Soren's eyes track mine and he sees it before I can hide it. "What are you afraid of?"
Many things. I've been scared of way too many things since before I can remember. Since I was little. Betrayal, vulnerability, helplessness, worthlessness, failing the one person who meant the world to me. But there were the big three that followed me wherever I went, that hung on my shoulders heavily.
The fear of entrapment. Abandonment. And being attracted and attached to the very thing that could break me.
Soren scares me because I have grown attached to him, whether I wanted to or not.
I don't tell him any of that. No. Being a f*****g masochist, I seek to break and ruin the moment by speaking of something else. Something less arousing and more disturbing. "I have been having dreams of Landon's fa
