K A I

Chapter |3| Stay Away

K A I ' S P.O.V

"Emery." I mumble. "Emery. Emery Grayson. f**k, Emery. s**t, I'm screwed."

"What the hell do you keep mumbling?" Kiara complains, shoving crisps into her mouth.

Every so often she feeds her husband and he sucks the left over crisp residue off her fingers, staring into her eyes in the most creepy f*****g way whilst she sighs in content, smiling.

"Emery." I say it louder so they hear.

"The doctor?" Aaron replies, gesturing for more food. Kiara obliges and I grimace, quickly looking away.

My head throbs, the pain and impact of being shot finally catching up with me. We stopped at a convenience store on the way. I grabbed some pills and whiskey even though Kiara warned me not too. The combination was good at the time. Now not so much.

"I think I'm gonna hurl." I groan, clutching my stomach.

"Don't even f*****g think about." They both growl. Of course, they pride their leather seats over my health.

"So what about Emery?"

"She was pretty." I slur, my head whacking the window.

"She was." My sister agrees and then eyes me carefully. "What did you do when we weren't there? Did you kiss her?" I think about sucking the blood off her lips.

I kissed because of different reasons. One, a distraction from her intruding thoughts, two, to flirt with her and for some reason, and three I did it because I thought she was in pain.

Part of me just wanted to soothe her, ease what angst she was suffering from.

I saw the blood, her broken skin, and wanted to fix it. To heal her.

What a stupid f*****g thought because she was definitely freaked out by it, but it wasn't a kiss. Not a real one like I dream of planting on her now.

"No. We just talked, but it was nice to talk her."

"You're telling me you actually talked to a girl without the intention of f*****g her?"

"Of course I wanted to f**k her." I still can't get the image of her pouted red lips latched around my c**k out of my head. "It just wasn't the basis of our conversation. Sure there was flirting but it was just different."

"Maybe you should ask her out?" Kiara says hopefully. I smile but for some reason fear creeps it.

I've never been the guy you bring home to meet your parents. Nor have I wanted too. I know I don't just want to f**k Emery, I want to talk to her again. She makes say things I don't ever let out.

Why? No f*****g clue but that's what I want to find out.

"I gave her my phone so if she calls then..." the car screeches to a halt as Aaron slams on the brake.

"What the f**k did you just say?" Kiara exclaims, and both of them turn in their seats, fixing their sharp glares on me.

"Did getting shot effect your brain?" Aaron adds.

"Are the pain meds causing some loopy side effects?"

"Do we need an actual doctor to check your f*****g sanity?"

"Okay okay. Give it a f*****g rest."

"First of all, how would she even call you?"

"I have two phones in case you're forgetting. The shittier ones at home and it's the same number." Thank god I haven't got rid of it yet.

"But what about the others? Huh? That phone has all your contacts on it including clients and...uh I'm too tired for this s**t. Aaron drive to my parents, we can talk about it there."

The car drive to proceed is one of the longest of my life, stuck in drivelling silence with both of them seething at me.

I practically run inside. Okay hobble, but faster than the two angry giants behind me that are closing on my tail.

My mom is in tears when I walk in so I'm guessing Kiara already called her about the incident.

"Kai are you okay? Does it hurt? What do you need? You should stay here for a bit...just until you're back on your feet? Oh my baby." She peppers my face with tiny kisses, and wraps her arm to gently steer me towards the couch.

There's a warm blanket already waiting for me, as well some tea and my favourite comic books from when I was twelve. I laugh but the action pulls on my wound. "Mom, tell me you didn't dig these out of the attic just because I'm injured."

"Don't be silly. They're still in your old room, all of them. I've decided to keep all your rooms the same, just for memories. It gets lonely sometimes, here all alone. Your father hates it but...I'll never change this place."

I feel terrible. Even though the intense grief we all suffered after Kalen died has waded slightly, I've forgotten that to my mom it never will. She lost her child and then we all moved out of here, and dad is barley home, even though he's semi retired.

I've always been the closest to her. Even though Kiara was youngest, I've always been her little Kai and when I left, I took that away from her.

"I think I will stay for a bit. I definitely can't cook for myself anymore mom." She laughs, but I don't miss the glimmer of excitement in her eyes at the prospect of looking after me.

It's devastating.

Kiara storms in, less angry than before, but her stride is met with purpose. Aaron is behind her and he nods at me, as though he's defused some of the bomb about to explode.

"He gave the doctor his phone!"

My mom meets my sister's glare with a smile. "What do you mean Kiara? Which hospital did you go to?"

"We didn't. We went to a small clinic instead and the only doctor there was with 20 something year old woman, that Kai clearly wants to fuck."

My mom ignores that last part. "So he gave her his number?"

"No I mean his whole f*****g phone!" My sister slaps my head.

"Ow." I cry out, shuffling closer to my mom.

"Kiara." She pointedly warns. Aaron stands in the corner with an amused smile, watching our screwed family dynamic with glee.

"Sorry Ma, but he f****d up. That has contacts on it, numbers of clients...of d**g dealers and guys that would murder idiots like you that hand their numbers out."

I understand her anger is out of care but sometimes it pisses me off that everyone still sees me in the same way. Like I'm the same f****d up irresponsible kid who does everything without thinking first.

