Forever His & His Ghost

Chapter 25: Going Back With Him

   Five weeks later I felt no better than the day I had woken up in the hospital. Clare had got to me within twenty-four hours but rented a car to drive us back. The doctors were worried about clots and stuff with high altitudes. I had finally gotten the nerve to call my mom and tell her that I wasn't coming back for graduation, Clare had talked to the principal, and he had allowed me to finish the semester out online, he said he would mail my diploma.

       Mom and Mark were the only ones who knew where I was, I hadn't even been brave enough to contact Marie, I knew she would push to find out what happened and then probably start trouble and I didn't want her to suffer the same wrath as me. I had talked to Mark a couple of times while I had been here and assured him, I was doing well, he threatened to come out here himself if I was lying, but even Clare vouched for me.

      Jaxon wasn't doing too good, evidently, he had turned back into the bad boy, I wasn't sure what that meant because I never saw that side of him, but Mark said he was drinking heavily, partying a lot and tearing the town apart trying to find me.

     "Skyla honey, dinner is almost done." Clare interrupted my thoughts as she stepped out on the patio.

      "Thanks, I will be in in a minute." I gave her a smile and returned my gaze to the ocean. Secretly I wished that it would work magic on me with its waves, washing over me like the sand and pulling all the debris away leaving it looking fresh and clean. I just shook my head and made my way in.

      Clare always knew what made me feel better, chili cheese tater tots and hamburgers, I think she was secretly trying to fatten me up with all the carbs she had been feeding me lately. I patted my stomach and felt the sadness wash over me like a spring rainstorm, they took my future away from me, they took any chance of me having my own family away. I really had never thought about having kids, but I would have liked to have had that option. Clare had taken me to a couple of specialist here and they all said the same thing, it was a slight possibility of a future pregnancy, but there was so much internal scarring and damage that it was a very slim chance, and even if I did get pregnant, I would probably never carry it full term.

     "Hey, it's all going to be okay." Clare patted my shoulder while sitting my plate down and then taking her seat. "So have you thought anymore about my thoughts on prom." I just shook my head, "But Skyla it is a right of passage, every young girl should get to get dressed up and go to prom. And I told you one of the local boys here would be glad to take you."

     "Thanks Clare, I do appreciate it, but I think I have had more than my fair share of this crazy world to last me a long time, I don't want to deal with anymore drama." She nodded her head dropping the subject and to that I was very grateful.

      We spent the rest of the dinner just making small talk, she was telling me about a new guy she had met, and how she really liked him and how he wanted to take her to Italy in a few weeks. She tried to ask questions as usual about Jaxon, but I just ignored like I always do and changed the subject. I told her my plans for after graduation and she was tickled to death to know I was going to stay close and pursue a writing career. After dinner I helped clean the kitchen up and put the dishes away, I was getting stronger every day, but sometimes simple tasks like this just took it out of me.

      My fingers had healed, they had taken the splints off and told me to take it easy, but in another few weeks they should be back to new. The bruising had finally gone away, there were a couple deep bruises on my abdomen that still had a little yellowish discoloration to them, but a few more days and they should be gone too. My ribs on the other hand were a different story, they were taking forever to heal, the doctors told me to put a compression wrap on them for about an hour a day and walk, said it would help keep my lungs strong without causing much pain.

     "I am going for my evening walk, be back in a bit." I kissed Clare on the cheek and made my way back outside.

     This was my favorite time of day on the beach, it was like the sun and the water were battling on the horizon, until their final dance when the water swallowed it hole. I kicked my shoes off and walked down the steps almost forgetting about all my injuries and leaping from the bottom step to the sand below, well almost, I caught myself just as I thought it. I stepped into the sand and buried my toes deep, feeling the slight breeze brush my face and send my hair flying in all different directions.

      The walk to my favorite spot near a rock levy was short, most people didn't venture to this area because it wasn't good swimming or surfing, but it was perfect for me. Sitting there I could let it all go, I could let my mind run as fast as it wanted to. I don't know where everything had gone so wrong, maybe if I had just stayed away, I wouldn't feel as broken as I did now, maybe if I had told Jaxon everything, we could have really gotten through it all together.

