You All Along

Prologue

They say the loud beeping sound of an alarm clock was one horrible way to start someone's day. When you stub your toe at the side of the bed and go to the bathroom only to slip and land on your butt on the damp tile floor there was some sort of dark premonition, one can only guess that things are gonna get worse — or perhaps not. Yup, not when you are a self-proclaimed 20-year-old young adult who thinks they have everything under control. Most certainly not when you are Rhine Clemmings. 

    "Pshh. Everything's gonna be alright. It's not like something's gonna happen", you assure yourself as you starred at your drowsed reflection in the mirror. You opened the faucet and splashed cold water on your face. Yeah, you got this. 

    To be in your shoes was like continuously walking on thin ice. It's as if you're holding your breath with every move you make because everyone else is conscious of you. Their eyes are glued to you like permanent stickers that you can't get rid of and you struggle to meet up with their expectations, since it's the price you have to pay for being someone who is out  there. When you're openly gay in a society where people think of you as someone who is limited and flawed, you're forced to scrap your way to excel in life as an unspoken rule to be held accountable for being the way you are. You know it's not fair, but nothing in the world really is, so you learn to live with that burden. Even at times when hatred is thrown at you, you never wavered about how you went along with things but something — no, someone just might change that. 

    "Oops, there goes my iced coffee" from a muffled laugh that came after the guy who literally just bumped at you in the hallway— your white shirt now doused in a cold drink. 

    You gave him a death glare. "In case you forgot Gregory, there are actually people who have places to be and not just wasting their time being an asshole, so can you watch where you're going?" your irritation rose as you watched him amused at what he's done to you. Of course, there's nothing he can't do to completely ruin your day. He was your arch enemy after all, the one and only Colin Gregory .  

    "Ow" he strokes his chest with his palm "What a way to hurt my feelings Clemmings. I swear I didn't mean it and you just happened to be there." 

    "And like I said, you also just happened to be an asshole". You shoved him out of your way but he caught your arm so you tried to remove it, yet his grip was unrelenting. 

    "Let go of me." 

    "Not with that stained shirt", he raised an eyebrow. 

    "It's fine. It's not like you're Mother Mary anyways", you managed to say, and once again tried to remove his hand, but he was persistent. 

    "I have a spare shirt if you want. We wouldn't want to embarrass you in class, now would we?" It was a choice you had to make and from the tone of his, the latter seems not an option. However, you'd rather humiliate yourself in front of others than to wear his shirt — not over your dead body.  

    "I said it's fine so don't try to act like you care. Besides, I don't even want to wear your shirt, so let go of me now." You steel your resolute and he lets go. You walk away from him without sparing him any glance. 

    There's nothing good that comes out of associating with the likes of Colin Gregory and he certainly was someone you didn't ever want to tolerate, so you find every opportunity there is just to avoid him. However, as if condemned by fate, both of your paths were somehow intertwined like a curse and, if that wasn't worse enough, it's as if he enjoys getting your attention way too much to the point where you just want him to vanish from the face of the earth. You held your pen slightly above your ear, paused for a while, then continued scribbling notes in your notebook. You end up being immersed in class while you bury away any thoughts that were distracting you that morning. A little later, you meet up with your friend, Claire, who's been impatiently texting you nonstop. 

    "Whoa, what happened to your shirt?" she asks as soon as she saw you. 

    "Oh this? spilled by some asshole who's got nothing better to do" you said and she was somehow convinced enough not to bother asking you for more. 

    "So" you start, "What is it that you want to tell me?" she sits right next you and you can see her let out a long sigh.

    "What now? Am I just gonna guess what's gonna come out of your mouth?" 

    "I—" she stops. 

    "Yes?"

    She sighs again, "Okay, just hear me out first, so please don't try to hate me." 

    "Claire, if this is gonna be about your good-for-nothing ex who cheated on you with another girl, then I'm telling you that my advice is still gonna be the same because you deserve so much better and-" she puts her hand over your mouth to stop you from blabbering. 

    "No, it's not that" she states and you raise an eyebrow. 

    "Den, whet esh it?" came a muffled sound from you. 

    "It's about Colin" 

    You remove her hands from your mouth. "Wait, WHAT?" 

    "Just please hear me out first, okay, I swear it's nothing like what you imagined in your head right now." 

    'Well, this'd better be nothing like what I'd imagined',  you thought to yourself, and took a needed deep breath to prepare yourself from whatever the hell she was about to say to you. You gave her a nod.  

    "Well... as I was saying, I remember that I told you a few months ago about how I find Colin attractive because he really was and everybody loves him, but you told me not to because obviously you hated him and you didn't want me to become some sort of rat he's caught up in his cheese trap so I was like 'Okay, whatever you say' and then-" this time it was you who shut her up. 

    "Okay I get it, so where are you going with this?" every second she spent beating around the bush only made you itch from wanting to hear the truth. 

    "The point is, Colin tried to make a move on me and at first I thought he was just fooling around like he always does, but it's been a month now and he's still trying to-" 

    "WHAT?" You abruptly rose from your seat. " A MONTH? When were you gonna tell me?" 

    "I... I didn't want to make you worry, so I thought that if I just waited until Colin grew tired of chasing after me then I wouldn't have to tell you, because if I did then I knew it would make you upset." 

    "And you think this ISN'T?" 

    She stands up and grabs you by the hand. "Look, I was gonna tell you, okay. I just- I didn't think things would turn out this way". She lowered her head. 

Wow. So much for nothing like I'd ever imagined in my head. 

    There was nothing you could do anyway, and you knew that you were only gonna get yourself a criminal record if you murdered that asshole right in this instance, so you chose to be civil instead. "So, have you already said yes to him?"  

    She looks at you once again and was about to open her mouth to answer you, but it was like the gates of hell started to open when he made his presence clear.

"She might as well have by now, isn't that right babe," he strutted towards the both of you and you could see that infamous smug look plastered on his face.

"Babe?"

"Rhy, I swear it's nothing like that." She pleaded with her eyes.

"Not yet"

"Stop it, Colin."

"Why? Afraid your best friend's not gonna give his blessings?" He looks dead straight into your eyes, consistent with his smug look. You grit your teeth.

"Don't worry, I'm gonna make him. No. I'm gonna make him like me..." he smirked, "more than enough to be with you." You knew he was talking to Claire, but his eyes told otherwise. He took Claire's hand from yours and interlocked it with his.

    "Surprise!" he held up their intertwined hands. He catches your gaze and you knew exactly at that moment that there was something in those tantalizing hazel eyes of his that this was only the beginning of everything. Your gut feeling was telling you he's been planning this so damn well to tick off that one last box in your list of reasons why you should kill him. And if this is how he's gonna do things, then you might as well give him a good fight. You clenched your fists tightly.

Bring it on, Gregory.