The Death Kingdom

Chapter Three

Fynn flips me over and I tumble onto my back with a groan.

"You're not focusing," he says as he circles around my body, staring down at me.

"I didn't get much sleep last night," I mumble, briefly closing my eyes.

He reaches out a hand and I clasp it, letting him pull me back onto my feet.

"Have you thought about our conversation?" he inquires with a slight frown on his face.

"It's all I've been thinking about."

"And?" he prompts.

"And I've gotten nowhere." I place my hands on my lower back and arch backward, trying to give my straining muscles some relief. I have not been on my game this morning and I'm paying for it dearly.

"You still have time. Now focus. I've never been able to best you like this," he scolds, waving a hand vaguely in my direction.

It's true. Out of the three of us in our squad, I'm the best in combat. It's something that comes naturally to me. Ever since I was young I've always been stronger and faster than the other kids. I continuously astounded my parents with my quick reflexes and agility. They used to constantly say I was gifted, but it's never felt like there's anything special inside of me. I've just always been like this, at least for as long as I can remember.

"I've just been going easy on you." I give him a playful grin, waiting for him to take the bait.

We've been sparring for an hour now. It's our daily routine and normally Akita is with us but Atwood has her doing a check-in with the watch right now.

Fynn folds forward in a mock bow and in the blink of an eye strikes out at me. I dodge his blow that would've connected with my nose.

"Going for my nose?" I question as I block another blow with my forearm. "How rude, it's one of my best features."

Fynn chuckles and then sucks in a sharp breath as I manage to land a punch to his stomach.

"I always thought your eyes were your best feature," he comments. He's forced to jump back as I sweep a kick out to his legs.

"That's also true, but clearly you weren't listening. I said one of my best features." I smirk at him as we match blow for blow, letting him think it's an even fight. I'm back in my groove now and there's nothing he can do to stop me.

"You're not going to tell me my best feature?" His breath comes out heavier, nearly panting as I drag out this round.

I duck a wild blow and jab him right in the ribs. He immediately recoils but I jump up and slam my knee into his side. He falls backward and I hop on top of him pinning his hands down with my own.

He grunts. "I give."

I smirk down at him and climb off, offering a hand as I do so. He grabs it and I haul his ass up.

"Your best feature is also your eyes," I tell him, a teasing glint in my eyes. "Want to go again?"

"I don't think my ego or my ribs can take it." He places one hand over his stomach and gives me a half-smirk. "Call it a day? The spymaster should be with you soon anyway."

I let out a sigh. "Can't take the heat. I get it, it's tough to lose day after day."

"Your arrogance is insufferable."

My smug grin spreads further across my face. "You have just as much."

He rolls his eyes and slings an arm over my shoulders. "Walk me back to my tent so I can lick my wounds in peace."

"I thought you were going to stick around for my training? What happened to we're in this together?"

He swears. "You're right, but can we at least sit down for a minute?"

"I landed like three blows you big baby," I remark.

"You know I'm always extra tense the day after a mission."

I know the feeling, especially after really extensive missions. There's so much nervous energy before we act where we're all so tense because the fear of failing is so great. Our missions are too important to screw up.

"Maybe you could get Magda to rub down your back if she's not too busy," I suggest.

Magda is our resident medic. We've all been in to see her numerous times for our injuries at one time or another.

"That's not a bad idea." Fynn gives me an appreciative look.

I suddenly feel a presence behind me and I spin around to find the spymaster. He's more lanky than tall, very skinny, and impressively light on his feet. He wears all black underneath his even blacker cloak and his dark brown hair is chopped short under the hood that's pulled low over his face. He has a couple of freckles spread over his crooked nose and a nasty scar across his throat.

I've always thought him to be so plain-looking, which I guess helps when being a spy, but he has these majestic silver eyes that make him different from anyone I've ever meet or seen.

No one knows exactly where he's from, but it must be some kingdom far away that I've never heard about. A thick accent also coats his words whenever he speaks. Maybe that's another reason why he doesn't say much, he doesn't want to reveal his home kingdom if someone happens to recognize his features and accent.

