Scarred Roses

Chapter 9 part 1-pleasant surprises

It was Monday again. Ode to Mondays, the day where everything rewinds, and we’re back to the same, mundane routine. Or in my case, the day on which I was going to have to face everybody and examine the damage Nick had done to those girl’s self-esteem. It was also the day applicants were supposed to hear back from Green Thumb about volunteer work; Marlon, myself, and many others being the main candidates. This would be interesting, to say the least. But I was determined not to let it get to me. I was the first day I was able to go back to school after my week-long sentence to bed-rest. Time to see if anything mildly interesting had changed since my absence-perhaps we now had a scandal on meat-content in the takeaway nachos-or lack of, knowing Derby High.

After taking my turn in the bathroom, I retreated back to my room to get ready for the day. Leaving the sweater-vest on my bed, I took one of Audrey’s blouses and just wore that, with a school cardigan. I knew it was going to be warm today; the weather forecast spoke of a warm, spring day, and the sun was out already. Just a few, stray puffs of white dotting the blue, blue sky. That being said, I think I was going to take a break from swimming for a few weeks-more for mum’s sake than for mine. Just enough time, dad said, for her to no longer be convinced that swimming pools were tabooed. My mother was usually quite a smart woman, but when it came to superstitions, she was always cautious. There were enough surrounding this family already, we didn’t need any more.

After I was dressed, and my bag packed, I marched downstairs to join everyone for breakfast. Dad was going over our farm log-book, as per usual, mum was pouring herself a cup of coffee, and Nick was devouring a plate of buttered toast and poached eggs. Audrey, however, was nowhere to be seen. She was at a party Saturday night, and didn’t look so good the following Sunday. But hangovers had usually worn off by now! What could it be?

“Where’s Audrey?” I asked, pouring myself some juice.

“She hasn’t left her room yet, love.” Dad replied, not looking up from the log-book once. “I tried to get her out, but she just growled for me to ‘shut up’ and said nothing more. Maybe she’s sick?”

“If she’s sick, then she needs to phone Kicks and tell them herself.” Mum added, sitting down with her steaming, red-striped mug. “I’m not making an excuse for her if she’s gone and drunk too much.”

“I’m sure there’s an explanation.” Dad said to her soothingly, “Hazel, would you mind bringing her some toast? If there’s anyone she won’t be grumpy at, it’ll be you.”

“Of course,” I answered, already loading a plate full of toast, smothered in boysenberry jam. “She’ll want tea too, I imagine.”

“That’ll do her good, if she’s sick.” Mum concurred, helping me to assemble the cup with a plateful of food already in hand. “You’re an angel, darling. And if she is calling in sick, do let me know.”

I took Audrey’s kitten-mug, now filled with sweetened, milky tea-just the way she liked it. With the plate of toast balanced in the other hand, I made my way back upstairs, steadily approaching the door to my sister’s bedroom. Eye-level with myself, was an embroidered sign that hung, slightly crooked. In violet, loopy lettering, spelt ‘Audrey’s room-please knock’, with little pansies and a pair of bluebirds stitched in around it. It was just above the beautiful sign, I knocked three times. Resulting in a low, long groan from the other side.

“Audrey, it’s just me.” I said, “I’ve got some breakfast.”

“I don’t want it!” She growled back, “Now please, leave me alone.”

“Audrey, if you’re sick, you’ve got to eat something!” I reminded her, “Even if you feel like throwing up, better to have something in your stomach beforehand.”

“I said, I don’t want it!” She snapped, “Take it back.”

There was no helping her, I decided. Not while she was in such a mood. Perhaps mum might have some luck, later on.

I turned on my heel, intent on getting back downstairs to make some breakfast for myself. Vegemite on toast, and more orange juice did sound tempting-better yet, I should make that milk. Juice and toothpaste was a terrible combination-speaking from experience of years, taking bitter mouthfuls of straight orange just moments after I’d brushed my teeth.

“Hazel?” She croaked, just as I’d reached the landing. “Can you come in here, please?”

