First Hero

CHAPTER THREE

CHAPTER THREE

Lady Thunder’s words hit me like a ton of bricks. I just stared at her in disbelief, my jaw hanging open. Even Rubberman, who was usually better at handling these kinds of revelations than I was, could only stare at Lady Thunder as if he wasn’t quite sure that his ears were working correctly.

“Did you just say that Beams and I aren’t the official superheroes of Golden City anymore?” said Rubberman. He smiled weakly. “That’s a joke, right? And not a really good one, either. You know you’re not that funny, right, Alice?”

Lady Thunder, however, just smiled at us like she was enjoying some private joke at our expense. “You’re right about one thing, Dennis, and it is that I am no comedian. I am simply stating the truth.”

“The truth?” Rubberman repeated. “What truth? You just said we aren’t the superheroes of Golden City anymore. That’s not something you can decide, you know. That’s between us and the Golden City government.”

Lady Thunder stroked her sharp chin thoughtfully. “You really are out of the loop, aren’t you? I guess I shouldn’t be surprised. You were never very good at keeping up with everything going on in the world around you. That weakness of yours is probably why you are still stuck out here in this small, backwoods city.”

“I’d appreciate less snark, Alice, and more facts,” said Rubberman, putting his hands on his hips. “Explain what you mean. Now.”

“Fine,” said Lady Thunder. She pulled a card out of a pocket in her toga and held it out toward us. “See this? Look at what it says.”

Frowning, Rubberman and I leaned over to get a better look at Lady Thunder’s card. It looked almost like a business card of some sort. It was a navy blue business card with the words ‘AGENT OF L.I.O.N.S.’ written across the top in block letters, while a logo of a lion’s roaring head stood off to the side. Lady Thunder’s name, phone number, and business address were written under the ‘AGENT OF L.I.O.N.S.’ bit, but more interestingly, the words ‘DEPARTMENT OF SUPERHEROES’ could also be seen just above the Agent of Lions line.

“L.I.O.N.S.?” said Rubberman, exchanging quick confused glances with me. “What is L.I.O.N.S.?”

“And what does the Department of Superheroes have to do with any of this?” I said, scratching the back of my neck.

“L.I.O.N.S. is an acronym,” Lady Thunder explained as she stowed her card away back into her toga. “It stands for Legalized Interstate Official National Superheroes, but we just call ourselves the Lions for short. We are a government superhero team working directly under the Department of Superheroes, which I’m sure you’ve heard of.”

We definitely had heard of the Department of Superheroes, a government department whose sole purpose was to enforce laws regulating the superhero industry, as well as clarify existing laws, grant or revoke superhero and sidekick licenses, and so on. In fact, Rubberman and I had had more than a few encounters with the Department’s agents over the past year and a half, although it had been a while since we last ran into any of their agents.

“I’ve never heard of Lions,” said Rubberman. “Or superheroes working for the government, for that matter.”

I agreed. As a general rule, superheroes were private businesses. Though we typically worked for individual cities and states, we did so as private contractors offering a service to these governments. We could and did hire ourselves out to private individuals and groups at times, not to mention pursuing lucrative merchandising and licensing deals, among other things. None of us worked directly for the government as actual employees. It simply wasn’t heard of.

“That’s because we’re relatively new,” said Lady Thunder. She brushed back her long, golden hair. “The Lions were founded last year after the Hero War that happened right here in Golden City. The government wasn’t very happy with how Heroes United and you handled the Hero War, to put it mildly. So President Renner gave the Department of Superheroes an executive order to form a government-sponsored superhero team whose job was to handle those kinds of incidents that the private sector clearly failed to handle adequately.”

“Excuse me?” I said. “We beat the Vigilante Legion and saved Golden City. Why would the government be upset about that?”

“Because the Vigilante Legion caused a lot of damage in the process,” said Lady Thunder. “As well, a lot of people saw it as proof that private superheroes simply didn’t have what it took to police their own industry. The Vigilante Legion was, after all, comprised mostly of ex-superheroes and sidekicks who had grown disillusioned with the superhero industry. The federal government would simply like a teensy weensy bit more control in situations like that. Which is why the Lions exist.”

I scowled at Lady Thunder—her attitude was starting to piss me off—but it was Rubberman who raised a hand and said, “So how does this fit into what you told us about me and Beams no longer working for Golden City anymore?”

“My earlier words weren’t very precise,” Lady Thunder admitted. “You and your sidekick still work for Golden City. Your contract is still in effect. It’s just that the Lions are going to take over the more important business of keeping the city safe from threats bigger than mere purse-snatchers.”

