An Illicit Love

Chapter 12

Yet, a day later, Catie found herself a bundle of nerves and stress. Something had changed. Where before had been uncapped happiness and positivity about herself and Dave, she now had to admit that it seemed she had been wrong. Catie went to gym after work, and during her workout, she kept tabs on who was entering and leaving. Dave did not appear, and neither had he made any reference to seeing her there, or meeting after work. He had not been rude, but aloof and out of reach. She had tried in a few ways to gauge his mood at work, but he had evaded her eyes and there had been no messages amongst the work she received back from him. It was almost month end and Catie and Dave had discussed never letting what was happening between them have any impact on their jobs, which they both needed. Maybe Ross had been unpleasant or something else had happened so affect Dave’s behaviour. Catie decided to see if things were back to normal the next day. At home, as usual, she fell into the role she had always fulfilled. Mother and wife.

But the next day, continued in the same fashion. Dave – polite but aloof. And there was no way she was going to push for an answer at work, so she waited for the expected message to arrange to meet after work. But this did not materialise. That night, lay awake, worry gnawing at her insides. Something was wrong. Something had changed. So soon, she asked herself for the hundredth time? Dave had scarcely greeted her civilly at work. His eyes, usually so warm and intimate when they managed to glance at each other when passing at work, had been distant and cold. Impersonal. had wracked her brains trying to think what she could possibly have done wrong. Had she said something wrong? After a few hours of tossing and turning eventually fell asleep, but her sleep was not deep and relaxing, she hovered in a semi conscious state and felt like a sleepwalker when she got up the next day.

Catie went through her morning routine on autopilot, her mind busy thinking of ways to broach the subject with Dave when she had a chance. The third day of no communication and she was already frantic. This made Catie realise how deeply she was involved, even without having taken the final, longed for step in their relationship. What if he said that it had been nice while it lasted but it was over? What if her mentioning her upcoming holiday had made him change his mind about her? Just the thought sent a shiver of apprehension down her back. They had never made any commitment regarding time, so how could she question if it had been a short lived fling? Dividing her thoughts between Bryan’s incessant chatter before she dropped him off, and her ever panicky thoughts, Catie at last arrived at work. In time to see Dave’s back as he entered through the kitchen door. Was she glad for the reprieve that was granted by him not seeing her arrive? Or did the delay in confirming his demeanour ratchet her stress up a notch or two?

Catie struggled through the first half of the morning with no opportunity arising to address the matter with Dave. But it was a half morning filled with mistakes and little concentration. She found herself having to redo half of the work she was busy with. After retyping a document three times, which she could usually type in her sleep, Catie decided to take the bull by the horns and broach the subject with Dave. She could not see herself being productive in any way or form until she did.