Leaving.

892 Words
Clarissa POV As I make my way back to orphanage while struggling to contain the pain of rejection coursing through my very soul. I groan out barely managing to stop the painful howl that threatens to leave my throat causing my wolf to whimper. Emerald remains quiet and doesn’t even dare to move for fear of making me lose control to her, I also know she’s trying to take as much of the pain as possible. This will help us get to away from prying eyes and into the safety of the room without falling apart in public and causing a scene. As I stand before the two storey building that has housed me in this pack for the past decade I feel a bitter taste in my mouth. The thought of leaving it behind me feels and sounds refreshing. The orphanage may be an old crumbling building but it’s the one place that has provided shelter for me. I roam my eyes over the old European building, taking in the magnificence it once held as a pack house with over fifty rooms. It's big enough to accommodate every orphaned/found pups in the pack just like they found me or I did find them. Twenty rooms house the young pups on the ground floor to avoid mishaps while the second floor had twenty eight rooms for the teenagers who haven’t shifted yet. I live on the second floor and the only difference between me and the others who have lived here over the past decade is the fact that eventually, everyone shifts and leaves while I don't. Either to mate, join the warrior training, get adopted or just move to another pack while I still remain the pathetic human among wolves. I never made friends all this years with anyone at all, having a target on my back was one thing that I never wanted to get any more innocent lives involved. I also knew I’d be leaving one day to never come back and aside that, who wanted to be friends with the pack’s human? I look towards the small herbal garden our matron Mrs. Monica planted to use for herbal treatment whenever the younger pups got hurt or fell ill. She had taken care of me for the first six months I was found and placed in her care, nursing me back to health. That was the first time I felt cared for since my parent’s untimely brutal demise. Mrs. Monica is currently in her sixties, she is strict with tiny brown eyes, extremely big b***s, tiny b**t and stands at the height of 6’7. Ironically her wolf is a small brown one. I walk through the door and groan feeling a searing pain in my chest. I manage to climb the numerous stairs and make it back to my small room on the second floor while grabbing the wall for support to avoid falling on the ground and breaking down in tears. I grab the small old duffel bag that I got last year from the annual ‘hand me downs’ event where the pack members gather yearly and supply it for us at the orphanage. The Luna had started it the second year after I arrived. I pack some clothes, my natural black soap and an old pair of snickers I got two years ago. I walk to the middle of the room and remove the third tile on the floor using my claws and grab the stainless case that has my dress that I wore before the attack back then. It was personally designed and made by my mother as my birthday gift with a fair of soft pale blue shoes made from cotton materials. The case also contained the miniature version of our last family portrait that I had remade myself using the art supplies at the academy, a sketch of each of my parents and a painting that had all three of us in wolf form lying on the grass at my mother’s garden. I rummage through the case and finally spot the it, the key to access all that I’ll probably ever need to survive out there from here onward. I close the case and put it into the duffel bag and my stomach growls reminding me that I need food and fire to erase all evidence of my existence in this pack. I tiptoe to the kitchen at the matron’s quarters praying she’s already left for supervision at the pack house while sniffing for confirmation. I grab the two sandwiches at the kitchen island, three apples and a match box. I run to her little office and grab a map of the region and sprint back to the room and stuff everything inside. I light a match and drop it on the old blanket spread on the cot before jumping out the window shifting midair. I land on the ground steadily and look back to the window before bolting for the trees. ‘Hey Em, do you think we’ll find the royal pack papa spoke of? He did say all the answers are there’ I confide in my wolf. ‘We have no choice, we have to find them no matter how long and hard it’ll take’ she replies. ‘Alright girl, we’ll do that once we confirm it's safe’ I replied her.
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