Never Goodbye, A Werewolf Romance - (Book 1-The Mist Series)

~ Chapter 5 - On My Mind ~

~ Joseph ~

“Louise…” Her name rolled through my brain like a lovesick puppy, a severe contrast to the storm raging within me. The mere thought of her. The curve of her cheek, the way she met my gaze defiantly. It was enough to send a shiver down my spine.

My wolf Zodiac. He felt it too, the primal urge that threatened to shatter my carefully constructed control.

Being the future alpha of the Mist clan wasn’t just about power. It was about restraint. It was about holding back the beast, wielding it only when necessary to protect my pack. But Louise. The thought of her made that difficult.

The first moment I saw her, a wave of pure, untamed adrenaline slammed into me. It wasn’t Zodiac reacting the way had expected. This was deeper. Older. It was a feral recognition, a whisper in my blood that echoed from generations past. I instantly knew she was my fated mate.

But her face was blank. No recognition. No shock. Just frustration that I had dared to even talk to her. The lack of a reaction told me everything I needed to know. She wasn’t old enough to feel the tug of the mate call. The realisation ignited a possessive fire in my gut. If she had been of age, nothing would have stopped my desires. I would have given in to the dark animal within—the one who only sought to claim. I would have buried my teeth in her slender neck, claiming her and f*****g her then and there, feeling every inch of her heavenly body, tasting all of her. And as alpha blood, I didn’t care who was present. A simple growl would have sent them running.

Even just thinking about it, Zodiac slammed against the inner walls of my skull, a low growl rumbling in my chest.

Louise was a stunning golden beaker of light in the darkness—a brilliant morning sun on a chilly day, a yellow sunflower alone in a dusty field. Her short blonde hair created a halo around a heart-shaped face. When she looked at me through dark eyelashes, my insides burned. My skin yearned for her touch. I wanted to pin her against the wall and lick my way from her thighs to her lips, savouring every second.

“But she’s sick…” Zodiac stated in a fierce growl in my mind that sobered me. “And that scent…”

The scent! I shivered at the memory of the obnoxious mixture of sickly sweet caramel, vinegar, and sourness that had hit my nose when she was close. It was unnatural. I blanched as the thought of it triggered pure aggression within Zodiac, causing him to bury his claws into my brain.

“Settle, Zodiac…” I cautioned, using all my mental and physical strength to control him.

The pain was an excruciating, white-hot agony that threatened to overwhelm me. I had to maintain control, not just for myself, but for Louise.

“She’s sick!” he repeated, the words guttural and laced with disgust. Frustrated, he huffed, relented, and retreated into the shadows of my mind, leaving me reeling.

Fighting against the headache Zodiac had so graciously given me, I slumped at the desk in the back of the history classroom. I hung my head in my hands, lost in a whirlwind of thoughts. Why did she have such an unusual smell? Why is she ill…? And why was I the only one who noticed?

Werewolves don’t get sick! I shook my head, trying to come to terms with it. That can’t be possible. She’s a fucken werewolf like me! She shouldn’t be sick!

Louise was a werewolf, or at least, she was supposed to be. My mate. She shouldn’t be plagued by the undeniable scent of sickness clinging to her. It defied everything I knew, everything I believed about our kind. Our resilience, our regenerative abilities, our inherent strength—all rendered meaningless in the face of her frailty.

The moment I realised Louise was my mate, an undeniable pull had taken hold, an irresistible need to be near her, to learn everything about her. To protect her. I’d pulled every string I could find, leveraging my father’s influence as Alpha George to enroll myself at Our Lady of Souls, the private school stamped on her blazer. Mentioning a potential mate was all it took. My parents had thrown money at me and ushered me out the door.

I couldn’t just waltz in alone, not as the alpha. I needed a shield, a backup… my personal conscience. I constantly needed fucken reminding that humans and wolves shared this school. We had to remain secret or face the wrath of the Elders if the secret was revealed. And they were not werewolves to disappoint.

So, my loyal best friend and destined beta, Kingston, had transitioned with me. A sacrifice I wouldn’t forget. We were eighteen, barely four weeks past the cusp. This was our final year of homeschooling. The timing was almost perfect. I could spend this year learning about Louise, waiting for her wolf to awaken, to claim her.

But she’s sick! The frustration clawed at me, sharp and demanding.

