Ultima Trials

Better For You

Camden’s POV

For the first time in seven years, I had a room to myself. The cottage I lived in was nothing more than a giant room with a kitchen and a bathroom that was covered by a sheet I found in the trash at the packhouse. For the first few weeks, I lived on scraps from the packhouse, and thankfully, Jeri and Gloria had thought to stockpile formula and donated breast milk before Jeri died. Then the doctor snuck me formula after Mav ran out before Noah killed him too. After Mav’s first birthday was about the time Gloria started to give us wolfsbane to keep Noah from killing us, so my hunting was done with a bow and arrow that I had hidden deep in the woods behind the cottage. It was right on the border of the territory as not many wolves went out there. Noah wouldn’t allow anyone but his ranked members or selected warriors anywhere near my cottage. Easier to keep people from questioning. Gloria only stayed near me because Noah was terrified of her. As he should have been.

I stared around the room. It was nice, kind of reminded me of when I lived with my parents. I didn’t do anything special to my room, since I spent most of my time going to different packs for trainings. Or I stayed up with my Beta and Gamma. Since they died, my days were spent cleaning bathrooms with toothbrushes, and nights were spent taking care of Mav. Once he was asleep, I would go hunting for dinner for the next night. I had built a pile of shredded blankets as a mattress so that Mav could have a bed. He looked so small in the full-sized bed, and most nights I would end up sleeping in the bed with him just to keep him safe.

The bed was much softer than the one I had used at home. Too soft. So, I pulled the blankets off and laid them on the floor. Shockingly it was still more comfortable than the ‘mattress’ I had grown accustomed to sleeping on. Finding the bathroom wasn’t difficult, and Alpha Hayden told me that no one used the bedroom next to this one, so I climbed into the tub and tried to sleep.

The first dream was the night where Mav and I had to hide in the bathroom of Gloria’s cabin. For hours I heard the warriors looking for me. I heard the doubts and the questions, but none of them would bring it up to Noah himself. It was best for everyone if we all just followed whatever he said. I knew he had to have done some shady s**t to get the Alpha power, the ability to force everyone to submit, but Gloria refused to tell me what it was. I had my own assumptions, but I knew better than to ask Gloria. She would never tell me and now she couldn’t.

I wanted to ask the Alpha if I could read the letter, but I didn’t want to overstep. Things were different now. I would have to unlearn all the things I learned over the last four years.

It also threw me that Hayden was my mate. I never thought I’d live long enough to have a second chance, and never thought she’d be the Alpha of an incredible pack. I remembered her brother, but from what I knew, he died when he shifted at sixteen. I was there and so was Hunter, but I never had time to interact with Hayden, not that I would have. I was so in love with Jeri that any other female wasn’t worth a second looking at her. My eyes were solely on my mate. At the time, I thought we’d spend the rest of our lives together.

When I found out she had died… I wanted to join her, but Mav needed me.

Goddess, I missed my son. The room felt too empty without him, and my body was so used to producing enough body heat to warm us both, but without him I was too hot. I decided to take a cold shower to cool off, but after my shower I was wide awake. Doing what I knew how to do, I grabbed a toothbrush and got to scrubbing. This bathroom was much smaller than any of the ones at Silver Star. It took me under thirty minutes to get the bathroom done. It was clean enough to lick, just like Noah liked it. I went back to my room and cleaned the room. There wasn’t a speck of dust on the surfaces of the room. I moved on to the other bedrooms and bathrooms. I noticed the sun rising just as I made it to the Gamma’s side of the floor. He stood watching me from the doorway as I finished the first bedroom.

“Never thought I’d see the great Camden Tarain cleaning bathrooms.” He sighed and shook his head.

I just shrugged.

“And so submissive.” He growled. “What the f**k did that asshole do to you?”

I looked down and shook my head, “I’m not the same man you knew during training, Bentley. My mate and my parents are dead, my pack is run by a psychopath. I did what I had to do to stay alive, for my son. I’m all he has left.”

Bentley wasn’t the same straggly teenage boy either. He had grown a lot. When I first met him, he was 6’0 and maybe 150 pounds of skin and bones. He was a ‘runt’, basically meaning he was the smallest pup out of his siblings and boy did he have a lot. I think his parents had a pup for 16 years straight. Not that it was a bad thing. The Black Storm pack was incredibly well off, but the Betas were the bread winners of the pack. They came from some park in Europe and when they immigrated from wherever, they brought money and loads of it, then those loads turned into heaps and from there who really knew.

Now that Bentley had completed his shift, he was 6’8 and easily almost 300 pounds. He wasn’t a runt anymore and I would like to see someone call him that.

“Is that a toothbrush?” He growled out again.

I nodded.

He grunted and motioned for me to follow him. I shoved the toothbrush in my pocket and followed. He led me to the dining room and shoved me into a chair. A few she-wolves brought plates out and I could hear the giggles from the kitchen. I had always heard that I was a ladies’ man, but I was already so in love with Jeri that I didn’t take my mind of her. She was my life. Now our son is. That was all I needed to focus on.

It wasn’t long into breakfast that Alpha Hayden came down. She wore a pale pink floral blouse and tight dark blue jeans with black high heels.

Beautiful. Mate is beautiful. Jersey panted as we looked at our mate.

I couldn’t deny that she was absolutely beautiful. Her honey-colored hair was curled perfectly and hung down her back. She wore a locket; I noticed it the night before. Her deep caramel eyes scanned the room, a smile plastered on her face, but I could see the deep-rooted pain in her eyes. The same look I saw every time I looked in the mirror. The feeling of loss, knowing that no matter how much you hope and pray, that person will never come back.

