The White Wolf's Brother

The Funeral

After my mom fell asleep that day, she never woke up again. She slipped into a coma that night. She languished in a comatose state for about three days. Per her request, I kept her at home instead of sending her to the hospital. I have to admit, part of me was bitter. I thought I had at least a little more time than that. I thought when she stopped eating, I would still have at least a few more days with her, with hopefully at least a couple of those being "good" days. But the other part of me knew that that was being selfish, that I should be glad that she didn't suffer. I spoke to her doctors about it, and they explained to me that while some may languish for days, even weeks at a time, some others don't. Some just decide they're done fighting and, like Mom. are gone within days. I understood the scientific side of things, but I couldn't help but feel cheated, even though I knew it was selfish. 

  Carrie was an amazing friend through it all. Even though since another nurse handled grief counseling, her job technically ended when Mom died, she still came by for the next several days to help with planning a memorial for Mom and making sure I was eating and taking care of myself. She even cooked for both of us a couple of nights. 

  In our pack, the traditional way of memorializing a pack member was to cremate them them over a pit, allowing the smoke to carry their souls to the Moon Goddess. Normally I spurned pack tradition, just the way they had basically spurned us over the years, but Mom had said a few times that this was one tradition she actually liked and would like to have that happen at her own memorial. So, four days after she passed, that's exactly what we did. I was honestly surprised at how many pack members turned out for it. I don't know if it was out of guilt or duty, to be honest. I was especially shocked to see our Alpha there with his Luna and his Beta. Beta Darrius simply nodded to me, which I returned. But Alpha Shawn and Luna Talia came over to me. 

  "Todd, I'm so sorry for your loss," Alpha Shawn said as he held his hand out to shake. 

  "Thank you, Alpha," I replied as I shook his hand with such a firm grip that his eyes widened a little in surprise. My grandfather had taught me that a man's handshake is a way of conveying his self confidence. The firmer the handshake, the more self confident the man is. He'd worked with me over and over until he was satisfied that my handshake was strong enough, and I'd never forgotten that.

  "We're both sorry for your loss, Todd," Luna Talia said in her soft, sweet voice. "I got to speak to Sienna a few times, and she was always so kind. I wish she'd had an easier life."

  "Thank you, Luna Talia," I replied. I shook her hand as well, but eased up a little on the grip. I didn't want to break the Luna's fingers. "My mom always spoke very highly of you." That much was true. My mom didn't have many positive things to say about most pack members, but Luna Talia was one of those people that you just couldn't help but like. 

  With his shoulder length blonde hair (which he normally tied back) and green eyes, and her waist length blonde hair and sparkling blue eyes, they made a striking pair. Even she was tall for a woman at 5'11, she still fell several inches short of his 6'5. And with her being a slim 150 lbs and him being a muscular powerhouse at 240 lbs, he looked like he could snap her in half with just the twitch of a finger. But everyone in this pack knew that he practically worshipped the ground she walked on, and vice versa. It was nice to see a young couple so much in love. I know it's probably kind of weird for an eighteen year old guy to be thinking things like that, but I couldn't help it. I hoped that one day, I would find my own mate and she would look at me the way Luna Talia and Alpha Shawn looked at each other. 

  "Would you mind if I say a few words for your mom?" Luna Talia asked. "Normally Shawn would, but I asked if I could since I knew her better."

  I hesitated. I hadn't planned on anyone except Carrie and myself saying anything. I figured, if anyone wanted to say anything, they should've said it while she was alive, not waited until she was gone. But I knew my mama would be utterly mortified if I had disrespected the Alpha or Luna, so I nodded. "Sure. If you want, you go first. Carrie will go next, and I'll go last. I'll let Carrie know."

  She nodded. "That's perfect. I promise, I won't take very long. I just want people to know what a sweet friend they missed out on. Before she got sick, when she was cooking at the packhouse, we would talk sometimes and she was always so sweet. I never believed any of those lies that were told about her. I offered several times to try to set the pack straight, but she always said no, just to leave it be. I guess she didn't want painful memories dragged out into the open."

  I nodded. "She used to tell me about the talks the two of you would have. And you're right, she didn't want those old memories dragged for everyone to hear about. She mentioned a few times that you wanted to set everyone straight. Thank you for that. I think you're the only person who offered to do anything like that for her, and it honestly made me respect you so much more. Thank you for at least trying, Luna."

  She smiled. "Please. Call me Talia. And you're welcome."

  "Thank you, Talia," I replied. "Now, if the two of you don't mind excusing me, I need to get this rolling."

  "Of course!" Talia replied, and Alpha Shawn just smiled at me. Talia gave me a quick hug, Alpha Shawn shook my hand once again, and I walked away to find Carrie. 

  I couldn't find her right away, so I mind linked her. 'Where are you?' I asked.

  'Sorry,' she replied, 'one of the omegas was having a hard time carrying everything, so I'm in the kitchen. I'll be right out,' she replied quickly.

  'Ok, that's fine,' I responded. 'I just wanted to let you knew that Luna Talia wants to say a few words. I told her she could go first.'

  'That's fine,' she told me. 'See you in a second.'

  Soon we had the funeral underway. The fire was going, and the smoke was drifting to the heavens above and Mom's ashes were beginning to fall into the fire clay container beneath the pyre her body was on. Talia gave a beautiful, short speech about how Mom was a hardworking she-wolf that always put everyone else ahead of herself. She also mentioned how much my mom loved me and said that Mom had mentioned to her several times how proud she was of me. I had to smile when I heard that.

