I didn't know I was a wolf

Chapter 4

Back in her office she shut her down and just crawled under her desk panting. She felt like she was going to crawl out of her own skin. Everything felt itchy, she felt both hot and cold at the same time, she could not breathe. ‘This is a panic attack. That’s all, let’s breathe. Focus. What can I see, what can I touch, what can I smell..’

It was slowly working. Her breathing was getting better but that feeling in her skin was not going away. Focus on your breathing. ‘maybe I should check myself in to the mental hospital. I don’t think I am making rational choices anymore’. She looked at the time horrified, she looked at her phone and all 5 missed calls and so many messages from Justin. “How long was I out there for?!” She called Justin before he called all the cops in the area to look for her

“Hi babe! I am so sorry! I think I fell asleep at my desk!” more lies.

“I was so worried about you! I thought you were dead. What do you mean you fell asleep? Where are you?”

“I know, I know I am so sorry, I am in my office, I will be home in 10 minutes. I am so sorry I worried you! I don’t know what happened” At least that was true.

She ran to her car and drove home. As she pushed open the door, there was Justin “There you are! Jesus Sam, I was f**k*ng worried… wait, why are you in workout clothes? Is this the real reason you are late? You went for a f*****g run and you forgot your phone. Again? Seriously Sam!”

Busted.

“No! Justin, you have to believe me. Yes I went for a run, but then I forgot to change back to my clothes. I swear I have not been running for 5 hours. Can you imagine how hungry and thirsty I would be if I had been running for 5 hours? You can check my Strava if you don’t believe me, but is this really what it’s come down to?” Good job Sam, emotional blackmail. Is this what your marriage has come to?

“Well, that’s just it Sam. I did check your Strava. I was about to go out there when I noticed you had been there for 3 hours, not moving. What the hell were you doing?”

‘I was out there for three hours?’ she though.

“There must have been a glitch in the system. I went out and came right back. It was only a six mile run Justin! I’m not THAT slow” she gave a small laugh trying to diffuse the situation. “Anyway, I am home now, and it’s Friday, we have both had long weeks, lets go out. We’ll make a spontaneous date out of it! Maybe we could catch a show, there’s that new superhero movie you wanted to see right?”

I moved in to hug him “I’m sorry I worried you”, I kissed his neck, I suddenly felt nauseous. “Let’s go have fun.”

“ok,” he said kissing me on the cheek, more nausea “go get dressed.”

Samantha was not quite sure what the night would end up like so she got dressed in her nice pair of jeans and a fancy top that exposed a little more of her cleavage than she normally would. Some fancy jewelry, make-up and ta-da! Date night ready! And yet… the thought of going on a date with Justin made her skin crawl. She loved Justin, but all she wanted to do was go back to the woods to look for that freaking wolf. ‘Ok, on Monday, first things first, I am going to look for a good therapist’. She thought.

When she went back downstairs Justin was on the couch waiting for her reading his book. His floppy brown hair pushed back, his grey eyes focused. ‘He’s as handsome as he was the day we met in grad school’ she thought, no nausea, so that’s something.

“I’m ready! Let’s go!”, he looked up and let out a long whistle “well you look amazing” he said appreciatively.

“Flattery will get you everywhere sir” she responded and gave him a quick peck, more nausea.

They had an amazing dinner at a good restaurant. Conversation was easy the way it has always been. Samantha is always surprised at how much fun she has with Justin. He is extraordinary in everything he does, and truth be told she has never been quite sure what he saw in her. She is a strongly average person. Average student, average athlete, average at most things she does. Justin is not, he is one of those annoying people who is generally great at everything he even tries. But they get along, he makes her laugh, they love each other’s company. After dinner they are not quite ready for the night to end so they go to their favourite bar. It is a small walk from the restaurant and unlike the clubs they used to frequent in their youth this place has dancing without the music being overwhelming for conversation, fancy drinks without costing a mortgage payment, and a relaxed easygoing atmosphere with tables scattered throughout.

They are enjoying the music and the drinks when Samantha feels eyes on her. She can’t shake the feeling of them. She tries to discreetly look around and there she sees them. A pair of familiar green eyes. They’re on the most gorgeous man she has ever laid her eyes on. Midnight black hair with striking green eyes, tall, and fit. His movements rippled the muscles under his shirt. She could not stop staring, transfixed by his eyes. They looked like the wolf’s eyes. She was losing her mind.

“Who is that? Do you know him? Should I go beat him up for you?” Justin asked teasingly

“No I have no idea who he is, he looks familiar, but I cannot place him” she answered, not quite a lie.

He started walking this way, her blood was singing the closer he got, she was breathing like she’d be running, she was trying to hide that though.

“Dr. Klein, what a pleasure to meet you, I have heard many of your talks” the gorgeous man said, her body was reacting on overdrive, all of her senses were going crazy, does he smell like pine trees? “My name is David Foster.”

I have never seen this man in my life and I know for a fact he has never heard me speak. He is lying. Why is why lying? Why do I want to jump in his arms and never turn back, my husband is literally right here. Why can I not form coherent thoughts anymore. Justin is looking at me waiting to say something. My mouth cannot work. He takes over and is making pleasant small talk with the man, David. His name is David.

David talks to Justin pleasantly enough, but something about his demeanor makes me think he does not like him, He sneaks glances at me. I still cannot stop staring. I have an irrational need to bury my head in him to smell him, the way I did with the damned wolf. Oh God, what is wrong with me? I excuse myself and run to the bathroom. Once there I pace, and then take an emergency exit. Fresh air. That is all I need, fresh air.