Mate revealed

“you ‘wishin you ‘nev said fat!”

Ester’s lungs exhaled as her legs stretched out to keep up her pace. The shadows cast by the canopy above felll over her, like a cloak. The crunch of forest decay echoed beneath her feet. The light above dimmed, suddenly, as if a candle was blown out. She slowed and looked up, but all that looked back was the darkened tree tops, a few quiet stars gleaming beyond.

A subtle mewing pulled her gaze backdown.

Her heart lurched. Coddled in a white blanket lay a baby, just days old perhaps. A pale half-moon pattern was the only decoration, alongside the red initials ‘A.S’. And around the baby,

Ester’s arms were wound, protectively.

Lights began to ribbon through the trees either side of her. Them, Ester thought - she wasn’t alone now.

Torches, blazed.

A new fear stretched in her limbs. Voices bled into the forest. Shouting. Calls. Grunts of exertion. The stomp of jogging.

Something told Ester she needed to hide. To remain unseen. The baby in her arms mewled again, a dainty arm escaped the blanket and reached blindly for her.

“I scent her!” The voice growled through the forest. Closer now. Masculine. Menacing.

Ester’s heart plummeted. Her grip tightened carefully on her bundle.

Her legs began to run before she could even tell them too. Twigs, branches and leaves gave her away as they break under her footfalls.

“This way! She’s this way!”

The flaming torches chased her through the dark. The plume of her breath staining the air before her.

Their pursuers began to close the gap. The distance between them lessening. The skin of the back of Ester’s body burned in tension.

Then, another voice, softer but still male but deeper, with authority rang out ahead; “Astra, just a little further.”

Shrieks leapt up behind them. Bodies tumbling to the ground. Cries of pain. Cries of agony.

The hunters fell away.

“You’re so close now, Astra” The voice was softer still, tender, loving, “just a little further.” With her legs still pumping, Ester looked down and saw the baby and blanket had vanished. “Wake up now” he urged her, “wake up and keep going.”

Ester bolted upright. She gasped for air like she was breaking the surface of water. Her lungs sawed, starved of oxygen.

She flung her body back against the white bedding. She was alone. Her body still in varying states of ruin. The pain hadn’t yet stirred. The sunlight was tinged afternoon. The sliver of sky Ester could see between the white curtains was a fuzzy pink with whispy clouds tacked on.

“Astra” she whispers to herself. The curtains stirred gently, as if by some unseen breeze. A line of goose bumps scurried up her arm and under her hospital gown.

“Astra” She repeated, louder this time. And, as if the window were wide open, the curtains billowed again, more noticeably this time.

A nervousness bloomed across the chest. She opened her mouth for a third time, but the door pushed open before she could utter anything.

“You’re awake!” Emma smiled, as if she’d preformed a great trick. “How’re you feeling?” She placed a cool palm on Ester’s forehead, who arched into it absentmindedly.

“Tired” And it’s true, even if she hadn’t realised until the words were spoken. But she'd only just woken up.

“Of course,” Emma sat down beside her, pulling Ester’s blanket back up around her as she did, “Sleep now then”

“Before I do, Emma” Esters’ voice already sagged in fatigue “You told me once you were… you felt the burning feeling, the dreams… Tell me about him. Please?”

Emma looked down, becoming consumed with picking at her fingernail.

Ester immediately regretted asking: “You don’t have to-“

“No,” Emma looked up, “No, that’s ok. I haven’t spoken of him in so long.”

Ester’s lips turned down at her foreboding words.

“He was – He was so beautiful. I’d known him my whole life,” She began, looking up towards one of the windows, “one of my first memories was of him punching Brock Vaughan on the nose-”

“- the guy that works at the grocery store?!”

Emma chuckled gently “Yes, I think he’d tugged on one of my pigtails. And… T barrelled over and pushed Brock over. Brock never so much as looked at me again. Still doesn’t!” She laughed “But it wasn’t until middle school that we really became friends.” Ester watched as her companion’s eyes gleamed as she relived memories, her mouth fixed in a contented smile, “It felt like his sole purpose at school was either to make me laugh or to look out for me.

“Back then, I could never of guessed that-“ She broke off and looked back down to her fingernail once more. Ester wanted to put her hands over Emma’s, but her limbs felt like lead.

