His Conundrums

Chapter 43

White Lies

It was a quarter before five o’clock in the afternoon. Sirius quietly stared at his coffee. He looked at the window like he always did. People are walking fast, wanting to go home or have a nice drink after work. He thought about the things before he got into an accident. Does he also enjoy the time off from work? Does he enjoy dinner with his friends or his family? Did he like coffee that much?

“You’re so deep in your thoughts. You’re gonna get old too fast if you keep doing that.”

“Have you ever enjoyed your time working on the field, Mr. Lauve?” he asked without looking away from the scenery the city can only offer.

“It became my life,” he answered.

“Everyone is working for their passion, for money, for their name, is it really worth it?”

“If you enjoyed doing so, of course.” Mr. Lauve answered.

“Enjoy?” he asked.

He sighed.

“I was. I was once treated like a precious stone, a genius in my own field. I enjoyed working as much as you enjoyed serving your country,” he said.

“And serving us your hot coffee,” he faced the old man sitting across him. He smiled.

“But these days, I felt empty. I thought I could go back to who I was before, but I was mistaken. I was strong and brave before the accident broke me into pieces.” He stared at the hot espresso served in front of him as it turns cold.

“My doctor asked me if I keep having those nightmares, and I lied. I still have them haunting me every time I tried to close my eyes. I guess I have to live with it for the rest of my life. He keeps on giving me medicine for my headaches, but I stopped taking them after your case was solved. It doesn’t do the favor. The pain never ceases. I know myself that I’m not getting better.”

“I don’t know to what extent your trauma pains you. I also have my trauma myself, and I think it’s not that far different from you. I saw each of my colleagues died every time we have to cross the battlefield. Every day we lose one, we lose two, until the day I lose them all. But look at me, I live carrying all those pains, carrying those painful memories that carved into my heart, but I get to carry all their wishes, to see our country free from greed and evil. Though we can’t completely exterminate it, I was lucky to get to see how people peacefully sleeping at night, without fear from the foreign attack.”

Mr. Lauve held Sirius’s hands.

“You live because you have fought your battle. Now, you have to move forward.”

The moon was ready to light the entire city from the darkness. The place was hyped with colorful lights and a loud crowd, but the conversation is too bad to be interrupted. Joe didn’t mean to overhear it from the outside. He himself is broken. He might end up sitting on the corner and not be able to speak if he went in. He decided to walk somewhere far—someplace where he can temporarily forget his own pain.

“I guess I’ll work tomorrow,” he said to himself, hiding the piece of small information he gathered from wandering around the campus earlier.

-0-0-0-

She walked in with her eyes looking forward. She never laid her eyes on what’s on her sides. She needs to make her entrance, and they need to make way for her. She was walking towards a club room where she bet he always spent his morning spare time, to the research club.

She opened the door, and her guess was correct. She found Gauntler sitting on the reading corner. She raised her right eyebrow.

“If you’re going to raise your eyebrow like that, I may not be able to concentrate on my research,” Gauntler told her.

She walked in and carelessly threw her bag on the table.

“Woah, why you’re such in a bad mood today, honey?” he asked her.

“I thought I was just guessing, and maybe I was right, were cheating with that cheerleader, but I never thought it’s not just me anymore. The whole campus is spreading rumors about it. Do you have another explanation for that?” She asked.

“Luna, it’s just rumors, okay? We’ve been in a relationship for almost two years. Are you starting to doubt me now?” he defended himself.

“That’s the problem. We’ve been in a relationship for 2 years. I know you Gauntler, I know your past relationships didn’t last that long,” she said.

“Yes, and you’re the first one I’ve been the longest. I bet you also knew that I have to end the other one every time I enter another relationship, but I never ended it up with you. I’m still with you,” he explained.

Luna looked at him with fierce on her eyes but later chose to understand the situation.

“My family’s been in a conflict with theirs for I don’t know since when and people love the idea of filling in gaps on their mind trying to solve their puzzles. If the policemen came and I were to get questioned about her death, I bet they’ll try to make it look like I did it, and I don’t want that,” she cried.

“I know. See? People are spreading lies trying to connect you and me with her death, but I know you’re innocent, honey. Trust me, we are. You’re with me, okay?” he leaned closer to her and hugged her.

-0-0-0-

“Should I tell Sirius about what I heard this morning?” Joe asked Jazel.

He was sitting and thinking in his apartment with his mannequin sitting across him.

“If I caught you were cheating on me, Jazel, I’ll throw you out in this apartment, you hear me?” he asked her.

“Well, I know you won’t do that, and I promise you I won’t cheat on you either, so we’re good, okay?”

He put his hand under his chin and looked at the window. The night sky is solemn, with stars shining bright.

“Do the stars tell lies with each other, too? Or people tell lies to us about them?” he asked himself.