CHAPTER NINE
I keep a s****l diary. I started it during my year as Miss One World. There were times when we'd be traveling and there's nothing more boring than riding from, say, Japan to England on even the most luxurious jet. It's just long hours of doing nothing, so I started keeping the journal to pass the time. I'd stopped drinking by that time, finding that it added unwanted ounces, so I couldn't do the martini bit all the way across the oceans and the continents.
I began by trying to remember my early life. Went back to the days when I played with myself. Days when I lost my virginity, found the joy of s*x with Ruf, did the incest bit with poor old Ruby. Oh, incidentally, I sent Ruby a letter when I started getting my money from the films we did in Rome and told him that if he'd ta