Another memory surfaced. The flash of defiance in her eyes, the biting edge in her voice when I’d bumped into her in the hallway. That fierce spirit and untamed spark ignited a fire in my blood. My fangs ached to sink into the sensitive skin of her neck and mark her as mine. The left side. I would own the sweet side of her neck. Permanently.

“Yo, Joseph, buddy,” Kingston’s voice cut through my fantasy. It was a welcome intrusion. “Jo… Hey Jo!”

“Hmm?” I dragged myself back to reality, pivoting in my chair to face him.

Kingston, with his shock of white hair and tanned skin, was a magnet for the human girls in the room. They hung on his every word, desperate for a glance, even a simple smile. I tried to focus on him, but my mind kept drifting back to those tantalising images of Louise, of her…

“Oi, Joseph!” Kingston hissed, his teeth flashing white against his tan. “Joseph Irvine Black… Earth to Joseph!”

“What?” I snapped, meeting his intense blue eyes. For a fleeting moment, Zodiac surged forward, his frustration mirroring my own. Deny it all he wanted, he was captivated by Louise. I saw the flicker of surprise in Kingston’s eyes and quickly claimed control, pushing Zodiac back into the shadows. “What is it?”

“Should we remind the teacher he’s wrong…?” Kingston chuckled through the mind link, his voice laced with barely contained amusement. The girls in front of him sighed, fluttering their eyelashes, but he remained oblivious. “Should we remind him that North Folk werewolves in Tasmania are the reason the Tasmanian tiger went extinct? Not humans… It would blow these human minds!”

“I would like to see that written in human history books.” I chuckled, the thought distracting me from the gnawing unease in my gut. “But I’m sure our teacher knows that already. He’s a werewolf after all.”

To my right, a red-haired human girl and her brunette friend sighed at me. I ignored them. It was the lust drive, the primal allure unmated werewolves invoked in humans, and as a future alpha, that drive was intense. Disgustingly so. Ignoring them, my thoughts returned to Louise. What the hell was wrong with her?

“She’s sick!” Zodiac snuffed matter-of-factly, his voice a low growl in my mind.

“Tell me something I don’t know!” I snarled back at him, my frustration with my helplessness rising.

“She’s our mate!” He emphasised the word ‘our’ like I needed reminding. As if I could ever forget.

“Seriously,” I groaned, rolling my eyes. “I know!”

He growled something unintelligible and slunk away, the connection between us thinning. The bastard was enjoying my inner turmoil too much.

“Stupid mutt, I know you were enjoying those mental images!” I muttered, picturing the way he reveled in any thought of Louise—especially those intimate ones neither of us dared dwell on.

“You should talk to her,” Kingston added under his breath, reading the worry etched on my face. “You know, if you speak more than two words, you might get to know her. Instead of making her flip out and want to murder you!”

The memory of how her delicious mouth moved as she spat out her defiance made me want to taste it, to silence her with a kiss that would drive her as crazy as she drove me. Louise was an omega, but not one to be underestimated. There was a spark in her, something unique that intrigued me as much as the desire to know her intimately. Despite her delicate frame, she possessed surprising strength. Her defiance ignited a feral instinct within me, pushing me toward claiming her prematurely. Until that fucken scent hit us.

But s**t, she bit back, and I enjoyed it! That forbidden thought travelled deep through me, making my body react like it had never done before. I was tight. Warm. Excited. The image of her naked body against mine made sitting uncomfortable.

“Did the heat just rise in here? Because it smells like it did. And these human girls are melting for you.” Kingston teased in my mind.

“Maybe…” I shot him a sideways smirk that confirmed his suspicions and returned to my thoughts, his laughter echoing in my head.

I sighed inwardly, my body growing warmer again. Louise was outspoken and challenging, fierce and defensive. I wanted to tell my parents I’d found my mate. Her illness put too much weight on what should be a joyous occasion. Her unnatural condition for a wolf would spark unwanted attention, a spotlight our pack couldn’t afford. The Elders would be the least of our worries. The consequences of neighbouring packs and rogues could be far more devastating.

We would seem weak. And the Mist clan was far from weak. We were among the top in strength and cunning. Having a sick Luna would jeopardise that.

“Then we can’t have a sick mate! We would be ridiculed—shunned!” Zodiac argued, burying his claws in my mind again, driving away the heat that had been building. “We can’t…!” A whine of pain escaped him. He sat back on his grey haunches, closed his eyes and howled for her, then returned to the back of my mind with his head low.

