Loving a bully billionaire part 4!

Chapter 148

Mia’s Pov

I stand up from the bed, took the sheets with me and walked to the bathroom.

“What a f**k are you doing Mia?” Griffin asked walking behind me. I kept quiet. I don’t know what I’m doing. Of course, I missed him and love him. I just can’t say it to him.

“Mia?”

“What Griffin? What?” He glares at me like I just punched him in the stomach.

“I asked, what are you doing? Do you want to hurt me?” I started laughing, and this time out of anger.

“Hurt you? You know what? f**k you.” I splashed my face with water and soaked my hair from all the heat I just felt minutes ago.

“You will never forgive me, will you?” He stands against the wall, staring at me like a lost puppy being abandoned.

“What do you want me to say? That I’ve missed you? Because I did, I couldn’t f*****g breathe for years. Do you want to hear that I love you? You know I do. I just can’t say it to someone who crushed me every time I thought you changed. How many times do you think I can take another swing? Tell me?” He kept staring.

“Yeah, I thought so.” I dressed in my black dress again and walked out of the hotel room. Now I really feel like a w***e.

I walked out of the hotel, my face red from crying and my makeup smashed underneath my eyes.

I can’t go home. I can’t get into a fight with Griffin again, and I just sabotage the one change to make Rosie happy.

I looked at the clock. It was 11 PM. Rosie should be sleeping by now.

I decided to drive to Dawn instead of home. I can’t deal with the burst outs, at least not tonight.

I stopped in front of Dawn’s apartment and prayed Rosie didn’t decide to stay up late.

I breathed in and out and walked up the stairs. Griffin’s face of disappointment or pain is haunting me when I walked out on him.

“What are you doing here?” Dawn asked when I banged on the door.

“I f****d up the entire night,” I answered with my shoes in my hand.

“Come inside, it’s cold.” Dawn took my shoes, grabbed a blanket from the chair to throw over my shoulders.

“You want some coffee?” I nodded and search the apartment with my eyes.

“She’s asleep, don’t worry.” Dawn picked up with my vibe, hoping that Rosie is sleeping.

“What happened?” she asked, giving me coffee. I took a few sips before I told her exactly how I messed up the entire night.

“Do you still love him?” she asked with concern.

“I do. I just don’t know if I can trust him again, or live in fear of his past.”

I stare at the portrait against the wall.

It was the day we had fun at the beach. Griffin just received the medal of the best business owner of the year.

I missed those days. I was happy. Even though I knew we were always in danger or something might drop out of the closet, I still didn’t care. I only cared about us.

“What do you want to do, Mia?” Dawn asked. No, actually, she’s telling me to follow my heart.

“I love him. I love him so much that it actually scares me. The future with him is always a mystery. What if something happens again? I can’t go through that pain again Dawn, I just can’t,” I started crying again.

“Maybe just give it a try, Mia. He loves you, and I’ve never seen you love anyone the way you loved him, and still do.” I know she says it to make me feel better, and yes, she is right, but the moment I get too close, he sabotages everything. I give it all. It’s always beautiful, and he messes everything up, and then I’m too far deep into helping him, that I’m actually drowning with no one to pull me up.

We’ve been through so much that I don’t know how to go back to being normal again.

How do you forget 7years of pain and hate and missing someone so much that it changed you as a person?

Dawn keeps quiet for a while. I know I will get a Dr Phil out of her now.

“Mia.” she half-whispered, and there it is. I took a massive sip of my coffee.

“I know what he did was wrong, he went off the wagon, ok not the wagon, he went off a f*****g cliff, but he did all this to protect his family, and I know it can’t justify the pain you had to feel for 7years, but try. Take it slow. I know you want to, otherwise, you would’ve never gone to the restaurant last night.” I want to tell her she’s better than Dr Phil, but despite that, she is right.

I still get butterflies if he stares at me, and the electricity filling my body when he touches me is exploding every time.

“Do you think this time it would be different?” She lowered her head in disbelieve, but I know she wants to believe it. Especially for Rosie.

“I don’t know Mia, all I know is that both of you love each other, that even if you want to move on, you won’t be able. You’ve grieved him for too long, and now he’s back. I can’t tell you what to do, but I can tell you that little girl in the room needs both of you.”

I smiled when she mentioned Rosie. I saw how her face lids up when both Griffin and I were in a room together. It’s like she has the family she always dreamed of.

“I guess I should go and look for him?” Dawn smiled and nodded in repeat. I sigh, hoping that if I go home now that he would be in a better mood. Well, I guess it would piss any man off.

“Go, Rosie can stay here tonight.” Dawn gave me a hug and handed me my shoes to go and look for Griffin. I hope he’s at home?

I drove with my mind, rethinking this entire thing.

I want him; I want him so badly, but it scares me so much that it makes me stop breathing.

The moment I get sucked into our lives, a bomb drops on us.