      My family I knew loved me, well mom, dad and Preston anyway, I am not sure what I ever did so wrong that my own sister hated me the way she did. Everything would get better though, it had to, I would finish school here online as planned, then off to college and then on to the big bad world, my heart would eventually heal, and I would move on. I mean who these days ever stay with their first love, their high school sweetheart, no one, it's just one of those fairy tale things.

      The clearing of a throat behind me brought me out of my thoughts and made me jump and whimper in my own skin, I didn't even have time to turn around before his voice reached my ears. "Do you know what I had to go through to find you?" He didn't sound angry, he sounded sad and broken, as broken as I felt. I slowly turned around and before I could blink Jaxon's arms were securely placed around my waist and pulling me closer. "Why did you run, why didn't you tell anyone where you were?" The care laced in his words brought tears to my eyes without even trying.

    "Jaxon what are doing here?" That was all I could say, I wasn't sure if this was a dream or real, he felt real, he looked real, but how could he be.

     "You left, you just disappeared, I called your parent's, I called Marie, I have searched every nook and cranny and you were nowhere to be found. Finally, I decided to track your phone, only to discover it was in the library at the school under a bookshelf." I looked up to see he was staring off into the ocean as I had been. "Skyla please tell me what's going on? We only have a week before prom and graduation, a week before you and I can make a break for it and never look back."

      I took a deep breath and carefully stepped back from his hold, only causing him to look at me with so much hurt my heart crumbled yet again for the thousandth time. "Jaxon, we can't do this anymore. Graduation is in a week yes, and you are right we can make a break for it, however not together." He tried to reach for me, and I stepped back yet again placing my hand up to make him stop. "You have to stop; I have to get this out." I took another deep breath, "What happened is over and done with, and I am fine now, but I can't go back, and this," I motioned between me and him. "This can't be, and probably should have never been." I slowly wiped the tears from my eyes that I hadn't even realized were falling, "Jax I will always love you, I will always be truly grateful for what we had, but this can't go any further." I slowly turned and started back down the beach toward Clare's.

       "No!" He shouted, just before I felt my arm being grabbed and I was whipped around so fast I almost fell, only to find myself being caught, yet once again. I looked up and there was a small smile across his face. "I told you, I would always catch you when you fell." I tried to stand and get away again, but he just pulled me closer. "No, Skyla I don't buy it, what's going on?"

      "Jax, we have been growing apart for some time, I am sure Samantha would make a better option for you, since you like spending so much time with her." I know that probably sounded petty of me, but everything was rushing back in so much force I couldn't hold my tongue, she told me while beating the living crap out of me he was with her, that she was doing a good job of making him hers, that I just needed to be out of the way.

      He didn't even flinch at the statement he only tightened his hold a bit more and placed his finger under my chin making me look him in the eyes. "Skyla, you are the only one for me. I am sorry if I have made you feel like I have been distant, there are some things going on with that side of the family and I have had to spend more time there than I would like to find out what is going on. But I swear I have never been alone with her, I do not want anything to do with her at all, and I am not leaving here without you." He wiped my tears away, "I love you."

        My small wall I was building crumbled just like that, it was gone. I knew that I couldn't walk away, I knew that it would always be Jaxon, just Jaxon. "I love you, you stubborn boy." The smile that spread across his face was infectious and left me with one to match his. He picked me up and spun me around, but just as quick as he had me up, he put me back down, the look on my face must have triggered him, because I instantly felt the pain in my rib cage of the damage.

      "What's wrong?" I shook my head trying to wiggle out of his arms. "Don't do that, tell me what's wrong?"

      I took his hand, maybe I can tell him some, but I can't tell him everything, he can't know, I just have to get through the next week. "Come on, let's go." I kissed his hand and led him back to Clare's while working in my mind what exactly was I going to say.

     "Here sit, I will get us some water." I pointed to my favorite lounge chair on Clare's porch. I was so happy that she didn't seem to be home in that moment. I was going to tell Jaxon what happened, but only to my truth and then get him to leave before she came home, maybe then he would never find out.

