Rearview Mirror

Chapter 19

Chapter Twelve

Leaving the Hospital

After Zach left, Nicole sat on the bed next to Amber. Nicole was staring at the sheet lost in thought when she felt a kiss on her neck.

“Where are you?” Amber asked softly.

“I’m here. I just realized how much of your life I know nothing about and how much of your life you hid from us before you left,” Nicole said.

“We’ll talk, I promise. I love you, Nicole, you have to know that.” Amber took Nicole’s hand and made sure they were looking into each other’s eyes.

“I do, and you know I love you, too. Sometimes, that just doesn’t feel like enough, though.”

“Yeah, I know. At least we still have some time together. Just us.”

“I love that idea. You sure you don’t mind staying at my place? If you would feel more comfortable at the hotel, I don’t want to—” Nicole was silenced by Amber’s lips on hers.

“Positive, I don’t mind,” Amber whispered into Nicole’s lips before kissing her again.

“You two are the cutest couple,” Jamie said as she entered the room.

“I thought you were a night nurse,” Amber said, smiling at Jamie.

“I am, but I wasn’t going to miss a chance to say goodbye to my favorite patient and couple. I come with discharge papers and instructions.” Jamie held up several papers. “I can leave, but then you have to wait for a day nurse, and that could be a few hours.”

“Please let me leave,” Amber begged, giving Jamie puppy dog eyes.

“Yeah, please let her leave.” Nicole laughed at Amber and the face Jamie was making.

“Fine. We have to go over these instructions, and I need you, Nicole, to make sure she follows them.”

“I’ll do my best, but she’ll be going back to New York soon.”

“Well, not until she gets the all-clear to fly, and she won’t be given that until she finishes most of these instructions.”

“Hello, I’m right here.” Amber scoffed, looking between the two women.

“We know, but you don’t listen very well when it comes to your health and well-being,” Jamie said, causing Nicole to laugh and Amber to pout.

“Oh, stop.” Nicole kissed the side of Amber’s head.

“So, let’s get through this so you can get out of here and I can go home. Amber, you need to take these antibiotics three times a day for ten days. Try not to move your left shoulder too much and keep the sling and brace on as much as you can stand. That will help the breaks heal. The incision spot is going to need the dressing changed daily, and you need to keep it as clean as possible. Cuddles and kissing will help pain management, but should they not be enough, here are some pain meds. Take one every four to six hours. They’re going to make you sleepy. Any questions so far?”

“The cuddling and kissing. Is there a time limit on those, as well, or is it as I can tolerate it?” Amber giggled.

“We’ll go with as tolerated.” Jamie laughed. “Remember you were shot a few days ago, your body needs time to heal. If you’re going to go for more than cuddling and kissing, be careful.”

“We will.” Nicole blushed as Amber nodded.

“All right. Lastly, should you develop a fever within the next ten days, you need to go to the ER immediately to have the incision site checked for infection. If you get an infection where you were shot, it can be very—and let me emphasize again very—dangerous.”

“I get it, infection bad,” Amber said.

“Well, it could cost you your kidney,” Jamie said bluntly.

“Oh,” Amber and Nicole said in unison.

“Yeah, so infection very bad,” Jamie said.

“I’ll keep an eye on her, and when she goes back, Zach will watch over her,” Nicole said, feeling her heart ache at the idea of Amber leaving.

“Sign here that you agree to it, and, Nicole, you need to sign below since she’s medicated that you understand it, and then you, my dear, will be free to leave.” Jamie pushed the papers toward Nicole and Amber.

They signed the papers and were given copies of the instructions and the medication. They said their goodbyes, and Amber changed into the sweatpants and T-shirt Nicole had brought for her. Jamie came back with a wheelchair and wheeled Amber out of the building, and Nicole retrieved her car and met them at the front of the building. Nicole and Amber drove in silence back to the hotel to collect Amber’s things.

Zach arrived back at the hotel and grabbed Nicole’s signed form out of Amber’s bag and finished packing his stuff, as well as Amber’s. He went downstairs to Heather’s office.

“Hey, kid,” Zach said as he knocked and opened Heather’s door.

“Hey, Zach.” Heather looked up from the paperwork on her desk.

“I’m getting ready to leave as soon as Nicole and Amber spring her from the hospital.”

“I’m going to miss you.” Heather stood and walked around her desk and hugged the man she had come to know and care about in such a short time.

“I’m going to miss you, too. I never thought that I could care about a group of people as quickly as I have you all. I should have known since I loved Amber almost the minute I met her.”

“I never truly thanked you for taking care of her for all these years,” Heather said.

“No thanks needed…she helped me, and I helped her. I wish it wouldn’t have taken ten years, but I’m glad I got to know more about her and her past.”

“You have my number and my email. I expect you to not be a stranger and to keep in touch.”