“Like what?” said Rubberman. “Clown bank robbers?”

Lady Thunder smirked. “No. More like the Zero Knights. Ever heard of them?”

“The Zero Knights?” I said. “Are you saying you came here to deal with them?”

“Bingo, kid,” said Lady Thunder with a nod. “As of today, the Lions are in charge of keeping Golden City safe from further Zero Knight attacks. You two can still deal with petty thieves and the like, but our focus will be strictly on stopping the Zero Knights before they harm anyone else.”

Rubberman folded his arms in front of his chest. “And just why do we need your help? We’ve been able to handle the Zero Knights just fine on our own so far, thank you very much.”

Lady Thunder laughed. She leaned against her spear like a walking stick. “Getting an entire city trapped in a magical bubble with only twenty-four hours before they die is not my idea of ‘handling’ a group like the Zero Knights. Or the federal government’s, for that matter. The Storm was very much a failure of your responsibility, Dennis.”

I bit my lower lip. Lady Thunder was referring to an event that happened here last month. The Zero Knight known as Mirar had trapped the entire city underneath a magical dome that no one could break through or escape from. Mirar then gave us twenty-four hours before another, separate spell activated and killed every man, woman, and child in the city. It had been Golden City’s darkest hour and we had nearly failed, but with the help of some unexpected allies, we managed to defeat Mirar and save the city from his rule. But not before the city nearly tore itself apart from riots caused by the citizens who had lost all hope and thought we were all going to die.

“I know the situation wasn’t ideal, but in case you haven’t noticed, we dealt with it,” said Rubberman. “We beat Mirar and saved the city.”

Lady Thunder tapped her chin thoughtfully. “Yes, but only after a good number of people died. Not to mention the immense spike in crime that happened after the barrier fell. Golden City isn’t quite so golden anymore, now is it?”

What Lady Thunder said was true. In the wake of the Storm, crime had spiked in Golden City even beyond the original crime spike that had happened after the Zero Knight known as Slasher had devastated the GCPD. It required Rubberman and me to work harder than ever to keep the streets safe, but it was no secret that we were fighting a losing battle. Rubberman had no response to that other than to look away, though whether he was ashamed at our own failure or angry at Lady Thunder for pointing it out, I wasn’t sure.

“To put it simply, the government doesn’t believe you can protect Golden City from the Zero Knights on your own anymore,” Lady Thunder continued. “It’s only a matter of time before Xero sends another Zero Knight to avenge Mirar. If Xero is willing to raze an entire city to the ground simply for the death of one Zero Knight, then what will he be willing to do to avenge the deaths of two Zero Knights?”

“True, but how do we know you guys are any better at handling the Zero Knights than us?” said Rubberman, jerking a thumb at his chest. “We have experience fighting the Zero Knights. You guys don’t.”

Lady Thunder chuckled. “Aside from the over one hundred years of combined superhero experience the Lions have altogether, we also have a powerful secret weapon on our side that even the Zero Knights don’t know about. I’m not going to tell you what it is just yet, however. I hope to test it out against an actual Zero Knight sometime soon, assuming any show up to try to avenge their fallen brothers, which seems likely at this point.”

“And Mayor Thomas knew about this but didn’t bother to tell us beforehand?” asked Rubberman in a slightly depressed tone.

Lady Thunder nodded. “Correct, Dennis. As I said, Mayor Thomas clearly has lost some respect for you. He now realizes that it will take more than a superhero and his sidekick to defend his city from a threat on the level of the Zero Knights. But I wouldn’t take it personally if I were you. It’s just politics.”

Then Lady Thunder stepped back onto her cloud and waved at us. “See you later, Dennis, Beams. You two can return to your base now if you want. I need to return to my own base and rendezvous with the rest of the team. Should we ever require your, ah, ‘help,’ we will call you. Bye.”

With that, Lady Thunder’s cloud rose back into the sky and Lady Thunder herself disappeared into the dark clouds above, which then moved toward downtown Golden City, leaving me, Rubberman, and the police officers standing around staring at it with a mixture of awe, anger, and embarrassment.

Rubberman then sighed and looked at me. “Come on, Beams. With Makeup dead, there’s not much else we can do here. It’s time for us to go back to the Elastic Cave. I need to make a few calls.”

I could tell Rubberman was hoping that Lady Thunder had been lying about the Lions coming in to take our jobs, but deep down, we both knew the truth:

We had just been replaced.