"Can you relax? Whilst she was grabbing her things, I removed the passcode and deleted everything off it, except the number. I was trying to be romantic. Jesus, I like the girl."

"You mean you want to f**k her." Kiara blankly states. I know she's testing me. She wants me to say that I'll ask Emery in a date. That I see a future with her.

I've never look that far ahead, but for now I know I want Emery as a friend.

I shrug. "What's wrong with that?"

"She was a nice girl, and I don't want you to break her heart like you do with every other girl you meet. Besides, she didn't seem like the one night stand type."

"But she did like me, you can't deny that." When Kiara stays quiet, I mentally do a victory cheer.

Emery was beautiful. Her long red hair and fox green eyes are something I won't easily forget after a drink or two, and there was just something between us. The conversation flowed like water, and whenever it stilled, it was because she dug deep. Deeper than I expected her too and for once she takes me off my guard.

Emery is a challenge, and for a guy like me that's a good enough reason to give away your a thousand dollar phone.

My mother's gaze softens as it lands on me, but her worry is evident. "Just explain this to your father. If he hears..."

"I know. I know. He'll throw a f*****g tantrum." My dad is a hard man to please but being the family f**k up means that disappointment is just expected.

I remember screwing up on a deal a few years back. We lost some money, minuscule in comparison to the amount we make. I was stupid, attempted to cover it up instead of just admitting my mistake.

The truth is I was scared of him. Of hearing how much I disappoint him, of how I need to grow up again, of why I can't just be like my brothers and sister.

He found it. He killed someone for it, thinking they were the one who covered up the lost. I never admitted it. I just watched my father shoot someone, stone faced and walk out the room without a second glance back.

Yes, I've killed. I've seen everyone in my family do the same, but that time was different. My father didn't wait a second, he just pulled the trigger and walked away.

I've always known my family were the bad guys, but until then I don't think it ever truly hit me with what that meant.

Girls like Emery can't be with men like me. Not without being hurt themselves.

Tessa is an example with that, trapped with the loss of my brother forever, haunted by that grief because she fell in love with one of us. I've seen my mother suffer the same, Kiara...I don't want to happen to me or someone I love.

I'd sacrifice a future with someone, a family, just so I don't have to ever experience that pain. That's how selfish and cowardly I am.

And that's why I regret giving Emery my phone. If she calls...fuck, I have to say no. If she wants to go out with me, if she's hoping to see me again, the only logical solution is to say I can't. To hurt her, but less than what would happen than if we ever fell in love.

"I'm going to bed." I announce, tearing myself from the couch. My mom tries to help me walk but I do it myself, needing my own self pity and solitude of being alone than anything else.

"If you need anything..."

"I know mom." She flashes me a small smile, and watches me struggle up the stairs. I make it, my right side still on fire.

The pain shoots up and down my body, so I pop a few more pills and wash it down with left over water sitting on my desk from god knows when.

My room is the same, covered in my old pictures of hot women scantily dressed and lounging on vintage cars or motorbikes. I was such an i***t then.

I screw up a couple of them and throw them in the bin. Then I grab some of the comics still on the desk and flick through them. In another life, I would have owned my own comic book shop.

I think I would have loved it.

Maybe found a cute geek like me? Gotten a dog together and moved into a shitty apartment over the store? Moved out when she fell pregnant? Had maybe one more and called our family complete?

Kalen always wanted that. He almost had it, until the dark forces that like to ruin our lives hit him hard. A single gunshot to the head, and he was gone. His family destroyed, his little girl left fatherless.

Kieron is a different breed. He loves our family, values loyalty way too much to ever truly escape, but he recognised his limits. He sat down with our dad and told him he couldn't be the leader he was raised to become.

He didn't want it all, only part. My father strangely agreed to it with no stipulations and the mantle passed to my sister and her husband. Together they rule over the kingdom now, my brother and me as her loyal soldiers.

I'm happy with that. But I always wonder why he didn't ask me. I was next in line. I might have wanted it, I might have said yes. It could have forced me to mature, to live for something more than meaningless s*x and partying.

When he announced Kiara and Aaron would be taking other, I just couldn't help but wonder, why not me?

Was I not f*****g good enough dad?

The comic book ends up crumpled and ripped in my hands. I've never been an angry person, so when the emotion consumes me, the effects are so unexpected and quick I don't even register them.

I throw the wrecked paper aside and stare up at the ceiling. That's when the phone starts buzzing. It's stuffed inside an empty drawer but I already know who's on the other end and it f*****g terrifies me.

My hands snatch the device and press answer before I can even think. Didn't I just come up with the resolution to leave this poor girl alone?

Great Kai, you f****d up again.

"Emery, hey listen I made a mistake and I shouldn't have..." Her soft cries echo from the other line. My words disappear and I focus on the pain it emanates.

Her tears are fresh but not because of me. She's in pain, meaning someone f*****g hurt her. I clutch the phone so hard it almost snaps, and when she speaks next, I'm already leaving my room.

"I need you." She whispers, so broken I have no idea how to help her piece back together.

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A/N: I love writing Aaron and Kiara!! Deffo one of my favourite couples I've ever written!!

Thoughts on Kai??

What do you think has happened to Emery?