CHOSEN. EVERY DAY

Chapter 2: Five Years Later

The house was the same.

That was the first thing I noticed.

The same marble floors. The same chandelier. The same smell of wood and lemon and money.

It was also completely different.

There were new photos on the wall. The twins were taller in them. There was a dog bed by the fireplace. The kitchen had new countertops.

Five years.

Five years since I left with one suitcase and a broken heart.

Five years since Damian told me to go and never come back.

Five years since I last held Lily and Leo.

My phone buzzed. My sister.

You okay. Text me when you are inside.

I will, I typed back.

The front door opened.

Mrs Delgado.

She looked older. More gray. More lines. But her eyes were still soft.

Miss Carter, she said.

Hello Mrs Delgado, I said.

What are you doing here, she asked.

Mr Cole called me, I said. He said he needed a nanny. He said the twins were struggling.

She frowned. He called you.

Yes, I said. I showed her my phone. Last Tuesday. From this number.

She stepped back. Come in. It is cold.

I dragged my suitcase in. My hands would not stop shaking.

He did not tell us, she said. He just told me to prepare the nanny room.

My stomach dropped.

He told me the kids need me, I said.

Mrs Delgado looked at me. Come to the kitchen. I will make tea.

We walked down the hallway. Everything was the same. And nothing was.

Where are they, I asked.

Upstairs, she said. In the playroom.

Can I see them.

Mr Cole is in a meeting, she said. He said you should wait.

He is here, I said.

Yes, she said.

My heart started racing.

The kitchen door opened.

Damian.

He was older. Of course. Five years older. More gray. More tired. But still tall. Still Damian.

His eyes found me and stopped.

Elena, he said.

Damian, I said.

What are you doing here, he asked.

You called me, I said. I took out my phone. You said please come back.

He looked at the screen. His jaw tightened.

I did not call you, he said.

The room went quiet.

What, I whispered.

I did not call you Elena, he said. It was not me.

Then who did, I asked.

I do not know, he said.

Mrs Delgado left quickly.

Now it was just us.

You are lying, I said.

Why would I lie, he said.

Because you are the only one who has this number, I said. Because the twins need me.

The twins are fine, he said.

They are not fine, I said. My voice broke. Mrs Delgado said Lily asks about me.

Damian ran a hand through his hair. He looked exhausted.

Listen, he said. I do not know who called you. Maybe it was a mistake. But you cannot stay here.

Cannot stay, I repeated. I just flew six hours. I quit my job.

That is not my problem, he said.

The words cut.

Before I could answer we heard running.

Mommy Elena.

Lily.

She crashed into me. Her arms around my waist. Her face in my coat.

I froze. Then I hugged her back.

Oh baby, I whispered. You are so big.

You came back, she said. Like it was a miracle.

I did, I said. I touched her hair.

Daddy said we were getting a new nanny, she said. He said maybe it could be you.

Lily, Damian said. Warning.

What, she said. You said that.

Damian closed his eyes.

Leo was in the doorway. Taller. Quieter.

Is she staying, he asked.

Damian looked at me. Then sighed.

For now, he said. Until we figure out who called you. You can stay in the nanny quarters.

Thank you, I whispered.

Do not thank me yet, he said. There are rules.

I nodded.

One. This is professional. Two. You do not come to my part of the house unless I call you. Three. We do not talk about the past.

Understood, I said.

Good, he said. Dinner is at seven.

He walked out.

Lily grabbed my hand. Come see my room.

Her room was full. Books. Drawings. A bike in the corner.

Your room is still the same, she said. Mrs Delgado cleans it every week.

Why, I asked.

Because Daddy said to, she said.

My chest hurt.

Dinner was quiet. Damian at one end. Me at the other. The twins in the middle talking nonstop.

Damian barely spoke. He ate and answered questions and looked at me like I was a stranger.

After dinner I bathed them. I read to them. I tucked them in.

Lily held my hand. Are you going to leave again.

No baby, I said. Not this time.

Promise.

Promise.

I sat with them until they slept. Then I went to my room.