Hayden walked towards us, stopping to say hello to her pack members. I could understand why she was so respected. Alphas were supposed to lead the pack, but Mom said the only way you can lead is if you know the people you’re leading. She was a great Luna. She could tell you the name of every pup in the pack, how old they were and they were there for most of their births. She took the most hands-on approach to being a Luna she possibly could.

I didn’t notice that Hayden had finally come to us until I heard her “How did you sleep? Was the room okay?”

I looked up at her, “It was good. Just big. And empty.”

“I found him up at the crack of dawn cleaning my bathrooms with a toothbrush.” Bentley said. “That fucker had an Alpha cleaning bathrooms with a goddamned toothbrush.” I could tell he was getting pissed, so was I.

I had hoped he would keep it between the two of us, but he had a duty to his Alpha. It was his duty to report any ill treatment of any pack members, not just his own.

Hayden looked down at me with a growl deep in her chest, “A toothbrush? First, we have a staff for that. They get paid quite well for their job and they can ask for a change any time they would like. Secondly, if you feel the need to clean bathrooms, ask Diane, our head of staff, for the cleaning supplies. You’re a person, not a slave. Finally, I’m pretty sure I told you to get some sleep.”

I wanted to roll my eyes, but the past four years have taught me to stay silent if I want to live. Though this wasn’t Noah. She wouldn’t force lashings on me because of my inability to submit. Torture was different than submission. I didn’t submit to Noah; I simply did whatever I could do to survive. He thought it was submission, but it was fear. Fear for my son.

“I apologize, Alpha. I’ll be sure to find Ms. Diane for the cleaning supplies.” I spoke as softly as I could to hide my irritation. “Would it be possible to go see Mav now? I don’t want him to wake up and me not be there.”

“Eat and then we can go.” Hayden sat down and was immediately served her breakfast.

The table chattered about random things, as it was Sunday there were no trainings, which was how the Beta was able to catch me cleaning the bathrooms in the first place. There was a huge BBQ planned for the night. One of the members had found their mate and they all celebrated together. I couldn’t remember the last time I was at a mating ceremony. It was like a wedding for werewolves. Once we found our mate, that was the end of it. We didn’t look further, because in most cases, when one half of the mated pair dies, the other follows soon after. Second chances only come after being rejected and the person who made the rejection would never be blessed with a second chance, so they would have to take a chosen mate. That bond was strong, but not as strong as the one blessed to us by the Goddess herself.

I can still remember my mating ceremony perfectly. Jeri wore a beautiful light golden ball gown dress, and I wore a black tux that I had bought especially for that night. It was now nothing but ash. Noah had burned most of my things while I was in a coma and what little I did have Gloria had rounded up from the Elders.

It was those thoughts that kept me from wanting another mate. I could still remember my first time so clearly. She would have known what to do. We would have left, and she would have a plan for raising Mav. I would be an omega in a different pack rather than a slave in the only home I ever knew, but none of it would have mattered if I still had her. But she was gone, and I was given Hayden. She deserved so much more than the man I was. I was nothing, empty. My only reason for being was lying in a hospital bed alone, and sick. His little immune system couldn’t fight off the cold and damp cottage while also fighting wolfsbane and silver. He deserved better than the life I could give him.

“Are you ready?” Alpha Hayden asked.

I hadn’t noticed that the dining room had mostly cleared except the table I sat at, and all eyes were on me.

“Uhm, what?”

“Are you ready to go see your son?” She asked again.

I nodded.

We walked in silence to the hospital, but I could tell that she was mind-linking with someone the entire walk. I remembered how busy I was constantly even with Jeri and Betas and Gammas. I couldn’t imagine doing it alone. I never took Jeri for granted. I showed how much I loved and appreciated her as often as possible. Even if that meant I took over her duties while doing mine.

“Here, I need to talk to Doc for a bit. Have the nurse come get me when you’re done.” Hayden said, leaving me in the doorway of Mav’s room.

“Actually, would it be okay if I stayed here instead? No disrespect to the Gamma or you, Alpha, but I have spent most of every night with Mav since I was able to take him home. I don’t sleep well without knowing he’s near.”

“I told you he’s perfectly safe here, but I understand. I was that way when Hunter was first in his coma. I don’t think I slept in my bed for weeks after.”

I tilted my head at her, but something inside the room shifted and I turned to see my son’s big brown eyes looking back at me. He gave a weak smile before his eyes fluttered close again. My body reacted on instinct, and I wrapped him in my arms. Jersey howled in excitement that our pup was still alive. He had scary wires and tubes coming from various parts of his tiny body. That was another. He thought that something was wrong. He didn’t grow. Though he was almost four, he still had the body of his two-year-old self. He was shorter than the other pups I saw running around the packhouse and so much thinner. Gloria always said that it was because of how we lived, but I wasn’t dumb. I always made sure he had a healthy eating style and exercised regularly. I knew Gloria would never let him just watch TV, she was very strict on education.

I whispered in his ear about the room, and the bed we were going to be staying in. I told him that no matter what happened I was there, and I loved him with all my heart, because I did.

“Maybe we can talk to the Alpha here and ask if you can go to school. I know how much you loved reading with Grandma Gloria. You can make friends, and Daddy will become a warrior. I’ll be better for you, Maverick. I promise.”

“But you’re the best Daddy in the whole world already.” He mumbled before going back to sleep.