Sighing quietly to myself, I turned back around. Balanced the tea atop the plate, beside the toast, I carefully eased the door open. It was dark inside; the curtains drawn tight, blocking any trace of sunlight from leaking through. Audrey’s bed was but a messy tangle of sheets and blankets, and amidst the pile somewhere, was my sister. The only part of her visible being the untameable mop of coal-black waves, covering one of the pillows. I didn’t dare turn the light on, fearing I may get snapped at if I do, and the smell was…bad. It was like she’d been sick at some point, but I couldn’t tell when, where, or how old it was.

“Audrey, what’s the matter?” I asked her gently, placing the breakfast down onto her bedside table. “Mum and dad are worried that you’re sick.”

“I think I am, but…oh god, I can’t tell them! They’ll kill me.”

“It can’t be that bad,” I soothed, running my fingers over the wild waves of hair. “If you’d like, I can pick something up for you after school? Some lemon-honey tea? Ginger beer? Why don’t I make you that hangover cure; it might help.”

“No Hazel, it’s nothing like that!...If I tell you, you’ve got to swear you won’t tell mum and dad. They’ll just overreact.”

“It depends on what it is,” I told her firmly. “What if it’s something serious? They’d never forgive me if I didn’t say anything.”

“You? What about me?! This is my mess, and if they found out they’d be so disappointed.”

“Do you want to tell me or not? I won’t mind if you don’t. If you just want me to get something for you, I can do that. You don’t need to tell me what’s going on.”

“Hazel, I want to tell you, it’s just…I think someone roofied me Saturday night.”

Roofied? Oh…Now I understood. Somebody drugged Audrey’s drink, and then…I couldn’t even think about it. If anything had happened to Audrey, I don’t know what I’d do.

“I’ve been feeling sick, all through Sunday, and last night, I was mostly in the bathroom.” She at last, emerged from the blankets. Her face paler than it’s normal shade of porcelain. “I still feel nauseous, but I don’t know if I can throw up anything more. It’s mostly bile now, but I haven’t dared eat anything. I think it’ll just make me even sicker.”

“Nonetheless, you should eat something.” I said, “You know it’s not good to vomit up bile. If you want something plainer, I’ll ask mum if she can make you some eggs or perhaps some soup. I’ll tell her you’ve caught a twenty-four-hour bug from a friend at the party, so that should buy you some time to figure out what’s going on.”

“Thanks, Hazel,” She mustered a weak smile. “If you could get me something for me from the chemist…I’d like one of those family-planning kits. I haven’t skipped my period yet, but I’d like to be on the safe side.”

A pregnancy test?! Now she’d really given me a challenge. We knew the lady who ran the front till at the chemist; how was she to react if I just walked up to the counter, engaged in small-talk about her grandkids and school, then just handed her the pregnancy test like I was buying something as simple as bobby-pins?! She was a kind woman, Mrs Grant, but she had to be one of the biggest gossips in Derby. If she saw me, buying a pregnancy test, then the word would spread like wildfire that the youngest Kazia girl just might be expecting. Word would get back to my parents, they’d be forcing some very awkward conversations about ‘the birds and the bee’s’ then dad, of course, would demand to know who the ‘young man’ that got me into trouble was. The rumour would only fuel the vendetta those girls had against me, and the next thing I know, teachers would be asking if I needed time off school for the…. Good god, was I overreacting! It was just a trip to the chemist. And besides, if I convinced Mrs Grant that the test was for a friend, then it might be a little more believable for her. After all, she was always asking me why I haven’t met a ‘nice fella’ yet.

“Hazel?” Audrey brought my attention back to her. “Can you do it?”

“Of course, I can,” I masked my anxiety, just enough for her to believe it. “I’ll see if I can get it to you over my lunch break.”

“Oh, thank you Hazel! Thank you, thank you, thank you!” She sighed, flinging her arms around my neck. Her breath smelt sour against my neck, her hair almost void of it’s sweetly-scented shampoo. I think the next thing she needed to do was take a bath. “I owe you for this.”

“And don’t you forget it,” I chuckled, pulling back. “Now eat your breakfast, and run yourself a bath. No offence, but you need it.”

“I’ll bear that in mind,” She treated me to another smile. “What’s the time?”

I peered down at my watch. Oh no! There’d be no time for breakfast, I’d have to get going right away.

“Hazel!” It was mum’s voice, coming from the landing. “Come on, you’ll be late for school!”

