REFINED ROMANCE

The past

Liam , you have to be accurate with your medication. Depression isn't a thing that just fades away. And you've had a severe period of trauma that led to a collapsing result. Of course you're going to try to fight this yourself but the medication will help."

"I don't need to take pills, Doctor."

"I heard the divorce was finalized. That's good news. Have you been tempted to use since our last session?"

Use what?

Head lowered, I tried to breathe and listened.

"No, I'm clean. Now can you please leave?"

"I find that hard to believe. Just six months ago you were severely hurt, a drug addict and -"

"I'm not a drug addict anymore," he hissed. My eyes widened. "It was a phase. I was weak and I picked myself up again. I found a distraction. I found something to keep me going."

"So no attempts after that last time to commit suicide?"

"No," he sighed and I felt my eyes fill with tears. "I found something to live for. And after today, everything has finally changed for me. There is something to have hope in and I don't need the use of drugs to get me through what the hell happened."

"Try to keep distance between your btother and yourself," he said calmly, "especially your ex-wife. Keep things strictly professional. Don't linger on thoughts of what happened. Stay away from your mother."

"I'm trying to."

"I see that you're finally accepting what happened and you are trying to move on." I heard him sigh. "Is that the Sophie told me about in our last session? The one who keeps you having faith?"

"Yes," he croaked. I couldn't help it, I smiled, blinked fast and tears fell to the carpet. Head lowered, my legs remained parted. "I hardly know her, but I feel as if she came into my life for a reason."

"Then that sounds promising. Just be careful. Especially after your period of drama. Maybe you should have taken some time away from attachments. To breathe. Don't jump into a situation too fast without fully healing from the past one."

"Look, don't try to enact a session after nine in the night," he sassed. "I'll be in touch with you tomorrow. I'll renew my medication but stop hassling me. I am strong enough to handle this on my own."

"But yet you managed to try to end your life two times within one month, both times you almost succeeded."

"I will see you tomorrow Doc ,have a nice evening. I heard him say and the Doctor was dismissed just like that .

Suicide huh?" my throat ached.

Squeezing his eyes shut, tears trailed down pale cheeks. "Yes, twice."

"Why?" I found it hard to breathe, "you're such a strong person. Why would you do something like that? Tell me what happened."

"As I said before, even a powerful man has weaknesses." The glass remained between well manicured fingers.He gazed at me. "She was pregnant when I discovered she was cheating on me with him .

My eyes widened.

"Was the baby yours ,I asked ?

His eyes were lowered. "With my brother and ,"No the baby was not mine .You can imagine how that hurt me. I was in Paris, Fashion Week. I came back and walked in on the two of them..." his voice faltered. He bit his pink lips.

Taking his right hand, I squeezed cold fingers softly.

"I threw a tantrum, thrashed our apartment in L.A and threatened to kill her. Then before the media got a hold of it, I disappeared off the grid and went to Texas to spend time with my father. When I came back, Kate had completely removed my clothes from the mansion we owned together and she gave my brother first preference in taking what he wanted. She was pregnant with his child. Still is. Or...whatever..." he blinked away tears.

"So naturally mother called to inform me that I was a disgrace, a morron and when I screamed that I was actually..never cared abou her opinion she wiped me out of her will. I couldn't care less. I have my own money And the thought of having my brother sleep with my wife a share something like that with him weakened me. I tried to kill myself. First with a massive overdose. Then whilst in the hospital, I grabbed a razor and tried to find a vein. Both were unsuccessful."

"Oh my God," I inhaled deeply.

"The blood," holding out his hands, fingers were splayed. "It was a bone deep cut. Just here." I was shown the hairline cut that had healed

"But you survived. Which meant that there is something better for you in life to live for." Taking his hand, my fingers wrapped around the wrist that had been severed.

"Yes. Never mind Hopper. I wasn't a raccoon eyed druggy. I was hooked on barbiturates. Pills. Nothing else."

I still wasn't feeling any kind of relief. He understood and swallowed.

"Now, my job is basically on the line in the company because my brother is pushing with the Board to sack me. So is mother."

"No," I couldn't believe it.

"Yes, my days in Dazzle are numbered. Which is why I came back to New York because it's only a matter of time. All my shares are gone. I lost everything because mother is on brother's side . The son she always wanted" he sassed, his head dancing. "f*****g pathetic excuse for family that I have."