The Taste Of Restraint
1048 Words
Antonio froze at those words, his eyes darkened as he watched me reach toward his bulge.
The thought of pleasuring him, overshadowed everything else; my fear, my reasoning– I was only left with want.
My hand hovered over his bulge; I was about to touch it.
"Careful, Fiore", his voice came sudden making my hand freeze.
"Once you feed the fire, you may get burnt by it", he murmured.
My hand was still inches away from his member. I took a quick glance at him and found him watching me back.
There wasn't the slightest indication that he wasn't interested.
But yet he stopped me–why?
"Why?" I asked, my voice was raised and cracked from how oddly frustrated I felt.
He chuckled.
"I've told you, Fiore. I won't repeat myself again", he said, holding my neck.
I swallowed hard beneath his grip, my eyes never leaving his.
"You don't know how to please a man. You wouldn't even last with me", his lips twitched into a mocking smirk before he let me go.
His words cut deeper than a knife could. Anger blurred my vision as tears welled.
I felt my cheeks flush with shame as I looked away.
My gaze burned into the bed beneath me, my hands balling into fists with the sheets squeezed in them.
His weight shifted off the bed and i knew Antonio got up from the bed, without saying a word.
His footsteps filled the room briefly, then receded with the click of the door.
The tears I had been blinking back flowed freely, blinding my vision.
My chest felt tight and hollow at the same time. My hand clamped around my mouth trying to shut my sobs back in.
Like they didn't exist, like I wasn't crying over... HIM.
My mind glazed over how his last words, how he left like I was nothing, how my body reacted like it was normal, like it was meant to be.
And.. something in me broke, it felt like a surge of raw rage flowed through my veins.
I grabbed the pillow on the bed and hurled it at the glass vase on the table, I watched it fall to the floor with a loud crash, its pieces scattered across the floor.
My hands shook but it didn't feel enough.
I walked to my vanity, I looked at my reflection for a split second noticing the light bite mark on my shoulder, it glared back at me like a mark of shame.
A part of me broke, I snatched a figurine from my dresser and I chucked it at the mirror.
It shattered into a million shards.
I sank to my knees releasing a bloodcurling scream from my throat.
I curled my knees to my chest amid the wreckage, hands tangling in my hair. My chest heaving with sobs that I couldn't control anymore.
I hated him!
I hated myself, too.
The anger dissipated, leaving behind emptiness.
My body felt heavy and I felt drained like there was no fight left in me.
I stood up from the floor, my legs quaking beneath me and I climbed onto the bed.
My head throbbed.
My throat felt dry and sore.
Suddenly, the patter of rain drops against the roof disrupted the quiet of the room.
It felt good.
I loved the rain; it gave me a sense of hope, a sense of renewed energy.
But now, it just gave me one thing I craved—
Comfort.
I wrapped myself in the duvet, watching as the rain drops rolled down my bedroom window.
It was peaceful.
For the first time, since I'd been brought here, sleep took me without any notice.
***
The sound of hushed whispers filled the room. My eyes flew open and I was met by the maids.
They cleaned up the broken glass while speaking in hushed tones.
I glared at them.
I was in no mood to listen to them or tolerate them.
I hated this place.
I hated them.
More importantly, I hated him.
However, the only way out of here was through the careless talks of the stupid maids.
Despite the fact that I hated it, I still needed them to generate a plan and get out of here for good.
"What day is it?", I asked suddenly.
They froze and turned to me at once, surprised that I was awake.
"Um it's the 17th of November", Bianca answered quietly.
I nodded slowly, my mind drifting elsewhere...
I worked at Paradise in July, it'd been months since I left the outside world without a trace.
My heart ached at the distant memory of Andrea, she spoke about a black Friday Tradition, her birthday plans.
The plans she'd made for my birthday in December. I remembered her soft laughter when I had asked about cake and booze.
I wonder what she'd be doing now, the memories made my heart heavier by the minute.
It reminded me of the life I'd lost— the life I was supposed to have and the freedom I would claw back, no matter what.
"Miss", Ella's voice rang timidly.
I turned my head to her direction without uttering a word.
She gestured towards the bathroom, telling me about my bath.
I plastered a smile across my face and nodded.
I sprang up from the bed and bolted to the bathroom while holding Ella's hand.
My bath was quick as the rain was still falling and I would catch a cold if I stayed in too long.
Maria dressed me up in a hoodie and sweatpants, I refused to get my hair styled today as I complained of a headache.
Bianca set my breakfast in front of me, along with a glass of water and some painkillers.
"Thanks", I muttered.
"Miss, do you—?", Maria's voice came.
I held out my hand to stop her.
I was in no mood for chatter.
"Leave", I said, my tone was sharp.
They hesitated for a moment then left.
I heaved a sigh of relief, closing my eyes, still enjoying the sounds of the rain.
My bedroom door whipped open, I turned my head lazily toward the sound.
It was Antonio, of course.
His expression was neutral.
"What do you want?", I spat out venemously.
- Writer
