This blissful moment will never end. It will never. Then I realized, it will leave. Being succeeded by sadness -- never ending sadness -- at late night, on midnight, whenever you'll realize. When you'll open your eyes to life -- the beautiful yet miserable gift. That thing taking a drift. That thing, now, covered with dirt.
You would see how much unfair it is. Pushing all people away -- ignoring their pains, believing yours was worse than anyone's.
But no one could blame me nor you, if we both felt like that. No one knows our pain but us, us alone. We're both alone -- we're not alone.
You would realize that no one would care until you're lying inside, skin-cold, chapped lips, nice gown -- being praised.
Goodness is appreciated then,
Loving support and prayers -- fact is they didn't care when you were still standing -- trying to stand tall --- ended up tumbling -- trying again with heavy weights of pain in your muscles. When the emptiness hurts inside -- you're bleeding and they ignored.
Simply and dull -- they didn't care. Cheers for overthinking, again. I hate it. It sucks. Being damnedest. Being stupidest. I'm both -- and am bored and empty.
I tried to stop it but it won't stop.
"Breathe in, breathe out." Nothing works. None. Thinking would fell deeper.
"Calm down --- calm down-- " the mantra inside. Where should I hide?
I have to get away. I have to get away from me. I'm becoming what I've feared of. This isn't me anymore. Am becoming irresponsible. What would became of me?
Who knows?
Oh God please help me.