Behind my eyes throbbed. He was right. But Goddess, I would have given anything for that to be different.

“Bro, watch out…!” Kingston shouted into my mind as the looming figure of our teacher, Mr. Herman, appeared before my desk. “s**t… Too late… Sorry!”

“Master Black…” Mr Herman breathed, crossing his arms. He resembled the teachers you see in movies, with a white shirt beneath a brown knitted vest. It made him look years older than he was. “Do you mind! Bring your head down from the clouds! History waits for no one.”

“But history is in the past…” I added with an egotistical smirk. “I’m more for the here and now…”

Kingston chuckled beside me, echoed by a few werewolf students around the room. The human girls sighed again. But Mr. Herman didn’t flinch.

“Learning about the past is how we shape the future.” He replied, narrowing a knowing gaze back at me. “Don’t you agree, Mr. Black?”

A glint of his delta wolf, Chase, shone in his yellowing eyes, bringing Zodiac just below the surface.

“What do you think, Lyle?” I sneered as I stood and locked gazes with him.

Zodiac pushed unsuccessfully against the barrier I had placed in my mind to contain him. “Disrespectful delta!”

The room was filled with hushed whispers from the humans and an obedient silence from the werewolves. I could feel the eyes of all the human females on me. But Mr. Herman remained neutral-faced.

Like most trained warriors, Lyle Herman was above an omega but below a gamma. He had been trained to fight, focus, and obey. Once a loyal pack member, he gave up fighting to become a teacher at Our Lady of Souls. He knew my rank. All the werewolves in the school knew. It radiated from me in waves. Everyone except Louise. Why was that?

My alpha rank meant I was homeschooled. Why every alpha was. But I was here for my mate. No teacher was getting in my way.

“You dare disrespect me, Lyle?” I growled through the mind link that was open to all the pack members. I squared my shoulders and tensed as Zodiac pushed harder for control.

“Humans… human witnesses!” Kingston mind linked me, throwing me off guard.

“Forgive me, Alpha,” Lyle replied meekly in my mind. He shook his head and willed his wolf away. “All I ask is that you respect me in my classroom while you’re here, please.”

“Respect you?” I snarled. I leaned in closer to him, making him shrink back. “Remember, I’m alpha blood…”

“Humans!” Kingston’s wolf Dynamite roared loud enough in my brain that it stunned Zodiac.

When the whispers of curious human onlookers reached my ears, I sucked in a deep breath. My eyes bordered on the predatory wolf-black, so I willed Zodiac as far back as possible. Now, the entire class had stopped their work to watch, half in awe and half in fear.

“Sorry, Alpha,” Lyle crossed his arms, attempting to show his delta backbone. He glanced at me, catching me off guard, and sniffed. He sensed something in my aura that made him nod, and a faint smile formed on his lips. “Alpha, I suggest you leave the room… Go and get some fresh air.”

“What?” I clenched my hands, fighting back my claws. “Putting on a show, I see…”

“This is a human and wolf mixed school, Joseph!” Kingston repeated. “Leave… you’re on edge anyway…”

Lyle smacked a hand down on my desk, making the rest of the class jump. “Master Black, in this classroom, I expect my students to abide by three simple rules—kindness, attention, and respect.”

“Respect?” I nearly laughed at this. “What the f**k! Who do you think you are…? I am Alpha blood!”

“Not here, bro…” Kingston warned under his breath. He was always one for a fight. That was how I broke my arm. But this time, I could hear the worry in his voice. “Just leave… your predatory drive is on a high… worry about that girl… We’ll deal with Lyle later…”

“Master Black, please leave my classroom.” Lyle Herman pointed an unsteady finger towards the door. He knew I could kill him in one swipe, and no one in the werewolf community would bat an eye. But if I killed him in front of humans, my father would reprimand me and the Elders. I shivered at the thought. “Consider yourself excused for the rest of the lesson.”

Zodiac clawed at the edges of my consciousness, a raging inferno contained within the cage of my skull. His growls vibrated through my bones in a primal scream demanding release. I clenched my fists, forcing my human mask to stay plastered in place.

“If you do a big reveal and the alpha finds out…” Kingston warned, stiffening in his seat. “Worse… if the Luna found out, you would be in crap so deep it would never wash off!”