“Coming!” After bidding a quick goodbye to Audrey, I shot into my bedroom to collect my schoolbag then padded back downstairs. Nick was just about to open the front door by the time I reached it, and a good thing too! I walked, right out the door, calling goodbye to my parents as I descended the gravelled path. As predicted, the sun was beating down on everything. From the pine trees on the farms before us, to the distant mountains in the view beyond. Though the grass was still wet with dew as I passed it, I knew that would dry soon enough. With weather like this, it wasn’t hard to assume.

“What was Audrey talking to you about?” Nick asked me, as we rounded the corner that led us down the main road.

“Like I said to mum and dad, she’s caught a bug over the weekend, and she can’t go into work today.”

“You said it was a twenty-four-hour bug,” He said, “Forgive me if I’m wrong, but don’t twenty-four-hour bugs only last twenty-four hours?”

“I suppose she caught it early in the morning then,” I said, trying to sound off-hand about it. Was it working? I didn’t think so.

“Maybe,” He hummed, “But it still doesn’t add up. Maybe she was mistaken.”

“Yes, maybe she was.” I said, “I said I’d pick something up from the chemist for her at lunch, but she very well might feel better by then.”

“So, what does she need?”

“Why the third degree?”

“No reason, I just have calculous this afternoon and I thought I’d go back to get my exercise book. If she needs something from the chemist, I could always go and get it.”

“It’s nice of you, but I really think I should get it myself.”

“Forgive me for being too blunt, but I don’t think buying a pregnancy test is really going to help your reputation at school.”

I looked at him, shocked and a little angry. He’d been eavesdropping?! No, he couldn’t have. He was already at the door by the time I got downstairs-and if he even tried to run straight downstairs after I left her room, there was a definite chance that I would’ve heard him.

“It wasn’t a hard guess,” I answered my unspoken question with a shrug. “I heard her last night-in the loo, puking her guts out. When you send someone to go to the chemist the day after, it kind of speaks for itself.”

He was right. Even if we didn’t know she was pregnant yet, her getting sick and me going to the chemist really did make the insinuation obvious.

“It’s just a precaution,” I reasoned, “She doesn’t know anything, but she wants to be on the safe side, just in case.”

“That’s fair,” He agreed, “But are you really going to buy her a pregnancy test? What if your parents find it somehow?”

“If that problem ever occurs, we’ll think of something.” I said, “Audrey’s an adult-she shouldn’t have to hide these things from our parents.”

“And yet she’s having you sneak around for her.” Damnit, he was right again! “Why do you do it? If your parents are so open and trusting of her, why does she need you to do her dirty work?”

“Because she doesn’t want to worry them!” I argued, “And…she’s my sister. When I was at my worst, Audrey was always there to pick me back up again. I owe it to her to be there when she needs me.”

He was silent for a little while, just looking at me as we walked. He was doing it again. Saying something with his eyes, that he either didn’t deem important enough to tell me with words, or didn’t really want me to know. Nick really was an enigma sometimes. One moment he’s laughing and joking, like a regular teenager, the next he’s sending an array of silent messages that I couldn’t decipher. Complicated, I decided. Like me, he was simply complicated.

“How far would you go to help her?” He finally asked, “Even if it meant you got hurt?”

How did he expect me to answer a question like that? Audrey was my sister, my best friend, my family! If she really needed it, I’d be willing to do anything if it meant she could be safe and happy. Not that we’d ever face a situation that dire! And yet, Nick wanted to know anyway. He had a sister too; he should know how close that bond can be.

“It…depends,” I confessed, “If she genuinely needed it, I’d sacrifice whatever I could. But if she didn’t….”

“If she didn’t what?”

“If she didn’t really need my help, then I would have to think twice.”

