Planet Lara: Tempest

3. Iceberg, Right Ahead

Three

Iceberg, Right Ahead

Humboldt knows the drill. We do our business, then we get a treat. I try to drag him down the hall toward the kitchen where he would usually be snorting and pawing at his snack drawer; instead, he’s hopping and whining at the glass, his tail whipping like he’s preparing meringue for the queen.

“You’re a traitor,” I mumble, releasing his collar, though I doubt he hears me over his pitiful fussing. I retreat to my office just as Finan enters the building and crouches to be smothered in frothy, excited kisses from the world’s worst dog.

I close my office door behind me, but I’m not petty enough to lock it. And when Finan passes by with Humboldt at his heels, my heart pounds so hard, my hands go cold.

Fine. Ignore me. Probably for the best, anyway.

I nudge my computer awake and open Lutris. I have work to do. Like write and send an email about the council vacancies. Shaky hands flattened on the desktop, I close my eyes and breathe deeply for a few seconds to get myself together. I cannot allow Finan Rowleigh to have this kind of power over me. We’re colleagues. Coworkers. Nothing more.

Liar.

Shut up.

My office door opens without even a warning knock. Humboldt pushes past, a soup bone hanging from his mouth. “Ew, are you kidding me? He’s going to get that everywhere!”

Finan steps in and quickly rolls up the small area rug where Humboldt prefers to eat his treats. “I’ll wash the floor when he’s done.”

“Whatever.”

“May I sit?”

“Finan, I have a lot to do. Are you here to stay or to clean out your office?”

He perches on the couch edge—not quite committing to staying, but not leaving either. “I’m back.”

“Great. I’m sure you have a million things to handle. Joey’s been filling in for you, so head out to farm B and get up to speed.”

“I’ve stayed in touch with Joey. I’m up to speed.”

“Good. We also had a town hall meeting this morning, and we’re going to fill the vacant council seats. That’s what I’m doing right now, so if you’ll get to work—”

“Stop. Please. Can we press pause for a second?”

I turn in my chair, arms crossed like they’re battle armor to protect me—to protect my heart underneath. “It’s fine, Finan. You made yourself perfectly clear the last time we spoke. I’m not some insecure prom queen who needs reassurance that you still think she’s pretty. We have a ton to do, so if you’d kindly get to it, I can cancel my request for HR to start looking for your replacement.”

His face hardens. “My replacement?”

“As the project administrator for Thalia Island, I have taken on the jobs of four different people in the last two weeks. I didn’t know if you were coming back, since you’ve not communicated that intent to me, so yes, I’ve emailed Human Resources.” I cross my fingers under my elbow so he won’t see that I’m lying.

“Is this how it’s going to be from now on?” Finan’s jaw clenches.

“How else do you want it, Finan? I don’t want to give you any further opportunity to be disappointed in or disgusted by me.” The sting from the night of my ill-advised slideshow wherein I exposed Kelly and her band of idiots rushes back; it takes everything I have to keep my emotions in check. I don’t want him to know how much I regret it, how embarrassed I am, how, in hindsight, I know what I did was stupid and wrong.

“I was hoping we’d be able to talk about it.”

“And that’s why you took off with nothing but a note and a pickle plate left on my porch? That’s why you didn’t call or text me, even though you were able to stay in touch with Joey? Doesn’t sound like you were much interested in talking.”

“This is bigger than a text conversation.”

“So silence is better?”

He stares down at his boots and runs a hand through his hair, over his beard. Both are longer than usual. He doesn’t look himself.

“Catrina told me about your sister’s babies. I hope they’re OK.”

His head bobs once. “A boy and a girl. Rowan and Ivy. They’re doing great. Just tiny,” he says, and then abruptly stands. “I’ll be in my office for the next hour answering emails. When I head out to the farm, I can take Humboldt with me.”

I look over at my dog, enamored with his icky, sticky soup bone. “I’m sure he’d love that.”

Finan leaves my office without another word, clicking the door closed behind him.

And my heart crumbles into a thousand icy chunks at my feet.