Méabh Orla O'Brien

Payback

We had no homework today. I decided to call John and Beau I wanted firstly to give them my news that I now knew my maker, and was now ashes blown on the winds. I also wanted to see if they knew anything about the Cullen's. With James dead they wanted to know if I would be on the move again. I told them I wouldn't for a while. John laughed at me, "got a new favourite pet?" He knows me too well. "As it happens, I have. But somethings have happened here. I think I might stick around for a bit.

I went on to explain about Bella. John growled down the phone at that. I explained what Victoria had said about wanting to kill Bella, and my assessment that I thought that Victoria would want the Cullen's in the area to witness what she'd done. I completed the call with a request to John. I wanted my samurai sword from my Chicago vault.

I'd bought the dvd box set of 'Buffy the Vampire Slayer' and sprawled on my couch, I started to watch. I'm not sure it's meant to be a comedy, but I laughed my socks off. Angel is fecking hot, even if he's neutered. It's a misnomer that we lose our souls in transformation. In fact our souls are what prevent us from going on a rampage and wiping out the entire human population. How people who work like me can have pets and not kill them.

I get to season two, ooh now Spike. 'I was a Woodstock. That was a weird gig.' Too funny. Now who's been telling tales? The Drusilla character is very familiar. John and I met her shortly after we left Alaska. Not just a sandwich short of a picnic, the whole hamper was missing. I'm looking forward to watching some more. 'From now on, we're gonna have a little less ritual... and a little more fun around here'. Love it.

Bella was waiting for me when I arrived at school. "You're? One of them?" I'm careful no flashy smiles, no eye contact. No contact of any kind. "I am. He left you?" She nodded sadly. "How long?" Barely above a whisper she said, "four months now." I gave a low whistle, even when I'd made mistakes with my pets it had only taken a few weeks thereabouts to recover. He must have been flooding her every second they were together.

"What happened," I asked quietly. "There was an incident on my birthday. A paper cut. One of them attacked me. I can't blame him really. I was clumsy. He's an empath. He had to deal with their blood lust as well as his own. But they left anyway, to protect me." I growled, "some protection." The warning bell rang. "We'll continue this later."

I hadn't even realised Bella had a study period with me. We hid at the back of the library. Sat on the floor using the stacks as back rests. "So how long were you together?" Her head was down her hair curtained her face. "Six months." Now I got why she's such a wreck. Do I tell her why? "Bella you're going through withdrawal. Not just heartbreak. But stronger than any known drug, withdrawal."

"He said I was his own brand of heroin!" She said still looking at the floor. "He was yours, only far more powerful. "He kept you pressed to him when you were together, I bet he sparkled for you too? Softened his voice and breathed over you? Please tell me he didn't say you were mates?" She nods, "he snuck into my room and laid with me every night. And you're right. He said we were mates." I just avoided growling. "Your hand. You were bitten. But you didn't turn?"

"Oh that was a disaster. We met some nomads, when we were playing baseball. One of them was a tracker. He hunted me then tricked me to meet him to save my mom. He didn't even have her. He beat me up first, broke my leg. Then he bit me. Edward sucked out the venom." I'd never heard of such a thing. There can't have been much venom in her system. My brain started to churn fast, "do you know his name?" There's a nod, "James!"

"I'm guessing one of the other nomads was Victoria?" She looked up startled at me. "How did you know?" I chuckled, "I had the pleasure of Victoria's company last weekend. As for James - the masochistic arse. He was my maker. He didn't put enough venom in me. I burned for five days and he didn't even wait for me to transition." She looked like she could cry, "are you saying James did the same to me, so I suffered longer than necessary if I changed?"

"Can't say for certain. But I wouldn't bet against it." I looked at her, "why did Edward remove the venom? Why didn't he let you transition?" Oh goodness I have made her cry. "He never wanted me to become one of you. He wanted me to grow old with him at my side." Another masochist. "Bella, is Edward the head of the coven. The sire to the others?" She shakes her head, "no. Carlisle made Edward, Esme, Rose and Emmett. Alice and Jasper came to live with them, but Carlisle didn't make them." I guess Alice and Jasper's sire must be related to Carlisle. "Alice and Jasper? Who made who?"

I'm stunned when she says, "neither. Alice found Jasper and brought him to live with them. They're not related." I couldn't decide whether I could be brutal to this broken human, but she needs to hear some truth. I soft-pedal a little. "I don't think he could be your mate. I haven't found mine yet. But my friend has, they can't survive long without the other." She shakes her head, "I'm not surviving!"

I suppressed another growl. "But he clearly is. He'd be back already if he were your mate. He'd be feeling your pain and couldn't stand to be away." I move away from Edward and his dreadful treatment of Bella. "Who actually killed James? Victoria said Edward did." Another head shake, "no it wasn't Edward. He was busy helping Carlisle save me. I'm not sure if it was Emmett or Jasper who finished him." I'm relieved I don't have to thank Edward, I'd like to kick his backside.