He must’ve thought there was a tinge of doubt in me-and there was, but it wasn’t to do with Audrey. When Ingrid was younger, she was entirely under the thumb of her two, elder sisters. She loved Kathy and Camille and was willing to do anything and everything for them. They knew it, and they used it to their full advantage. She was treated like their own, personal slave, let them talk about her like she was nothing but a nuisance, and went along with their silly, little plans, just so she could have their approval. The spell was broken on Ingrid when their little schemes had gone too far. When they were twelve, and she was nearly ten, they were trying to pick apples, so they could smother them in toffee and sell them at a school fair, but when they realised they could get the profits with only half the labour involved, they decided to coerce Ingrid into climbing one of their orchid trees to get the ripest apples. They knew it could’ve been dangerous, and that Ingrid was afraid of heights, and yet they made her do it anyway. Ingrid fell, Ingrid broke her arm, and Ingrid was driven to the nearest, out-of-town hospital. That, of course, was when Ingrid’s parents found out and placed the ultimate punishment on the twins; grounded for a month without allowance, technology, or visits from their friends. And, did they suffer from it! Kathy and Camille thrived from social interaction, and to have that taken away for an entire month was pure torture. In fairness however, they did feel genuinely guilty-for a little while, at least. In addition to their punishment, they waited on Ingrid hand and foot-to this day, Ingrid still talks about the one and only time they ever did something nice for her.

Audrey wasn’t like Kathy and Camille, and never would be. And yet, I somehow learnt a small lesson from Ingrid’s experience. Just because you say you need something, it doesn’t make it a necessity. With that being said, did Audrey need a pregnancy test? Her being sick, could very well be her body getting the sedative out of her system. And there was mum and dad-how on earth would they react if they found the test in the bin, or something? Doubt was creeping into me-and I knew who was creating it. Nick might be friendly with me now, but he still didn’t like Audrey, and she made it clear how much she disliked him.

“You know, she could’ve asked one of her friends to do it.” He said, as the school gates came into view. “It wouldn’t look so surprising if the person buying them isn’t a vi- “

“What?”

“What I mean is, it can be embarrassing to buy something like that, even if it is for a friend, that’s all.”

“Buy many pregnancy tests before?”

“I don’t want to brag, but yes.” He chuckled, looking away from me as the slightest tinge of pink touched the apple of his cheek. Was he…blushing? “I had friend, back in London who needed one-and no, I wasn’t sleeping with her.” He said, answering the unsaid question in my puzzled expression. “She was dating this older guy. One night, the condom broke, and she was worried. I went to the chemist with her, but she got scared. She just kept looking back and forth between the test and the man at the counter, and she was petrified. So, I did what any good friend would do and I took it to the counter myself. It was embarrassing, and the old lady behind the till kept telling me what a good, young boyfriend I was, but it had to be done so I did it.”

“That was…” I was at loss for words-at least, for a few seconds. “Kind of you.”

“Well, contrary to popular belief, I can be a decent person at times.” He laughed again, but the laughter couldn’t reach his eyes. “I’m only bad, when I choose to be.”

“Why do you choose to be bad?” I was genuinely curious.

“Because the world needs an even balance between good and bad,” He replied with a smirk. “And besides, good boys don’t have any fun.”

“Being the bad boy’s completely original then?”

“This is coming from the girl wearing a blouse done up to the neck and a crinoline under that below-knee skirt?” He looked at me and I did giggle. He had me there!

“Alright then, so we both dress like a stereotype,” I conceded, “But to make it clear, I don’t like the idea of living in a pre-made role. It was tempting though; it always seemed like the safer path to choose, and for somebody who was afraid of everything, it felt almost perfect.”

“But you didn’t want to live a life laid out in front of you,” He said, understanding. “So, riddle me this; if you could have any life you wanted, what would it be, and why?”

“I…if I could have any life, I’d want to have the life of Gerda Wegener.”

“Who’s Gerda Wegener?”

“Have you ever heard of Lilli Elbe?” He shook his head, meaning no. “Lilli Elbe was reported the second, lawful, transgender woman. But before there was Lilli, Elbe was a man named Einar Wegener. His wife, Gerda Wegener became renown as an artist during the twenties, and most of her paintings were of a mysterious woman with haunting, almond eyes. Her fans were shocked when they found out the beautiful model was actually her husband in drag.”

“Imagine all the men!” He scoffed, “When they find out the hot girl in the paintings was a guy, all along.”

“Certainly, a shock to them,” I agreed, “Her life might not have been very nice after Lilli died- “

“Wait-Lilli dies?”

“Oh yeah-it was actually a big deal. Lilli was to undertake some operations to make the transition permanent. If the operations were to work, Lilli would’ve had a working uterus, and perhaps she could’ve even had children. Problem is, as dad would say, you can put a small box inside a big box, but you can’t make it belong there. After the third operation, it just didn’t work for Lilli. She died.”