“It was the last year of junior high that everything began to change. I felt… odd around him. He stopped making me laugh so much and started looking at me as if I was something rare. Something he couldn’t look away from.” Her cheeks burned red “That summer I hardly saw him. I phoned a couple of times, but his family always said he was out. Then Freshman year came, new school. And I remember, he stood there, leaning against his locker, as if he’d known I was coming down the corridor. I guess, he must’ve known. Scented me.”

Ester frowned. 'Scented?' Had she misheard? She was sure she'd had heard that phrasing before. Her eyes were growing heavier.

“And my skin began to tingle, to burn, the closer I got to him. Like I was getting closer to a bonfire. He’d grown up during the summer-”

Ester’s mind conjured the image of Lucca like smoke. She could almost feel the tingle, the burn as she got closer to him.

She was desperately clinging onto consciousness, wanted to gobble up every word Emma spoke, but sleep was pulling her away slowly.

“- I saw the girls watching him. Gosh, I got so jealous. I was green. I wanted to kiss him then and there to stake my claim.”

Ester tried to laugh, but instead made a clumsy snort instead.

“But he’d never take his eyes off of me. Every time I was near him I felt like I’d combust, and whenever he wasn’t around, I wouldn’t stop thinking about him…”

In that moment, between Emma’s calm voice and the sinking sun, Ester drifted off to sleep once more and into Lucca’s arms.

“I want you more than anything I’ve ever f*****g wanted”

* * *

Ester was awake at moments and then next would find herself waking again – the sunlight, or moon light, crept through the curtains depending on when she found consciousness. She could never sense when she was about to drift off.

Sometimes, she’d feel a warmth, a vanish of heat rolling over her skin, which would tug her from sleep. Her flesh would tingle, fizz. But, when she opened her eyes, she’d be alone.

A handful of days later, she woke up to Emma’s humming. A breeze from the fan grazed against her arm, and Ester realised her cast had been removed.

Gradually, as the days stretch, and Ester fought to stay awake.

Then a strange memory landed on her quietly, like a ladybird on her arm she could hardly feel it.

A kiss. Her fingers went involuntarily to her forehead. She could almost feel the warmth of his lips as if he’d only just placed it there.

Lucca?

Had he visited her last night?

She signed, and sat back, taking in her surroundings, and it’s clear the room wasn’t built for purpose. The windows were two large wooden sash windows. The glass in some parts looked warped as if very old.

Everything was white, the walls, bedside table, a cabinet in the corner, even the wooden floors were painted white.

Ester looked across at Emma. Most days she spent doing something on her laptop or flicking through a magazine.

“Where do you sleep?” Ester asked quietly, startling Emma.

‘You’re awake!” Emma grinned. Her dimples showed.

“Emma, where do you sleep?” Ester repeated, not unkindly

But before Emma could respond, Ester’s eyes followed Emma’s gaze to the lonely bed next to Ester’s.

“Oh Emma, a hospital bed?” Ester murmured, “Surely you’ve got things to do besides babysit me?”

Emma smiled warmly, “Don’t worry Ester, I was sleeping there at first, but not anymore. You snore like a hog you know” and winked,

“Can’t be worse than you’re humming,” Ester smiled back.

“No, I have a little house here, tucked away.” Ester finished.

They sunk into a comfortable silence for a few moments, Emma fiddling with a bundle of knitting. The delicate, small sounds of the pins clacking together every few minutes.

“Emma?” Ester murmured, her hand had absentmindedly wandered up to her forehead once more, as if she could feel the kiss she knew had been planted there hours ago.

“Mmm-hmm”

“Does Lucca ever visit?”

Emma’s knitting pins paused for no more than a heartbeat and then recommenced. “Why’d you say that?”

“Because I think he visited me last night,” Ester murmured.

“Oh?”

Ester let the conversation go as she felt her fatigue begin to grip her. After a few minutes Emma huffed loudly and bundled her knitting back into her bag, unconsciously retangling all the of those she’d untangled.

She then produced to little bottles of nail varnish from the bag, once pink, the other orange.

She held them up to Ester for her silent advice, and Ester playfully pretended to shoot the orange bottle.

“Pink it is,” Emma murmured quietly, rolling up the hem of her jeans.

“What is it they’ve had me on? Morphine? Diamorphine? Oxycodone? Pethidine?”

“I have no idea, maybe Morphine? Doctor Collins prescribed it, and then we just keep sticking in your IV thingy” Emma waved her hand at said IV currently nestled into Ester’s elbow crease. When did Doctor Collins last come? She couldn't remember her ever coming. What about Ester’s job at the practice in town? Would she lose it?

