Learning to Be Human (FREE READ)

Chapter 3: Oh Jay!

You know, sometimes I'd wish to be woken up by soft sunlight rays, birds chirping, all of that good stuff. But nope. I live in LA. Where it feels like a dang desert even though we are near the beach! Birds were considered spy cams from the government, and if we are to express our opinions we would get back lashed by those who oppose that statement.

"Good morning, Katie," Jay sat on the edge of my bed.

"Oh my god!" I squealed, completely forgetting that the whole thing yesterday was not a dream after all.

"Jay, what time is it?" I brushed my morning hair curtains to the side.

"It is 7:30AM," he responded.

"That's weird..."

"How is it weird?" he asked.

"I was thinking you would say some long scientific phrase about the time. It sounded too simple to be coming from you," I rubbed my eyes.

"I've been studying while you slept," he said proudly.

"Studying?" I yawned and stretched my arms.

"Yes," he then dropped books on top of my lap, "I have gone over the latest version of the English dictionary, the thesaurus, and other related materials to speaking the tongue."

"You did that all in one night?!" I exclaimed.

"Yes, I was able to flip through the pages and retrieve all the information. Right now, I am just about done with learning the basic behaviors of the human being," he pointed at the red cover.

I was astonished. I myself probably don't know more than half of the words in the dictionary. I found it rather impressive.

Impressive that he's cheating!

I huffed, "Jay, please do not tell anyone else that you can do this. If they find you to be too smart at an alarming rate they're probably going to eliminate you."

"It is strange that humans turn to that as a solution when they could very much use greater knowledge for positive use," Jay got up and took the books.

"You know if it was that simple, maybe we would have accomplished to be at your rate," I got up and miraculously decided to make my bed. Because you know, I have a guest.

"I have also made you breakfast, hope you desire it," he left into the other room.

Would I ever!

But I began to think to myself. If he really did not sleep all night and was able to learn everything, then for how long would he need my help?

I walked on over to the tiny kitchenette and, to my amazement, this man placed a whole plate with bacon, eggs, and pancakes. He even got fancy and sifted confectioners sugar on top! The syrup oozed and was drizzled perfectly. The egg yolks were not broken, and the bacon was perfectly crispy. The sweet and salty aroma filled my nostrils and my stomach growled to head towards it.

"Did you learn overnight to be Chef Ramsay or something?" I sat down and grabbed a fork.

"I could," he sat down.

He continued, "You know what's interesting. This dish consists of a lot of sodium chloride (NaCL), or salt. But, the thing is... when both of these elements are separated or on their own they are considered hazardous. But, when put together, they make your everyday food ingredient. Ironic, isn't it?"

"I failed chemistry, so I wouldn't know," I gobbled down the stack of pancakes. My soul was sent to heaven after my tongue touched the fluffiness.

So good!

"This syrup contains high sugars, those pancakes have sugar too, and then to top it off... powdered sugar on top," Jay was more fascinated by the chemical reactions of food.

"I'm here for a good time, not a long time," I gulped down the orange juice he placed for me.

No really... I don't have a long time.

"The human breakfast meals aren't considered healthy," Jay crossed his arms.

"In America it isn't," I corrected, "There are different places in the world that eat different things in the morning."

"Really?" his eyes lit up, "Fascinating!"

"Yeah," I almost choked while eating more pancakes, "We have different diversities in culture, language, traditions, etc."

"So there is more complex things to learn," he seemed enthusiastic about that challenge.

Jay paused, "It's odd though..." he began to ponder, "Humans are not like other species."

No we aren't.

He looked at me, "I studied that a percentage of humans adore and take care of what is called a pet cat."

"That's true," I answered, poking at my eggs.

"So are humans like cats? Are they of the same traits and species, just different fur coats?" Jay asked.

"It's not that simple," although I wished it was, "It's hard to explain."

"I am sorry," he apologized, "It's rude to talk while eating."

"No, no..." I shook my head, "It's okay with me, I am just not sure how to differentiate between humans and cats right now."

I used a big word! Hah!

Before Javon left into the bedroom, he said, "The goal is for everyone to love the cats equally."

I really wish it was that simple.

As I finished my scrumptious breakfast, I sat down and thought about what Jay had said.

To love humans equally... no matter the race or color of their coats... which is their skins. That would be the day world peace could finally be achieved.

I am appreciative to know that at least Jay wasn't an evil alien at most.

Then I heard a knock on the door. A really loud one too.

I rushed over to answer and it was the land-lady!

"Katie, you are past due for the second month. If we do not receive payment by the end of the week, then we will have to proceed with eviction," she regretfully stated.

Oh my gosh! I totally forgot! Again!

I asked her to hold on so I could get the money, "I can pay one month but I'll have the back pay for the other by the end of this week. One moment."

I turned and instantly froze.

"Hey Katie, am i wearing this right?" Jay asked.