“Wow,” In his eyes, swam a mixture of awe, and a little sadness. “What happened to Gerda?”

“Although Gerda had separated from Einar after he became Lilli, she still loved him-or her, at that point. She stuck with Lilli for as long as she could-even sent her flowers after one of the operations. After Lilli died, things just went badly for poor Gerda. She married a man who squandered her money, her paintings went out of style, so nobody wanted to buy them, and she was making a poor living off of painting postcards.”

“If her life turned out so badly, why would you want one of the same?”

“Because she had something good in it-even if it only lasted a short amount of time.”

We were at the gates now. Ingrid and Flora were waiting for me on one side, and Anton was waiting for Nick on the other. Upon catching a glimpse of me, my friends came running. Flora’s arms around my neck, and Ingrid’s around my waist. Up close, I caught a nauseating whiff of Flora’s bubble-gum deodorant, and felt the softness of Ingrid’s scarf, an indigo satin, brushing my cheek. It was good to see them! Being trapped in the house for a week, with only literature to keep me sane, was trying at times. And so being brought back to the constant insanity of my friends, despite only being away for a week, was an unlikely comfort. I think I even missed the confusing smells that came from the tuck shop at times! Well, the familiarity of it, anyway.

“She’s here, the survivor!” Flora cried, “We’ve got so much to fill you in on, and so little time!”

“I think Flora’s trying to say that we missed you.” Ingrid explained with a merry, little laugh. “Come on, we still have time to hang out before form time.”

Flora and Ingrid were pulling me away, completely oblivious to the conversation I’d just had with Nick a little earlier. Then I remembered-as far as they knew, nothing had changed. Yet, another gap that would have to be filled eventually.

“Oh Hazel, I nearly forgot!” As if he sensed what I was thinking, Nick had approached. Pulling out a bulging paper-bag from his backpack. “Your mum asked me to give you your lunch.”

“Err…thank you,” I took the bag from him, offering a small smile. “I’ll see you later.”

“Safe learning, seedlings!” Anton said as they departed, “And no more swimming pools-just for a little while!”

The three of us gave a little laugh before we continued on our merry way. When we got to our regular spot beneath the tree, Leo was already there, doing what he normally did: homework. As the three of us approached however, Leo managed to peel his eyes from his text book to watch as the three of us came to greet him. Treating me to a crooked grin, riddled with well-kept but crooked teeth, Leo did something I’d rarely seen him do. He put his book down and stood to shake my hand.

“Hazel! It’s good to see you alive and kicking.” He said, “So you got the week of school! Was it pure freedom?”

“More like imprisonment, when you’ve got a bad ankle.” I reminded him with a chuckle as I sat down. “It wasn’t so bad though; I got a lot of reading done.”

“And no chores?” Flora piped.

“At least not until my ankle was better.” I said, “So, I’ve been dying to know-what’s going on here? I ran into Margaret Ottoman on my way to run an errand Saturday, and she told me all about the fight with Shantell Travers and Nicholas.”

“Oh, that!” Flora giggled, “I swear, nobody has ever talked to Shantell like that before! And Christ almighty, he was harsh! I think I liked the part about her being an insecure virgin with no brain or self-respect.”

“Nothing else like that has happened if that’s what you’re wondering.” Ingrid reasoned, “But those girls…it’s strange. They haven’t said one word about you since you’ve been gone-it’s like your name is taboo or something. Not even the guys have said anything! It’s like whatever Nicholas said to her was a warning meant for all of them. It worked though, so I don’t have any complaints. It means they can’t wander over here and do their subtle-not-subtle bitching for us to endure.”

“It’s good to know,” I said to her earnestly. “So, no more fist fights?”

“No more fist fights,” She confirmed, smiling. “So, where’s Marlon?”

“At the school office, checking out the confirmation forms from Green Thumb.” Leo said, “I thought you’d be there too.”

Green Thumb! I’d nearly forgotten. I was about to make a move to head to the office when I saw Marlon, sprinting over, with a sheet of wrinkled paper clutched in his hand. His renovated shoes did look kind of cool as he ran. Striped in neon green and yellow, the plain, black laces replaced with scarlet-red ones. And judging by the wild grin on his face, I could definitely assume the news was good.