Then she thought about her tablets. She was sure no one here would know she'd need them. When was the last time she'd taken them?

“Emma, can I… do you think I could speak to my sister now?”

Emma’s head snapped back to hers, in panic. Then trying to wipe it from her face, she looked back down at her pastel pink toenails, and screwed the vanish bottled closed.

“Umm, I don’t see why not… but let me just check with-“

“Emma she’s my sister, please” Ester’s eyes were huge as they pleaded with Emma.

She rolled her eyes “Oh alright then”, and dug out a smartphone from her pocket. Emma already had Penny’s number saved, once she pressed it and handed it to Ester, she stood and went to the door “I’ll give you some privacy.”

“Emma” Ester called “I’m guessing she’s still not allowed to come over yet?”

Emma grimaced and shook her head.

“And, Penny will probably ask, have they… found the person who did this to me?” It was an accident, wasn't it?

Another grimace and shake of the head “Sorry Ester, but Lucca’s on it, believe me. And the sheriff of course”

Lucca's on it.

Emma closed the door behind her and on the third ring she heard: -

“Penny Croft speaking.”

“Penny” Ester breathed down the phone in relief. Her eyes watered and a lump in her throat formed instantly.

“Ester?” She murmured back in disbelief “Oh Ester! Oh I’ve missed you so much” Her voice was thick with emotion, and she could her hear starting to crying.

Ester herself wiped away the tears from her own face. She hadn’t realised how much she’d missed her, even half conscious. Her sister was the other half of her. Her best friend. How had so gone so long without speaking to her? Why had she decided to travel to another continent, away from this vitally important person? She needed Penny like she needed air.

“It’s wonderful to hear your voice Penny”

“How’re you doing? How do you feel?” She sniffed. Ester imagined her running her hands through her dark hair, her eyes red, her face puffy. For all her beauty, Penny had never been an attractive crier. The thought made Ester smile, despite herself. She'd always teased Penny about it.

“Fine” Her automatic response slipped before she could stop it, “Well actually a bit delicate, but a hell of a lot better than I was”

“Oh Ester, I should’ve been there, I should be there now. I can get on a plane right now. I don’t know why I let him talk me o-”

“No! Not just yet – it would be pointless, I should be moving out soon” I hope, she thought.

“And then you’ll come home?” Penny’s voice was brittle.

“Home?” Ester frowned.

The picture of Lucca popped into her head for a moment, but she shook it away at once. Slowly the skyline of London trickled into her head. Sunshine overhead at Hyde Park with an ice cream in hand. The sound of the tube coming to a stop at Euston. The cobbles at Covent Garden making her trip in converse. The masses of cooing and squabbling pigeons at Trafalgar.

“Yeah Lucca - Mr Borghese even- seemed to imply that when you were well enough, you’d be coming back home, to London.”

“Oh” Ester’s heart fell a little. Hurt bloomed in her chest, out shining all the clamour of pain beginning to wake up in her body. “So, you spoke to him, to Lucca?”

Why should she be surprised? He’d said she wasn’t safe around him, time and time again she’d either been told by others or time, and even felt it herself, that he wasn’t the right person for her to be near, not everything was as it seemed. Did he also see her as a threat to his Darkthroat community? Had he kissed her last night?

Why had he brought her here? Why not a real hospital, there he could wash his hands of her and be done with it.

Penny chuckled lightly “Uh-hu, drives a hard bargain I can tell you. But…“ She hesitated

“But?”

“But, he clearly cares about you, a lot” Penny grumbled.

Ester snorted. No, she thought, no he doesn’t. No if he’s trying to ship me off ASAP. Where was he? Why was he not here? Why, when she woke up, was it ever Emma that sat next to her?

Could Lucca be upset that he’d brought her to Darkthroat? Was it dangerous for them, her being here? Someone who could expose them, whatever they were?

“He does Ester” Penny replied to her doubtful snort.

But then she remembered those words again: “I want you more than anything I’ve ever f*****g wanted”

Ester and Penny spoke for an hour or two. Once or twice they receded into tears again, Penny reliving the sheer fear she’d felt for Ester, Ester feeling guilt for being so far away from her sister.

They spoke about Penny’s job, a guy she’d started seeing and Ester’s old hospital friends. By the time the call ended, Ester could feel the swell of pain in her leg, chest and abdomen. She lifted the covers for the first time and glimpsed bandaging and gauze beneath her gown.

She fell backwards and closed her eyes as the waves of nausea crashed against her.

