Big Boss man

Back to the old way

Shane watched me walk into the office from the kitchen where he stands drinking his coffee.

I smile and hang my coat on the stand by the entrance.

“Good morning Rebel” comes Kathrines calm and silky voice.

“Good morning Kathrine” I reply with a wide smile.

“So how was Paris” she asks taking a seat on the small couch in front of my desk.

I walk to my desk and take a seat as Shane walks past me and into his office.

“Whats wrong with Mr Langley” I ask

“He’s been acting funny ever since he came in” she replies leaning back in her seat.

I take a deep breath and worry that he might know about me having dinner with Henry.

“So... tell me” Kathrine said leaning forward.

“Well what do you want to know” I reply titling my head to the side.

After lunch I spend some time with Marlene and she tells me all about her fathers surgery.

“I’m just glad he’s ok” I smile

“So how was the rest of the night with... you know who” she smiles looking in the direction of Shanes office.

I look at her horrified, like she knows what we done.

“It was pretty quiet” I smile

“And how was the lovely Henry” she asks

I smile and look towards Shanes office where he now stands with his hands in his pockets waiting for my reply.

“He..um..he was a gentleman” i reply turning my back towards Shane.

The rest of the day flows without any troubles and when Shanes leaves the office he does not smile at me nor does he say goodbye.

Now I definitely know he’s pissed with me.

I need a drink and I need it now.

Walking in the front door I head for the freezer and pour myself a neat drink of vodka.

How does he have the ability to make me feel like an errand child.

I mean, how dare he make me feel this way....Again.

I fill my bath and sink deep into my own thoughts.

When bedtime comes around I fall into bed feeling a little more than drunk.

The rest of the week is quiet with multiple deliveries and even talks of a new underwear line that we will be putting together for one of London’s top clothes stores.

Shane has not spoken to me all week and has been nothing but moody towards me and the other staff.

I want to talk with him but I don’t feel I have any right to walk into his office to question his actions.

So instead I do my work and live my life, my memories of Shane slowly fading into the back of my mind.

Dillion calls me after work midweek and announces he is going on a last minute holiday with his best friend Kyle.

“Mum, would you drive us to the airport”

“Of course I will” I reply putting a fresh bottle of vodka into the freezer.

“When do you want me to pick you up” I ask

“Friday just after Six in the evening” he replies

“Ok I will pick you up after work” I breath letting out a sigh.

“Your the best” he adds before hanging up the phone.

I climb into bed and fall into a troubled sleep.

My alarm rings Friday morning and I drag myself out of bed and in to the shower.

I just need to make it through today and then the weekend is mine.

Penny comes from the kitchen as I walk into work.

“Good morning Penny” I call as I hang my jacket.

“Good morning Rebel” she smiles walking off into the other room.

I walk to my computer and fire it up only to see an email from Henry asking to see me again.

Great, the one person I don’t want to see asks to see me, isn’t life funny like that.

After lunch Shane asks to see me in his office.

Great, now the one person who I want to see, probably wants to piss me off.

I walk to his office and knock on his door.

“Come” he shouts making me close my eyes.

I open the door and walk in closing the door quietly behind me.

Shane is standing by the window with his arms folded on his chest.

I give a small cough and step closer to where he stands.

“You called for me” I say holding my hands behind my back.

He stands quietly not speaking for a few seconds.

“How was your dinner with the charming Henry” he asks but not looking at me.

Unbelievable I mutter under my breath.

“Look, I don’t know what the deal is between you two, but please leave me out of it” I reply letting my voice crack ever so slightly.

He walks over to me briskly and stands inches from my face.

“Do you have any idea how I felt when I heard you had dinner with Henry f*****g Jenkins” he snaps.

“You have got to be f*****g kidding me” I breath.

Shane looks at me like a wild dog about to attack.

“You left me Shane... you left me alone in Paris”, “so no I don’t know what you felt when I had dinner with Henry because you weren’t there” I add through gritted teeth.

I walk to the door feeling the need to get away from his intense stare.

“Oh and by the way...” I pause.

“I am so not yours” I add letting the anger over flow as well as the tears.

I leave his office and dash for the bathroom where I can be alone.

Typical, he didn’t want me, but he didn’t want anyone else to have me either.

Three on the dot I get up and leave only letting Marlene know that I am leaving.

Dillion is waiting for me when I arrive to collect him.

“Please be carful” I say while driving down the quiet back roads towards the airport.

“Don’t you worry about me mum” he smiles turning up the stereo listening to the killers.

I drop him and Kyle off and wave them goodbye.

I know I don’t see him much but he’s still my baby boy.

A few miles from home all the warning lights turn on in the dash board and my car begins to splutter.

“No, no, no” I yell hitting the steering wheel with both hands.

After a few minutes more she is done.

I pull over and rest my head on the steering wheel in defeat.

I try to call Marlene but he phone goes straight to voice mail.

“Great” I sigh

There’s only one other person I can call and I don’t know if he will even answer.

Shane picks up on the second ring.

