Christmas' Misery

Chapter eleven

[Christmas]

I left here alone in Duke's office because he have to answer an important call in the meeting room that is only at the next door. We just done eating our lunch and I'm still drinking the Espresso that his secretary bought. The way Cheena look at me as she gave my Espresso, seems she wants to kill me with her stares. It was pretty obvious she doesn't like me. I heaved a sign as I leaned my back in the couch, sipping the last drop of my Espresso.

I waited Duke almost 15 minutes before he came back wearing his frown face. My forehead knotted as I watched him heading at his desk. He sat in his swivel chair, massaging his temple like I wasn't here.

“Ahm, what's the problem?” I asked and if I didn't speak he wouldn't notice me.

Duke immediately stood up at his seat and slapped his forehead. “I'm sorry, Christmas, I forgot that you were here.” He apologized and walk towards me.

I faked a laugh. “It's okay not a big deal.” I said and smiled a little to him. “So, what's with the frown face, hmm?” I signalled him to sit beside me.

“Lysias called me,” he said, leaning himself in the headboard.

“Oh, is that your fiance–”

“Ex-fiancee,” he corrected me, “Yeah, she is.” he added.

“Okay,” the only word I uttered, pretending that I'm checking the time in my wrist watch.

A silence fell in our atmosphere and no one dare to talk. It seems one of us are waiting who will talk first. I want to tell him that I'm going home because I'm already done here. I already gave him the lunch and we even ate it together but I don't know why my mouth doesn't want to speak.

“It was Lysias who called me,” Duke suddenly broke the silence,“She knew about you and she was mad, tsk. As if that woman really care.”

As I heard what he said, my heart felt aches. He still has a feeling. “Why are you telling me that?” I asked without facing him.

I can see at my peripheral view that he is looking at me now. “Because I want you to know, Christmas.”

I nodded. “You still love her, right?” This time, I faced him, looking directly at his eyes.

He shrugged his shoulder and averted his eyes at the ceiling. “All I feel is hatred for her. I spent all the years we had been together by putting all my love to her then she will pay me back by cheating on me? What's wrong with her?! If she is just going to cheat on me after all these years, she should have done it in the first place when our relationship are just going to start.” He said frustratingly.

“Maybe there is a reason why this happened to you.” I said in the lower of my voice.

He chuckled. “That is what in my thought. Everything has a reason and I think I know what is that reason.”

My cheeks painted in red as he look at me with dazzling in his eyes. “Hehehe.” The only stupid word I ever replied on someone. My heart seems what to run out on my chest!

He start laughing out loud. “Hahaha! What's with your reaction?”

I faked a laugh, pretending I am joining him. “Ahm. I think I have to go. I'm already done here.” I said and stood up.

“Wait!” He grabbed my hand that made me sit back on the couch.

I gave him a questioning look. “W-what?”

“I want to invite you at the house tonight. Stay with me, Christmas. I want you,” he said sounded begging, “I don't know why you keep on coming on my mind but all I know is want to be with you.” he added and I can see at his eyes the sincerity.

“B-bu–”

Duke intertwined our hand tightly. “Please, Christmas, stay with me. I never been this way before and you are the only person who rocked my whole world this way.”

I gripped my lower lip while looking at his pleasing face. I don't know what he sees in me to act like this or he is just really playing my head? I don't know what to think!

“Christmas, don't you want to be with me? I know there is a reason why you really here. I know you want me too the way I want you,” he said as I didn't utter any word.

“O-okay.”

His expression showing he is confused. “Okay, what?”

“You want me to stay with you, right? I will go with you,” I answered.

Duke stood up quickly, wearing a smile at his handsome face. “Thank you!” I was taken aback when our body touches as he hug me. “You don't know how much happiness you fill in my heart. Give me a chance and I will show you my sincerity, Christmas.”

In being speechless on what is happening at this moment, I replied only a nod and I know he got what my answer is. Same as him, my heart is full of happiness but the worries is still here. I don't know what will happen next in the other day to the fact that Carlos just showed up yesterday. I don't know if this man with me will really love me or we are just going to end up like with his ex-fiancee. I'm not saying that I'm going to do what Lysias did. I'm trying to say is he might replace me someday if I become not enough for him like what I had read on books. Too many thoughts and what ifs running in my mind that pushing me to walk away at his office and forget everything. But the child inside me need him and I don't want to be selfish just because of negative thoughts.

“Let's go now.” Duke intertwined our hand again and we are now walking together at his desk. He just took his phone together with the folder before we leave in his office. “Let's go first at the fourth floor. I have to give this folder to my secretary.”

“Hmmm.” I hummed as I nodded to him.

As we got on the floor he said, I was stunned seeing all of his employees here. All their eyes was on our way which I can say is on me. Their stares seems want to kill me now by being with their boss. I can tell at their eyes if they like me or not. Why would I expect that they will like me anyway?

“Good day, Sir Grey,” greeted of everyone to him.

“Cheena told us that your friend visited you today. So, it was her, Sir Grey?” asked of the fat woman who walked in front us. She look at me and smile but it was obviously fake!

“Yeah, and by the way, this is Christmas everyone,” Duke introduced me to them.

“Hi,” I said to them and smiled uneasy.

“Okay, everyone, go back to work we didn't come here to have conversation,” he ordered, “Patty, you give this to Cheena we are going now.” he gave the folder to the fat woman in front us.

“Okay, Sir Grey. If you don't mind where are you going?” she asked.

“It's none of your business,” he answered and intertwined again our hands in front them as we turn our back.

“b***h,” whispered of the fat woman and I don't know if Duke also hear it.

Our hands still close together till we goes out in his company. I want to free my hand from him but he is holding mine so tight like I'm going to run away. He just free my hand as we reach here in his convertible car. At this moment, are now heading at his house.

“You don't have to hold my hand in front of them,” I complained here in the passenger seat.

“I'm sorry. I didn't stop myself in holding your hands,” he apologized while his eyes center in our way.

“I'm sure they are now thinking something on what they just saw. They didn't like my presence there especially your secretary. Don't you notice it, Duke?” I didn't stop myself to spill out what is in my mind. If this conversation will make him turn off to me then it's better. This dream will probably going to stop.

He heaved a sigh and glimpsed a second to me. “Do you think I didn't notice it? Of course, I do. That are my employees so I noticed it. I noticed how Cheena look at you and what Patty just said as we turn our back. I noticed everything, Christmas. I ain't blind.” He said at his calm voice.

“Then why are you still holding my hand in front them? Do you want them to hate me?”

He suddenly stopped the car here in the side way of the road then faced me. “Let me ask you, Christmas. What do you feel when our hands are close together?”

I gulped. “W-what kind of quest–”

“Just answer the question.”

I gripped my lower lip and averted my eyes in front. “I-I'm happy.”

“Really?” he asked and I nodded, “Then don't mind what will they going to say or think. You can't control the people around you and you can't do nothing about it. The important is you are happy and that's it, Christmas.”

I heaved a sigh because he was right. “I'm sorry.”

“It's okay just don't mind them, okay?”

“Okay.” I smiled to him.

“Good. Let's go now.”