It was exactly the same. Same bed. Same window. Same view of the garden covered in snow.

I cried.

The next morning I made pancakes. Damian came down in a suit.

You did not have to do that, he said.

I know, I said.

He sat. The twins talked. He nodded and drank coffee.

Before he left he stopped at the door.

Be in my office at nine, he said.

Yes sir.

Do not call me that, he said.

What should I call you.

Damian, he said. Just Damian.

At nine I knocked.

Come in.

He was behind his desk. Papers everywhere.

Sit, he said.

I sat.

I had my lawyer check the call, he said. Someone used a spoofing app. Made it look like my number.

Oh, I said.

So you see, he said. It was not me.

I know, I said.

Good, he said. Now. Your duties. School at eight. Pick up at three. Homework. Dinner at seven. Bed at nine.

Okay.

And Elena, he said. Finally looking at me.

Yes.

Do not make this hard, he said.

I am not trying to, I said.

Then do not look at me like that, he said.

Like what.

Like you used to, he said quietly.

My throat closed.

I will be professional, I said.

He nodded.

The next two weeks were routine. Mornings were chaos. Afternoons were homework and baking. Nights were stories.

Damian and I barely spoke. Just about the kids.

But sometimes at night I would see him in the kitchen. And he would pour two cups of coffee.

We would sit in silence.

Three weeks in there was a storm. Power went out.

The twins were scared. We all ended up by the fireplace with blankets.

Damian came in with candles. He sat on the other side of Leo.

We did not talk. The twins fell asleep between us.

In the quiet, Damian turned to me.

Why did you come back so fast, he whispered.

Because you asked me to, I whispered.

I did not, he said.

I know, I said. But part of me hoped it was you.

He closed his eyes.

You should not have hoped that, he said.

Why not.

Because I am still broken, he said. Because I cannot give you what you deserve. Because I am forty years older than you.

Age did not matter then, I said.

It matters now, he said.

Lily stirred.

Daddy, she mumbled. Is it morning.

Not yet baby, Damian said softly. Go back to sleep.

He looked at me.

Get some sleep Elena.

I nodded. But I did not sleep.

The next morning there was a letter.

For you, Mrs Delgado said.

It was from the nanny agency.

We regret to inform you that the position at the Cole residence was filled internally.

My hands shook.

Someone lied to me. Someone wanted me here.

That night at dinner Damian looked at me.

Did you get the letter.

Yes.

Then you know, he said. You should leave.

Leave, I said. Again.

I do not want you to get hurt, he said.

I am already hurt, I said.

He looked away.

Daddy, Lily said. Please do not make her go.

Lily, Damian said.

Please, she said. We like her.

Damian closed his eyes.

We will talk about this later, he said.

After bedtime he called me to his office.

Pack your things, he said.

My heart broke.

Damian please.

I cannot do this, he said. Having you here. Pretending.

Then do not pretend, I said.

He laughed. Bitter.

You do not understand, he said.

Then make me understand.

He walked to the window.

Five years ago I told you to leave because I thought it was right, he said. Because I was grieving. Because you were young. Because I did not want to ruin you.

And now, I asked.

And now I am still grieving, he said. And you are still young. And I still do not want to ruin you.

Damian.

But I missed you, he said. The words hurt him. Every day for five years I missed you.

I started crying.

Come here, he said.

I went to him. He pulled me into his arms.

I am sorry, he whispered. I am so sorry.

For what.

For everything.

We stood like that.

Finally he pulled back.

Stay, he said.

What.

Stay, he said again. Not as the nanny. Stay as you.

Damian.

I do not know what this is, he said. I do not know if it works. But I know I do not want you to go.

Are you sure.

No, he said. But I am sure I do not want to lose you again.

I nodded.

Okay, I whispered.

He smiled. The first real smile in five years.

Good, he said. Now go to bed. We will figure this out tomorrow.

I nodded and left.

In my room my phone buzzed.

Unknown number.

You should not have come back. You do not belong here.

My blood went cold.

Chapter 2 End