“Rebel” he answers

I explain to him whats happened and where I am.

“Just stay put” he commands before hanging up.

Half an hour later I see lights pull up behind me and I cautiously climb out of my car.

“You ok” he asks with him hands in his pockets.

I nod and give him a half smile.

He walks me to his car and opens the door for me.

I climb in and put on my seatbelt.

We drive in silence for a few miles before he finally speaks.

“So where were you driving from” he asks

“Really” I ask annoyed

“Rebel, I was asking a simple question” he replies looking straight ahead.

“No, you were trying to work out if I had been with Henry” I reply smugly

He laughs and nods his head.

“So were you” he asks looking at me briefly.

We arrive outside my house and I can’t wait to get out of his car.

“You know what..Shane... screw you” I reply opening the car door and getting out.

I walk to my front door and pull out my keys.

I enter my house and before I can shut the door Shane is walking in behind me.

“What the hell” I yell slapping my hands on my hips.

Shane walks past me and into my kitchen grabbing my vodka from my freezer.

“Lets have a drink shall we” he says walking back into the living room with two glasses.

“Maybe I don’t want to have a drink” I reply walking over to where he stands.

I yank the bottle from his hands and put it on the coffee table.

“Fine,,,, lets not drink” he smiles.

“Look thanks for saving me tonight but....” I don’t get to finish my sentence when Shane pulls me into his arms and kisses me with full force.

I try to pull away but Shane holds me firm pushing me hard against the living room wall.

I want to push him away but I feel I can’t.

“Shane stop” I breath against his lips.

“I can”t stop” he replies slamming his lips against mine once more.

He rips my top completely from my body making me cry against his kiss.

He unclips my bra in a heated frenzy taking my breasts in his mouth.

We are a hot breathing mess.

He yanks open my jeans and pulls them down slightly, just enough to fit his hand down the front and into my panties.

I grab his top and pull him close to me because its to only thing that makes any sense.

His fingers press against my hard bud, stroking me over and over sending me to the edge of my return.

“Shane” I cry as he kisses me once more.

He kisses my neck and kisses me all the way down to my stomach forcing him to his knees before me.

He removes my jeans and thong in one swift movement.

He looks up at me with heat in his eyes and lust on his tongue.

He continues his mission placing his mouth on me with a new kind of frenzy.

I grab his hair and pull it roughly making him groan against me.

“Shane...I...Can’t...I...” I don’t finish my sentence before my orgasm sends me out or control crying out some incoherent words.

He jumps to his feet before my shaking has stopped and undoes his pants lifting me up so I wrap my legs around him.

He walks me to the couch and lays me down so he is now on top of me.

“Tell me you want me Rebel” he breaths into my neck sending my mind into overdrive.

“What do you mean” I breath grabbing his face between my hands.

He looks at me with something stronger than lust in his eyes.

“Please tell me you want me” he asks again slamming his c**k deep inside me.

I cry out as he fills me over and over again.

“Tell me Rebel” he adds thrusting wildly

He looks at me once again.

“Tell me” he yells grabbing my head and pulling me down onto him.

“Shane...I...I want you” I yell over and over again.

“I want you, I will always want you” I add as he finally lets go filling me with his salty flavour.

When his breathing has calmed and he is lying still in my arms do I let the tears fall.

“Hey” he breaths kissing me gently.

I wipe away my tear looking away from him.

“Rebel look at me” he asks lifting his weight off me.

I slowly look at him letting my tears fall harder.

“Talk to me” he adds pulling me up into a sitting position.

“I’m sorry” I reply suddenly feeling very silly.

“Don’t be sorry, please its me who is sorry” he adds stroking my cheek.

“Shane what do you want from me” I ask sniffing

“What do you mean” he replies.

I grab the blanket from the back of the couch and cover myself up.

“I mean, why are you here.. now with me” I ask.

“Yet when we are at work you completely ignore me” I add feeling hopeless.

He looks away as if to consider his answer.

“Things are complicated” he sighs.

“Complicated How” I ask

He sighs again but does not look at me.

“Rebel I cant explain” he breaths standing and pulling on his jeans.

“Then I guess you should go” I reply pulling my knees up to my chest.

“Rebel please” he begs

“No Shane... just go” I yell again.

I stand and walk to the door trying to make my point.

He puts on his shirt and walks towards me.

We stand staring at each other, neither of us speaking.

“Rebel” he starts, but I don’t let him finish.

“Go” I cry hiding my face.

He touches my face and I close my eyes.

“Shane please” I plead opening the door.

“Just go” I cry trying desperately to hold it together.

“If you can’t tell me what I want to hear, then please leave” I say looking towards the door and out on to the street.

“I’m sorry” he sighs before turning and walking out of the door.

I close it behind him and sink to the floor feeling nothing but despair.

After a few minutes on the floor I get up and walk upstairs to the bathroom.

I turn on the shower and walk inside sinking back down onto the floor sobbing heavy tears.

Life should not be this difficult especially at my age.

I climb into bed and sink into a deep deep sleep preying for a better day tomorrow.