“Check it out!” He said, handing the sheet to us. “The newest recruits on Green Thumb’s marketing team! And Hazel, look! You’re there too!”

Me? I haven’t made the application process any further than rose pruning part-time every autumn. But when Ingrid handed me the sheet, there it was, printed in black and white. ‘Hazel Kazia: Promotional Photography’. My first job! I couldn’t believe I finally had a photography job! Well, not one that paid, but I didn’t care about that. At last, I’d be getting the work experience I’d been searching for! Nothing but good photography, good weather, and good company for the entire autumn. Suffice to say, I’d be busy; too busy to even worry about those girls or any other drama that should arise. And when I had a thorough look at the sheet, I spotted Marlon’s name too. He’d be a marketing intern! So much good news and it was only eight-thirty in the morning!

“Nice one guys!” Leo congratulated us. “I’ve heard this is supposed to be Green Thumb’s biggest sales season yet! With all those fancy-shmancy gardening competitions coming up and all.”

“And dad reckons they give the most glowing references for uni applications,” Flora added with a smile. “Don’t they give you guys a call on the same day?”

“Either this afternoon or the day after,” Marlon confirmed. “Oh shoot! We’d better get to class before Miss Kotter makes you lot wear the sombrero of shame.”

Ah yes-an idea she stole from a Drew Barrymore movie. Normally, those who wanted to get to class on time were considered teacher’s pets-but when you were in Miss Kotter’s class, and you happened to be late, she forced any latecomers to wear ‘the sombrero of shame’. A big, rainbow-coloured monstrosity of a hat with little bells attached to the brim, and the words ‘I was late’ stitched across the front. Nobody liked to wear it, hence why nobody was late.

Bidding Marlon and Flora goodbye for the morning, Leo, Ingrid and I took our seats in form class, while Miss Kotter went over some paperwork for another class. Leo continued with his homework, Ingrid took out her sheet music for her weekly revision, and I took out the book about Hetty Velrome and picked up on where I’d left off. As time passed, few by few, the class began to fill a little more. Until the class bell sounded, and Miss Kotter began to take the roll once more.

“Listen up, everyone! To celebrate the beginning of Autumn, the school is holding a Halloween ball in celebration! Volunteers for the organization committee are more than welcome to sign up. Just put your name and house number on the sign-up sheet on the front door of Ms. Haze’s office. Those who want to buy ticket can do so from the seventeenth of October, right until the very night, as we’ll be selling tickets at the door. And if you’re ever in need for a mask, the year twelve textiles classes are custom-making them as part of their internals! Isn’t that great?”

It certainly sounded great, and I knew in an instant that Flora would be all over this like a rash. Knowing that she was thinking the same thing, Ingrid and I shared a knowing smirk. How many of us would she succeed in recruiting for this school event?

“Oh, and don’t forget to dress up!” She reminded us-as if we wouldn’t dress up on Halloween?! “And see the school newsletter for costume restrictions-Michael, I’m talking to you.”

We all knew that. Last year, he was hauled into the principal’s office on a particular mufti day that involved a lime-green mankini, a rubber that had fallen to the floor, and at least five traumatized students who were eye-level with the unfortunate sight.

“Let’s see what we’ve got here!” Ingrid grinned, as she caught hold of one of the newsletters. “No Hitler’s-no surprises there.”

“No Nazi’s or KKK robes,” Leo read out. “No illuminati, no vulgar interpretations of Hasidic Jews…” The list went on, just like that. I think the school was trying to learn from it’s past mistakes in order to have us appear more tasteful.

“This is BS!” We heard Michael complaining from the back. “I had a right, fit costume planned for Halloween!”

“I didn’t know you still celebrated,” His friend, Oliver sniggered.

“What’s not to celebrate? Lollies, parties, girls in hot outfits?”

“True that!” His other friend, Jesse, congratulated him with a hi-five. “Miss Kotter, will you be dressing up?”

“As your worst nightmare,” She retorted, “I don’t really know yet-I’ll be chaperoning with Mr. Fowler, so you’ll be guaranteed to see me there at some point.”