“I will if you will,” Zach said, smiling.

“Deal,” Heather said as they heard a knock on the door. “Come in.” The door opened, and there stood Nicole and Amber.

“Hey, you got released.” Heather moved to carefully hug Amber and then Nicole.

“Hey, gorgeous.” Zach moved the chair over for Amber to sit.

“Hey,” Amber said softly as she sat.

“So, do I need to set up for a nurse to come in to take care of you?” Heather joked.

“Actually, she’s going to stay with me until she gets the approval to fly home. Once she gets back to New York, Zach, you’re going to have to watch over her,” Nicole said.

“Hello, I can watch over myself,” Amber said.

“Amber, you would do the same if any of us were in your spot,” Heather said.

“That’s different.” Amber rolled her eyes.

“Bullshit.” Nicole gave Amber a stern look. “The big thing is to make sure she doesn’t get an infection where the incision is. If she does, they said she could lose her kidney.”

“What the hell? Just from an infection?” Zach exclaimed.

“Yeah, because of how close to the kidney it was and what they had to do. Any sign of a fever in the next ten days, and she’s to go to the ER immediately.”

“I promise when she gets home, I will look after her,” Zach said.

“I’ll be fine, you guys.”

“Let us worry and take care of you. You took such amazing care of me and Travis when he was sick, and when he died, you took care of me. Let me return the favor.”

“You took care of me plenty of times, including that first year.”

“Then you can owe me.”

“Fine, I’m too tired to argue.” Amber smiled back at him.

“Baby, do you want me to go get your stuff and you can wait down here?” Nicole asked.

“Yes, please,” Amber said.

“I’ll go with you to check the room for both of our things, and then we can get you to Nicole’s to get some rest,” Zach said.

“Thanks,” Amber said tiredly.

Nicole and Zach went up to the room, leaving Heather and Amber alone in Heather’s office.

“How are you holding up, honestly?”

“I’m tired, I hurt, I’m scared,” Amber blurted.

Heather sat in the chair next to Amber and took her hand. “Hey, we all love you, and we’ll always be here for you.”

“I don’t deserve it, you guys, any of this.”

“The guilt you’re feeling, you need to let it go. What happened before, it made us all the strong people we are now. It’s up to us to move past and grow from it.”

“Insightful,” Amber said. “What my family did to Nicole…that I can’t move on from.”

“They did it, not you. Had you stayed, they would probably have still done it because your dad and brother would have found out you two were in love. The guilt is going to eat you up inside, and I love you too much to stand by and watch it happen.”

“I love you, too, but I don’t know how to let go of the guilt,” Amber admitted.

“You and Nicole need to discuss what happened and what you both want for the future. I can say honestly that anyone I have ever dated, I compared to you…I know you aren’t perfect. We all have flaws, but you make up for them with the kindness and compassion you have in your heart.”

“Weren’t you the one calling me mean not more than three days ago?”

“I was, and I stand by it, but it was in fun, and it was out of love. I wish there was a clone of you. If there was, I’d want to be with her. I know that you and Nicole are destined to be together. You may not believe it, you may not see it, but you two were made for each other.”

“I believe it and feel it, I just don’t see how it’ll work,” Amber said.

“Again, we’re back to you and Nicole needing to talk.”

“When did you get so smart?”

“I was a psychology and philosophy major.”

“Don’t those two contradict each other?”

“Shush you.” Heather laughed.

“Nicole and I will talk. I’m glad you know that I have flaws, I’m not sure you see all of them, though.”

“I see enough. You were the first crush I ever had. Part of me is always going to have a crush on you, I just know better than to act on it.”

“I’m glad.” Amber squeezed Heather’s hand.

Nicole and Zach came to the door and smiled seeing the two talking.

“We’re all set,” Nicole said.

“Great, you two go put that stuff in the car, and I’ll help Amber out,” Heather said.

“See you out front,” Zach said, and he and Nicole left.

“I know that you’re conflicted about the future, but please keep an open mind when you two talk.”

“I’ll do my best,” Amber said, and the two left the office.

“How do you really think she’s doing?” Nicole asked as soon as the elevator doors closed.

“I think she’s unsure of a lot of things right now. I know she loves you more than life, but she’s scared and so full of guilt.”

“I’m scared, too. I don’t know how to help her get over the guilt.”

“Give her time,” Zach said as they gathered Amber’s belongings.

“Promise me you’ll keep a close eye on her when she gets back to New York.” Nicole looked Zach in the eyes.

“You have my word,” Zach said as they headed back down to Heather’s office.

Nicole and Zach put their stuff in the car and waited as Amber and Heather slowly made their way out. Once outside the hotel, Nicole was by Amber’s side, helping her to the car and getting her situated.

“Nic, sweetie, I’m okay,” Amber said as she fussed over her.