He was right. Exposing myself, exposing us, to the human world would violate the centuries-old treaty. And the Luna—my mother—her displeasure was something legends were made of. Not good legends.

I swallowed my anger, forcing it down, locking Zodiac back into the deepest recesses of my mind.

“Fine with me, sir…” I spat, kicking my chair back with unnecessary force. I snatched up my things, the gesture more aggressive than I intended, and stormed towards the door. The human females followed me with their eyes, their bodies responding to the pheromonal storm I was barely containing. It was instinctive, a primal pull towards an alpha even when he was trying to be discreet.

I glared at Lyle, the pompous jerk with the coiffed hair who enjoyed pushing my buttons, flashing my eyes, letting a flicker of the Alpha fire burn through. I heard him suck in a sharp breath before the door slammed shut behind me.

Outside the classroom, I had to retract Zodiac’s claws from my fingertips. I had come dangerously close to revealing our secret, to shattering the fragile peace, all because I’d found her. Found Louise. My mate. And the discovery had turned me into a beast in every sense of the word.

“Cheers for the reminder, Kingston,” I muttered, directing the thought towards his mind as I strode down the hallway. “As fun as always…”

“Go find your mate before you tear the school down…” Kingston insisted, his mental voice laced with a dark chuckle. “I’ll not be the one to deal with the Luna’s wrath if you do.”

I snorted, a knowing sound that carried the weight of centuries of shared history. Kingston was right—he usually was—and I would rather battle a pack of rogue shifters than admit it out loud. But closeness to my mate, even if she remained unaware, was turning me feral. I was more possessive, more aggressive, the primal desires to claim and protect burning within me. It was Zodiac amplifying my instincts tenfold. But it was also something more. When a werewolf found their mate, it was a primal imperative to protect, claim, mate, and mate again. Not always in that order. And as alpha blood, I knew those instincts were quadrupled for me.

That alluring heat, that irresistible pull towards Louise, intensified, making my walk awkward and uncomfortable.

Again, Kingston clicked his tongue in my mind, feigning a sniff. Our friendship bond was as strong as it had been since we first met, a silent understanding that transcended words. He could read my emotions from the other side of the Mist clan borders. “It’s getting hot in here… So take off all your clothes…”

“Oh, shut up…” I grunted, a gruff laugh eluding me despite my best efforts.

“You know you would be lost without me…”

“Maybe…” I shook my head, finally severing the mental link, needing a moment of peace.

Outside, the sun struggled to pierce a thick layer of dusty grey clouds. May and June in Australia were a bleak affair, a relentless onslaught of rain, frigid air, the occasional hailstorm, and sometimes, a biting icy wind. As a werewolf, the weather barely registered. I had trained countless nights on the grounds behind Gamma Archie’s cabin, soaked to the bone, unfazed by the cold. But did it bother Louise? I didn’t know the extent of her illness. I had to find out.

“Mate… why is she sick?” Zodiac rumbled, his voice a low growl in my mind. The tone was a mixture of tenderness and raw sorrow.

“I don’t know,” I sighed, running a hand through my hair. “But we need to find her and see.”

“Mate…” Zodiac repeated, his voice fading as he retreated into the shadows of my mind.

At the bottom of the stone steps that led to a lunch van, I stopped and shrugged off my blazer, then tossed it over my shoulder. The fake grass arena stretched before me, empty save for the lone worker in the van, setting up for the afternoon rush. I slid onto a nearby bench, shielding my eyes as I peered up at the sky, trying to gauge the sun’s position. It was nearly lunchtime. Louise would soon be out of class soon. A slow grin spread across my face. I reclined against the seat, letting my thoughts drift to her. Her lips, the way her brown eyes gazed up at me—even a fleeting thought sent a jolt of longing through me.

“Enough already! I’ll sing it…” Kingston demanded, his mental voice laced with amusement.

“Don’t you dare…” I warned, a laugh bubbling up from my chest.

“If you send that scent through the school again, I will sing it…” he threatened playfully. “And Goddess help all these people…”

Grinning, I crossed my arms over my chest, one leg draped over the other, and relaxed. “Blame those animal instincts…”

“If I have to sing, I’m blaming you… and so will everyone else.”

“We’ll see…” I smirked, adjusting my pants in a deliberate movement, settling more comfortably on the bench. “We’ll see…”