      He took his seat, and I went in to get us a couple bottles of water. When I returned, he was in the lounger, but he had his elbows on his knees and his head cradled in his hand. He was clearly in a battle with himself, and I wasn't sure how to help. I nudged him with the bottle, and he looked up giving me a smile, I turned to go sit in the other lounger and he had me in his lap with my back against his chest quicker than I could blink. "What are you doing?" I managed to giggle out.

     "I just found you again, no way am I letting you go." He kissed the top of my head. "Now tell me what's going on."

      I took a deep breath, okay Skyla, you can do this, just make him believe it, but don't give more details than needed. "Well, on Good Friday everybody was busy, and I wanted to get some studying in for the college exams, so I went to the school. It was open for all students, but no one was there but me, I was actually kind of excited I didn't have to deal with anyone and could actually study." My mind was going a hundred miles a minute trying to choose my words silently while speaking at the same time, "So I was in the library, and I heard a loud noise." Okay I got this; I smiled a little thinking about where I was going with this. "I ran out and tripped and fell down the stairs. I was knocked unconscious and when I woke up, I was already here, Clare is my emergency contact, so they sent me here. I had some cracked and broken ribs, and some bruising, but other than that I was okay, just had to recover. I didn't want to bother anyone with my condition because it was my fault, I was so clumsy." I probably should have told him about the rest of my injuries, but I wasn't ready to try and explain how falling down the stairs could cause that much.

       He was quiet, I thought maybe he had fallen asleep, I looked up only to see him studying me silently. "I know that's not what happened." I felt my heartbeat speed up, how could he know, did Mark say something. "I won't push right now, I have you in my arms, and I won't push you right now. But eventually you are gong to tell me the truth." He bent down kissing my forward before pulling me closer to his chest.

      The rest of the evening we were both silent, we spent it just enjoying being in each other's presence. True to his words, he didn't let me go, and if I tried to wiggle, he only tightened his hold, proving he wasn't letting me go. I don't know when I closed my eyes that night and let darkness overtake me, but it was the best night's sleep I had had in a long time, just being safe in the arms of the boy I knew I would only ever love.

     The morning came sooner than I would have liked, and I was woken up when the morning rays licked my face through the window of my room. I gently opened my eyes only to be met with Jaxon's handsome sleeping face. I looked around suddenly realizing we were in my bed; he must have moved us in the night. I tried to wiggle a little to go to the restroom and his arms only tightened around me and pulled me closer, it warmed my heart, this was the Jaxon that I fell in love with.

     "Would you stop wiggling; I am trying to sleep over here." His voice was soft and deep and ran shivers up my spine. I looked to see him smiling while his eyes were still closed.

      "I got to go to the bathroom."

     "Then I am going with you."

      That earned him a giggle, "No, I can go myself."

      He slowly opened his eyes and stared at me silently for a moment, "No, I let you go, you might disappear again." His words were so sincere and yet I could still hear the fear in his voice.

     "Jaxon, I am not going anywhere, I am just going to the bathroom and then how about some coffee and breakfast?" I kissed his lips softly, trying to show him I wasn't going anywhere. He was always so confident and brave and right now he was scared; it didn't suit him well at all.

     "Okay, but you got five minutes." He kissed me back slowly releasing me.

      We worked together fixing breakfast and some coffee, I had forgotten how well we moved with one another when we were together, our life felt like the perfect dance as we moved in tune to one another, never stepping in the other's way. Clare had left a note saying she would be out the whole day and we would fix dinner together when she got in this evening, so it would be just me and Jaxon for the day. I was nervous, we had been apart for awhile, and I wasn't sure where the day would lead us, but what the heck, I was going to go with it.

      "So," Jaxon drew out the so while putting the last of the dishes in the drain. I just looked up at him as I was wiping out the sink. "You are coming back with me, right?"

      I felt the air hitch in my chest, I hadn't even thought about it, but was I really going to go back, would it be safe, what if I brought harm to him or my family or friends. "I don't know Jax, I don't think that's a good idea. Besides I have it already arranged to finish everything this week on the computer and then get my diploma by mail." I turned quickly to finish what I was doing; I didn't want to see the emotion he was feeling in those eyes of his.

      "Then go back, you can stay with me, finish everything online, and as soon as we get our diploma's we can leave that town and disappear together in this big world."

