The Nememiah Chronicles Collection

Chapter 21

I paced across the living room, feeling distinctly claustrophobic. Other than the clock, there were no visual indicators of time inside the house and I watched impatiently as the hands crept past three, four, and then five. I felt sick, worrying endlessly about what was happening outside. What if someone got killed? What if Lucas got killed? There was an ache in my heart and I wrapped my arms around myself, trying to ease the pain.

I couldn"t stand this, couldn"t bear losing anyone for a second time. It was like Mom and my siblings all over again. I didn"t think I could survive another loss like that.

Part of me desperately wanted to wrench open the door, and run after them. Not knowing was going to kill me. I couldn"t stand being stuck in here without any idea of what was going on out there. One glimpse at Katie, sleeping like an angel on the couch, was enough to confirm following them wasn"t an option. I"d promised William I would look after her and she was my responsibility now. Pacing the floor, I listened for sounds from outside. What if Ripley and the others had been too late? What if they"d killed Lucas and the others?

Most of all, I couldn"t bear the thought of losing Lucas. I loved him with every fiber of my being, couldn"t bear to think of a future without him. Although I thought he would be better off without me, I couldn"t imagine being without him.

It was a little after six when Katie woke. She sat up on the couch, rubbing her fists over her eyes and I gave up pacing to sit beside her. “Where is William and Gwynn?”

“They"ll be back soon; they went to help Uncle Ben, Uncle Striker, and Uncle Lucas with a job. They won"t be long.” The use of the word "promise" was beyond me – I wouldn"t promise Katie anything, not when the situation was so tenuous.

Katie was still drowsy and content to nestle against my side. Covering her with the blanket, I wrapped my arm around her. “It"s early, Katie. Why don"t you go back to sleep?”

The little girl snuggled under the covers and I held her close, unwilling to leave her alone. I listened for the spirits, but there"d been nothing since our discussion earlier. I wondered vaguely about Mom"s words – what had she meant, about not being able to help others? And rules – what was that about? I pushed the thoughts to one side, too worried about Lucas and the others to think about anything else.

Laying my head against the back of the couch, I closed my eyes, a headache pulsing behind my temples. It was impossible to keep my eyes closed though, I quickly returned to staring at the clock as the second hand ticked out seconds that would surely lead to eventual answers. Every minute was interminable and the hands reached seven, then half past.

What if none of them came back? What if they were all killed and the vampires did come here? I filled in another few minutes working out a plan for getting Katie out of the house, if I needed to. There were no weapons in the house to attack the vampires with, nothing strong enough to harm them. My best option would be to get Katie to a car and drive. If the situation arose, I decided I would choose the fastest car in the garage and leave. It wouldn"t be safe to send Katie back to her elderly carer – what if the vampires tracked her back there. They"d followed my scent, I had no doubt they could follow Katie"s, too. Would they kill her? I would have to keep her with me, I decided.

I"d need money though. We could hardly leave without access to cash. I made mental notes of what to do, if another thirty minutes passed by and they still didn"t return. There must be cash somewhere in the house. Maybe we shouldn"t even stay in the United States; possibly, we"d have to leave the country to shake off those repulsive beings. Did Katie have a passport? I didn"t have one. That would be a predicament. With a criminal record, I had no likelihood of legally obtaining a passport. I distractedly wondered how you went about obtaining a passport illegally. It could be done, but I was certain there wasn"t an illegal passport office on every street corner—

illegallyMy ears picked up a tiny sound at the front door and I held my breath. Terror rapidly turned into relief as a key turned in the lock and the door swung open. My heart somersaulted as Ripley strode in, followed by Rowena and Acenith. Gwynn and William followed. They all looked a little worse for wear, their clothes torn and bloody – but they were alive. I waited anxiously, watching to see who else had survived.

“Where are the others?” I squeaked, when a few seconds passed with no further appearances.

Before Ripley could answer, Ben stepped through the doorway, followed closely by Striker, Marianne, and finally, Lucas.

Katie ran to William and Gwynn and I launched myself from the couch, limping swiftly towards Lucas. I didn"t care about being careful, didn"t care how my scent affected him, at this stage, I wasn"t even worried if he bit me. The gap between us narrowed and I threw myself into his arms, sobbing with relief.

Lucas held me close, whispering soothing words against my ear as I cried. The relief outweighed everything else and I didn"t need, or want, answers right now. It was enough that he was here, holding me, and everyone was safe.

“Take her upstairs to rest. It"s been a difficult night,” Ben suggested. “We can talk later.”

