MARRY MY HUSBAND

CHAPTER ONE (the end )

"I used to think love was something you could build with time , sacrifice and patience that if I gave enough of myself he would actually see me , choose me or even love me" I was wrong .

The truth hit me on an ordinary evening. In the same place I once called home . It smelled faintly of cigarette smoke and expensive cologne, Henry's scent , though he always denied smoking. I walked in dragging my feet as my sick body could carry me, only to hear whispers that were never meant for me to hear .

"Don't worry,she won't last long " Henry's voice low and familiar.

"Good, am tired of pretending ". That was Claire My best friend , my only friend. I tried to scream but the only words that came out were whispers, heart pounding .

everything finally coming together. Every laugh, every touch, every stolen glance between them that I pretended not to notice finally made sense .

I felt like a sharp knife was cutting through my soul, I wanted to scream , to tear the walls apart but my body betrayed me too.

I was Weak, trembling and useless.

When Henry finally noticed me standing in shock over what I just witnessed ,the look in his eyes wasn't guilt , it was annoyance as if I had interrupted something he was entitled to .

The last thing I remembered that night was a sharp ,cold edge of despair , my life ended not with love , but with betrayal .

But death was not the end of me .

I woke up to the sound of my alarm like another ordinary morning, my eyes shot open and for a moment I taught it was all a dream , that I was trapped in some nightmare . But no , the room was different, the bedsheets were different.

My body .....it didn't ache

My chest felt lighter , my hands steader .

I rushed to the mirror , the reflection staring back at me wasn't the sickly woman I had become, it was me, ten years younger, before the marriage, the sickness, before everything burned and I thought to myself with disbelief "was this a second chance " Or some punishment.

The weight of memory pressed harder than any physical pain, fire , betrayal, the swing of a fist , the cruel laughter echoing as my body burned, i taught I'd escape all this by dying, but here i was,Back .

The calendar on the wall took my breath away . “2010”

The door opened and a nurse stepped in, tray in hand "You're awake ", she said, relief flashing in her eyes , you fainted at work do you remember?

“Work” Yes, Back when I was still an ordinary office worker, clinging to routine, while life slipped out of me .

I'm fine I said too quickly, my voice echoing like a gong . She fussed over me , checked the monitor, and asked me to rest , but all I could see was the date. All I could feel was time folding in on itself, crushing me .

When she left I jumped out of bed and opened the window outside , Manchester shined under a pale winter sun , people rushed below , coats buttoned tight , coffee in hand , lives spinning forward while mine had been spun backwards .But one thing was clear I wasn't going to waste it .

This time I would not love the wrong man This time I would not trust the wrong friend ,

This time "Sophie " would live.