Banter continued like this until the five-minute bell sounded for first period. School, oh school! How I have missed you. I didn’t think it likely, but I did appreciate school now, more than ever. When things seemed unlikely and topsy-turvy, I could still count on school to stay the same. Portrait-painting in art class, the smell of fried chips and banana cake flavouring the lunchtime air, and yes-even Miss Kotter. She might be quirky, a little over-bearing and enthusiastic, but school certainly wasn’t the same without her.

{}

Classes came and ended with a few, new facts, some homework from last week, and a few ‘I hope you’re feeling betters’ from the teachers. Before I knew it, it was lunchtime. Goody, I thought. This meant going to the chemist, facing Mrs Grant, and smuggling a pregnancy test into my house, right under mum and dad’s noses. Hmm, I wondered if I could call mum, just to check whether or not she was in the house? I’d call her to tell her the good news about my internship, and then mention that I left my assigned novel for English at home. I could tell Ingrid to let the others know I’d be back soon, and as soon as I went through with it, I could go back and eat lunch with my friends as if nothing had happened. It sounded like a good plan! A great plan, really…oh, who was I kidding? I’d never get away with it. I was too skittish, too obvious to fool Mrs Grant, let alone our parents. Still, I made a promise to my sister, and I wasn’t prepared to break it because I was too scared. Come on Hazel, I told myself. Don’t be a coward. Audrey was always willing to help you, so now it’s your turn to help her.

The second we were let go, I wandered down the corridor. Finding a fairly secluded spot as I fished out my little, black phone. Swiping through my contacts, I quickly pressed down onto mum’s number and waited as the dial tone went through.

“Hazel? Is everything alright?”

“Yeah, everything’s fine mum. I just wanted to tell you some good news.”

“Is it Green Thumb? Please tell me it’s Green Thumb…”

“It’s Green Thumb-I got the internship.”

“Oh Hazel, that’s fantastic! Just wait ‘till I tell your father. He’s in the shed right now, fixing up Mrs Lambart’s radio-he’ll be delighted. Well done darling!”

“Thanks mum,” despite myself, I was grinning. It felt really good, hearing the pride in her voice. “Oh-I’m just calling to say that I left my English novel- “

“I know-Nicholas came to pick it up,” Wait-Nick? “He said you left it behind, and were going back to get it so he decided to save you the trouble-isn’t that sweet?”

But Nick knew clearly well that I didn’t need to pick up my…oh. No, he couldn’t have! Could he?

“Incredibly sweet,” I replied, “I’ll find him now and thank him. How is Audrey coping?”

“She’s a little better-well, better enough to come downstairs. She came to get something for lunch, then took refuge on the sofa to eat. She does look awfully pale, but I’m hopeful that a little soup and tea will brighten her up a bit.”

“I’m sure it will,” I agreed, trying to sound optimistic. “Can I go to Lilac Park after school? Just for a little while.”

“Well, you’re all healed up so as long as there’s no swimming, that’s fine.” She permitted, “But please be home by five-we’ll make a celebration dinner, in honour of your victory!”

“Mum, you don’t have to- “

“Oh, but I do! It’ll be nice to celebrate something, Hazel. And you’ve been after some promotional work at Green Thumb since you started at Derby High.” She did have a point.

“Alright then. I’ll see you tonight, mum!”

“Goodbye Darling!”

As soon as she hung up, I quickly found Audrey’s contact and punched in a quick text. I had to make sure my suspicions were true before I jumped to conclusions.

Hazel: Did Nick come by already? I swear, I didn’t tell him about the test. He guessed!

Audrey: I know, Hazel. He brought me the test, and explained everything. I’m not mad at you…but I want to talk to you later tonight.

Hazel: That’s fine-I’ll be at Lilac Park for a little while, but I’ll be home by five.

Audrey: Be safe ❤

I let out a loud sigh of relief. I didn’t have to go through with that! And…it was because of Nick. Why would he do that? He couldn’t stand Audrey, and yet he bought a pregnancy test for her and managed to smuggle it into the house without a second thought. Now Nicholas Koster really confused me. This morning, we had a genuinely nice conversation; it was almost like I was talking with a close friend. And now he went and did this…if Nick Koster didn’t have a heart, like he claimed, then I had a lot of trouble believing it. He punched a guy I couldn’t stand, insulted a girl who spread rumours about me, and helped my sister when she didn’t owe him a thing-he could’ve told me he just had a weak-spot for women in need, but I think it was more than that. I think that the less sad he felt, the more liberated he was to care about people. It did make we wonder, how much pain could he have felt when we were children, to make him hate me so much? How different could they possibly make him feel? The Nicholas I knew was perfect in almost every way. The golden-haired, golden-boy with everything going for him. Whoever told him that he couldn’t fit in must’ve been a cruel tormentor indeed, if the bully I had was what he had become afterwards.