Lucas swept me into his arms and headed towards the stairs, stopped by Rowena at the base of the stairwell. She kissed my cheek softly. “Charlotte, thank you. You save us all tonight.”

I stared at her in disbelief; didn"t she realize if it hadn"t been for me, they wouldn"t have been in danger in the first place?

Lucas carried me upstairs to his bedroom, kissing my forehead repeatedly as I cried against his shoulder. “Shhh, my love. It"s all right, everything is alright now.”

He placed me down beside the bed and Marianne appeared. Her pink-streaked hair was disheveled and her clothing was torn and covered in dirt, but she smiled radiantly as Lucas left the room, closing the door quietly behind him. “You did a wonderful thing tonight, Charlotte,” she said, as she helped me undress. “Thank goodness you were here, or we wouldn"t have known what was happening. My ability is such a hit and miss thing, I"m too young yet for it to have solidified into a reliable power.” She smiled. “In another fifty years or so, Ben tells me my psychic ability will be firing on all cylinders. Until then, I"m just a baby vampire, with a fairly inaccurate power.”

I groaned and squeezed my eyes shut. “If it wasn"t for me, none of you would have been in that situation.”

“That doesn"t matter, Charlotte. You are safe, we are safe, and Lucas is happy,” Marianne responded quietly. “Let"s not worry about this for now – you look exhausted.” She slipped a negligee over my head. “Let"s get you into bed and you can sleep. You"ll feel much better when you aren"t so exhausted.”

She settled me into bed and when she opened the door, Lucas stepped through, his eyes filled with warmth when he smiled. Marianne called a soft goodnight and disappeared soundlessly down the hall.

I leaned back against the pillows, relieved and exhausted now it was over. My eyelids were heavy and my eyes stung from lack of sleep.

“Are you feeling a little better now?” Lucas sounded concerned, his forehead creased with worry.

I nodded, glancing up at him. It was the first time I"d actually taken a good look at him since his arrival home and I realized what a mess he was, after the fight. “Your shirt – it"s all torn.”

Lucas glanced down at his wrecked shirt and scowled. “I should go and change.”

“No! Don"t leave me, please?”

Lucas stood uncertainly for a moment, and then shrugged. “As you wish, my Charlotte.” He tugged at the buttons on his chambray shirt and shrugged it from his shoulders. The visual effect was overwhelming, it was the first time I"d seen him shirtless and I sucked in a steadying breath. Hard muscle ridged beneath his pale skin, creating solid pecs and an impressive six-pack, which made me want to drool. Small dusky pink n*****s stood out on his chest, covered with a dusting of fine dark hair and I longed to run my fingers across his skin, to see if the hair was as soft as it looked.

Lucas watched me from beneath hooded eyes, a knowing grin curving his lips. “If I"d known it would have this effect on you, I"d have taken off my shirt long before now.”

He dropped down onto the bed, pulling the quilt up to cover his chest, before taking me in his arms. He held me close, kissing my forehead repeatedly. When he spoke again, his voice was quiet. “Charlotte, you don"t need to worry about them anymore.”

“What happened?” I wasn"t certain I was ready to have this conversation, but I needed to know, wanted to confirm we were safe.

Lucas"s grip around my back tightened. “We were extremely fortunate you had contact with the spirits and sent the others. Without them, we were in trouble. A werewolf is a vicious predator, the natural enemy of the vampire. Why he chose to align himself with vampires, I cannot begin to guess. He was the most dangerous type of werewolf – young, easily led and not in full control of his abilities. It was a further stroke of good fortune that Ben accompanied Striker and me. Without his ability for diplomacy, they would have attacked immediately. Ben is an excellent negotiator; he was able to keep them talking for far longer than I could. It bought enough time for Riley and the other to catch up, and of course, their Kiss was then outnumbered, even with a werewolf in their group.”

The memory of Lucas killing Ambrose was replaying in my mind, like a horror movie on repeat. “They didn"t hurt any of you?”

“We are all unharmed.” He smiled grimly. “It appears I was incorrect about your psychic abilities – they are quite remarkable. Things would have ended badly without your assistance.”

“The spirits didn"t want to help me,” I admitted.

Lucas frowned heavily, c*****g his head to one side to stare at me. “What?”

Biting my lip, I explained the circumstances of my conversation with Mom and the other spirits. “What do you think it means?”

Lucas shook his head thoughtfully. “I have no idea. You say your mother suggests it was not her duty to warn others?”

“Yes, that"s what she said. Something about only warning me, it"s the rules.”