The spymaster hardly speaks and doesn't go by a real name. We only refer to him as The spymaster. It's most likely some strategy Atwood has to keep his true identity a secret.

"Do you always have to sneak up on us?" I take a controlling breath, trying to get my heartbeat to calm down. There's something about him that always puts me on edge. I know I'm supposed to trust him, but I can't shake the feeling that he's secretly watching all of us for signs of defiance or betrayal. I can't blame Atwood for wanting to cover all his tracks, but The spymaster just knows how to get under my skin.

He neglects to say anything back to me and only clasps his hands together in front of him.

"I guess that means it's time we begin then," Fynn mutters from beside me.

I give Fynn a look out of the corner of my eye. This will be interesting.

I've gotten a lesson from The spymaster before. It was the one on stealth in the woods that I failed dramatically. Maybe it would help if he gave me more constructive criticism than a few measly words.

I try not to roll my eyes as The spymaster turns on his heel and starts walking in the direction of the denser woods, his cloak billowing out behind him.

He can be very dramatic.

Two hours in and I'm sweating and frustrated. I have no problems leaping from tree to tree, it's the damn noise that comes with it I can't shake. Fynn isn't doing any better—which makes me feel better, but The spymaster is clearly on his last breath of patience.

I'm not even sure what the purpose of this exercise is if I'm going to be inside the castle. When am I going to have to climb any trees?

"I almost didn't see you up there Kavanaugh," a voice calls out from below. I've been trying so hard to be quiet that the loud noise startles me and I almost slip off the branch I'm standing on.

"Damn it, Atwood!" I shout. I adjust my grip on the branch above my head until I feel secure again.

I hear Atwood's annoying chuckle. "Come on down from there. You too Rutter! We have something to discuss."

I hear a curse from Fynn in a tree somewhere to my left and I laugh.

I start making my way down, the skin on my hands screaming at me as I do so. I drop down at the same time Fynn does and we make our way over to where Atwood stands with The spymaster.

"New information on the mission?" I ask. I brush small pieces of bark and dirt off my hands.

"I want to go more in-depth," Atwood says. "I want to make sure if anything goes wrong you're equipped with the right tools and skills to escape from the castle. Hence, the tree climbing." He points a hand up toward the tree I just climbed down from.

Of course, there's a reason for what I'm doing. I should've thought of that.

"I don't want to put any pressure on you Saige," Atwood continues, "but I also want you to evaluate while in the field. If you feel like there's something you can do without being caught I want you to go for it. We're starting to near a turning point in our revolution and I want this to be one of the last things we have to do. If we can find out if the king is hiding anything, it could be our best chance at turning the rest of the kingdom against him."

"So, if I have an opportunity to break into his rooms, you want me to?" I lock eyes with Atwood's violet ones.

"Yes. I know I said last night you don't have to do something like that, but I still meant it. If you don't have a solid opportunity, I don't want you to risk it." He takes a couple of steps closer to me. "I do want to push you and find out what you're capable of."

I clench my jaw at his words.

When I think about my potential, I get scared. I've always been so good at everything I do physically that I've never had to push myself or test my limits.

I'm terrified of what I might find, especially with all the dark thoughts I have. I'm always so quick to anger and violence, I don't want to know how much of a monster I could potentially turn into.

"I would love to see that as well," Fynn chimes in. He smirks at me until he notices the look on my face causing his smirk to dissipate.

"I'm not sure I want to unleash myself," I tell Atwood honestly. It's as close as I'll ever get to admitting my true apprehension on the subject matter.

Atwood furrows his brows. "Why not?"

I freeze, s**t. I shouldn't have said anything.

"I—I want to stay in control. I can't accidentally kill anyone."

Atwood nods his head. "Very true, but I don't think you need to worry about that at all. We'll just spend the next few days before you leave honing in on what your best at. I also want you to talk with Kana. She can help you when it comes to extracting information from the servants. You know how good at talking she is."

