Yesterday's Pain

Chapter 8

Acting like a cheerful person even though I am a wreck inside must be my forte. I have heard words that broke me into little pieces but right now I am acting like I wasn't hurt at all.

"Good morning Andrew." I greeted him smiling from ear to ear. He looked at me and smiled.

"Good morning Lauren." He greeted me back but not with the same energy I have given. I smiled to shrug off the negativity in my mind.

"You have school right?" He asked and I nodded my head. I get up and fix the bed that we used.

"I don't think I can drive you to school Lauren." He informed me but I understand him. I can go to school by myself. I am old enough to be accompanied by him, he sees me as a kid but I am already an adult.

"I can handle myself Andrew don't worry and I am thinking of not going to school today. I will just write an excuse letter for my professor, I am sure they will understand." When I said those words I already got an answer. The way his forehead crease and look at me intently I know he is not agreeing to my decision.

"You will go to school Lauren. I can take care of Dad, besides he told me that he wants to go home since the hospital is making him feel sick even more. We will just hire a private nurse for him." I nodded my head and didn't utter any words.

"I will fetch you later just text me when your class is done." I felt happy when he said that. An act of service made me feel loved, it must be my love language.

"Thank you, Andrew." I couldn't contain the happiness I am feeling so I hugged him tightly. I felt him hugging me back and caressing me.

"I am your husband, it is part of my duty." He answered so I hugged him even tighter. He was not pushing me so I hugged him as long as I could. I will take every chance I could get to be this close to Andrew.

"Ehem-ehem." A pretentious cough of Andrew's father made both of us to looked in his direction.

"Seeing you like this made me remember the good all days," Dad told us while a sweet and genuine smile is plastered on his face. He looks like he is reminiscing the memories he had with her wife. His eyes are full of love while doing that. Will Andrew remember me in that way when we grow old? How I wish that time would come.

"Good morning Dad." I greeted Mr. Heman and I saw him opening his arms urging me to hug him. I walk towards his bed and hugged him carefully afraid that I might touch his wound or the apparatus that was connected to his body.

"Good morning Lauren." He greeted me back and kissed my forehead. I miss my Dad, even more, when he did that. I felt some hot liquid forming on the side of my eyes. I wiped it immediately to stop it from falling.

"Why are you crying, Lauren?" He asks with worry in his voice. I shook my head but he wasn't convinced and waited for another answer.

"It's just that I miss my Dad, Dad," I confessed while sobbing. I continued wiping my tears. Andrew handed me a tissue so I grabbed it to wipe my face.

"We will visit him this weekend Lauren, don't worry." I looked at Andrew when he said that. The way he treats me is changing. It only shows that he really loves his father. He is willing to do everything just to please him. He is willing to love me even though it is against his will.

"Are you sure? Aren't you busy?" He receives multiple calls every day so I think he doesn't have time to spare to visit my father. I can go there alone though. Adam and Madie promised me that they will go with me when I visit my father.

"I will make time for you Lauren and besides I want to build a relationship with your father." He gave me a small smile and patted my head. I hope my father will welcome us into his house after what has happened. I miss him so much I know he is sad being alone in our house. I want to fix my relationship with my Dad before working on my relationship with Andrew. I want to make everything right and I will start by asking for my father's forgiveness. I admit it, I love Andrew so much but at some point, I regret marrying him without thinking about it deeply. I should have considered all the consequences instead of jumping to a marriage that I have no idea what awaits me. If I used my head then maybe I am not stuck in this situation but I am already in here so I have no choice but to make things work.

"I am proud of you son." Mr. Gray smiled widely at his son showing how proud he is. He even called Andrew to come near him to tap its shoulder.

"I hope you will have a successful and happy married life before I die and please let me see my grandchildren, give me at least one Lauren, okay?" I nodded shyly as an answer to Mr. Herman's question. I don't think we can afford to have a child in this situation, our relationship didn't even reach an intimate level. I bet that will be a lot of work before we go there but I don't want to spoil Mr. Herman's happiness by answering negatively.

"Lauren will be late for her school Dad. I will just accompany her to the hospital's lobby then I will come back after okay? I will call a nurse to assist you here." Andrew must be a Daddy's boy. The way he shows care for his father only proves that he is capable of loving. Andrew is not a bad guy Lauren, he must be cold and ruthless sometimes but when you decided to know him you will see how good he is as a person.

I will climb your walls Andrew no matter how tall it is. No matter how many times I would fall, I will still climb your walls until I became closer to you. I will enter your world even though I am aware that I won't fit in.

"Have fun in your school Lauren". He kissed my forehead before I leave but I am not contented with that. It looks like I am his daughter and not his wife, with enough guts and courage I move my face closer to him and give him a quick kiss. He was shocked by my action and he couldn't react. Afraid that he will be mad at what I did I get in the car and wave my hands to say my goodbyes. I informed the personal driver of his father that we can leave so he started the engine and drove away to the hospital. I looked in Andrew's direction once again and I saw him holding his lips while looking at the car that I am in. Starting from this day you won't look at me as a kid who is obsessed with you. I will change myself so you will start seeing me as a wife that you will eventually love.