“You are not,” Nicole said sternly. “You were shot a few days ago, and you have a broken collarbone and fractured shoulder.”

“I know, but, sweetie, they let me out of the hospital, so I must be doing better. Yes, I hurt, but once we get to your place and situated, I’ll take something for the pain.”

“Do you need something now?” Nicole asked as her panic rose.

“No, I need for you to give me a kiss and then get into the car and drive me to your house.” Amber smiled.

Nicole leaned forward cautiously and kissed Amber before going around to the other side of the car and getting in.

“Zach and I will be by later. We’ll give you two time to get situated,” Heather said, surprising Zach, but also seeing relief in his eyes.

“Thanks.” Amber offered a small smile to the two.

Nicole drove them to her house. It was a short five-minute drive. Once they arrived, she helped Amber inside.

“Do you want to stay in your mom’s room or my room?” Nicole asked.

“I’d love to stay with you, but if it’s a bother, then I’ll stay in my mom’s room.” Amber looked down at the floor.

“I would love to have you stay in my room.” Nicole tilted Amber’s head up.

She helped Amber make it up the stairs and down the hall. Once inside the room, Nicole pulled back the covers on the bed and turned to face Amber.

“Do you want to curl up in your sweats, or would you like to get out of them?”

“I’d love to get out of them. I think I’d overheat if I stayed in them.” Amber smiled. “I…um…will need help getting undressed, though.”

Nicole blushed and smiled. “Would I be out of line to say my pleasure?”

“No, you wouldn’t.” Amber gave her a coy smile.

Nicole tentatively knelt in front of Amber and reached up and slipped her fingertips under the waistband of the sweatpants. She gingerly eased them down. She could feel Amber’s breath catch as she watched her lowering the sweatpants. Nicole steeled herself and calmed her hormones enough to continue lowering the pants and finally was able to have Amber step out of them. Nicole’s gaze trailed up Amber’s body until she met deep blue smoldering eyes. Nicole rose and was pulled quickly toward Amber, and their lips crushed together in a passionate kiss. After several long moments, Nicole pulled back.

“You need to get in bed,” Nicole said softly, not trusting her voice.

“Will you join me?” Amber asked.

“I don’t know if that’s a good idea.”

“I promise to behave myself.” Amber smirked.

“You behaving isn’t my biggest concern. Me behaving, that’s my biggest concern.” Nicole smiled.

“I’m okay with you not.” Amber wrapped her good arm around Nicole’s waist and pulled her close.

“Behave or I’ll sleep on the couch downstairs,” Nicole teased.

“No, you won’t. You need to be next to me, keeping an eye on me. Remember?” Amber raised an eyebrow at her and then gave Nicole a smile.

“Get in bed, and I’ll go get you some water to take your meds and then tuck you in.”

“Will you please lay with me? Just for a while?”

“If you get in bed now, I will.” Nicole saw a relieved look cross Amber’s face.

Amber got in bed and tried to adjust, but with her bad arm and side pain, she couldn’t get comfortable. Nicole came back to see her struggling. She set the water on the nightstand and helped Amber get the pillow adjusted to support her shoulder and another pillow to support her side.

“Thanks,” Amber said.

“I’m here to help.”

Now that Amber was situated, Nicole handed her a pain pill and the glass of water. Amber took the pill and Nicole put the glass back on the nightstand before she settled herself in the bed next to Amber. Nicole put her arm around Amber’s shoulders and allowed Amber to lean her head on her shoulder.

“Are you comfortable?” Nicole asked.

“As comfortable as I can get, but you holding me feels incredible.”

“I’m glad because holding you in my arms is amazing.”

They lay together until Amber’s pill kicked in and she fell asleep. Once she was resting comfortably, Nicole eased herself out of bed and covered Amber up.

“I’ll love you forever,” Nicole whispered as she leaned forward and kissed Amber’s forehead.

Nicole slipped out of the room and went downstairs in time to hear a soft knock on the door. She checked the peephole, even though she knew it would be Heather and Zach. Seeing them, she unlocked the three locks and opened the door for them.

“Hey,” Heather said as they entered.

“Hey,” Nicole said.

“Is she sleeping?” Zach asked.

“Yeah, I gave her a pain pill, and she drifted to sleep.”

“Well, we were thinking that Zach would stay at my house tonight to give you and Amber some time alone,” Heather said.

“You don’t have to. I mean, Zach, you’re leaving tomorrow, so Amber and I will have plenty of time alone, and you’ll be without her for several days.”

“I just don’t want to intrude,” Zach said.

“You aren’t, and I think Amber would like to have you here,” Nicole said. “I’d like it, too. It’s nice for me to see you two together. I get to see her and what an amazing woman she has become.”

“Thank you,” Zach said.

