty feeling in my chest, so I needed something to hold onto when things got bleak and uncomfortable.

For a moment, I turned to the people seated in white chairs, all of whom were strangers to me. Amy had the widest grin on her face and the most excited countenance as everyone else. It still did not matter to me how she felt. I was not moved. I was mostly glad that she was okay.

She had been in and out of the hospital for weeks and each time she returned, she acted like nothing happened. For reasons unknown to me, I was never allowed to visit her and no explanation was given to me for her sudden disappearance.

James held my hand and slid the ring onto my finger smoothly. I took his hand and did the same, trembling.

“By the power vested in me, I now pronounce you husband and wife,” the priest said, smiling sweetly at us.

There was applause and, at the same time, a sting in my eyes that caused me to tear up. Some would have thought they were tears of joy.

“You may kiss the bride.”

James came closer to me slowly and wrapped his arms around my slender waist. He leaned in and softly, he pressed his lips on mine. I could not help but feel warm inside. It would have been a perfect kiss if any of it was real.

He took my hand and led me down the aisle, waving at everyone. They cheered at us with sweet words.

Amid the applause, my eyes met with Claire. She had a cold look on her face that sent shivers down my spine. I did not have the time or the energy to think too long about it so I ignored her.

The sound of the applause faded, and I was now seated at the reception, listening to Jack give a heartfelt speech about love and his personal experiences of his marriage to Janette.

“Without love, we are nothing,” he concluded, and kissed Janette, who was standing right beside him.

The sound of soft orchestral music filled the room once more. I felt James grip my hand underneath the table.

He leaned to me and said, “May I have this dance, Mrs Wilson?”

Mrs Wilson.

The thought of it made me quiver.

I nodded in response and we took the stage. He twirled me in his arms and held me close, too close.

We let the rhythm of the soft and delicate piano music control our movements. Everything and everyone dissolved around us.

His hold on me made me stop thinking about my father for just a moment. I hated the fact that he had been alone all this time, but I convinced myself that it was for the greater good.

“I hate you! You're so selfish..."

The sound of a high-pitched voice brought me back to this world. Claire had poured her drink on the gentleman I assumed was her date, then stormed out of the hall right after. He followed behind her with clenched fists, moments after recovering from the shock.

I looked up to see James' reaction to the scenery, but he wore a straight face. He slipped his hand down to my fingers and interlocked them with his.

“Let's get out of here," he said in a deep voice.

We slipped out of the hall unnoticed, since everyone was distracted by the scene. I followed him as he led me out into the garden, then past it to a part of the compound I had not been to.

There was a lake and a cabin in the distance down the path. The sky was dark and clouds gathered slowly.

As we walked side by side, I kept wondering how my life would be from that moment. I hadn't thought that far before and now that it was on my mind, I didn't know what to expect or imagine.

We got to the lake and sat at the wooden docks with our legs swinging just above the surface of the water.

“Are you afraid?" he asked, looking straight ahead to the horizon. Drops of light rain had begun to pour, creating little rings as they hit the lake.

I nodded when he looked at me to get a response.

"Don't be. I want you to feel safe..with me.”

“It is a little hard to be,” I whispered, my voice slightly breaking.

“Why, Alyssa?”

I could not say another word. The look in my eyes gave me away, and he knew exactly what I meant.

For a second, I saw regret in his eyes, but it vanished too quickly.

“I’m sorry.”

My eyes were wet. I was on the verge of bursting into tears and losing my composure after enduring for the past few days leading to the wedding. But, I didn't cry. I laid my head on his shoulder instead and made a wish.

Deep down I wanted to trust him. This is my world now. At least for the next two years.

I just wanted to know why he was doing any of this.

“Shall we dance?" he asked after moments of silence.

Before I answered, he got up and stretched out his hand to me. When I took it he pulled me up into his arms and held me close.

The light rain continued to fall, but we ignored the drops of rain that hit our skin and basked in each other’s presence.

We swayed side to side to the rhythm we must have memorized from the party. I couldn't help but wonder what he was thinking.

Especially what he thought about me.

It was clear to me that he was a gentleman. So, I convinced myself that the way he treated me was nothing special.

Plus, I did not want to get carried away. I definitely could not handle another romantic disaster.

Yet, I could not deny how I felt about him.

Uncontrollable feelings surged through my body as the rain poured a little more now. His grip tightened on my back, so I looked up to him. His hair was drenched and drops of rain rolled down his beautiful face.

I drew in a sharp breath when he leaned in.

My eyes begged.

Kiss me, James.