  Carrie was next. Her speech was a little longer and more detailed, since she knew Mom better than anyone except me. She talked about how she'd learned so much from Mom. She talked about Mom's love for nature, and about how the two of them would giggle for hours over the silliest things. She talked about Mom's love of old classic TV sitcoms and how they'd watched "an ungodly number" of I Love Lucy reruns. She ended with saying that she was a little jealous of the Moon Goddess, because "now my friend is with her and I'm still here."

  When my turn rolled around, I did my best to convey to everyone there what a strong, amazing she-wolf she was, while struggling to hold back my tears. What I really wanted to do was to lay into them for the way they'd ignored her all these years, but I knew Mom wouldn't have wanted that. When I got done speaking, I went back to the spot where I'd been standing on the stage. Carrie reached over and gave my hand a friendly squeeze, silently telling me I'd done a good job. I squeezed hers back before releasing it with a sad smile. Then she stepped over to the funeral pyre and, after whispering a few words - I'm assuming a goodbye to Mom - she tossed one of the two white roses she was carrying into the fire. She had told me beforehand that white roses were used to convey innocence and youth when used at a funeral. She said that it broke her heart that Mom had died so young, and since she'd never even looked at another guy since Kade rejected her, still so innocent. 

  When my turn came, I stepped forward carrying two red roses. Red roses were Mom's favorite. I knelt down in front of the pyre. "I miss you already, Mom," I whispered. "You were the most amazing woman on Earth. One day, Mom, I'll find my mate and we'll have a beautiful family. I'll tell my mate all about my wonderful mother, and I'll tell my pups about their amazing grandmother. And I promise you, Mom, I will find Kane, and he will pay for what he did to you. I don't care if it takes years, he will pay." I gently tossed one of the roses into the fire before standing up and walking back to where Carrie stood, wiping away the tears that had escaped my eyes to roll down my cheeks. 

  Carrie gave me a quick one armed hug before turning to address the crowd. "Thank you all for coming out today. I know Todd appreciates it, and I'm sure Sienna would have too."

  I managed to choke out a 'thank you' before turning and walking off of the stage with Carrie right behind. Honestly, I would've much preferred it to just be Carrie and I sending her off, but that wasn't what Mom had wanted. But seriously, where were all these people when Kane rejected her? Where were they when she was sick? Turning their backs, that's where they were. I had no plans to stick around. Mom may have had some kind of misguided sense of loyalty to this pack, but I sure as h**l didn't.

  "Todd?" I heard a female voice call my name. I turned to see an older woman in a blue pantsuit standing there. She had never spoken to me before, but I knew exactly who she was. My so-called grandmother.

  I glared at her. "What do you want?" I snapped at her. Was it rude? Maybe. But she'd been the one to basically call my mom a w***e and flat out said I wasn't their son's and that they wanted nothing to do with me. I saw no reason to be nice to her now.

  She looked taken aback. "Oh, I, um, I just wanted to give you my condolences. I'm - "

  "I know who you are," I snapped. "You're the woman whose son rejected his mate that adored him after a night of mating with her. You're the woman who believed his lies about her sleeping around when in fact he took her virginity and she never even looked at another man afterwards. You're the woman who, because you chose to believe those lies, turned her back on her own grandchild. I know exactly who you are, Madelyn Jackson. Now, for the last time, what do you want?"

  She narrowed her eyes. "Well, I was going to offer the proverbial olive branch, but I see your mother didn't bother teaching you any manners."

  I had to shove Dion back down, as he was clawing to get out and take her down. 'No, Dion! Doesn't matter how much of b**ch she is, we can't take out an old she-wolf. I've got this.'

  'You better,' he snarled.

  I focused back on the she-wolf in front of me, who was still glaring at me. "My mother taught me plenty of manners," I informed her icily. "If she hadn't, I would've let my wolf out to take you out just now, like he wanted. And I seriously don't care about any olive branch you want to offer. That ship sailed eighteen years ago, lady. Now, if you'll excuse me, I've got much better things to do." 

  With that, I turned on my heel and walk away. Carrie, who'd been standing beside me the entire time, simply shrugged at her as if to say, "What can you do?" before turning to walk away with me, leaving her spluttering in anger behind us. 

  I couldn't help be to feel vindicated. So many times in the past I'd wanted to march up to her when I saw her around and give her a piece of my mind, but Mom always begged me not to. Mom was very non-confrontational and just the thought of confrontation upset her, so I avoided it. But when that woman not only dared to try to speak to me at my mother's funeral, then suggested my mother didn't teach me manners, I'd had enough. It felt good to finally tell the old bat exactly what I thought. 

  Carrie looked at me as we walked out towards her car. "I cannot tell you how happy I am that someone finally put that woman in her place. She always walks around here like she's better than everyone, pretending her s**t don't stink. And I'm even more glad that you're the one that did it."

  I grinned at her. "I can't tell you how good it finally felt to let her have it. I've wanted to for as long as I can remember but Mom always stopped me. Felt good to finally let it all out. Besides, I doubt I'll ever get another chance."

  She raised an eyebrow. "Why not? You going somewhere?"

  I nodded and took a deep breath. "I've decided to go rogue."