I Can't Stand You, Sherlock

Chapter 23: Away From Safety

I woke up in my bed at Walter's and Ameila's house. I pushed myself up and felt the room spin. I was going to vomit. I swung my legs over the bed and then ran to the bathroom. After I lost pretty much everything I ate yesterday I walked out of the bathroom and into the kitchen. I looked at the time, it was 12:00. Wow, ok, where was everyone? I think it was Saturday, or was it Monday?

I held my head in my hands and thought about what I did yesterday and what Walter said to me or what I could remember out of the conversation. He was right, I was out of control. I had my time to morn, now this is just childish games. I needed to out of this rut I was in. This town was bringing out the worse in me. I can't remember the last time I acted like this and it wasn't for this long either. I couldn't keep acting like this. I needed structure back in my life again. I needed to figure out what I was going to do. What was going to be my next plan?

I had to leave, the sooner the better. But where could I go? I had nowhere else to go too. I knew I needed help, this group was big and I couldn't bring it down alone.

I sighed and sat down at the kitchen table to think. I couldn't just leave without saying goodbye like I did last time. But I didn't want to tell them in person that I was leaving because I had given them more trouble then I should have. I didn't deserve to say to goodbye at least not like that. I had to leave a note this time or something of the sort.

Before I knew what I was doing I walked back into my room and got a paper and a pencil. I walked back into the kitchen and started to write.

Deal Walter and Ameila,

Thank you so much for everything you have done for me. Thank you for finding me and telling me that my nan died. I owe you guys so much and I know this is how I should repay you. I know by time you read this I will be gone. I need to and don't try to find me again. I need my space. This town is not good for me right now. I will contact you when I am ready.

You guys have always been there for me. You truly are good friends.

Maire

As soon as I signed my name my hands were shaking. I was kind of scared, I didn't know what to do now. What was I going to do? Turn myself in or runaway?

I walked back into my room and packed my things and put on my bright yellow running shoes and headed out the door, unknown where I was going.

"I only have 90 quid on me." I pleaded the ticket seller for the boat back to England.

"Sorry sweet, it's 100."

"Please." I said holding back tears in my eyes as the words to charm him were not coming to my mind. I felt broken and I was sure that I wasn't the same person that got off this boat a month ago.

"Just move over and let these people go through." He said and made a jester with his hands signaling me to move.

I looked around at all the people waiting in line for the boat. There were at least 15. I could pick pocket any of these people but for some reason I didn't feel confident enough to do it. What if they caught on to what I was doing and they yell and I get sent to the jail. If that happened I couldn't save anyone.

For the first time in a long time I felt scared and I couldn't hide it. I walked off away from the people and I sank to my knees and started to cry. I was going to be stuck here.

"Maire!" I heard someone call my name. I refused to look to see who called me, not wanting to show my face to them. I wasn't the normal me. I felt ashamed on how I was acting. "Maire!"

By the second time they called, I finally looked up to see Walter and Ameila running up to me.

"We got your note!" Ameila said once they were in front of me.

"Yeah." I shrugged as I wiped my eyes.

"It's better than the last time you left us but why can't you just say it to our face?" Walter said and offered his hand to help me up from the ground.

I eyed it for a second and took it. "How did you know I was here?"

"Lucky guess." Walter shrugged.

"You're going to need some cash to get back." Ameila said and handed me an envelope.

I looked in it and saw there was at least another 160 quid in it. I gave them a small smile and said, "thank you. I have no idea what I did to deserve you two in my life." Out of all the trouble I have given them the past a couple weeks or so I just couldn't believe that they would do this for me.

Walter and Amelia smiled. "Just be safe. And call us when you get to where you need to go. We want to know if you are safe." Walter said and hugged me.

I hugged him back and before Walter let go, Ameila got into the hug, making it a group hug.

After a minute they let go and smiled at me, "now go and sort out what you need too." Ameila said to me.