Penny was right. She should go home. There was nothing for her here. The only reason she’d taken a job here was to find her mother, and she’d barely spared that a thought since she’d bumped into Lucca Borghese.

Maybe she didn’t need to find her. Maybe Penny was all that she needed.

And he’d made it clear nothing would happen between them, something her sister and Doctor Collins agreed was best. Regardless of him saying he wanted her, regardless of the times he’d kissed her, regardless of the fact he’d saved her life.

Why was her heart in the most pain at this moment in time? She felt pathetic. She’d never been thrown by a guy, a guy she’d known only weeks.

Emma came back in and reading the lines of agony of her face, pulled out a dose of morphine from the corner cabinet. When she poised the injection into the IV catheter, Ester’s eyes fluttered open.

“Why hasn’t he come?” she could feel the tears in her voice and throat. “Why hasn’t he come during the day?”

She frowned “He will, Ester, I promise”

Ester nodded. That would have to do for now. She wanted to get out of the bed that instant, walk to any car and drive to the airport. She wanted to be far away from this place, far away from him.

“Not as much as before Emma, please,” her voice wavered under the pain “I don’t want to lose any more time”.

Emma twisted her lips and then nodded, letting Ester watch as pushed down on the morphine, letting her determine the dosage.

* * *

Water. Everywhere. It bled under the door. I’d spurted through the seams of the windows. It slowly bloated the ceiling, bowing in the middle.

Ester sat up. Get out, now– her voice commanded. Ester nodded.

But, as she struggled to manoeuvre her body around, her body stiffened.

White plaster casts covered each limb.

The potbellied ceiling burst and water gushed through.

Ester began to sob.

Like deadweight, her limbs worked against her. Her heart began to thump against her chest. Desperation clawed at Ester’s neck.

The light from outside was smothered.

Ester turned to the window as something large run passed it, and then disappeared. The light came back at once.

Something was out there.

A lacework of cracks began to grow on the glass of each window pane.

The door groaned against the water pushing from the other side.

Ester thrashed her body forwards. Her rigid legs now hanging over the bed frame. Water up to her knees.

She went to stand. Slipped.

She was on the floor. Thrashing in the water. Why won’t her limbs work? What’s happening?

Water. Everywhere. It bled into Ester’s nose, into Ester’s mouth.

A scream tore through her throat but the sound was swallowed by the water.

The light swallowed up once more.

A figure loomed above her from the surface of the water.

“Ester,” the voice called. She stilled. Her heart jerked, and then, slowed.

Warmth wafted around her. Gooseflesh erupted. Heat.

“Ester”

Hands cupped her face gently. Her eyes moved beneath their delicate eyelids.

“Ester, wake up,” he commanded quietly.

She started, her eyes opening into his, “It was just a dream,” he murmured kindly.

His hands vanished and a cold compress was pressed to her forehead.

“Lucca,” she whispered. Her eyes refused to flicker away from his to address whether the room was being assaulted by water. It didn’t matter. Not at this moment. “You saved me,” her words were slurred with sleep.

A small smile touched his lips. He put the compress back into the icy water next to him. He then smoothed her hair back from her face.

“So warm,” she murmured, closing her eyes against his touch. “where have you been?” she asked quietly, trying and failing to keep any emotion from her words.

“I’m sorry Ester,” His hand stopped his rhythmic movements. “I struggle to see you like this.”

“But I’ve missed you,” her lip trembled.

“I’ll come tomorrow.”

“And what about the next day?” she tried to peel her eyes open and thought she spied a lopsided smile.

“And the next day,” he pledged, running a hand though his hair.

“Hair’s grown” she tried to reach out to touch it, but her arms were heavy and uncooperative. He lifted her hand, entwined it with his own, and ran their hands through the side of his hair. Then he placed their hands back on her bed. “I’ve been a little too busy to cut it, maybe you can do it for me when you’re well enough.”

She snorted, and tried to say: “you’re going to wish you never said that!”, but it came out as, “you ‘wishin you ‘nev said fat!”

Chucking, he released her hand and pinned a kiss to her forehead. Warmth explored from that patch of skin, and skittered down, all the way to her toes.

“I have no idea what that was, but I think you should sleep now, before you start speaking in tongues”

“Tomorrow” she mumbled.

“Yes, I’ll come tomorrow,” he promised. “Now sleep, or else!”

And as much as she didn’t want to leave him there, sleep had already tied down her limbs and closed her eyelids.