Chapter 2 A Royal Slap
1057 Words
"Ugh! Another mosquito on your face, Father! Disgusting bloodsucker!" Elvis scowled, raising both hands with theatrical flair.
"I... shall endure. Just reveal the formula already, boy."
"Then close your eyes, Father. I'll deliver it right into your hands." Elvis made a show of reaching into his robes.
After a moment's hesitation, Denny shut his eyes and braced himself. If this humiliation earns me that formula, so be it.
SMACK!
"What fresh torment is this? More insects?" the Emperor growled through gritted teeth.
"This subject merely found slapping amusing."
CLOP-CLOP-CLOP!
When Denny opened his eyes, the hall stood empty—no impudent son, no promised formula. From the corridor, a trembling eunuch heard the Emperor's roar: "Blast your formula! And blast your imaginary winter mosquitoes!"
{Congratulations, Host! Sweet revenge unlocked! Reward: One lottery spin. Activate?}
"Activate!" Elvis drooled over the dazzling prizes on the wheel. "Mmm... fried chicken? No, wait—soda! Ugh, but ice cream though... Would iced desserts in winter chill my bowels?"
{Congratulations! Prize: Ten pounds of potatoes.}
"Potatoes?! This is highway robbery! How does one even eat these?"
That evening, Elvis strode into Aurelia Palace clutching upgraded fireworks. Denny stood poking suspiciously at firecracker prototypes.
"Father! You must witness these fireworks!" Elvis called from the courtyard.
"You impudent brat! Where's my formula?!" The Emperor's robes billowed as he lunged outside, determined to corner him this time.
"I devoted myself to perfecting this, Father! Behold—" He struck a flint, igniting a fuse.
KABOOM! CRACKLE-SIZZLE!
The night detonated into daylight. Colored fire blossomed across the heavens, drowning out the moon's pale glow with their radiance.
"A...a divine omen!" Denny plopped onto the ground, the fireworks painting his face with childlike wonder.
"Well, Father? Impressed?" Elvis preened, rocking back on his heels.
"Heh heh...Cody boy, that fireworks recipe—" Rubbing his palms together with greedy anticipation, the emperor's eyes gleamed.
"Recipe? I promised you firecrackers, not fireworks." With an exaggerated flourish, Elvis tossed a scrap of parchment at him.
"Show's over, Father. Later!" Dusting off his sleeves with exaggerated care, the prince sprang up from the steps.
"Hold it! Name your price—your father makes it happen!" Denny's voice turned suspiciously sweet.
"Cards on the table. Fifty percent of the fireworks profits." Elvis shrugged, mouth twisting into a cocky smirk.
"You little highwayman!"
"Suit yourself. The firecracker recipe'll still line your pockets."
"Think you can outrun me?" In one swift motion, Denny snatched the remaining fireworks and bolted, chortling triumphantly.
"Go ahead—try reverse-engineering that. Hope you enjoy the bang!"
*SLAM* Barricaded in Aurelia Palace, Denny crouched beneath the imperial desk, examining his prize. "Pfft. Just fancy firecrackers." With a sharp *crack*, he wrenched the tube open—*FZZZT*—
"Since when do these things hiss?!"
*KABOOM!*
Incandescent powder plastered the emperor from head to toe, his dragon robes now a gaudy mess of red and gold. "BLAST THAT BOY!"
"Your Majesty!" A voice echoed outside. "The Imperial Astronomers report celestial signs over the palace—"
"Divine portents be damned! SCRAM!"
{Congratulations Host! Gained: Legendary Beast Tamer abilities.}
Elvis froze mid-stride at the distant explosion. "*Gulp.* Better make myself scarce." He broke into a sprint.
Before reaching Empress Vallier's Serenity Palace, an enraged bellow chased him: "YOU IMPISH BRAT—STOP RIGHT THERE!"
Elvis spun around to see a ragged figure with a glowing red face barreling toward him. He nearly jumped out of his skin and bolted like a startled hare.
"Guards! Assassin!" he bellowed at the top of his lungs.
Palace sentries came running at the alarm, only to skid to a halt at the bizarre spectacle.
"Alert! An intruder's loose in the palace!"
"Summon Master Nikos! He knows how to handle supernatural threats!"
Denny was thoroughly enjoying the pursuit when—whoosh!—a massive net came billowing down. Drawing on his battlefield reflexes, he narrowly dodged it.
"Blast it! If they catch me like this, I'll be the court jester of Aeloria by dawn!"
Panicking, he ducked into the nearest hiding spot.
"Search every corner! Leave no stone unturned!"
Years later, Elvis would recall how the guards turned the palace upside down until daybreak.
He also remembered his father's thunderous rage the next morning, when every searching guard received twenty lashes.
The following dawn, still rattled from the night's excitement, Elvis resolved to craft proper self-defense weaponry.
After dismissing his attendants, he crouched on the floor, completely engrossed in his tinkering—utterly unaware of the eyes watching from above.
"Now... five qian of saltpeter, three of sulfur, and a pinch of charcoal. Perfect!"
He aimed his rocket-shaped device ceilingward and touched the fuse with a lit tinderstick.
FSSSS—BOOM!
The projectile screamed upward before detonating with an earth-shaking kaboom—followed by a most un-imperial yelp.
Denny came crashing through the roof tiles.
"Well well, Father. Sunbathing on my roof, were we?" Elvis quipped, raising an eyebrow.
"Why yes! The sunlight here is simply divine. Ahhh, absolutely revitalizing!" Denny stretched exaggeratedly, dusting off his robes.
"Let's be frank, Father. I'll give you the fireworks formula—for half the profits."
"You crafty little devil! Handing me some hastily scribbled notes and demanding half my earnings?"
Elvis smirked. "Take it or leave it!"
"Fine, might as well take it—hand over that formula!" He snatched the recipe and stuffed it into his sleeve like a thief guarding his loot.
"Daddy, hug!" Elvis said in a baby voice.
"Good child." Denny couldn't stay mad at him and reached out for an embrace—completely missing the imperial token vanishing from his belt.
"Elvis, you mustn't make your father worry so much," Denny said earnestly.
"You're right, Daddy! But you promised to be my horsie!"
"Alright, you little rascal." The emperor crouched down.
"Yay! Giddy-up, horsie!"
Hearing the cheerful shouts behind him, Denny thought having this son wasn't so bad.
"Giddy-up!" As Denny walked forward carrying Elvis, something warm dripped onto his head. He tasted something salty.
"Oops! Gotta run, Daddy!" Elvis jumped down and bolted, looking back as he ran.
Denny wasn't angry—with the fireworks formula secured, how could he be?
The emperor walked off happily with his prize.
Meanwhile, Elvis swaggered toward the Imperial Stud Office, eager to test his new Top Beastmaster skills. The boy swayed with exaggerated steps, hands swinging freely.
- Writer
