Mascara Tears [ON HOLD]

2. Of Teenage Girls and Secret Thoughts

Ava

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‘Bye Genevieve.’ Ava gave her little sister a peck on the cheek before rustling her hair.

Genevieve in turn smiled back at her with twinkling eyes. Despite the frustrations that haunted her mind Ava found that she could find peace in her little sister’s warm smiles.

‘Hurry up Ava, you’ll be late for your last day of school.’ Her mother called from inside the car, still parked in their narrow driveway.

Ava gave her sister one last pat before picking up her bag and rushing off with a shout of farewell to her father who grunted in response.

‘You ought to lose at least a tiny bit of your intentional tardiness before the year is-’

‘I know ma.’ She cut her mother off. ‘University and Exams and all that. I’ll be fine, besides, Genny won’t be with me there so I have to give her all the pampering she deserves now.’

‘You still have a whole three months for that.’ She said, clicking her seatbelt into place. ‘Exams are what you should be worrying about. You are not fully accepted until you actually make those you know?’

‘Mom, I know. I can handle it.’

Her mother turned and looked at her, teary-eyes filled with worry and pride. She reached out her hand and stroke her daughter’s cheek.

‘I know you can, sweetheart.’

Ava shied away and looked out the window instead, her mother chuckled.

‘Oh, and I don’t get to pamper my little girl with compliments?’

‘I’m not little.’ Ava protested, turning back to find her mother smiling.

‘Seatbelt.’ She said, causing Ava feeling like she’d lost an argument before it even started.

It seemed that no matter her age she would remain a child to her mother.

The car’s engine groaned as the car came to life and her mother expertly manoeuvred it out of the driveway. Ava caught sight of her father waving at them and she waved back until he disappeared from view.

*

‘Can you believe it? It’s the last day of class!’ Hazel exclaimed, giggly eyed and as overenthusiastic as she’d always been.

‘There are still exams you know.’ Ava reminded her, taking her last book out of her locker.

‘You are always looking at the downside of things Ava. At least celebrate not having to spend seven hours at school every single day!’ Nevaeh responded. She was tall, voluptuous and very fond of makeup.Despite the boy’s constant disapproval of too much makeup she still managed to get more than her fair share of love confessions on a daily basis.

‘Let her whine all she wants Nev, She’s probably just a bit nervous since she wants to get into that engineering course of hers.’ Hazel said, ever so cheery.

‘You’ve already been accepted though, haven’t you?’ Nevaeh asked.

‘Provisionally…let’s stop talking about it ok? You guys are right, we should enjoy today. It’ll be the last day we get to attend a class together.’ Ava answered.

Before any of her two friends could comment on her cringey sentiment a young looking boy came dashing down the hallway and stopped abruptly when he spotted their little group lounging by the lockers.

‘Final assembly starts in five minutes. You should start walking to the hall.’ He announced, before dashing off to go find other stragglers.

Ava heaved her now stuffed bag and started for the hall she caught Hazel still staring at the boy as he ran and rolled her eyes.

‘Really?’

‘What?’ Hazel responded with put upon sheepishness. ‘He’s kind of cute. Wouldn’t hurt to make out with a junior before I left.’ She winked.

‘Is that all you ever think about Hazel?’ Nevaeh joshed.

‘Well you don’t have to think about it since it’s guaranteed to happen anyways. I kind of get jealous of how you barely have to try.’ Havel responded with mock sadness.

‘Some would argue that she tries too hard.’ Ava said, prompting some laughter from Hazel.

‘And you do not try at all, leaving high school without having had a single relationship. It should be considered a sin or something.’ Hazel said before Nevaeh could defend herself.

She was now walking backwards so she could face the two of them, a habit both Ava and Nevaeh had had to get used to.

‘Who knows? Maybe they won’t allow me to graduate until I pass in that department.’ Ava shrugged.

The laughed.

‘I’m sure you’ll graduate, your stalker boy counts doesn’t he?’ Nevaeh said, still laughing.

‘Yeah whatever happened to him?’

Ava took an awkward step as if she’d been the one walking backwards, her laughter cut short.

‘I keep telling you guys not to bring that up.’ She said, suddenly serious.

She hurried her pace and walked past Hazel who share a look with Nevaeh before they both ran up to catch up with her again.

‘Sorry.’ Hazel apologised for them.

Ava nodded and they kept walking, their conversation drifting to teacher attires and other such gossip. All the while Ava thought about her ‘stalker’ boy. She didn’t like talking about him. His existence only belonged in her thoughts. He was a part of them, part of a world where no one else was welcome. It was an uncertain world of doubt and fear that she kept well-guarded. One that was only safe and comfortable because it did not exist and remained in her thoughts. But she had drunk one too many glasses of wine during an evening out with friends and the alcohol had washed away her walls and allowed a piece of her world to slip out. The fact that she might not see her friends again actually made her happy. She hoped that they would forget that piece of her secret world and leave it only to her. These were after all, her thoughts.

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