“Jill said she would call when she’s done with work to see if Amber was up for visitors,” Heather said.

“You think you’re going to be able to get rid of the memories of us?” David Knight asked.

“D-daddy, you aren’t going to be able to hurt me anymore,” Amber said, her voice quivering.

“Wrong, little girl. We’ll always be in your mind and tormenting you, keeping you in fear. Nobody will want you.”

“Nicole l-loves me…Nicole w-wants me…”

“Not once she realizes how broken you are.” Jeffrey Knight laughed as she squirmed to get away from him.

“No, you don’t know that,” Amber said as tears rolled down her face.

“Oh, we do. We’ll never leave you or allow you happiness,” her father said.

“No, I won’t allow that.”

“Oh, you don’t get to choose. We’re messing with you now, and you can’t do a damn thing about it. If we aren’t tormenting you, we’ll torment that pretty little redhead of yours,” Jeffrey said.

“You leave her alone,” Amber snapped.

“No, I don’t think we can do that.”

“Nicole, Nicole,” Amber called, looking around and not finding her.

“Nicole,” Amber screamed as she sat up in bed drenched in sweat.

Nicole, Zach, and Heather heard the scream and ran upstairs and opened the door to Nicole’s room.

“Amber?” Nicole raced to the bed, seeing Amber dripping wet and holding her side.

“Nic,” Amber panted and cried.

Nicole wrapped her arms around Amber and felt her shaking.

“Amber, are you okay?” Zach asked as he and Heather sat at the end of the bed.

Amber shook her head, and tears continued to roll down her face.

“Baby, talk to me. What happened?” Nicole held Amber close.

“I had a bad dream. My dad and brother were telling me that they were always going to be there to keep me under their control.”

“Oh, baby,” Nicole said. “They can’t get to you anymore.”

“They said that if they weren’t tormenting me, they would go after you,” Amber cried. “They said nobody would want me because they would keep me broken.”

“Amber, that’s so far from the truth. I always have and always will want you. Oh, I love you so much,” Nicole cried, squeezing Amber tighter.

“Amber, all three of us love you so much and will always be here for you,” Zach said as his heart broke for the pain she was in and the hold her brother and father still had on her.

“Zach is right,” Heather said.

“I’m broken, though. They broke me, and I will never be right. You all deserve better.” Amber shook her head.

“Amber, no! You can’t believe that.” Nicole pulled back and looked Amber in the eyes. “I’m yours, I will always be yours. You are mine, and you will always be mine. Face it, we’re inevitable.”

“I…” Amber started just as a stab of pain shot through her side, taking her breath away.

“Amber?” Heather squeaked, moving to the other side of Amber as her eyes started to roll back in her head.

“She’s bleeding.” Zach noticed a red mark forming below the hand on Amber’s side.

“Crap, she must have jarred her incision.”

“Where are the dressings?” Zach asked, panic in his voice.

“They’re in the bathroom. On the counter.” Nicole pointed toward the en suite.

Nicole and Heather helped Amber lie down, and Zach went to retrieve the supplies to clean up and cover the incision again.

Carefully, Nicole pulled the hem of Amber’s shirt up and exposed the dressing on her side. She cautiously pulled back the dressing and took the gauze that Zach handed her and cleaned around the wound. She applied antibiotic cream and then recovered the wound with a fresh dressing. Heather grabbed a fresh shirt out of Nicole’s dresser for Amber. She and Zach stepped out to give them privacy while Nicole helped Amber change.

“I don’t deserve you,” Amber said.

“You do, and you deserve all of us. You are so loved, and we’re going to get you through this,” Nicole said as they carefully sat up and Nicole removed the sling on Amber’s left arm and eased her arm out of the hole and then did the same with the right arm before pulling the shirt over Amber’s head. Nicole grabbed the clean shirt and put it over Amber’s head, eased the left arm through the hole and then the right arm and pulled it down, covering Amber’s body.

“Thank you,” Amber whispered. She was ashamed that she couldn’t do this herself.

Nicole smiled and helped her into her sling again and then adjusted the pillows so that Amber could lie down comfortably.

“How is that?” Nicole asked once Amber was situated.

“I don’t want to sleep anymore,” Amber said, her eyes pleading.

“Do you want us to keep you company?” Nicole asked. Amber nodded. “Let me get Heather and Zach, and we’ll hang out in here with you. If you drift off to sleep, we’ll be here to protect you.”

Nicole quickly stepped out of the room to tell Heather and Zach the plan. They went and got snacks and drinks and then camped out in Nicole’s room. Heather put in a movie, and Nicole and Amber cuddled together. As the movie came to an end, Zach looked back and saw that Nicole and Amber had drifted off to sleep.

“Let’s get out of here and let them rest,” Zach said as he and Heather cleaned up their snacks and went back downstairs.