Stop thinking about him! I told myself. Nick Koster might not be a bad person, but he doesn’t want to be your friend. English. He only wanted me to help him in English class. That’s what I chanted inwardly as I walked to meet the group at our favourite tree. Ingrid and Leo were going halves in a packet of sandwich tuna and crackers, Bridget was chowing down on a fruit salad with yogurt dip, and Marlon was indulging in some forbidden Pepsi he’d smuggled in with his thermos. Dumping my back pack onto the ground, I fell down next to Flora, who was just unpacking her own lunch. Tiny teddies, wagon-wheels and egg sandwiches-of course. I could smell the beginnings of a sulphur-like smell as soon as she opened her lunch box.

“What’ve you got?” She asked me, watching as I opened up my paper bag. Hmm…mum’s honeycomb biscuits, plums and a chicken roll. Not a bad spread, I thought, picking up the plums first. They were probably from the Ottoman’s farm-they sold their left-over plums from time to time to clear their stock. Although I’m not always their favourite customer (for complicated reasons), they were perfectly fine with selling their plums and jams to mum at most opportunities.

“Nice,” Flora commented, “Here-would you look at the two of them?”

I glanced over to where she was pointing. Ingrid, feeding a cracker into Leo’s mouth. It was sweet, like lady and the tramp…oh. It was so simple; how could I not have seen it before? Ever since we were ten years old, Leo, Ingrid and I have been the best of friends. Ingrid was kind, quirky and cheeky, and Leo was like a brother to me. But he wasn’t a brother to Ingrid, was he? Even though he was incredibly kind to me, he never quite regarded Ingrid in the same way. Was he? Were they? No! Surely, it was just Flora’s imagination. But then, what if it wasn’t? What if she was onto something?

“I didn’t know they liked to eat cheese and crackers so…intimately.” I commented, the sight of it quite alien to me.

“Neither did I! Do you think they’re doing it without knowing it?”

“Doing what?”

“You know! Being coupley.”

“Well, I don’t think they have. Honestly though, for somebody who’s got so much book-smarts, he sure looks silly if he hasn’t noticed before we have.”

“Couldn’t agree with you more-but we ought to know whether it’s true love before we do anything.”

“Wait-what do you mean, do anything?”

“You know-setting them up on a date!” She squealed, clapping her hands together. “Ooh! We can be like spies! We can follow them in secret and watch them do stuff like the food thing! Or we can find a way to make them jealous. We can send Ingrid anonymous love-letters and when she tells Leo about them, we can find out if he likes her for sure.”

“Flora, calm down!” I said, hushing her in case either of them were to overhear. “If you want to interfere in the love-lives of our friends, I can’t stop you. But I’m not helping! They’re my best friends- “

“Exactly! They’re your best friends. You know them better than anybody, you know what they like to do together. Come on Hazel, you want them to be happy, don’t you?”

“Of course, I do!”

“Well then, how can they be happy if they’re in love with each other and they don’t even know it?”

“Flora, this is a convoluted plan and I want nothing to do with it! - “

“Well then, you’re denying them a chance at being happy together!” She sulked, turning her chin up. “If you won’t help me, I’ll find people who will. Hey Bridget! Marlon! Over here!”

I went to sit on the other side of Ingrid as Flora began to plot with my other friends. Ingrid barely acknowledged I was there, but I didn’t mind this time-it gave me time to think. If Leo and Ingrid really did like each other, then only time could reveal that for sure. In the meantime, I was intent on butting out and letting it unfold naturally. Things never quite happened naturally lately; Audrey being sick, Nick and I becoming friends. Not even Green Thumb felt natural to me; it was like an opportunity that just came out of the blue, meant for somebody who was far better than I was. My life might’ve been on the verge of insanity, but Ingrid and Leo’s didn’t have to be. If good things could happen to them without us interfering, then I would have to talk Flora out of her crazy plans. But how to do it…