A small smile works its way onto my face. Bloody Nyer, do I know how chatty Kana can be. There are times when it's way too much and I need a long break from her, and other times when it's nice to just sit there and listen to someone talk about their life.

I tend to turn to Kana when I'm feeling low. Her bubbly attitude has this unmatched energy that I need to feed off of sometimes. She's also my favorite person to go to taverns and drink with besides Fynn. Kana knows how to have a good time and turn any melancholy night into something to remember.

"She is talented at getting information out of me," I agree, nodding my head at Atwood.

A chuckle rumbles out of him. "Same with everyone in this camp. I want her to try and teach you to the subtle art of getting people to trust you and therefore feeling comfortable enough to tell you secrets."

"You mean to tell me she's been trained and that's why she's so good at finding out all my secrets?" An incredulous expression crosses over my face.

Atwood grimaces. "Probably shouldn't have told you that."

My jaw swings open and I turn my head to Fynn who wears a similar expression. Guess he didn't know either.

"Disregarding that," Atwood continues, his eyes flashing over to meet the spymaster's silver ones, "after lunch you'll continue working with our spymaster."

I manage to close my mouth and give Atwood a firm nod of confirmation.

"Splendid." Atwood clasps his hands together in front of him and gives me a bright smile. "I also would like to meet with you after you visit with Kana."

I roll my eyes. "Are you enjoying booking me solid?"

"Well, actually Saige, I'm trying to make sure you're as prepared as you can be for your mission." He gives me a flat look.

I want to cringe, but cover up the urge. Sometimes Atwood can be a decent man when he's not being an ass.

"Meet you in the war room?" I say instead.

"Yes." It's all he says as he turns and starts walking back towards camp, the spymaster following close behind.

Once they're out of earshot I turn to Fynn. "That could've gone better."

Fynn laughs and claps me on the back. "As I said, you're insufferable and before you say anything let's get lunch. I'm starving."

I purse my lips but keep my mouth closed as we start walking back.

After a long afternoon of practicing throwing knives and picking locks, the spymaster finally dismisses me and I head straight over to Kana's tent.

This day has turned into one of the longest days, and I haven't even had dinner yet. I'm already hungry after eating a plain meal of chicken and rice. We have our own garden that's slowly started to expand since we now have so many people living here, but it's been challenging to feed everyone at times. This mostly happens during the long winters where the snow won't let up and we can't grow a single thing.

I push open the flap of Kana's tent and step inside. Her tent is double the size of mine. Her cot is pushed up in the back corner and she has a small desk on the righthand side that holds a mirror, cosmetics, and other small trinkets she's collected over the years. She has a rug on the bottom of her tent and I can't help but wonder where she got that from. I don't remember it the last time I came here.

"How come you never told me you've been trained to learn my secrets?" I say by way of greeting.

Kana startles and flips around, her light pink hair flowing as she does so.

The people of Delphine are a major mix of people from all over and we're known for our multitude of hair and eye colors.

"Bloody Nyer Saige," she curses. "Don't sneak up on me like that." She places a hand over her heart.

"I wasn't even trying to be quiet." A sense of pride washes through me, maybe the spymaster's lessons are finally starting to pay off.

"You still scared me." She smiles at me then. "It's good to see you. How was your last mission?"

Kana is my closest friend here besides Akita and Fynn. I met her early on during my time here; she's someone I relied on a lot during those first few weeks to help me settle in. It was a big change from my past life with my father.

"Oh, no. You're not going to stand there and pretend you didn't hear my question." I point an accusing finger at her.

She blushes and tucks a piece of her beautiful hair behind her ear. "I've never tried to pry you for information and I've never told anything to Atwood."

"I know. I just wanted to call you out." I grin at her.

She grabs her pillow off her cot and throws it at me. I quickly catch it, chuckling. I lean over and gently place it back down on her cot.

"Did Atwood speak to you?" I ask her, raising my eyes from the pillow to meet her hazel eyes.