“And when you asked her who made the rules…”

“She didn"t answer the question. She just apologized,” I confirmed tiredly.

Lucas stared thoughtfully towards the window for a few seconds, his fingers twisting through the curls on my shoulder. “I honestly have no idea,” he finally admitted. “But it seems you convinced them to break these rules, whatever they are.”

“I was terrified. I thought you were going to die.” Tears welled in my eyes and I snuggled closer to his chest.

“I promised I would come home safely, love,” he responded softly, the strain of the past hours evident in his voice.

“I thought I was going crazy, I thought the others would think I was mad when I started getting messages about werewolves.”

“Charlotte, it is understandable that you find difficulty in making sense of this. You are not out of your mind. Werewolves are as real as vampires are. Although we don"t make ourselves obvious to humans, both vampires and werewolves have inhabited this planet for a millennium,” Lucas responded mildly.

“Did you— did they—” I choked up, unable to complete the sentence. The image of Lucas killing Ambrose appeared unbidden in my mind, making my stomach churn.

Lucas sighed heavily. “We had to kill the werewolf; he was too wild, very young, and extremely dangerous. We also killed one vampire. The other two capitulated and we allowed them to leave. They won"t come back here again.”

“How can you be so sure?”

“They won"t risk attacking the Tine Kiss again. We have proven our superiority and assured them we will not tolerate another reprisal.”

I wriggled until I could look into Lucas"s eyes. “This was my fault.”

“No, don"t think that Charlotte,” he responded softly. “From time to time, these situations arise for vampires. One Kiss will attempt to take over another; there are fights over land, disagreements between groups. By nature, we are bloodthirsty and combative, what happened here tonight is no different.”

“This wouldn"t have arisen,” I pointed out. “You were all in danger because of me.” I frowned pensively, forcing myself to voice my doubt. “Maybe you would be better off without me.”

Lucas brushed his fingers across my cheek. “You don"t honestly believe that? How could you imagine that I would want to exist without you in my life, when I"ve come to love you so deeply?”

“I"m not worth it, Lucas.”

Lucas gazed down at me, searching my face. “Why didn"t you tell me about the mental abuse your stepfather subjected you to?”

I felt my eyes widen. “How did you know about that?”

“I spoke with Ripley on the way back tonight.”

“Ripley should stay out of my head,” I muttered.

“Ripley said you were broadcasting so loudly, he couldn"t avoid it,” Lucas countered smoothly. “How he found out is beside the point.” He kissed my forehead softly. “Why didn"t you tell me?”

I shook my head. “It didn"t matter.”

“I think it mattered a great deal – it explains a lot about you.”

“I never let it affect me,” I bristled, angry at the implication. “He was a bully, he liked to heap abuse on everyone around him. They were only words.”

“Words that have had a greatly detrimental effect on your self-esteem,” Lucas pointed out. “You don"t think they have affected you – I assure you, I see the effect they have had and it makes me so furious, to think he did this to you.” He caught the tip of my chin with his thumb and lifted my head until I was looking at him. “Charlotte, listen to me. I love you, I think you are beautiful and kind and sweet and generous. You are the stars in my sky, the light in a perpetual darkness. My existence would be pointless without you. Despite what you believe – what that bastard told you – I am in love with you and find you absolutely worthy of my attention and my love and my desire.” He lowered his mouth to mine, kissing me tenderly as he whispered against my mouth. “If I could find a way to make it safe for you, I would be making love to you now – right this second – to try and prove to you how much I adore you and need you. I would fill your body with mine, join us as one, and worship you, as you deserve to be worshipped. I love you, you crazy girl.” He deepened the kiss, his tongue flicking across my lips as he sought entrance and I moaned softly in my throat, lust slamming into every nerve in my body. For a few minutes, we lay in a tangle of arms and legs as I sought to be as close to him as I could possibly be, with our clothes on. I trailed my fingers across his chest, brushing a finger tentatively across one erect bud and Lucas broke away, cursing beneath his breath. “Charlotte, you have no idea how much I want to make you mine,” he growled.

“I think I do,” I whispered, flopping back down against his chest, breathing heavily. A quick glimpse down the lean form of his body showed exactly how much he wanted it, if the tenting in his pants was anything to go by. I blushed and averted my eyes, snuggling against his shoulder. He made no move to get away from me, instead wrapping me up tighter against him and resting his chin against the top of my head.

We lay in silence for a long time and my eyelids began to droop with exhaustion. I heard Lucas inhale deeply against my hair and tilted my head so I could see his face. “I thought my scent was bad for you?”