"It's just my opinion. But the best way to get back at Edward is to start trying to live again." I advised her. "I know. My dad is threatening to send me back to my mother in Phoenix. I need to pull myself together." The bell rings for lunch. "You said he sparkled for me. Does that mean he/you can control it?" Odd question, "yes we can control it. Except in the height of summer in really strong sun then it kind of leaks out." As I got to my feet. "I don't think any of them know that." Maybe Victoria wasn't far off the mark when she called them a joke.

By Friday lunch Bella had started to pull herself together. Queenie seemed to have forgiven her and actually invited Bella to the cinema. Bella turned to me, "you'll come too?" I shake my head. "I have plans this weekend." That reminds me I must pick up a present for Liam. I'll have to change things this weekend. I'll see him tonight but I won't feed. I can get his present on Saturday, then meet him again on Saturday night. Then I can feed then.

I got my usual at the bar. I could see my little pet waiting for me in a booth. He's straight into my side, and nuzzled my neck. I offered him a sip of my drink, "thank you." I don't want to keep him here long. I won't be able to resist feeding from him if I do. "Liam, my pet. I want you to go home now." He gasped, and whispered, "have I not been good?" I stroked his cheek, "you've been very good. I want to see you here tomorrow instead, my pet." I murmered into his ear. "I could stay tonight too?" I'm a bit sharp with him, "no. You're going to go home and have something healthy to eat. No more junk food, my pet." I could smell the grease and onions of McDonald's on him. I'm kinder to him, "I need you to look after yourself, my pet. You understand?" He nodded into my neck, "yes, miss. I will from now on."

I found someone to feed from, she had multiple scars on her wrist and clearly knew the game, but I check. "You're not someone's pet currently?" She shakes her head. "My mistress released me. But I enjoy it now and again, so I keep a look out for others that might have the same quirky tastes." I stroke her wrist, "little tip. You can use the same point repeatedly. Watch." She draped her arm across my face, her wrist near my mouth, ready. I opened an existing scar and drank until I felt her get light headed and stopped, and sealed the scar. "Thank you, can I get you anything?" As she looked up at me and shook her head, I could see her eyes shining. So she got a buzz from it?

Saturday night, I scan the booths for him. I couldn't see him. Then I did. He stumbled from the men's room holding his nose. Blood evident between his fingers. I just about managed not to growl as I got to him. "Come my pet. Let's get you out of here and cleaned up." I took him to my hotel. I sat him on the toilet with his head over the basin. "Stay here pet. I'm going to get some ice." I turned away from him and licked his blood from my fingers. What a fecking waste.

I got the ice and wrapped some in a flannel and held it on his forehead. "I'm sorry. I spoilt the night." I held in a growl. I didn't want my pet thinking I was angry at him. I murmered in his ear, "you didn't, my pet. But whoever hurt you might have to pay." I could smell his tears now. Yep someone is going to pay for this. "He told me to leave you alone," he mumbled. The blood had stopped flowing. I led him to the bed, "lay down pet. Get some rest. I'll be back soon."

I stormed back to the club. I prowled around I caught the scent of Liam's blood mingled with cigarettes, stale beer and b.o. Gotcha! He's dancing. Good. An accidentally well placed elbow to the face will do. I loved to dance. Normally as soon as my feet touched the dance floor nothing else mattered but the music. Not tonight. I waited for my moment, bang! My elbow connected with a satisfying crunch. I was nowhere near him the next moment.

I left immediately and went back to my hotel. Liam is asleep on the bed. I pulled the covers over him. I found some hotel stationary and a pen. I wrote him a note.

Liam, my pet.

I had to leave. I'll call you. Feel better soon.

Don't forget your presents.

B

I'd kept it simple with his presents. A leather thong bracelet with his name in beads on it, and a three pack of silk boxer shorts.

I took off running north, I bypassed Forks and crossed the water to Canada, I drifted west into Alaska. I took my anger out on a large bear. I don't normally play with my food. I filled myself eventually from it. I laid down and watched the stars. I was treated to a small aurora display. I'm trying to decide if I go home yet or to stay a little longer when on the wind I caught the most divine scent I'd ever smelled.

I jumped to my feet and turned around slowly trying to pick it up again. Nothing. I looked at the ground, and repositioned my self. The scent had come from the right. I walk slowly for hours hoping to find it again. Eventually I gave up, and growled hard. What a frustrating weekend.

I didn't see Bella until lunchtime. By then I had heard the gossip. Yes she'd gone to the cinema with the others. After the film she'd gone for a jaunt on the back of a complete stranger's motor bike. My goodness has the girl gone nuts?

The week passed and the weekend was calling. I was torn. I needed to feed from at least one pet. I also really wanted to go to Alaska and see if I could catch that scent again.