Bride Of The Beast

About The mate bond

I pushed away from the table and walked towards the back of the library. The air got colder the further I went, smelling of dust and damp stone.

This was the section Devon told me to avoid. He’d said the guards got jumpy around the old records, but the guards weren't in here right now so technically, I was free to do what I wanted.

I ran my hand along the spines of the books. Most were thick ledgers with years stamped on them in fading gold ink. My fingers stopped on a book that was smaller than the others, wedged between two massive volumes. It had no title, just a piece of grey parchment stuck to the spine with a single word written in cramped script: Bonds.

I pulled it out and sat on the floor between the stacks. The stone was cold, but I was hidden in the shadows. I opened the cover.

The first few pages were filled with diagrams of the neck, showing exactly where the teeth were supposed to sink in. There were sketches of the "Mark"—the jagged scar that was supposed to be a badge of honor for a mate. I ran my fingers over the bite on my own neck. It felt like a brand.

“The True Bond is the fusion of two spirits into a single pack-unit,” the text began. “Upon the Great Claiming—the bite—the souls of the pair are knotted. From that moment, the pair shares a sensory bridge. A wolf will know the heartbeat of their mate as clearly as their own. They will feel the direction of their mate’s soul, a physical tug in the center of the chest that acts as a compass. To be separated is to feel a limb has been torn away. The distance does not matter; the tether is unbreakable.”

I was pretty sure I couldn't find Eilis like that even if my life depended on it, but it wouldn't hurt to try.

I closed my eyes. I searched for that tug. I looked for any kind of direction, any sense of where Eilís might be. There was nothing. Just empty space and the sound of my own breathing.

Well that was stupid. I turned the page. The paper was brittle, yellowed at the edges. “The Scent-Merge: The most sacred of the wolf’s instincts. For a bonded pair, the mate’s scent becomes the only anchor in a world of chaos. For the wolf, the mate’s smell is a sedative that can pull them back from the brink of the Feral State. For the mate, the wolf’s musk—cedar, pine, or wet earth—is the only scent that can trigger the 'Safety Response,' an involuntary slowing of the pulse and a release of all defensive tension. The body recognizes the mate's scent as the only true sanctuary.”

This was also a load of nonsense, Eilis didn't release a scent that made me feel safe and I was very sure I didn't release a sedative smell.

I flipped further, looking for more. There was a chapter on The Vitality-Link. “The exchange of fluids during the bite creates a shared life-force. A bonded mate will begin to experience the wolf’s heightened awareness. They will find their vision sharper in the dark, their hearing attuned to the whispers of the woods. The mate’s body begins to burn with the same internal fire as the wolf, making them immune to the bite of the Northern frost. Even in the deepest winter, the pair provides enough warmth to sustain one another without need for fire.”

I swallowed hard. I wasn't seeing better in the dark. I wasn't even experiencing half of what was written in the book. A trace of suspicion began to form in my mind.

I kept reading, my eyes scanning the cramped, ink-stained script. “The Dream-Walk: The final stage of the union. In the deep stages of sleep, the barrier between minds dissolves. The pair will share a mental landscape, seeing each other's memories and feeling each other's current burdens as if they were their own. There are no secrets in the Dream-Walk; the mind is laid bare before the mate. To dream alone is a sign of a failing tether or a soul that has not fully surrendered to the bond.”

I tried to remember if I'd ever dreamed about Eilis cause I was sure I didn't see Eilís’s past. I didn't feel his worries. I was alone in my head, just like I had always been. If his soul was supposed to be in mine, then the door was locked tight.

The next page was titled The Emotional Mirror. “The bonded pair no longer possesses a singular emotional identity. A wolf’s rage manifests as a physical heat in the mate; a mate’s sorrow will cause the wolf’s own heart to ache. If one is in peril, the other will feel a sudden, sharp spike of adrenaline, regardless of the distance between them. They are two bodies, but one pulse. The suffering of one is the suffering of both.”

Was I reading this right? I looked at a section on The Alpha Voice. “The mate is physically unable to resist the direct vocal command of their Alpha. The frequency of the wolf’s voice, once bonded, bypasses the mate’s conscious mind and speaks directly to the blood. A command to 'Stay' or 'Listen' will cause an immediate, involuntary locking of the mate's limbs. It is the natural hierarchy of the Pack made manifest. To defy the voice is to defy the very blood that flows through the bond.”

Eilis had never commanded me or made me do something except I did it out of fear, or thought it was what I was supposed to do. Maybe he just hadn't used the command voice?

But If all of this was true, then the bond hadn't taken. I had the mark on my neck, and the whole court thought I belonged to him, but the bond wasn't there. We were a fraud. Or was I not experiencing this because I was human?

Eilís had to be the reason. He was the one keeping the secret. He knew the bite hadn't created the tether, yet he was out there, day after day, acting like I was his mate.

Why would he do that? If he didn't feel any pull or connection, why was he risking everything for me? Maybe he didn't know what a real bond felt like either.

They had said he was broken. His mother had died in a fire, his mind was split, and he was fighting a beast. Maybe he thought this cold, fearful silence between us was what a bond was supposed to be.

Or was I just making up an excuse for my own peace of mind?

I turned to the very last page. There was a final paragraph at the bottom, the ink slightly blurred.

“A failed bond is a sign of rejection by the Moon Goddess. It is an omen of rot within the line. A union that does not take is a hollow shell, offering no protection and no future. Such unions must be severed to protect the integrity of the Pack. To harbor a failed mate is to invite the ruin of the entire lineage.”

I knew what "severed" meant. It meant death. I shut the book. I shoved it back into the gap on the shelf, pushing it deep until it was hidden behind the larger volumes.

My hands were shaking. I stood up and rubbed my damp palms on my gown, trying to steady myself.

I wondered what would happen to me when Eilís finally got tired of pretending he felt something that wasn't there. If the bond was a lie, then this whole deal was a lie. And eve

ntually, Eilis will get tired of playing mate with me.