where the light failed

slap

" You're sorry ? For what ?Lying ? Where did you go ?"

" I took a stroll”

" You're still lying ? Ally I'm gonna hit you if you don't say the truth. "

Mom points her finger at me shooting daggers at me. My eyes meet Layla’s She barely helps matters. She actually enjoys my torture. I look back at my parents, their eyes not leaving my figure. And I just snap. They don't get to be bitchy to me all the time.

" Really ? It has always been about you guys. You don't even care about me. You started being nice to me when I chose to join the choir, nobody cares about my feelings. Your pressures made me choose to join the choir, because why ? You wanted to boost your ego."

And that's it. My mom slapped me. I looked at her but didn't stop.

“ All my life I wanted just one thing and that was for you guys to love me but no you never did. I joined the choir to gain a little bit of your love. I was drugged, my nude was sent out, instead of my parents to believe and fight for me, you keep tormenting me and guess what, I almost died today because of you all. You keep reminding me of things I want to forget, instead of helping me heal, you keep expanding my wound. when I ran out of the house this morning, I didn't know where I found myself and was almost killed. And I fought, survived and found my way home and I came to this? guess you would have been happy if I had died.”

My mom slapped me again.

“Yea keep on slapping me.thats all you know how to do anyways, if you are not slapping me, you are hurting me with your words. Go on slap me again or hit me."

My mom just stood there staring at me without saying a word I looked at her again with tears streaming down my face,I wipe my tears and turn to walk to my room.

" Ally come back here"

Dad called after me. I ignored them and stormed into my room. I locked the door and fell on my bed crying nonstop. I hated my life, why can't I be like Layla? They don't yell at Layla and mom will never raise her hand to hit Layla. My head starts to pound. I stand up and reach for my bottle water and pills. I can't wait to stop taking pills. I know for a fact that my parents are not going to pay for my pills again. Swallowing the pills, I look at my face in my mirror. My reflection stared back at me. I look broken. Even if I never had the perfect life , it was ok before Axel took advantage of me. I blink my eyes and undress myself to have a warm bath. I stay inside the bathtub thinking about college. I can't wait to get out of here and go to college , What is it gonna be like? will my parents still want to pay my tuition after today? Today is the first time I'll talk back at my parents. I've never been that kind of girl. Even in high school I was always bullied and never once fought back. But I guess I need to start standing up for myself now, I will not allow myself to be bullied in college. Layla is like a lucky star, everybody likes her and sometimes I'm jealous. My mind drift to that weird tattooed stranger. He made me forget about my pain at least for the few minutes we drove in the same car. It's fruitless thinking about him though.we're never gonna see again. I finally decided to come out of the bathroom after a very long time. And I saw my phone ringing and it's a private number I picked it up and pressed the phone on my ear.

" Ally” The voice made me freeze at once. Why's he calling me ? I blocked his number. What does he want from me ? To hurt me again ?

" Axel. what do you want ?" I asked

" Ally, I'm sorry,I didn't mean to hurt you. I want you. I've always liked you.”

" What do you want ?" I yell

" I want you Ally"

“ You have no idea how much I hate you right now, how dare you tell me you like me after everything you put me through? I don't ever want to see or hear from you again. Don't ever call me again, I will never want a monster like you. So just leave me alone. "

I sniffle wiping my tears.

" Ally”

“ Go to hell Axel You'll burn"

I said and hung up throwing my phone on my bed with myself. How dare he call me?. I stayed till almost midnight and nobody called me for dinner. I guess they are planning on cutting me off from the family tree already. I lay on my bed and go through the pages of the book the therapist gave me. For some silly reasons, I keep on remembering that weirdo stranger.I toss my book aside and close my eyes to sleep.

I woke up the next morning and decide to just lie down on my bed, I don't want to see anyone in this house right now at the same time I'm thinking about my life and how boring it is, I can't keep doing this or I'm just gonna die of depression, since there's not much to do here. I should probably get a job but knowing my parents they're not gonna agree to it. I'll just have to wait till I start college and look for a job.

“Ally” I heard someone calling and knocking on my door.

“Ally” she calls again, knocking endlessly . I rolled my eyes and dragged my lazy self out of the bed and opened the door to see Kelly. Kelly's my cousin whose dad is my uncle and the only one who my mom listens to, he is her older brother who has always been nice to me. Anytime he discovers my parents are maltreating me, he always comes to warn them. Most times I hear him arguing with my mom and their attitude will change for a few days after that but once the dust settles and they notice he's no longer looking they start again. There was a time they had a big quarrel and he took me to his house to stay my mom had to come and beg him to let me come back home that and she promise to behave and treat me well that was around the time I started my trial for choir and I really thought they had changed until the issue with Axel. I know for a fact that if he knows that I've been depressed for a while now and that my parents were the major cause of it, He might come fight my parents. I always try to pretend to be okay anytime he or Kelly my cousin is around because I don't want them to fight with my parents, hoping they'll actually grow to love me, but at this point I give up I know they are not going to change. Kelly is also one of those people who has always been there for me she is like the big sister Layla should have been, we went to the same high school she was my senior but she always stands up from me anytime I'm being bullied. she likes boys, dresses fancy and she's close to Layla in fact Layla sees her as her role model, you would catch her secretly stalking her social media account, sometimes she even tries to walk like her.