Lucas grinned. “I never said your scent was bad for me. In fact,” he breathed deeply again and closed his eyes, “your scent is the most wonderful thing I have ever experienced. I am merely enjoying the aroma.”

I narrowed my eyes at him. “Doesn"t that lead to… biting?” His control had already been pushed to its limits in the past few minutes and I wasn"t sure it was a good idea for him to tempt himself even further.

Lucas chuckled, his expression filled with delight. “I won"t allow myself to taste the wine, as much as I crave it. I do believe I"m developing a good deal more control around the wine, however.”

“What does it feel like? When you crave someone"s blood?” He"d piqued my curiosity now, and bizarrely, I thought I would prefer this discussion to thinking about the night"s events.

Lucas rolled me gently onto my back and turned on his side to gaze down at me, his expressions serious. “Are you sure you want to know, Charlotte? I know you find my appetite for blood… unappealing.”

I flushed red and glanced away. I hadn"t realized I"d made my aversion so obvious. I thought I"d been keeping those thoughts to myself. Thoughts… Ripley. Damn it. I was going to talk to him and demand he stop reading my thoughts. I met Lucas"s eyes and he smiled.

Ripley“Yes, Ripley told me you were struggling to understand our blood craving. And no, you can"t keep him from your thoughts. As I told you, he does his best to avoid it, but if you are broadcasting clearly, he can"t help what he hears.”

“I"m sorry.” I dropped my chin, ashamed of myself. I"d always accepted everyone, regardless of his or her personal choices, race, color, or creed. Why was I having so much trouble with this? Because it involves drinking blood, of course. No matter how many ways I tried to analyze it, the drinking of blood was disgusting and whether it was human or animal blood was entirely irrelevant.

Because it involves drinking blood, of course.“Charlotte, look at me,” Lucas commanded.

I lifted my head and knew my sadness was visible on my face. I couldn"t understand, but if I was pursuing this relationship, I had to try. It was a non-negotiable situation.

Lucas rubbed his fingers against my cheek, his touch soothing. “It"s entirely reasonable for you to struggle with grasping our need for blood. It"s a natural response to be repulsed, relating back to the legends passed down from generation to generation. Vampires are evil, loathsome creatures who drink blood, the very concept of which is alien to the human population. Which is why we are the subject of horror stories and scary movies – we are supposed to be abhorrent to humans, we are meant to cause fear and trepidation.”

“I"m not frightened of you,” I responded hurriedly. “I know you won"t bite me.”

“As I have pointed out before, you have a great deal of faith in me, Charlotte. It may be misplaced faith. Whilst I still win this battle, it is not an easy path to follow.” Lucas frowned for a brief second, his eyes hard. “I"m learning to deal with my desire and whilst I find your scent as delicious now as the day I first met you, I"m beginning to control the urges which come naturally to me. But you must never forget – I am, and always will be, a danger to you.”

“Explain the desire. How does it make you feel, when you need blood?”

The frown reappeared on his brow, his eyebrows nearly meeting as he struggled with my request. “Once again, you bring up a subject which makes me fear you will run away screaming, if I give you the answer.”

“I haven"t run away yet,” I responded quietly. I brushed my fingers across his cheek and he caught them, pressing them to his lips for a kiss.

He drew a ragged breath and began to speak, his voice low. “The thirst for blood is as natural to us as your desire to eat and drink. Imagine you are in a desert and have walked for miles and miles, with no sign of water, nothing available to quench your thirst. The sun is beating down on you from above, and your throat is dry, so parched that it burns with the need for water.”

I nodded, my eyes remaining on his to try to prove he wasn"t frightening me.

“A vampire"s need for blood is similar in many ways, only much, much worse. The urge for blood when we need to feed, it causes a burning sensation in the throat that is like being caught in the flames of hell. The yearning is irresistible; the only thing in a vampire"s mind in those circumstances is the hunt for blood. Nothing can dissuade us from the goal.”

“And… that"s how you feel when you"re with me?” I asked cautiously.

Lucas nodded slightly and a smile played around his lips. “That"s one of the feelings I am dealing with when I am around you. For the most part, it"s the worst to control.”

one“But when you"ve been out and fed, it"s okay then, isn"t it?”

The shake of his head was infinitesimal, as if he didn"t want to admit to what he was thinking. “In normal circumstances, with anyone else, yes, the need for blood, the thirst is easily controlled. With you, however…” he shrugged and shook his head. “The thirst remains almost insatiable, all the time.”

“Why?”