      "Jaxon, we can't do that," he wrapped his arms gently around me and pulled me into him. "You will be leaving for college soon, I heard you got into Princeton, congrats by the way."

     "Doesn't matter where I got into, we can go, I will go wherever you want me to, as long as I am with you."

     "No, this is your dream. I would never hold you back from there. I only want you to follow your dreams and do your best. Besides you can go there, and I will go to UCLA like I always wanted. We can meet on breaks and a couple weekends, and you know technology these days is a funny thing, we can keep in touch."

     "Then I will stay here till you graduate college and then we will move out there and I will go to college while you start your career." My heart skipped a beat, he was willing to put everything on hold for me without a second thought, we can do this. We can be together.

      "Well then I guess I should confess." I smiled and almost laughed at the look on his face, it was a mix between shock and curiosity. "I applied for Columbia and got in. I was going to surprise you graduation day, but I guess now is as good a time as any."

      Once again, my feet were lifted off the ground and he was peppering my face with kisses as he gently spun me around the kitchen. "Are you serious?" He smiled sitting me back down gently. I nodded my head, returning his smile. "But Skyla I would never want you to give up your dreams for me, I will follow you anywhere, but I don't expect you to change things for me, I didn't ask you to."

      "You don't want me to go there?"

     He shook his head, "No it's not that at all, if you are there, we can share an apartment together, we can spend every moment together when we aren't in college and don't have to worry about anything but just being us."

     "But?"

    "But I didn't ask you to do this, and I don't want you to hate me later because I didn't let you follow your dreams."

    I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled him closer down to me, "I am chasing my dreams, but they are nothing if you aren't there with me to help me when I fall. So, this is final, I have already sent everything into Columbia, and they are expecting me in the fall." I softly kissed his lips, "And besides I could never hate you Jaxon Nyte, I love you." He crashed his lips to mine and I could feel every emotion he felt in that one mind blowing kiss.

     We pulled apart only to catch our breath and he placed his forehead on mine with a smile from ear to ear, "Then let's plan our escape for after graduation, and no more buts, you are coming home with me, I can't leave you here. Besides I already bought your return ticket when I bought my round trip ticket."

      I pulled back to look in his eyes, "How did you know for sure you would find me, and that if you did, I would go back?"

     He grabbed my hand and pulled me out onto the porch where he gently sat my down in his lap while stretching out on the lounger in the morning sun. "For one, I remember you telling me this is where you ran to the last time. And secondly, you were coming back one way or the other, if I had to tie you up and drag you back myself." He placed his hand on my cheek and I leaned into his touch gently closing my eyes. "Skyla, you are mine, as I am yours, forever. There is no way I will ever let you go, there is no way I will ever let you get away from me, my world is not worth living if you aren't beside me."

     "When do we leave?" I caved, I was going back with him, I felt the same as him and no one or nothing would ever change that or take that away from me.

     He pulled me into a hug against his chest, "Late tonight, we should be home by this time tomorrow evening, and be rested up before class on Monday."

      I simply nodded into his chest. The rest of the day we spent making our plans of what was to happen next. I made it perfectly clear that I was not going to go back to class, there was no way that I wanted to see Samantha and Darlene, I also made it clear I was not going to prom, and he was okay with that, evidently, he felt the same way I did.

      Our plan was to pack our bags the day before graduation, which was a week from today, that meant we would be packing prom night, which was the night before graduation. On graduation night, as soon as he got his diploma, we were hitting the road and driving to New Jersey. He said we would drive a few hours and then stop and get a room and leave from there the next morning. I was kind of happy about that, I wanted to get out of there while everyone was partying, and no one would realize we were gone. For now, it was simple, go back, hide at his place till the end of the week, then we would leave together to start our new lives. From there it was let's just get through college together and then make our plans together.

       Clare finally came home that evening, and I was surprised when she didn't even act shocked to see that Jaxon was there, they even spoke like they had talked a whole lot before that night. We made dinner and then bid our goodbyes to Clare as Jaxon packed me up and took us to the airport. Little did I know as I held his hand as we said goodbye to Cali and hello to Colorado, that would be the beginning of our biggest fight we would endure to stay together. Little did I know that in a week, life would never be the same again.