100%: the Story of a Patriot

Section 9

Section 9Peter found that he was something of a personality inthishospital. He was the “star” witness in the sensationalGoober case, about which the whole city, and in fact the wholecountry was talking. It was known that he had “turnedState’s”; but just what he knew and what he had toldwas a mighty secret, and Peter “held his mouth” andlooked portentous, and enjoyed thrills of self-importance.

But meantime there was no reason why he should not listen toothers talk; no reason why he should not inform himself fully aboutthis case, so that in future he might be able to take care ofhimself. He listened to what “Old Man” Doobman had tosay, and to what Jan Christian, his Swedish assistant had to say,and to what Gerald Leslie, the “coke” fiend, had tosay. All these, and others, had friends on the outside, people whowere “in the know.” Some told one thing, and otherstold exactly the opposite; but Peter put this and that together,and used his own intrigue-sharpened wits upon it, and before longhe was satisfied that he had got the facts.

Jim Goober was a prominentlabor leader. He had organized theemployees of the Traction Trust, and had called and led atremendous strike. Also he had called building strikes, and somepeople said he had used dynamite upon uncompleted buildings, andmade a joke of it. Anyhow, the business men of the city wanted toput him where he could no longer trouble them; and when some maniacunknown had flung a dynamite bomb into the path of the Preparednessparade, the big fellows of the city had decided that now was theopportunity they wereseeking. Guffey, the man who had taken chargeof Peter, was head of the secret service of the Traction Trust, andthe big fellows had put him in complete charge. They wanted action,and would take no chances with the graft-ridden and incompetentpolice ofthe city. They had Goober in jail, with his wife and threeof his gang, and thru the newspapers of the city they were carryingon a propaganda to prepare the public for the hanging of allfive.

And that was all right, of course; Jim Goober was only a nametoPeter, and of less importance than a single one of Peter’smeals. Peter understood what Guffey had done, and his only grudgewas because Guffey had not had the sense to tell him his story atthe beginning, instead of first nearly twisting his armoff.However, Peter reflected, no doubt Guffey had meant to teachhim a lesson, to make sure of him. Peter had learned the lesson,and his purpose now was to make this clear to Guffey and toDoobman.

“Hold your mouth,” Guffey had said, and Peter neveronce saida word about the Goober case. But, of course, he talkedabout other matters. A fellow could not go around like a mummy allday long, and it was Peter’s weakness that he liked to tellabout his exploits, the clever devices by which he had outwittedhis last “Old Man.” So to Gerald Leslie, the“coke” fiend, he told the story of Pericles Priam, andhow many thousands of dollars he had helped to wheedle out of thepublic, and how twice he and Pericles had been arrested forswindling. Also he told about the Temple of Jimjambo, and all thestrange and incredible things that had gone on there. Pashtian elKalandra, who called himself the Chief Magistrian of EleutherinianExoticism, gave himself out to his followers to be eighty years ofage, butas a matter of fact he was less than forty. He was supposedto be a Persian prince, but had been born in a small town inIndiana, and had begun life as a grocer-boy. He was supposed tolive upon a handful of fruit, but every day it had beenPeter’s job to assist in the preparation of a largebeef-steak or a roast chicken. These were “for sacrificialpurposes,” so the prophet explained to his attendants; andPeter would get the remains of the sacrificial beef-steaks andchickens, and would sacrificially devour them behind thepantrydoor. That had been one of his private grafts, which he got inreturn for keeping secret from the prophet some of the stealings ofTushbar Akrogas, the major-domo.

A wonderful place had been this Temple of Jimjambo. There weremystic altars with seven veils before them, and thru these theChief Magistrian would appear, clad in a long cream-colored robewith gold and purple borders, and with pink embroidered slippersand symbolic head-dress. His lectures and religious rites had beenattended by hundreds—many of them rich society women, whocame rolling up to the temple in their limousines. Also there hadbeen a school, where children had been initiated into the mysticrites of the cult. The prophet would take these children into hisprivate apartments, and there were awful rumors—which hadended in the raiding of the temple by the police, and the flight ofthe prophet, and likewise of the majordomo, and of Peter Gudge, hisscullion and confederate.

Also, Peter thought it was fun to tell Gerald Leslie about hisadventures with the Holy Rollers, into whose church he had driftedduring his search for a job. Peter had taken up with this sect, andlearned the art of “talking in tongues,” and how tofall over the back of your chair in convulsions of celestialglory.Peter had gained the confidence of the Rev. Gamaliel Lunk, and hadbeen secretly employed by him to carry on a propaganda among thecongregation to obtain a raise in salary for the underpaidconvulsionist. But certain things which Peter had learnedhad causedhim to go over to the faction of Shoemaker Smithers, who was tryingto persuade the congregation that he could roll harder and fasterthan the Rev. Gamaliel. Peter had only held this latter job a fewdays before he had been fired for stealing the fried doughnut.