" Just stop here Sir," I informed the driver and he gave in to my request. He was about to enter the school gate but I stop him. Mr. Herman's car will catch everyone's attention and I don't to be anyone's topic. Some students already hate me and I know they talk s**t behind my back so I don't want to add some fuel to the enviousness that they feel towards me.

I walk to the hallway and I saw some students watch my every step. They are eyeing me from head to toe but I continued walking. I will not be the same Lauren anymore. I am not the weak Lauren whom you can underestimate. I didn't mind everyone's stare I just walked confidently to the hallway until I reached my room. When I entered, our class is about to start. One of our terror professors started discussing the lesson and I am glad I arrive on time because if not I will be my professor subject for today.

I couldn't focus on our class because I was busy thinking about how I could look like a mature woman. I watch the clock's hands as it jumped from one number to another. I badly want to see Madie right now to ask for some advice since she is an expert in terms of being mature.

"It looks like you have something else on your mind, Lauren?" My professor's question made me tremble. He will probably ask me thoughts about our lesson I don't think I can answer him.

"Can you share some insights regarding my lesson Lauren?" I was right. He looked at me while raising his right eyebrow. He walked in my direction while holding a stick.

"You don't want to study anymore Lauren?" I shook my head to disagree with his idea but he just gave me a sarcastic smile.

"Well, you can stop studying though since your husband is rich and he can support your financial needs. You can just lay down while waiting for your husband to come home like a useless woman who is too dependent on a man." An insulting laugh roared in the whole room and it didn't just come from our professor's mouth but to the whole class as well. Everyone in the classroom threw me an insulting laugh. I couldn't take the humiliation so I stood up and gather my things. I can't stay in that room any longer. I don't want to stay in that place where everyone degrades me.

I was walking in the hallway while wiping my tears. I just told myself earlier I will be stronger than before but I couldn't even defend myself from their insulting remarks. I couldn't see the way clearly so I bumped into someone.

"Lauren?" Adam's worried voice enveloped my ears. I cried more upon hearing him speak. I lifted my face and he was about to wipe my tears when I stopped him.

"I am married Adam." He immediately put his hand down and took three steps backward

"Is this enough?" He asked and I don't know if I heard it right but I somehow I hear pain in his voice. I looked at his face and it looks miserable as well. He must be pitying me that is why he looked like that. He is hurt seeing me in this situation.

"I am so sorry Adam." I didn't know that we will come to this point wherein I will push him away from me.

"I totally understand Lauren, don't worry about me." He smiled but it didn't reach his eyes. It hurts seeing us drifting away from each other. But life is a matter of choice, it is either I will choose Adam to save our friendship or I will choose Andrew even though it will hurt Adam. As unfair as it may sound, I will still choose Andrew even though he gave me pain more than joy.

"Have you seen Madie?" I asked him and he nodded.

"She's in the cafeteria with her classmates Lauren." He left after saying that. As I watch him walk away I felt like something inside me shattered. Losing Adam hurts because he's always there when I needed him but I chose to abandon him for the man I love.

With a heavy heart, I walked to the cafeteria to find Madie. I saw her eating her pasta while talking with her classmates. She waved her hands when she saw me. She pointed me at her friend so I nodded my head when they looked in my direction. Madie bid her goodbyes and walk towards me.

"Did you cry, Lauren?" She hold my face and move it from left to right even up and down, checking every corner.

"Who did this to you huh? I will smack the face of that son of a b***h?" She looks furious but I did not tell her the details of what have happened. I know Madie, she is not afraid of anything. When she said something she will do it in a heartbeat, without minding the consequences. We are somehow similar in that part but I am a lot worse compared to her.

"It is not important Madie." I thought I could stop her but here we are walking in the hallway while I am grabbing her arm trying to stop her from going to our room. Madie might create a commotion and I don't want her to be involved in a mess. I know her father can help her get out of trouble but still, I don't want her to be put in any kind of danger.

"Please Madie don't go there," I begged and almost kneeled but she didn't listen to me. We reached my room and entered without notice.

"Who the hell made Lauren cry?!" She shouted on top of her lungs making everyone flinch even my terror professor. I was shocked when my block mates pointed at my professor. He looks so scared of Madie while holding his book tightly. Madie's movements were fast and in just a few seconds she already grabbed the collar of my professor's polo.

"So it's you huh?" She asked and smacked the face of my professor as if it was just an ordinary student. Everyone shouted and praised her for what she did. I saw how students started flocking in. Madie is in big trouble but she acts like it wasn't a big deal. I hope her father can help her with this one.

Satisfied with what she did Madie and I get out of the room. We saw Adam leaning at my classroom's door smirking. He raised his hand and Madie gave him a high five. Both of them laugh like an i***t and I cannot stop myself from smiling. How did I end up becoming friends with these people?

"I am proud of you Maddison Miller," Adam announced like a proud father. He even patted Madie's head. I just shook my head disagreeing with what Madie have done.

"You always have us, Meghan, remember that." Different from the usual way Adam acted towards me, he just give me a small smile after saying those words.