Right before my damn eyes, Jay was wearing my lingerie! Not that I had anyone to wear it for, but it was for self-esteem therapy.

"Jay!" I silently screeched at him, "Put that back!"

"It's a little loose around the waist maybe it goes like thi-"

"Who is that?" the land-lady asked, "Do you have company over? You know it's against policy to- Oh my god!" she gasped as she saw what I did.

Luckily Jay was wearing the lingerie over his clothes, but still!

"Who is that?" she repeated.

"This is my friend, we were just leaving," I stomped over and pouted at him.

"What? I was beginning to smell funny so thought I would take a shower," he bounced his shoulders.

"Now is not the time," I snatched my wallet from the table beside of him, "Take it off now!"

"Okay," he sighed.

I turned around and headed towards the door trying to figure out what I could say to her. She was still staring, but not at me!

He's taking off more than the lingerie this time huh?

I hesitantly turned around and Javon was in the midst of taking off his shirt!

"You two aren't dating?" she asked.

"No!" I coughed, "God no!"

"Oh?" she sounded surprised and interested, "What's his name?"

"Javon, ma'am," he bowed to her from afar, "Nice to meet you."

I looked at him and then back at her, she switched from business to flirty, "Oh, a gentleman. I like what I see."

"Ms.Juvia..." I tried to snap her attention back to me. I held out the month's rent in cash in my hand.

"Oh right," she buzzed and looked back at me, "So we still got last month's rent to pay..." her gaze drifted off again. And I know to whom.

It was like I wasn't even there! She bit her lip and her lashes fluttered. I looked back and Jay was doing the same thing too? Uh- what?

"We will get you the money by the end of the week," I dragged on, "Please, have a good day."

"Or you could get me a date with that hunk," she made a rawrch expression and I had to hold the cringe inside me.

Juvia left shortly, and I quietly shut the door behind us.

"Jay!" I was able to release my tones of concerns, "Why'd you do that?"

"There was nothing to wear of interest, but then I found that clothing... if you would say it is barely any clothing?" he lifted an eyebrow.

"Please don't touch my clothes, especially my undergarments!" I hissed.

Jay nodded in understanding.

"By the way," my eyebrows twitched, "Why did you mirror her expressions?"

"I was studying the facial expressions she made to match the words I learned in the dictionary. So far, her reaction was categorized under the description of lust?" Jay was puzzled.

"Yes, lust..." this was getting awkward with every second that went by, "Please becareful, some expressions are not meant to be mirrored."

Because if he met people who gave him an unpleasant expression, and he returned it back, oh well, there will be trouble. And the last thing I want to happen is for trouble to stain our names.

"So how do humans reproduce?" he added.

"I am not explaining the birds and the bees with you," I shook my head.

I mean, I really couldn't!

I sighed, "Let's head out. I need to DoorDash to make up last month's rent."

"You must pay for housing?" Jay scratched his head.

"In the future we may have to pay to breathe!" I sarcastically joked.

"There's so much for me to learn, but... I am still lingering with this unpleasant smell," he gestured to his armpits.

"Oh, right! Well I don't technically have any men's clothing, but I do have an oversize hoodie and sweatpants. Don't worry, they have ties to tighten for your size," I pulled them out of the closet, "Please don't use too much of my shampoo."

After we had taken our turns in the shower we headed off to my moped.

"Ahhh the light year traveling machine," I joked.

"Do you want me not to use my power? I mean the sun is up," he offered.

Actually...

I turned on my dasher app and saw that there were a lot of businesses to pick up from. I agreed for Javon to test his powers and we went zooming!

I didn't care if the trips didn't tip, because we exerted so much service with time that took less than a blink of an eye! By the end of the afternoon, I looked into my earnings section.

$12,000?!

That was way more than enough for rent. In fact, I would buy a damn car! When we stopped to gas for the day I looked over at Jay.

"Thank you," I was almost about to cry, "This is a lot of money. Maybe we can move out to a better space."

Jay said nothing but smiled.

Then I felt my phone vibrating. Comments and reviews started popping up on the DoorDash app!

"Extremely fast service... It was like she teleported here... I wish I could've tipped..." I read in awe.

"Or we could just move into mine," he suggested.

I stopped.

Jay scratched the back of his head, "Yeah, I did some research on myself. Apparently, I own a home in a place called Beverly Hills..."

The song "Beverly Hills" by Weezer started to ring in my head.

"Why didn't you just say so!" I punched him on his arm playfully. It hurt. He had rock hard muscles and I had extremely fragile hands.

"I wanted to make sure you weren't a threat, but I had fun today," he punched me back playfully! It hurt! He didn't know his own strength, I almost flew!

"Ow!" I winced.

"Oh!" his eyes shifted with worry, "Did I hurt you?"

"It's okay," I rubbed my soon to be bruised arm, "It wasn't intentional."