I looked at the dates, times, and places that the trains were going to within England. I still wasn't quite sure if it was the smartest idea to go back to London. I missed that town more than I would care to admit. I missed the people there, the food, and the sights. I knew once I was there, once I was home, I would get the help I needed. I couldn't believe I would be saying this but Sherlock could help me.

A part of me told my other self that if I went back, I would get back to normal. Right now I felt weak and broken like a little child. I needed something to shape me back to what I was before I left.

I walked over to the ticket master and smiled politely at him. "So what will it be?" the man said behind the desk.

"9 o'clock to London." I said firmly as if I knew the choice I was making was the right one.

"Sure thing miss, that will be 50 pounds." He said.

I shoved my hand in my pocket and pulled out the last bit of money I had left and handed it over. I was starving but I only have about 2 pounds left in my pocket. Maybe I could get a bag of crisps on my way out.

The air was warmer here in London than in Ireland. It was nice. The cold breeze mixed with the warmer weather, hit my face, I missed it. I walked slowly down a road that I knew all too well. My mind ran with what I was going to tell him when I saw him. Oh hey, I'm back to stay and I need your help. Oh yeah, that will fly, not. My legs stopped at the front door of a house next to a little bakery.

"Here we go." I said under my breath and walked up the door. I stood there for a minute, trying to work out my thoughts until I heard voices from the other side.

"I'm not your house maid Sherlock." A sweet voice said on the other side of the door.

"But I am on a verge of something big! I don't have time to do the house cleaning now." Sherlock's deep voice radiated.

"You always say that." She yelled back at him. I could tell she was in her kitchen.

A smile came to my face as I realized that nothing changed. It was still the same. I put my hand on the handle and turned it. To my regret, the door was locked. I almost forgot, my key, it was in my pocket. I took it with me when I went Dublin. I stuffed my hand into my left pocket of my jeans and put it into the key hole then turned the handle.

"Lestrade, good, you're here. He's up stairs." Miss Hudson said in the kitchen, not even bothering to come out of greet me.

I nodded at her, knowing that I should keep an eye out for Lestrade who seemed to be coming at some point soon. "Thanks." I said in the hall way, waiting for Miss Hudson to catch on that it wasn't him.

"Rori? Are you here?" she burst through the door with a huge smile on her face. "Oh dear! It's been a while!" she gave me a tight hug and then said, "what brings you back?"

"A lot of things. I'll tell you sometime soon about it but right now I need to talk to Sherlock."

"Sure, he's been erratic, he has, well more than normal." She said and looked upstairs with a frown. "He's not be acting like himself since you left."

That makes two of us. "I can say the same about myself." I said as grabbed the railing to the stairs and started to walk up.

I walked into 221B flat to see Sherlock with a huge pair of earmuffs over his ears as he tore up pieces up paper while staring out the front window. I didn't have a clue what this 'experiment' was but I wanted to know.

"Sherlock." I said loud enough for him to hear me.

Not even a second later, his head snapped around to look at me from across the room. He stared at me for a minute, as if not sure if I was here or not. Then a small smile came to his face as he walked over to greet me.

"I didn't think you would come back." He said quite loudly with his earmuffs still on.

I pointed to his earmuffs singling to take them off before I said anymore. I wanted him to give me full attention. He made a face of realization and took them off and tossed them on the floor.

"It's a long story. But in short, I need your help and fast." I said to him, knowing that the lady was going to start killing people in a matter of days.

"You need my help?" He asked, repeating the question.

"Yes." I nodded at him. I wouldn't have come if I didn't.

"Ok." He said firmly and then paused, tilting his head as he looked back at me, "Lestrade is downstairs. He's coming to pick me up for a case. Hide in your room until he's gone and go get John. I'll be back in a couple hours." He said in a rushed voice.

As if command I heard slow and steady steps coming up the stairs. Sherlock didn't need to tell me twice. I ran into my old room and closed the door softly. I put my ear to the door and within a minute I heard Lestrade voice say, "are you ready?"

"Yes." Sherlock's voice said.

"Good, we really need you on this one." Lestrade said and then I heard the door close. I could say the same thing about myself. I really did need him.