Write on me

Chapter 29| Am I going to make your hit list?

I had always thought that one day I would possibly take the plunge and just try out some make-up to school.

Maybe the school dance would have been it, even though I hadn’t gone in years I had told myself that I would go this year just because it was the last opportunity that I would get to attend.

I didn’t think the day would come quite so soon though as I gently placed the concealer beneath my eyes to try and hide the fact that I had barely slept and cried myself to sleep.

Melissa had suggested that I just call it a sick day, but I couldn’t see heartbreak as a plausible reason to drown in my sheets for another day. I had probably dried myself out with all the tears that were shed as I updated my sister on what had been happening in my life.

After it was all out I had wondered why I had even bothered thinking I had to keep it from her, so I didn’t feel embarrassed when I now knew what true embarrassment felt like.

“How do I look?” I questioned as I turned in the seat.

We were parked in school but had yet to leave the car, much to the dismay of everyone else who had their eyes on our car.

“As good as can be. The hoodie is kind of overkill” She stated rather bluntly but I suppose I had a good one day of her treading lightly with her words.

“Wearing sunglasses would have been overkill. I need something to drown in and since it won’t be my bed, this will have to do.” I shrugged.

I would be under a magnifying glass for the day so at least I would be comfy while being mocked and judged like the good old days.

“You should watch out, you are starting to sound just like me” She teased while I sighed but not due to her words really.

I glanced out of the window at as many of the students that I could see, “What if he is here today?”

“That would be the reason why I suggested that you not go for the sluggish vibe and show him what he is missing” She narrowed her eyes.

“I just want to be invisible today, it was okay when they were judging me and making up their own rumours. It was annoying, and it hurt but I like to believe I had grown a thick skin to it. Now they have pure confirmation of how much of an embarrassment I am…”

“Oh please. You were probably the last one at this school to puke on someone at a party. I am not saying they won’t be a pain for today and maybe even the rest of the week but they will get over it. We go to school with a bunch of animals, someone will do something crazy this weekend.”

Apart of me knew she was just trying to play it off to make me feel better because the little bits I remembered made me cringe so I could only imagine how it looked to those observing.

She was right though, next week something else would happen and my embarrassment would possibly be old news.

I had my fingers and toes crossed for that.

“I appreciate what you did for me yesterday. I really needed it.”

She had covered for me with our parents even though they probably suspected I had celebrated too hard, them just having a slight idea was enough. I would probably be banned from leaving the house for life if they knew the entire story.

“So did I.” She winked before I glanced at my watch and knew we really needed to make our way out.

We exited the car and grabbed our bags while several eyes were on us or rather me. It was the first time I had probably stolen the shine from my sister and it was for all the wrong reasons.

I saw Adam but unlike everyone else, he avoided looking at me and surprisingly Melissa as well as he moved past us.

I glanced at Melissa and she simply shrugged and seemed unaffected by him choosing not to acknowledge her.

I felt like I was missing something but walked on with my sister by my side because I would most likely find out sooner or later.

“If you need me at all today, just come and find me” She whispered before she left my side.

She had a cheer meeting before school so unfortunately, she couldn’t be with me until class started, even though it would have been nice.

I held my head down as several whispers filled my ear, little snickers and several eyes fell on me.

I didn’t see the figure waiting at my locker and I shouldn’t have been surprised by it but it did give me a taste of what things would be like from now on. I didn’t see how I could give the benefit of the doubt to Dane when there was no way of getting out of it. He couldn’t have just forgotten about the fact that he had a girlfriend.

She seemed so excited at the thought of seeing him, so they must have been keeping in contact over the months they had been separated.

The months he had spent following me around, pitching up wherever I was and invading my life until I couldn’t really picture it without him.

I entered my first class because it seemed to be the only place where I wouldn’t have everyone looking at me, laughing and making little remarks.

I was back to hiding, hiding from Dane, hiding from everyone.

“Emily” I stopped in the doorway when I should have known she would be there.

I couldn’t place when I had last seen her at the party, I recalled us dancing and her telling me to take it easy.

“Hey, how are you feeling?” She questioned softly and sincerely as I moved towards her desk in the middle of class.

“You’re not going to make fun of me?” I cringed slightly as I had vague bits of information that filled my mind.

I was sure that I had blocked out most of it because the only image that lingered was me puking on Dane.

Yes, the little vengeful side that existed in me believed that he might have deserved that but I felt like it had caused me to feel worse due to the embarrassment of it all.

Despite my anger towards him, he was still someone that I liked.

I doubted that I even needed to try and dodge him at school because he had probably decided then I wasn’t worth keeping as a side chick, not that I would have ever knowingly been one though.

“Why would I? Nights like that happen to the best of us, I just wish I had been there to make sure it didn’t happen to you.” She sighed, and I didn’t like that she sort of took the blame.

I had been the one to mess up and overdo it because I honestly wanted to drown out my feelings concerning Dane.

I leaned back against the desk in front of hers as I stared down at her while I held my textbooks firmly to my chest, “I don’t think anyone could have prevented it because Dane would have still shown up and obviously everybody now knows how horrible things are between us”

“Maybe you see it as horrible and broken but I don’t think he does. I am not sure what happened, and I think it would be better if I didn’t know the full extent of things and pretend I didn’t hear everything you said to him. Because we both know I can make some pretty reckless decisions when my friends are hurt”

I giggled with a small nod as her impulsive words had led to Adam and Dane colliding.