"Oh, yes. I'm fully prepped for what I have to teach you." She stops and bites her lip, clearly, something is on her mind that she doesn't know if she wants to say or not.

I move to sit down on the side of her cot and she follows me. We settle down together and stare straight ahead at her little vanity.

"Do you want to say it?" I practically whisper to her, wanting to ask gently.

"I'm just worried." Her head turns to the side to look at me. "Atwood is asking you to do something major for the rebellion and I'm just nervous about what could happen to you. All of us here have already lost so much losing anyone else—"

I reach out and pull her into a hug. "I know. I'm still not sure I'm going to do it."

She jerks her head back to gaze into my eyes. "What?"

I frown. "I can still back out. Atwood can't force me to do this. I don't know Kana." I heave out a long sigh and rub a hand over my forehead. "I'm not sure if I'm ready to do something so dangerous for the rebellion."

"But don't you already?"

I furrow my brow. "I don't understand your meaning."

"Don't you already lay down your life for the rebellion every time you go on a mission? How is this one any different?"

"Because if I get caught there's no going back."

"What if you had gotten caught last night?" she quips back, giving me a stern look.

"I wouldn't have," I tell her, my voice confused.

"No matter what you do for the rebellion there's always a chance of getting caught and being locked away in prison for the rest of your life. Every time you go on a mission I worry it'll be your last and I'll never see you again. This is no different."

I pause. It is really that simple though? Am I acting like this is anything different than what I've been asked to do before? Maybe it feels more serious because I've always been able to rely on myself physically to get out of a messy situation. But this time I can't force my way out of what I get myself into.

"I just feel like I'll have no control over how the mission goes. I guess I'm so used to relying on my skills that this one freaks me out more." I start to fiddle with my fingers in my lap. "Don't tell me this is you using your training on me."

A soft smile coats her lips. "I'm trying to talk to you as a friend, but it looks like maybe you could use a little of my skills to help you."

I let out a breathy half-laugh.

"This is no different than what you've been doing before," Kana goes on. "You might not have openly admitted that you risk your life every day for the people here, but you do."

She's right. She's completely right. I never thought of it that way. I've been making it this whole big thing to completely give myself over to the rebellion when I already have. I just haven't given a verbal commitment to it yet.

"You know what Kana?" I ask her. "This has helped me way more than you know."

She grins. "Good, now let's get started. You have so much work to do. How am I going to turn your lousy personality around in just three days?"

Now I'm the one throwing a pillow at her face.

By the time I finally make it to the war room to meet with Atwood, I'm so exhausted I could fall asleep standing up.

"Eventful day?" Atwood asks by way of greeting. He eyes me up and down before settling back on my face. I already know I look a mess and haven't been able to freshen up all day. I'm sure the bags under my eyes are darker than my navy-blue hair.

"I don't think I've been this excited for bed in my whole life," I mumble. I slouch down in the same chair I sat in the night before. The wood of the chair digging into my sore muscles.

"I'll try to keep this brief then." He walks over and leans against the table to my left with a serious look on his face. "I know you didn't join the rebellion in the way most others did."

Oh. We're having this conversation.

A year and a half ago when my father was forced to join the military I was left all alone in our house. It became a new kind of torture to stay there. After my mother passed the small house just felt empty, there was an irreplaceable piece missing and every step I took felt hollow.

Slowly, the place came back to life over the years as Father and I tried our best to live our lives, but after he left, I hated spending a minute there alone.

I tried to power through it, but every day became more and more challenging. I was working down by the port every day helping a fisherman on his boat. We would sail out and catch fish and then I'd return home only to do it all again the next day. My life felt mundane, and without Father there to keep me company I had never felt so alone.

I've never had friends as I do now. It's hard to keep them when so many are taken from you and imprisoned. Most children start working as soon as they can to help feed their families. There was little time for friendships to be made and kept over the harsh years.