Lucas traced a path along my arm with his fingers. “I have no idea. Something about you, your blood, is so powerful it makes me crave constantly.” He sighed, laying back against the bed and staring at the ceiling. “When I first met you, all I wanted to do was bite you, taste your blood, drain your body of every last drop. It was insatiable, completely overwhelming. I could think of nothing else for weeks.”

I thought about this for a minute or two and Lucas remained silent, letting me reflect in peace. “How close did you come? To killing me?”

Lucas squeezed his eyes shut and torment flitted across his face. “Very close. The first time I met you, I considered telling people I would take you to hospital and instead spiriting you away to feast on your blood. The craving – it was… almost impossible to control. Then I found myself visiting you in the hospital, even though I knew it was a mistake, masochism at its very worst. Yet I couldn"t stay away. I had to see you again, even while I was thinking of a hundred different ways in which I could draw you in, use my skills to capture you, taste your blood. I was constantly out of my mind.” He smiled ruefully at the memory. “After that, I tried to avoid you, knowing it was the best thing for you. But then I discovered your scent in the forest and took to following you each day. I couldn"t stay away, couldn"t stop myself.”

I tried to lighten his mood. “So I guess you became a stalker?”

“You could say that,” Lucas smirked. “As the days passed, although my desire was as strong as ever, you began to intrigue me. I wanted to know more about you, why you were always so sad. What caused your beautiful green eyes to be shadowed in perpetual pain? It came as quite a shock to realize I was falling in love with you.” He leaned forward and kissed my lips fleetingly. “It wasn"t until I rescued you at the falls, the day I took you to my home that I began to wonder if it was possible to control. If I could savor the wine, without drinking.”

“But you went back to avoiding me again,” I pointed out.

“Yes, I did. After I offered to drive you home. Until then I had been affected by your scent, but harbored hopes that I could control it. But having you in the car with me – it was sheer hell. Your scent was everywhere; I couldn"t avoid it and couldn"t escape it. In a ten-minute drive to your cottage, I realized that as much as I loved you, I couldn"t stop myself from hurting you. The thought was too much to bear, caused me agony. I stopped following you from that day onwards, refusing to go into the woods. I went to Europe to visit friends, hoping that being away from you would erase you from my mind.”

“It didn"t work out?” I guessed aloud.

“God, no. It didn"t work out. Every moment was still filled with you, every thought, and every minute of the day. It was a complete obsession – I decided to come back, and face up to it, try and find some way of working through it so I could be around you. The day I saw you in the grocery store – I"d only arrived back in Puckhaber that day. Having been away from your scent – and then to immediately meet it head on – it was unbearable. I wanted to kill you there and then. There were only a few people in the store, I could simply kill them and nobody would be any the wiser.”

A shiver of apprehension ran up my spine and the hairs on the back of my neck stood up at his confession.

“I knew I would frighten you,” Lucas groaned.

“Not so much for me,” I responded quickly, considering the thoughts churning through my mind. “I feel bad for the other people who were in the store. I still don"t believe you would really harm me.”

Lucas stared, shaking his head slowly. “You know, I think you really could be crazy.”

I grinned, combing my fingers through his dark hair. “Probably. What happened, why did you change your mind?”

“I spent hours talking with Ben, trying to find a solution.” He screwed up his nose. “Striker and Ripley both suggested I kill you and get it over with, put myself out of my misery.”

“Remind me to slap them, when I see them in the morning.”

“I wouldn"t recommend it. You"ll only break the other arm.” We shared a smile and I rolled my eyes.

“What made you decide to see me again?” I yawned heavily.

“Up until the day you were attacked, I still hadn"t made a decision. Ben was supportive, but he knew what I wanted was practically impossible, particularly given my reaction to you every time I saw you. I was torn between my conscience and my desire. Then Marianne had the vision of what was happening to you and when I got there and saw what Ambrose was—” Lucas held his thumb and forefinger to the bridge of his nose, squeezing his eyes shut. “I knew then I could never allow anything to hurt you. The love I felt for you was the most important thing in my existence and I knew I would do everything in my power to keep you safe.” He looked up at me and the depth of his love was clear in his eyes. “I knew then I would not be the one to hurt you, not if I could possibly help it. I couldn"t bear to stop myself from seeing you any longer and although my thirst for you was all-consuming, my love for you was just as strong.” He kissed my cheek tenderly. “So here we are. The vampire and his little baby bird.”

I smiled sleepily and Lucas caught me in his arms, settling my head against his chest once again. “Sleep, my Charlotte. Sleep and have sweet dreams. I will be here when you wake up.”