“I am not sure when he showed up. I was on a call with my mom annoying me and when I got off I came looking for you and saw him pulling Liam away from you.”

Liam…

“Well, if I needed any further sign for me to crawl back into my comfort zone I think this past weekend was it.” I shook my head as I had let everyone see sides of me they never had.

They hadn’t even heard me raise my voice before and I clearly remember screaming at Dane while he had been weirdly calm for most of it.

“No! Don’t do that, it really wasn’t that bad. Yes, you probably woke some of Ashley’s neighbors with your screaming and puked on him but both of them brushed it off. I doubt he would have escorted us to your house if he hadn’t” She smiled to try and make me feel better but I wasn’t sure what she meant.

“What do you mean?”

“Didn’t your sister tell you?”

“Tell me what?”

“I drove the girls home, you included, and he followed behind me to make sure you got home safely. He literally carried you to your room.”

He was in my room.

I closed my eyes and wanted to crawl into a very deep hole, no one had ever seen my room and the last thing I wanted him to see was my insane number of stuffed animals and posters.

She giggled while I didn’t find it amusing at all, “But seriously, how are you feeling? I have seen you two argue before but that was really intense, and you were so upset.”

“I don’t know why I was so upset. I embarrassed myself and him and well the team.” I shook my head and clutched my books tighter to my chest.

“I just told you, they got over it. Yes, the school might be obnoxiously enjoying the drama, but we were just concerned about you because you are always so well put together in your own way”

“Turns out when I allow life to happen to me I can be quite a mess” I sighed, and the bell went off.

“You are hanging with us during break and you can’t argue” She narrowed her eyes as I picked my backpack up while the class slowly filled up.

“I guess I will be seeing you at lunch again” I smiled and moved to the back to my seat.

I saw Liam enter and take his seat at the front with a visible blue eye and I sunk further into my seat.

I owed him an apology for kissing him and thinking of someone else and the apology he would never get from Dane.

I wished I didn’t remember the sloppy kiss though.

●●●

Melissa pov

“Can we please just talk, Meredith?” I watched as Dane held onto her arm but she quickly shrugged him off.

“I think I have said enough to you. Please leave me alone” She left his side and met up with me.

“Hey, are you okay?” I questioned her as I had waited for her at the bottom of the steps.

“Yes. I just have to get to work. Why didn’t you tell me about Dane being in my room?” She moved closer to me as she whispered.

“You didn’t ask me how you got home, and I didn’t feel the need to let you know that he was in your room because it doesn’t matter. Things are over with you too, right?”

She didn’t respond.

I frowned as she had been so depressed over the weekend and made it clear she had no intention of giving him any of her time.

“Meredith, I know he might show that he cares about you, but the bigger picture is that he has used you.” I pointed out which might have been blunt, but I knew as her sister I needed to be blunt in this situation.

I had listened to her and been there for her the weekend because she was emotional, and I didn’t think it was the right time to bring it up.

“I know that, I really don’t need a reminder.” She sighed.

“I kind of feel like my job is to remind you so he doesn’t just lure you in with his charm once his girlfriend leaves town again” I wavered.

“I need to go, Mel. I will see you at home” She waved before she walked off and I saw her walk towards the girl named Emily’s car so I guess she was dropping her off at work.

I didn’t want her to be mad at me but I knew all her new little friends would support whatever she wanted to do and while that was great. My sister didn’t have any experience with guys so she needed someone who had her best interests at heart in her corner, who would do things that needed to be done.

I spotted Dane who stood by his motorcycle and watched as he stared at Emily’s car leave the school. I made my way over to him knowing that my sister had just left and he noticed me approaching.

“Can we talk?” I folded my arms as I reached him while he killed the cigarette he had apparently been smoking which was definitely not permitted on school premises but I chose to overlook it for now.

“Why would we need to talk?” He questioned but didn’t bother looking at me.

I wondered what my sister saw in him besides the obvious physical attraction because his voice never held any emotion and he always seemed so uninterested.

She obviously got a different side of him.

“I saw you trying to talk to my sister”

He lift his head to look at me, his grey eyes were narrowed at me. “Then you also saw her telling me to leave her alone and I did.”

“I know guys like you though. You can be very persistent, but can you please not knock down her door every day. I had to deal with picking up the pieces of her brokenheart this weekend...”

“I would get off your high horse, if I were you” He cut me off.

“What is that supposed to mean?” I glared at him due to some actual emotion filling his voice but it wasn’t a good kind.

His jaw clenched as he turned his body to me, “There’s a reason I punched your boyfriend that couldn’t stop talking s**t about her and that shouldn’t have been my job to do. You’re her sister.”

I briefly glanced away before I stared at the guy that had only known us for a few months trying to lecture me on looking out for my sister. “Adam might have been out of line with what he said about her but if she had waited to tell me instead of running to you then I am sure that my boyfriend wouldn’t have left school with a black eye that day”

“I have knocked guys twice his size out with my fist. I could have done far worse to him but because of Meredith, I didn’t.”

“But you couldn’t stop yourself from being a cheater in the name of my sister though?” I snapped.

“I would stop talking if I were you”

“Why? Am I going to make your hit list?” I blurted out before I could stop myself but kept my stance as I raised my eyebrow at him because I wasn’t going to dare let him think he could intimidate me.

He shook his head and grabbed his helmet from the compartment. “I liked you a lot better before you became a popular b***h”

“What did you just call me, I…” He cut me off as he started his engine before he drove off while I was left standing there confused by his words.