I never heard much about the rebellion until I accidentally overheard a conversation between two people at one of my go-to taverns. The two members were talking about an upcoming mission they were doing and even just hearing them discuss their plans made me excited. It was the first feeling I had that wasn't loneliness in so long I held on to it with everything I had.

In the following weeks after I overheard their conversation, I went back to the tavern every night, hoping they would show up again or maybe some other members of the rebellion, but I never saw them again.

I almost became desperate in my search for the rebellion after that. The need to change my life and find some joy too great to ignore. It was the first time I'd ever been so driven to do something since before Mother died.

After searching for weeks, I grew tired of not getting any answers. I replayed the conversation the two members had in my head over and over until something clicked. One of them had mentioned something about the Varian Woods.

For me at that stage in my life, that information was enough for me to pack up a bag and wander into the woods. I stayed out there for a week before someone found me. They took me to Atwood who was suspicious of me at first but grew to trust me over time.

Most of the time for anyone to join the rebellion they normally have someone already on the inside to tie them in. It's so difficult to trust every person that says they want to join the rebellion, Atwood has a job I do not envy.

People who end up joining the rebellion are those who have experienced the harsh reality of the king's wrath first hand. There are hardly any complete families here, there's always someone they know who's been taken prisoner for the rest of their lives wrongfully.

It's why Atwood distrusted me so much at first. I've always despised the king and what this kingdom is like, but I've never felt the true terrors it can offer.

"You want to talk about why I joined again?" I question Atwood. I look up at him from in my chair.

Atwood crosses his arms over his chest. "No, I want to talk about where you're at right now. I can sense your inner conflict. While I am not going to force you to partake in this mission, I would like to see you take some initiative."

I'm quiet for a moment as I take in what he said.

After my conversation with Kana, I'm starting to feel better about the idea of doing this mission, but I still have worries in the back of my mind that haven't gone away.

I always used to think of myself as brave and courageous. I was never afraid to climb as high as I could in a tree and look down at the ground below. I always wanted to try new things growing up and was never afraid to jump off the towering rocks and into the Gallio sea. But all those things seem to be so trivial in comparison.

This is a different kind of brave I've never understood and have been fearful of.

"I trust you wholeheartedly Saige," Atwood says, staring down at me. "The issue here is I don't think you trust me or the rebellion."

I finch at his words, hating the way they hit home.

"Talk to me Saige," Atwood pleads. He pulls out the chair next to me and sits in it.

I don't even know where to start.

"Something is keeping you from giving us one hundred percent and I would like to understand what that is." His eyes search my face for any sign of what I'm thinking but I learned how to master a straight face a long time ago.

I release a breath, and with it my final resolve. "I guess it's about my father. I was all alone and so empty when he went to go fight in the war with Valterra. This was my way out. It started as a distraction, but slowly became my life. I don't know if my father is ever going to make it back or not, but if he does..." I trail off and look away from Atwood.

He nods his head solemnly. "I had an inkling it had something to do with your father. Why haven't you talked to me about this before? Pledging to the rebellion doesn't mean you can't ever leave. You're more than welcome to go home with him."

I open my mouth to respond only to find I have no words. I never thought about that before.

"And if you do not wish to leave he is more than welcome to come here," he adds.

I shut my eyes briefly and take a moment to situate myself. When I open my eyes again they immediately find Atwood. "Thank you."

Atwood sits back in his seat and appraises me. "I know this path isn't easy, but I would like to hope you have some fondness for us here."

The side of my lips quirks up. "I'd say I have some fondness."

Atwood hums and nods his head in approval.

"I'll do it," I say, shocking both Atwood and myself. "I'll do it," I say again, but with firmness in my tone.

Atwood stands and reaches out a hand to me. I clasp it and let him pull me up out of my seat. He clutches my hand tightly in his and uses his other to pat me on the back. This is about as touchy or sentimental as Atwood gets.

"I'm overjoyed to hear it Saige."

I can see how proud he is in his eyes as he stares at me. The feeling crushes through me. I've never seen Atwood look at me like this before and suddenly it makes me feel brave. The kind of brave I never thought I could be.